There is a vast world surrounding us. A world that still holds an unmeasurable amount of secrets. So many, in fact, that our very imaginations struggle with its comprehension. There are wonders and horrors we cannot imagine, even after a lifetime of learning and searching. The only thing we apparently become aware of is our lack of knowledge.
What is life? A simple question that echoes through the winding path of human lives. But what is the answer to such a question? Is it love? There was a time I believed it to be so, but that time passed, along with so many other things. That I have lost count of all the things I have lost. If it’s not love, could life be described with a goal to strive for? For a time, maybe…
Those and similar questions are the ones that forever haunt us along the path of crossing the river of life. Most of the time, we have an answer to those questions based on our momentary struggles and desires. An answer that changes along the road, as naturally as the night, is followed by the first rays of dawn. Until the time we inevitably reach the end of our journey and we are reminded of the cruel truth that we are just as clueless about those questions as the day we took our first step.
Is there even a purpose? I wondered as the last of my strength slipped away from my old and battered body… then the darkness after seventy-two years of searching, eventually claimed me.
There was darkness for a while, then the darkness was parted by an ethereal stream of light. The warmth radiating from those purely white rays engulfed me. Before I knew it, my consciousness was traveling through the endless universe with incredible speed. Stars on all sides of my vision blurred past me as the world whirled around its axis.
As the stars blurred into a single continuance, my consciousness snaking through the gaps among the stars. The sight kept reminding me of a river, a silver river of stars.
My mind was in disarray as I tried to understand the implications. I have died; yet my mind remains a whole. It felt sharper than the last few decades of my life. I was sure of it. Above all, death was truly not the end of things. I could hardly ask for a better proof, seeing what I was seeing.
An excited smile filled with anticipation appeared on my face as I gazed in awe at the world from a perspective I could never before experience. Greedily taking in everything, every glint of light, every bit of warmth circling around my body, like a protective layer of mysterious energy.
Then… the speeding universe came to a sudden halt. My eyes fixed at the planet hovering before me, a lonely world surrounded by the dark space. There was a star in the distance and a pair of moons circling the mysterious world. It was a world much like Earth, as it was mostly covered by water, with vast continents that rose above the water level.
Then a voice filled the surrounding vacuum. A firm voice of a man, a voice that felt… amused.
"I heard your strife, soul, far from a distant realm. I decided to answer your plea." — The incorporeal voice spoke to me.
I gasped as I tried to understand what was happening. Alas, no matter how much I tried to come to a reasonable conclusion… The only feasible answer seemed to remain the same. I was talking to a God, a God that had summoned me.
The feelings of warmth followed by a friendly chuckle filled the surrounding space. As if trying to soothe my internal debate.
"I see that you understand the gist of your situation. It’s a curious thing, those fictions your people tend to enjoy in that world of yours, isn’t it? I suspect that some of my brethren have a hand in that… It becomes a bother to explain the same thing repeatedly, after a few eons."
I listened to the words of the being that summoned me. His amusement was clear. As it filled the surrounding space, brimming with playful excitement, filling the emptiness with sparkling energy.
Seeing this, I looked around in awe, but a small part of me started to feel confused. What did this God want from me? He clearly has gone out of his way to bring me here.
"Yes…" — The voice spoke, answering my thoughts in a baleful tone. And the excitement slowly dissipated, letting the darkness take back its territory.
"I brought you here, for a reason as you already expected." — The voice paused for a while, uncertain as if he was trying to find the right words.
"This world you see is called Rixa, a world that is filled with struggle and injustice. It is also a world of magic, filled with many races and even more fantastic beasts. A wondrous plane for a soul such as yours."
I swallowed hearing those words. Could it be that this God intends to reincarnate me into this mystical realm?
Another chuckle echoed through the darkness.
"You are not too far from the truth. It is indeed something I have considered. Unfortunately, we are not in a position to wait for your new body to grow up. Also, I don’t think you would desire such an experience either. Definitely not after those years bound to bed in that hospital." — The voice quietened and a solemn mood took over. I found myself silently agreeing with his words.
