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Chapter 8: Rest at Last

Once again, I found myself waking in the dark. Some deep part of me felt a very, very distinctive fear at that moment.

I shot up from where I was lying, coughing up a mouthful of dirt. I must have fallen unconscious in the middle of taking a breath. Gasping for air like a dying animal, I spun around, trying to feel for anything, when I found myself falling to the floor.

The impact hurt. I crashed onto my already mangled shoulder, and it felt like the glass inside my body shattered, driving new waves of white hot pain through me. I fought back a scream, clenching my teeth, as I heard a voice next to me.

“Yeowch, that one must be rough. Told you we should’ve picked a more secure stretcher,” someone said. The voice sounded male, and had a playful undertone. It didn’t seem very threatening at all.

“Lady, the cold towel slid from your forehead onto your eyes. I recommend you pull it off before moving any more than you already did,” another voice, this one sounding much older, spoke.

And they were right. There was indeed something distinctly wet stuck to my face. I touched my eyes and pulled it off, seeing myself surrounded by a handful of people.

Most of them seemed to come from the other side, judging by their tone. But I could never be sure. With all the force I could manage with my failing body, I stumbled up from the floor and into a haphazard fighting stance, summoning my spear and circulating what little dregs of Qi filled my core.

“Hey, put the weapon down please. You’re in pretty shit shape, putting it nicely, and I’d really prefer taking you to some healers without racking up a second bill for myself,” the man who’d spoken first said. He was tall and lanky, with springy, curled hair pointing upwards from his head.

I slowly pointed my spear forwards, shuffling back a few steps. I wasn’t in the right state of mind then, and I knew that much, but I wanted to be sure of my situation before trusting a stranger.

A quick check revealed that we were in the middle of the city, and also that there were Edians around. Many of them had their eyes on me, in fact, while others were ushering into their houses. A few of the stronger looking ones seemed ready to break up a fight if it happened.

Taking a deep breath, which made my chest ache like a bitch, I hit the pommel of my spear on the stone, the sound echoing out. One of the people next to the stretcher, a younger woman, probably still in her teens, flinched back, but none made a move. They hadn’t even drawn weapons.

Gazing around a second time, I took in the sights. We were definitely in the city. In fact, taking into account the position of the gate, they’d been carrying me towards the gateway hill. It also had a temple to the gods. They’d probably been taking me there, first, since betting healed by a priest would’ve been much faster than the gateway thing.

It calmed my nerves a little. I was still slightly on edge, but I began leaning on my spear again, rather than pointing it at anyone else. “Thanks,” I ground out. “Appreciate you taking me halfway there, but I think I can make it the remainder of the way myself.” I took a step forward as I spoke, and immediately staggered. My limbs felt like butter.

An older woman spoke. She’d been with the group who carried me, but her face was covered in wrinkles, and her hair white as snow. “Come now, child. You’ll just hurt yourself some more. We humans have to look out for each other.”

The sentence made me grit my teeth. I bit down suddenly enough to draw blood from my cheek. Taking a deep breath, I stumbled a few more steps while I answered. “Last time I heard that it went poorly. I’ll make it to the hill. If you really wanna help, tell my guild to meet me at Lurelia’s temple. Dawn of Ambition.”

With that, I ignored their probably well-placed advice, and simply hobbled onwards. They thought better of it than to touch me, which I was happy for. I’m very sure I would’ve lashed out, and it would have gone poorly for all parties involved. Mostly me, though. Especially me.

Slowly, more like a snail than a human, I made my way through the streets. All the gazes, both from Edians and other people from our side, slid off me. Single-Minded was really showing its worth, here. Everything except the road and the temple disappeared, and even time seemed to speed up.

Step by agonizing step I made it closer, until I finally made it past the stone arch into the place. My guild wasn’t here. It was expected. Either the party who’d saved me hadn’t told them, which seemed unlikely, as much as I wanted to distrust them, or they hadn’t made it here yet.

Whatever the case, I needed to take care of my own business. Taking the deepest breath I could still manage, I set to reciting the oath.

“I invoke the sanctuary of Lurelia so that no harm may come upon my body until I am fully recovered! My possessions are to stay with me in a room assigned by her representatives! Any price will be in full, be that in gold, sweat, or blood. May the goddess be my witness!” With the oath out, I felt a weight settle onto my shoulders for a moment. Usually, all it amounted to was a warm cloak, but in my current state, it drove me to my knees and left me panting.

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Immediately, people swarmed around me, their robes all white and gold. One of them tapped me with a staff, and after a short golden flash of light, my aches lessened.

Someone else helped me into a stretcher, which I sat down on. I didn’t feel like spending the journey on my back.

