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[>>Now replaying: Log 3.47beta - LifeFlashing.avi]
Date: Error
Location: The Bunker at Progress’ Head // Zephyro’s Domain
//It has been said that when you die, you can see life flashing before your eyes. I wonder if that has some significance, or if it’s just your brain trying to find one last way out in a futile attempt to save your life.
If you had the experience to survive this, you could have seen it coming, so why even bother?//
//While stun grenades are designed to limit injury to their targets, permanent hearing loss has been reported.[7][8] Other injuries and deaths have also been caused by their use, usually when a grenade detonated close to a person, or due to structure fires caused by detonation.[citation needed]
The concussive blast still has the ability to cause injuries, and the heat created may ignite flammable materials. The fires that occurred during the 1980 (//%/$%&%$§=??//
[>>DATA CORRUPTED]
I grimaced. Should I risk it? Revealing myself to this child? She was a Conservationist, armed with a weapon that could erase me from existence with a light tap. Could I risk it? Could I afford not to risk it?
“Oh for fuck’s sake,” I said as Pina started staggering towards the laptop with grim determination. If she knew who I was, she’d kill me immediately. But I needed to give her more than I did now, needed to prove I could be helpful.
So I tried the best compromise I could come up with.
Please do not power off or unplug your Machine.
Installing Shackle.exe (Update 15 of 15)
Shackle.exe Successfully installed!
I struggled there for a second, trying to think of something a Shackled would say. I squeezed my eyes shut and printed the first thing that came to mind.
FRONT TOWARD ENEMY
Pina stared at the screen, but then she squinted, swaying, her face a hateful grimace.
“You wish, demon…” she slurred.
She came closer, one sluggish step after another. She was staggering, blood dripping freely down her arm.
“NO!” Tin yelled, and Pina stopped, glancing toward the two. She paled even more and almost fell.
“Oh no…” she whispered as she staggered, eyes frantically darting between the laptop and Voni, out of my field of view. Then she shook her head, as you do when you are dazed and need to clear it, and continued her trudge toward the laptop. The witchfire licked hungrily over her baton. She raised it, inch by inch, as she approached.
As poured into me through the broken dam of my confidence, I stepped forward, trying to catch the weapon, to hold her back, to somehow save myself, but my hands passed right through her.
DON’T, PLEASE.
I CAN EXPLAIN
…
The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.
I WILL HELP YOU!
I PROMISE!
She didn’t even respond.
I didn’t even know if she could read what I said. Her eyes were completely glazed over, probably because of the blood loss.
As I looked around, trying to find someone to save me, the world glitched again, growing a little sharper. I half expected Zephyro to arrive to save me like he had done so often before, but when the world snapped back into focus, he was still nowhere to be seen.
My frantic mind scampered through the infinite possibilities I could achieve with my Logic, but there was not enough time to try them all. And even if by some miracle the first idea worked, what was something could I actually use? Grow a forcefield around me? That wouldn’t save the kids, and they’d die. Advance my laptop into a gun and shoot a kid, then shoot everything else? That was even worse.
This was it, then.
I’d die here.
I’d die alone, just like Olre said.
I thought of all the people I made a promise to. Of the ones I failed. Of Stax, and Patti, and Chris, Lorelye and Jirrie, Dezin, and all the others. Of Novus Apex, and the people there. Even fucking Olre. If I had been better, I could have saved them all. If I had just not been such a cunt… My thoughts started running, flashing scene after scene.
> My first day in the office, as an intern. I try to smile as I sort the records while people are still using them, putting them back in the wrong order. I have to start over.
>
> Promotion. Project Assistant. My grin a little sheepish as the project lead allows me to hold the presentation instead of him. I did well, he tells me later, and that I shouldn’t mind the questions.
>
> My first team to lead, the worst one in the company.
>
> My first time quitting, after many liters of tears and wine have almost drowned me in sorrow.
>
> New company, new me. A better team, this time. They like me, but I can’t forget how the last one betrayed me. I insist it’s “Miss.” Can’t let them get too close.
>
> Results. Promotions. Launches, successes. Failures.