"You wanted a purpose in your life before, isn’t that right?" — He questioned, the same amusement in his voice as before just a tad bit more serious.
For the first time, I actually opened my mouth and spoke without him needing to read my mind to get an answer.
"I… yes."
The voice remained silent for a while before speaking again.
"You have searched for a purpose, and you have found many. One was as good as the other, but you were never satisfied with either of them for long. Allow me to ask a question. Would you consider your last life as a purposeless one, or would you consider it as one with many purposes?"
I thought about his words… it was true that I have many times thought that I found a purpose, but with the passing of time, most lost the novelty and the satisfaction it initially provided.
The voice sounded again.
"What is a purpose you wondered? What is the goal of life you asked to this very day? Even on your deathbed. What if I say to you that there isn’t a specific purpose to life, not in the sense you envisioned?"
My eyes widened as I stared into the surrounding emptiness. What does he mean by that?
"Freedom to choose your own purpose, the spark to create new things, a desire to achieve a goal, the sense of fulfillment you feel after climbing another step. To grow wiser on the path. Isn’t doing those things worthy of being a purpose to your life? Why do you desire a God given purpose above all of those things? Isn’t that pure selfishness?"
I opened my mouth, but couldn’t argue with the simple yet powerful logic.
"Your purpose is but the desire to do something. No matter which fancy word you used to describe it. That is why you have always needed to find something to desire, because without desire, there is no life."
"That said, you must also realize that the path to your desire is much more important than the goal itself. Yet you have allowed it to blind you, an unfortunate mistake."
Silence filled the surrounding space. As I thought through the words of the mysterious being. A chuckle much like his coming to me at the realization.
"… Did I overthink it after all?"
The voice spoke chidingly.
"That is one way to put it, and it is not necessarily a bad thing or rare. After all, life is so many things, at the same time. It’s a lot similar to a river in its intrinsic workings. Your way of trying to understand it is like pointing at a fish in the water and stating that the fish is the river. When only a fool wouldn’t know that that particular fish is but a small insignificant part of what we call a river."
"As the fish can’t leave the water to look at it with the eyes of humans. Destined to think of the river as the entire world. So humans can’t step away from the borders that contain their lives to look at it with the eyes of a God."
This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.
"Only mortals would even attempt to describe life’s meaning in such simple phrases." — Another chuckle buzzed through the world, as God continued his monologue. — "Alas, that doesn’t matter anymore, since I have decided to give you the purpose you longed for."
"What?" — The question broke out of my throat, as it felt entirely unexpected after such an introduction.
"The world you see in front of you is one of my original creations. It has served as an inspiration to my creation, mine and those of who I have created. A world that I have grown quite fond of over the passing of the ages. That is why I have decided to lend you a fraction of my power and send you to this plane as my chosen. A divine messenger, so to speak."
I was overwhelmed by the new information God dumped on me so abruptly.
"Wait, a second! Divine messenger? Me? You must be joking, my lord? You mentioned your brethren previously. Why don’t you ask one of them to help you out? I am nothing special, especially not someone destined to be a divine messenger. And even if I am… What is the problem in this world that I am supposed to solve, or what message should I bring?"
The Godly being completely ignored my attempt to dissuade him.
"There is a growing darkness in this realm, a plague that threatens to consume all that I created. I send you as an aid to guide the races of my realm under a single banner. In an attempt to banish the darkness."
That’s… well, that’s quite the standard trope, but how am I supposed to do that?
Another amusing chuckle sounded as the voice of God answered.
"Well, that remains to be seen, isn’t it? Even a creator cannot foresee every action of his creations and that is how it should be."
"You will call me Axis. It is the name of your patron and the original creator of this realm. From now on, your name shall be Selora. I will remake your body as a white elf, a race believed to be extinct. It is also one with a natural longevity that rivals the Gods themselves. Your title shall be Witch of the Silver River. May it remind you of your origin, that you come from the other end of the universe."
