Looking at the white words against the blue background, he read the prompt.

You defeated the fly! You gained one experience point!

While his eyes traced along with the words, an ominous voice spoke. He knew he was the only one who could hear it. Even so, it was loud and tangible, each word echoing. He reread the prompt, and the voice read with him.

You defeated the fly! You gained one experience point!

Then he decided to try something. He began at the beginning of the prompt again.

You defeated…

He stopped, and so did the voice. Then he read the prompt, again, repeating words and jumping back and forth between others. The voice read whichever word he did, creating a weird kind of beatbox.

You defeated… defeated… you…defeated… fly… defeated… You defeated the fly. Point. Point. Point. Defeated… defeated. You defeated the fly. Point.

Pete chuckled, amused with the makeshift song. Then he asked himself, “how do I close this window? He saw an X on a tab in the top right. Before he could figure out what to do with it, another prompt came, covering the first one.

You gained .5 slapping proficiency.

A third box appeared.

You gained .5 slapping defense.

Slapping defense? He wondered. Did I raise my defense by slapping myself? If that’s the case, building up my defense won’t be difficult at all. He slapped himself on the chest.

You gained .5 slapping proficiency. Slapping proficiency raises to level one.

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You gained .5 slapping defense. Slapping defense raises to level one.

Pete continued to slap himself until his proficiency and defense both raised to level ten. At that point, he stopped receiving bonuses for slapping himself, so he stopped slapping himself; there is no point in slapping yourself if you don’t get anything out of it.

Though he couldn’t see straight ahead, not with all the prompts filling his vision. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed some people staring at him. When Pete realized he had an audience, he tried to focus on something positive. At least he was wearing pants. That made his situation better than when he had been in the pizza and games with Max. So what if he was slapping himself?

Before he did anything else, he wanted to figure out how to close the prompts, so he tried a few things. First, he lifted his hand, trying to push at the tab with the X. It didn’t work…he noticed more people watching him. “Gah,” he whispered, no longer able to compartmentalize, grumbling about how much he hated when people watched him.

After poking his finger in the air didn’t work, he tried using his whole hand. He tried pulling down from the tab. He tried staring at the X and willing the menu to close. Nothing worked.

Since he couldn’t close the menus, he wondered if he could open his status screen. Once there, he figured he’d find a tutorial. The tutorial would show him how to close windows.

But how could he open his status menu? When he thought about it, a notification appeared.

Open status menu?

Yes, he said in his mind, hoping it would work to open the menu. A new prompt appeared over the last one:

Confirm opening status menu?

“Yes,” he shouted aloud. “YES!” As he shouted, people continued to stare. He looked away from them, and after a short delay, his status menu opened.

His main status screen opened.

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The part about the tree climbing seemed unnecessary to Pete. His low strength stat bothered him, too…and how did he lose two HP? He thought about it for a few seconds, realizing it must have happened when he slapped himself. If he kept slapping himself like that, could he slap himself to death? That would be an awful way to go.

He found the MP stat interesting. It signified he was in a world where magic existed. Where he wasn’t sure what every attribute did, he had a good idea. Strength was his strength.

Dexterity would determine his fine motor skills. In some games, it influenced critical hit rates with all weapons or the accuracy of ranged weapons. He wouldn’t be sure until he got a chance to test it.

Vitality would influence how well he could receive a hit, and it might have a direct impact on his hit points. In some games, it impacted how much stamina a person had. He searched for a stamina bar but didn’t see one. Did this world not have stamina limitations, or was it not a measurable attribute? When he got a chance, he’d have to run and see if he got tired.

Intelligence was self-explanatory. It determined how smart he was. But he suspected it would also regulate his ability to cast spells. Would he be able to learn any spells? He convinced himself he would. After all, he was the hero of the world. He should be able to learn some magic. Where intelligence impacted a spell’s power, spirit related to a person’s spell resistance. That was its traditional purpose.

Agility would impact his speed and reflexes. His balance and stealth skill tied to the stat, too.

When he focused on each equipped item, its bonuses appeared in the blank space to the right of the attributes. Along with the bonuses, he saw a picture of the item.

His Pizza Place polo gave him a plus two defensive bonus. His ring gave him a plus three defense bonus and a plus-three to magic defense. He wondered if the silver in it provided more effective protection. His jeans gave him plus two to his defense. His shoes gave him a plus two. He wondered where his other defense points came from, guessing they tied to VIT and other factors.

His attack stat was more confusing for him to figure out. Each of his bare hands gave him a plus three damage bonus, totaling six. How that jumped to twelve was beyond him.

A scream sounded in the field, pulling his attention away from the menu.