As the Divinity settled into my bones, I could feel the pain lessen even more. Whoever had used the ability must have been a pretty powerful cleric. It left me feeling so tired, though. One after another, the pains wracking my body disappeared, leaving behind only a deep-sitting emptiness.

I felt apathy. There was no elation there, not yet. Once all of the determination and grit I’d been subsisting off of vanished, it just left me feeling drained.

Somehow, I managed to stay awake a little longer. The staff took me into a room, decorated comfortably. All the colours in it were warm, mainly browns and some gold. The bed itself was white, of course, but not perfectly. It was a bit dull, easy on the eyes.

I was put onto the bed, then shifted and made myself comfortable. Finally, I laid my head down on the pillow. I could feel myself passing out, and a wry smile found its way onto my face, something about me falling unconscious a whole lot recently prompting it.

- - -

When I awoke, the pain was back. Much more dull, now, but also far more noticeable without all the adrenaline in my body. Every single muscle of mine felt on the verge of snapping, every minor movement hurting.

I didn’t care in the slightest.

Ann’s face hung above me. She wasn’t awake. I had no idea what time it was; the room didn’t have any windows.

My hand was still in hers. She must’ve nodded off while looking after me.

None of the other guild members were in the room, but I knew they’d been here. I was more than sure of it, actually, given the small card and fruit basket on the bedside table. It was exactly something Marie would send.

I shook my head at it for half a moment, before the motion made me wince. The tiny motion had Ann’s eyes flutter open.

She looked disorientated for a second, her gaze flickering about the room. I smiled, patient. Well, maybe patient was the wrong word. I don’t think my mouth could’ve handled more than a few croaks.

Then, finally, her eyes settled on me and lit up. I would’ve waved at her, but my arm refused. Then, she collapsed down on me, wrapping my blanketed form in a hug.

It hurt like hell, but I didn’t care in the slightest, shoving my face into her shoulder as much as I could. She cried. I cried as well.

Thinking back on it now, it’s a little embarrassing how filthy I was. Usually, people would be washed, or their clothes changed, but everything on me was stuck to wounds and crusted with blood, so taking it off would have certainly gone poorly. Which meant that I was still wearing my absolutely busted up armor, and was even still in my worn-down boots.

Neither of us cared in the moment. We just laid there, hugging, for a few minutes. Ann clung to me as if I’d disappear again any moment. Maybe I was a little scared it would happen, too.

Eventually, Ann broke the silence.

“I-” she started, then broke down sobbing again. “I thought… You were-”

She trailed off, and buried her head in the blankets some more. I gave a slight nod, though she didn’t see it. Then I waited for her to gather herself some more.

Only after a couple minutes did the sobs quiet down. Ann spoke again. “You’re alive,” she stated, her voice still shaking slightly. She had sat up somewhat again, her eyes now meeting mine. I nodded.

She took a deep breath, then let out a long sigh. Her shoulders sagged, and she looked so tired. I hadn’t noticed the bags under her eyes until then.

“I… cried a lot, you know that?” she asked. “I thought I’d never see you again. That all the memories we’d made here just didn’t matter anymore. I considered… I considered retiring. I almost went through with it.”

When she said those words, I felt a shiver run through me. It was like an iron vice had wrapped around my heart.

Ann and I hadn’t met on the other side yet. If she’d retired… it would very literally mean all her memories of me were gone. Every last one. And she’d be trapped on that hellhole with so little to hold on to.

I squeezed her hand a little, though I couldn’t have managed a lot more if I tried. She looked down at me and nodded. “I know,” she said. “It would’ve been stupid, and rash, but… Who am I kidding, you know exactly why I’d do it.” She said the last part with a pained smile on her lips.

And it was true. I knew exactly why she considered it. We’d been reckless, both of us, not making as many memories as we should have on the other side. Most of our time was spent here, anyway. What else mattered?

But it meant that losing each other hurt all the more. Having the option to just… forget it all, must’ve been almost as painful as losing me in the first place. What would I have done? Held onto those memories, or accepted the easy way out?

“But you’re back,” she said. Her face was so neutral as she said it, then brightened. “You’re alive. Somehow. My Fio made it back alive. All on your own, from the black sands.” She shook her head and I nodded slightly.

“You’re insane. Completely insane. And I love you for it, so much. Imagining you walking with that leg is… crazy. And yet, the clerics told me you walked from the city gates up the entire hill.” She shook her head again. “You’re deranged, Fio,” she said with a smile, “and I’m so thankful for you making it back.”

The mood was infectious, turned from bitter memories to a much more rosy present. I ignored the messages the system wanted me to follow, the whole seeking out a gatekeeper. It could wait, just a little while.

Ann sunk into my arms again. “I’ve got you back,” she muttered into the blankets, a smile plastered onto her face. A similar expression crested my mouth. I enjoyed the moment, everything else could wait.