My initially excited smile turned into a wry one as a sense of awkwardness filled the surrounding space.
"… I must have misheard it… Selora, you say? It sounds quite feminine… since it’s elven it must be a cultural difference, right? And what do you mean by witch?"
Awkward silence followed my questions.
"…There is a popular prophecy in the land that God’s chosen will appear in times of great strife. She will come in the form of a white elven woman from a race long thought extinct. Wielding mystical powers. She will come from a distant realm bringing the promise of hope."
I listened to the words attentively, feeling a growing sense of discomfort.
"The original prophecy was entirely made up by a bunch of miscreant priests that desperately tried to bolster the morale of their troops. They could never foresee how successful their deceit was. Nor did they live long enough to see its effects on the world. One thing led to another, and the prophecy was highly regarded all over the civilized realms. You see, even a God can’t ignore such an opportunity, and I decided to use it for my plans, making you appear exactly like the prophecy described you. This will no doubt provide immense help to your task."
Another awkward pause later, I blurted out.
"That’s… all fine and good… but I am a man… though."
"No, you are not." — The being stated between a snort and a chuckle.
I was speechless.
There was an unusually long and awkward silence following my statement, but before I could speak again, the world blurred around me, my consciousness drifting away, along with my unanswered questions and fears.
Somewhere underground on the planet of Rixa, a powerful magical anomaly occurs. White lightning dances in a few meter wide perfect circle. Carving out the uneven rock surface and dissipating it into the air. The white magical lightning slowly began to form a humanlike form. Flesh, bones and veins were growing rapidly into a singular entity seemingly made out of thin air at the command of a being far exceeding that of mortal minds.
The entire process took but a few minutes, and the roaring thunder that kept the dark realm awake disappeared just as suddenly as it arrived. Only the powerful echo of the continuous thunder strikes were still lingering in the underground cave system.
Well, that and the humanoid figure standing in the epicenter of the anomaly.
There stood a pale-skinned elven maiden. A petite thing, with silk like black hair flowing down her shoulders. A small face, with sharp yet tender facial features unique to the elven races, favored for their peerless beauty. A pair of elongated ears pointing upwards at a mild angle encircling a pair of pure silver eyes reminding those who caught sight of them of the twin moons of Rixa.
The girl was looking around the cave with a scandalized expression.
There was a long staff in her hand made of a silvery material that seemed to passively exude a silver light that pushed back the darkness surrounding her on all sides. Her body was covered in a thick gray robe decorated with silvery embroidery, likely made from a similar material as the rod. The robe was reaching down to her knees. Parts of it were covered in heavy chain-mail to provide even more protection to the mysterious wearer.
Otherwise, she was wearing dark gray long gloves and tall boots tightly wrapped around her limbs. There was also a cowl skillfully sewn to the back of her robe, allowing her to protect her head from the whims of nature if necessary.
The next time I opened my eyes, I was standing in the middle of a dark and eery cave. My head hurt, and I felt confused and lost. I tried to remember how I got here, or what I was doing here at least… Then the memories of my meeting with Lord Axis flooded my mind and I slowly calmed down, attempting to get a firm hand on my spiking emotions.
Yes, I have met a God, a God that chose me as his messenger. He entrusted me with the task of gathering the races of this realm and defeating the darkness that threatens its continued existence. It was a mission of great importance, also serving as the purpose behind my existence here.
That was one thing… then the prophecy came to mind, and I shuddered.
I looked down at my body. I was covered in a typical mage robe. Nothing extreme, if you disregard the patches of chain mail that covered certain areas providing extra layers of defense against physical attacks. There was a moderately sized backpack hanging from my shoulders, its straps pulled over my coat.
That wasn’t what bothered me, though.
