As my barked commands washed over her, Jax rose to her feet limply, like a marionette being pulled from a steamer trunk. And though she stood, though her axe materialized in her hand, her head hung from her shoulders as a disconnected thing, still sobbing uncontrollably. When the first rat hit her, she stumbled, taken by surprise. Whether it was from the tears blurring her vision or just the simple lack of light, she could barely see to react, but when its teeth sank into her flesh, she screamed and, twisting, threw the thing into the wall.
I do not know if she killed it or had even really injured it, but she did not follow up. She merely staggered in place, barely even acknowledging that anything had happened, her axe limp in her hand. Before I could so much as blink, a second had leapt to her hunched back and began tearing at her shoulders. That was the first time I got a real look at what we were facing.
I could not tell you what color they were, if they had markings, or much of any real significance. But they were big. Before even factoring in the tail, these things were as long as a man’s forearm and easily three times as thick. To call them rats was like calling a mountain lion a house cat. And as I quickly glanced out into the tunnels, I could see more of them coming. Dozens perhaps. It was hard to tell in the dim light. All I could see were furry waves undulating towards us as they came.
Jax’s arm lifelessly reached up and speared her attacker with her claws, ripping it off her shoulder in a spray of blood. She barely flinched as the thing’s claws tore at her to keep purchase, and slamming it into the ground, her axe quickly followed, descended with a sickening thud. And as she lifted it overhead for a second swing, two more of the creatures barreled into her. She had not even attempted to dodge. Rather, she almost seemed to embrace them as they came.
As she fell back, she released her axe and instead tore into them with her claws. Yet as she traced lines of blood into their flesh, her head lolled back, almost like she was exposing her throat to them.
What the hell is she doing? It was like watching a sick animal fight. There was no skill involved, only base instinct and simple reactions to pain.
Falling back from their weight, she turned as they went to the ground and crushed them beneath her. She made no effort to move, though she continued ravaging them as they squirmed to escape. At least until a third tore into her ankle.
Shit, she’s getting torn apart. Hastily, I summoned my regeneration spell to mind, and remembering the difficulties of it, I carefully let the Words spill into the world.
As her axe reformed mid-air, descending to cleave the rat at her feet in twain, my spell gently began to reknit her flesh, and she gasped. It was as if she suddenly remembered where she was and what she was doing. And she rejected it. “No! Don’t! I do nay deserve yer Life. Let them have me, Donum!” her voice broke as she spoke.
“What are you talking about?” I shouted. “Fight! Fight or we’ll die!”
Three more rats ran up to replace the one she had just slain. One grabbed her wrist, yanking it away from the handle of her axe which dissolved away. She barely took heed of it, and simply pulled the thing into her teeth, jerking it about like a dog with a rabbit. But then another slammed into her torso, and she went down again.
I took a step forward to help her, momentarily forgetting myself, and the third turned immediately. My eyes widened as I realized my mistake, and the rat ran for me. Stumbling back, I lost sight of it in the shadows for an instant, and out of a combination of panic and instinct, I ducked. I never saw what happened, but suddenly, I heard something smash into the wall behind me and tumble to the ground. Frantically, I scanned for it, but it was lost to the darkness. I just had to hope that it had knocked itself out.
Sparing a glance for Jax, she had separated herself from the two most recent attackers and regained her feet, but she was merely staggering around and blindly swinging about herself with her claws. “Damn it, Jax! Summon your axe! Fight for real!” I shouted.
“No!” she yelled back even as the axe reformed in her hand. “I do nay want to live no more! I be a monster! A monster in life and a monster now. I do nay deserve to be yer lilim!”
“What…” I started, but a searing pain lanced up my calf as my unseen assailant latched onto me from behind. With a yelp, I collapsed.
“Donum!” Jax cried, and she ran for me.
I was lying on my back, desperately kicking with my free leg to dislodge the thing from my ankle, when Jax arrived and, screaming, lopped the thing’s head from its shoulders. Chest heaving and trying to get my breath back under control, I looked up and our eyes met. I could only discern the faintest of glimmers there, but even then I could see the tears pouring from her. She was breaking. I had to do something. I had to give her something to hold on to or we would both be torn apart.
And it pissed me the fuck off. “By the Watcher’s Black Eye, Jax!” I yelled at the top of my lungs as I staggered to my feet. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw another of the bastards coming for us, and I kicked it away savagely. “Who the fuck said anything about ‘deserve’? Did the victims of you and your old pals deserve to get what you gave them? Un-fucking-likely. Rat!” I pointed. Jax mindlessly spun and started swinging blindly at the thing, but it skipped back into a shadow and she lost sight of it.
