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*Gasp* That's the most evil plan I've heard of! It's too cruel! I must stop you at all costs! It seems like I need to cooperate with the cats again... Sign... I'll have to promise them food resources but they are really diligent. They see EVERYTHING, they can find anyone. Including aliens.
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Oh, actually... now that I think about it, this method is simply impossible to execute. Some aliens might think their plan is one made by a genius but the real world will prove them wrong. Buying all of the chocolate factories? As if that's so easy to do. Does Smj not realize how precious this resource is in the Galaxy? Many of Earth's chocolate companies are actually owned by chocolate-crazed alien guys (*evil hidden bosses*) who would do practically anything to stop those who would threaten their Earthen factories. It isn't only humans who would kill for it, how come Smj isn't aware of that? He might be in trouble soon if he continues his 'brilliant' project. Many aliens buy chocolate on a daily basis and not many planets can produce this product. In this Universe, only the Earth has the right environmental conditions for it so some creatures out there in space would be really angry if someone snatched their favourite snack from them... And would stop at nothing to get the one who took it away.
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Smj:
NO, not the cats!!!! I have one and she is just too cute I can't get rid of her to protect the information!!!!! I know, I will bribe her with a lot of hugs, massages and food! I knew I shouldn't have taken her but when I saw her she melted my three hearts <3 <3 <3
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Inga06:
Sorry but we have a lot of methods to make your cat cooperate. For example catmint! They can't control themselves after sniffing even a little bit and will tell us everything! There's no escape from 'Space Police', as everyone calls us!
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Smj:
Too late, people have already started to fight for chocolate (Nutella) in France (there are videos of that on the internet)!!!!
Well, it's not my only plan so you'll not find me before it's too late!
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Inga06:
Is it already too late?! This plan of yours... we need to try harder and perhaps get rid of this so-called 'chocolate' I keep on hearing about. I never actually tried it but I heard it can be quite addictive for many races and even if we have to fight with some dangerous elements to take care of this problem, we might just have to go that far in this case.
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*subordinate comes in*
-Madam, we procured a sample of 'chocolate', a product coming from Earth. What would you like us to do with it?
-Examine and exterminate if deemed dangerous!
-Consider it as done, Madam! - the man in an exquisite black suit left quickly and returned 15 minutes later.
-Report!
-Yes! According to our scientists 'chocolate' is mildly addictive and not nearly enough to cause a destruction of a planet!
...what?
-That shouldn't be possible!! Bring me the sample, ASAP!
-It's right here, Madam!
I instantly put the small piece inside of my mouth and... a volcano-sized eruption of pleasure in my mouth left me lying exhausted on the floor.
... if this can't destroy worlds than I don't know what will! Dangerous! I nearly lost myself there...
-Orders! Send our 'Executioners' to Earth! We will deal with this plague and... collect all the available chocolate products for further analysis. And then we will destroy it all! We will... I will...
I have to get rid of this taste in my mouth. It's driving me crazy and as F..., I mean, the leader's right-hand woman (while the left hand is unoccupied), I'm not allowed to brain-freeze like that! Get a hold of yourself!
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Smj:
You will not be able to live without chocolate anymore Mouahahaha...
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...
...
...
Phew! Now I can finally think!
-Everybody stop! I revoke my previous orders! Do not mess with the chocolate situation on Earth unless it becomes critical! It's not like this resource isn't already protected by some mighty guys from the whole Galaxy... I seriously doubt that anyone could endanger the chocolate factories there when they're so well protected by the alien mafia. We ignore it for now! Ok then everybody, go ahead and continue your work!
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Inga06:
*cough, cough*
...
Don't be so happy, Smj. I have not given in to chocolate yet!
...
And I can't anyways. It turns out that my species is unable to consume cocoa seeds - it actually makes us sick! No, like a real cold, not indigestion.
*cough, cough*
Ugh. My throat hurts a bit and there's a slight fever... And my wings seem heavier than usual... This sucks. My underlings all tiptoe around my commanding chair and don't dare to come closer.
Hah! I'll get better soon and then we'll know who can destroy Earth on my watch! But not now... This blanket is just so soft and fluffy! *Yawn* I'll simply go to sleep for now. Goodnight.