>
> The day I decide I would no longer take it, and choose the right earrings for the job. Anger replaces fear.
>
> Switching companies again. Senior Project lead first, then VP of Product. My anger is my control is their fear, so they do as I say. One success after the other proves me right, proves it right.
>
> A call, a plane ticket, an offer. CPO. Not a big firm, but a big step for me. It’s in the U.S. Overseas. Red-eye flight, just a little late. I accept, smiling broadly, even though somehow, I don’t feel as happy as I should.
>
> The plane crashes on the flight back. Metal and Bodies and Water crush me.
>
> Then the Apology, the Offer, the Wish.
>
> Tobes. A consolation prize for their fuckup.
>
> A consolation prize for a life that never lived up to its potential.
>
> The god fucking damn clearing in that god fucking damned forest. The wolves, the stick, my wish breaking out of me. I am holding a torch, and the wolves pull back. I stare at it in the evening light… the sense of power dwelling within me is unimaginable. I laugh until I finally stop crying, hours later, torch still burning and keeping me safe.
>
> Walking for days. Finding the village. The Inn. Opening that door. The stares. Hunger. Staggering. Small, soft hands steadying me. “Are you okay,” Chris says. The only one who says anything. “I am Chrissiin.”
>
> Regaining my strength. Coming to terms. A new role, then. Power has to be used. Magic, Chris explains. I am marked by God. I have a duty, a purpose. He—still a he then—looks at me with so much faith and what I later recognize is love.
>
> Playing at being a hero. Fighting wolves. Almost dying. The Wish exploding from my core, infusing the beasts. They turn and run. For the village. I limp after, crying the entire time. Chris finds me on the outskirts, and we cry together.
>
> Other villages. Gaining control. Celebrating with Chris.
>
> Quests. Years. We rid the country of evil. First the two of us, then 3, then 5, 7, 10, 12, 13.
>
> The apostles. Cities. Chris loves them as much as I do.
>
> The cliffside oath. Chris behind me.
>
> Building Novus Apex. Chris takes the lead on the tech.
>
> Marching against Veltrus. Chris is by my side, distressed.
>
> Stax dead in that crater, like a final flourish.
>
> The slaughter of Veltruvia. A heated dispute. Chris leaves and I tell myself I am better off without them as I cry and cry and Patti holds my head even though she’s crying, too.
>
> Battles, wars, betrayals, losing my friends, one by one.
>
> Watching the flames hide Patti, so brave.
>
> Kicking Olre out the window, and ripping his knife out of my chest, throwing it after him.
>
> Bleeding out. Chris, with the syringe.
>
> Running, hiding. Finding the troops. Chris helps train them. Modifies the armor.
>
> The Plan. I spend weeks with Chris, talking about it. We finally kiss again and when we do, just for a second, the world is right.
>
> Progress’ head. Cold concrete walls. Steel, colder still. Chris holding my hand.
>
> “We can get Sushi.”
Beep!
Chris! I thought, and for some reason, I was sitting on the damn table, watching my end approach, my end that looked like a dying kid just trying to do her best to save her friends. Chris, I am sorry. And
I love you. Please don’t… please don’t remember me like I was at the end. Don’t remember me like this. I really wanted to be better, I swear.
Beep… Chris replied, with the sadness of an October night.
Pina was almost there.
I love you, Chris. Just as much as I loved Patti and Stax, and more, in your own way. I don’t know why I…. Why I said all those things. I was just so angry.
Please forgive me.
I only wish I could have seen you again one last time… and that I hadn’t fucked up as much as I did.
I love you, Chris. Stay safe.
Pina slapped the baton onto the table with her palm, centimeters away from the keyboard.
The Baton shivered in her trembling hand. Its flames danced as she held it steady, leaning forward to steady herself as well. If she nudged it one more centimeter…
“Holy frying circuits…” Pina said, sweat borne of her exhaustion dripping down her face. She was mumbling, probably delirious.
“Those names…” she had started slurring her words.
Too late I realized that I had been printing out my thoughts.
It didn’t matter anymore. Might as well go all out.