“Did you deserve to be forced into a life of banditry by some Goddess whose Laws you barely even understand? Debatable. Did you… there!” The thing jumped at her, getting under her swing, and she had to abandon her axe again for tooth and claw. The two of them went down in a snarling mess, rolling over each other in a fight for dominance.
I continued yelling over them, “Did you deserve to be born to a whore who cast you into the streets? Did you deserve to have to fight for survival your whole life just for your next scrap of bread?”
She finally threw the thing off of her, and it skidded to a stop next to me. Taking a breath from my tirade, I stomped down on its head to pin it in place so that she could finish it. “And did I deserve to be dropped into this Goddess forsaken hellhole having to fight for my fucking life every fucking day? No, no, and abso-fucking-lutely not! Now… Shit!” my eyes widened as another writhing mass of them skidded around the corner. At my shout, Jax swung around, jerking her axe free from her victim at my feet and taking a hesitant stance in front of me.
She managed all of one swing before she was taken to the ground. I could not count how many of them were on her. It was too dark, and they were moving too fast. All I could see was claws flashing and fur flying and hear the screams of the wounded, both of lilim and beast. Quickly centering myself again, I pushed out another regeneration spell in the hopes that it would keep her alive long enough to get through this, and my stomach tightened in warning. That Life infusion from earlier had not given me much, and her ability had yet to proc again so far.
Quickly casting about for another way to help, my eyes landed on the corpse lying underfoot, and I grabbed it up by the tail. Swinging it overhead like a morbid flail, I started laying about Jax with it, smashing body to dead body in an attempt to give her enough breathing room to get the upper hand.
“There is no ‘deserve’, Jax!” I yelled as I swung. “There is just life! Life and what we choose to do with it! Now get your ass up!” I said as I bashed the last one spinning into the darkness.
Shakily, she got to her knees. She was bleeding heavily even as her flesh continued to knit itself together from my spell. She showed no visible signs of pain or pleasure, only looking up at me. Finally, she whispered, “But I almost raped ye. Donum, I be an evil thing. Cursed and cast out. Ye be better off without me.”
I closed my eyes for a moment and sighed. I could still hear more out there. We had seconds at best. I needed to be done with this. “Maybe you did. Maybe you didn’t. We can debate that some other time.” Reaching down, I grasped her hand and hauled her to her feet. “And maybe you were evil. You’ve definitely seen it. You’ve certainly done it. But…” I clasped a hand to her shoulder, “Now at least you know what to look for. Now at least you know it when you see it. Now you can avoid it! Now you can fight it! Now you can be wiser! Now you can be better. Be better, Jax! Be better for me! Be my lilim! And I will be those things for you! Together, we will survive! And maybe, one day, you might deserve forgiveness!”
A long few seconds passed then. She just stared at me, slowly breathing. In the dim light, her expression was unreadable, so I could not tell if what I said had helped at all. But just as I was about to try again, she opened her mouth to speak.
“Be better. Be better for ye. Be yer lilim,” she repeated back in a whisper. The words were dull, robotic things spilling from her mouth.
I realized then, that in my attempt to quickly cobble together some kind of motivational rhetoric, I had momentarily forgotten myself and lapsed into a commanding tone. “Oh… no, Jax, I only meant…” I began, but she quickly clapped her hand over my mouth.
“Be better. Be better for ye. Be yer lilim,” she said again, louder, with more conviction.
Quickly, I jerked back and tried again, “Jax, no! I didn’t mean to…”
She jumped to follow me and forcefully brought both of her hands to my lips again to stop me. “No! I want it!” she cried, her voice still breaking with emotion. “Do nay take it away! I will be better! I will be better for ye! I be yer lilim, Donum!”
My eyebrows knitted together in concern as we held each other’s eyes for another precious second. Finally, in frustration, I pushed her back, “Fine!” Sparing an eye for the path ahead, I could see more of them gathering, preparing for the next assault. If whatever I had said was giving her something to latch onto, then I would accept it, no matter that it had been unintentional. Getting out of here alive was priority one. Plus, ‘better’ was an awfully broad concept, she could interpret it in a great many ways. If there was anything negative about it, it did not occur to me in the moment. I just did not have time to think. “Fine. But we will talk about this later!”
“As ye wish, Donum,” she said, spinning to face the onrushing mob. As the light of her materializing axe briefly illuminated her face, I saw a renewed expression of determination there. “Yer lilim stands ready!”