My eyes ticked in frustration as I caught sight of the long black hair flowing over my shapely breasts covered under the gray robe’s material. An unfamiliar tight sensation surrounding my chest. Is that how wearing a bra feels? This is getting ridiculous…
I felt like cursing, but held back, too scared to actually do it. I was supposed to be some sort of divine messenger… Seriously, I just met with an actual God and got recreated by him, with a mission in mind. I wasn’t eager to figure out how it might react to such blasphemous acts. I had a feeling that it wouldn’t just endure it in silence like the ones back on Earth did. Those guys must have been burned out already.
"Ugh…" — I sighed heavily, leaning on the metal staff that was already in my hand when I came to be. I almost jumped from the sound of my voice, looking around the cave like a fool before realizing what was going on.
It was too damn different from what I was used to. This was the voice of a girl, no, an elf-girl. It felt soft to my ears, filled with an inner warmth and a sense of power, which I couldn’t quite capture at the moment. Could it have something to do with me being a witch, of all things?
Still… among all the strange experiences, I kept glancing around the cold and dark cave, seeing nothing familiar, just darkness and the occasional outlines of rocky walls. Slowly, I began to feel a sense of despair.
"Seriously… as if turning me into a girl wasn’t enough… he had to drop me into a cave completely alone without any sign of nearby civilization… Its not like this world is peaceful, from what he told me it is much more dangerous than Earth was even back in the middle ages."
The girl sighed, sitting down on top of a nearby rock, trying to think over her situation.
"Come on Selora… think… you have the experience of a whole life you can surly figure something out… wait…"
Since when did I start to refer to myself as Selora so naturally? My name was… ugh? I can’t remember? Is.. is this the Alzheimer's disease I heard of? No-no-no-no-no… that can’t be. I have been reborn as a young girl. There is no way… Let’s calm down for now… yes. I clearly know that I was an old man, and died on my hospital bed… but, how is it that I can’t recall my name? What the hell?! Everything else seems to be alright… At least I can’t find anything unusual going on with my memory. But if that is the case, then it doesn’t make sense!
"How could this be? I can’t recall my old name…" — I spoke up in sheer frustration. My left leg was shaking with excess energy. Then a sudden thought came to me as I mumbled to myself, with a dazed look in my eyes. — "This, this must be the will of Lord Axis… well, if that is the case, it should be fine."
My thoughts cleared, and I froze as the words left my mouth without my intention.
I jumped up with an inexplicable rage filling my chest.
"Like hell is that fine!" — I shrieked into the darkness, shaking my head frantically while walking up and down in the dull cave, attempting to work out my annoyance with the general situation. — "This guy clearly messed with my head and didn’t even warn me ahead of it… not even talking about my body! He obviously did it intentionally just to frustrate me! Damn it!"
The girl stomped her feet in a futile act of defiance. Alas, nobody was there to bear witness to her anger, and so it quickly dissipated. As a result, she slumped down back against the rock she was sitting on just now. Feeling empty.
Why am I acting like a pompous child? I am such an idiot. Being a girl is the least of my problems. It might be uncomfortable at first, but the momentary discomfort is nothing compared to the discomfort of being dead. Above all, I am a white elf. That means I won’t ever die from natural death, nor will I get old if I can believe what Lord Axis said. He has given me such incredible longevity, and I was picking at the details, acting like a complete idiot.
I felt like crying as the realization dawned on me. This was a literal God I was talking about, one that was clearly capable of retribution, and wasn’t likely to allow such disrespect without punishment.
I crawled to my knees and prayed from my heart, driven by fear and shame in equal portions. I was pleading to my Lord to forgive my foolish behavior.
It didn’t take long until I felt a peaceful and accepting aura surround me. The relief that filled my soul was like a bite of fresh bread to a starving man. My tense body relaxed, knowing that my prayers had been accepted, and I was granted forgiveness. Just like that… It was beautiful in its simplicity.
My face flushed, and soon enough tears began to run down my cheeks as I was overcome with my emotions.
"My Lord… you are too kind… thank you. Thank you so much… for your generosity."