They were on us in an instant. Dozens of them. All at once.
But true to her word, Jax was ready to fight. Quickly skipping to the side as the first of the pack came for her, her axe slashed once. Twice. And as many were slain. But before their life had even finished falling to the ground, four more replaced them. She could not hold so many. It was impossible.
However, this time, she was fighting for real, ready to bring all of her weapons to bear. Hastily ducking into the darkness to break their line of sight, they hesitated just long enough for her axe to take another. Beyond that, I could not see. Too much was happening all at once, and most of it was obscured from me.
Taking a breath, I cast about for how I could help. I still held my improvised flail by the tail, but if I moved now, I would promptly be overwhelmed. As for spells, I had two. My heal and one for stealth. Stealth, I figured, would probably do us little good just now, but technically, the thing was called ‘Fortunate Shadows’. And we could use a bit of luck.
Bringing the Words to mind, I carefully went over them a few times before making my attempt. Even then, I still fumbled twice before I got it out. I had yet to get as much practice with this one as with the heal. As the last syllable escaped my lips, the heavy shadows surrounding us slowly bent, trying to keep the two of us obscured even as it denied the rats the same. It helped a little.
Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
Jax briefly dove through a faint ray of light, swinging her axe in a crescent as she did. A rat shrieked as its blood was violently forced to mimic the display, and Jax landed somewhere in the now moving darkness. But when it passed, she was nowhere to be seen. I grinned. She was using the shadows to her advantage, bringing her fighting style into play. Finally.
Just then, one of the rats passed close enough to me to see through my personal field of forgetfulness, and it hissed at me in surprise. I sucked in a breath as I prepared myself for the ensuing pandemonium defending myself would no doubt bring down on me, but before I could even step back, her axe appeared out of nowhere, flying through the air and taking the rat with it. She must have sensed my panic and reacted in an instant. I was gobsmacked. She was really taking this ‘be better’ business to heart.
Unfortunately, when the axe dissolved and flashed back into her hand, the light of the effect gave away her position. “Ugh… fuck. Got a howlin’ lavvy fer a head, I do.”
The rats reacted instantly, coming for her en masse. She continued to cut them down, but from her screams and cursing, she was starting to be overrun.
“Do you need healing?” I yelled. I could not see a damned thing, even with the shadows trying their best to help us out. There was just too much darkness and too little light.
“No, save it!” she called back, sending a rat to sail past my head and crack against the stonework behind me. I was sorely tempted to follow its path, but I determinedly held still. “Wait until I can get this ruddy bag of a skill to work. Ye can nay spare the Life, yet! Arrgh, fucker!” Her axe was briefly illuminated by a trace of light as it swung down to punish her attacker, but it jumped clear. “Come back here, ye minced scrote!”
I winced a bit. Clearly, my little command had not cleaned up her language at all. Unless, of course, she had gone the other direction and decided she should get better at cursing. I grimaced at the thought. Yeah… that would be just like her, too.
One of the rats I had not seen must have gotten behind her, because suddenly, she yelped and stumbled into the light, hopelessly trying to get it off by grabbing at it with her claws before giving it up and simply falling back on it. Three more jumped on her before she could so much as sit up again.
“Try to moan, Jax!” I called out. “Use your shadows to distract them!”
“Uhhaaargh! Shite pile of a roaster’s gizzard!” she cursed as one of them bit her right on one of her still budding breasts. I will not describe what she did to it in retaliation. “The fuck am I supposed to get in the mood with these sacks o’ rotted bile chewin’ at me?!” she yelled after spitting bits of now dead rat from her mouth.
Pale and slightly nauseated, I had to admit, that was a very good point. Pain was quite the buzz kill. At best, she could try to fake it, but we had seen the lackluster clones that resulted in. Still, they would be better than nothing. I was about to suggest she at least make the effort when one of her claws pierced the eye of a rat that had been trying to get to her neck as she rolled on the ground. That kill finally triggered another of her Life stealing infusions, and we gasped at the sudden rush of new energy.
Jax hugged the drained rat to herself and moaned, perhaps a little more than she really felt, but a nice and dark clone fell away from her all the same. She took the opportunity to roll into a slowly approaching patch of darkness while some half of her attackers went for her double. It dissolved quickly, but seeing her regain some breathing room helped me to relax just enough to get an idea. It was… a little sketchy, but it might help.
“Jax, I’m about to heal you. But before I do, I’m going to give you a command. Not a permanent one, just for now. I don’t really…”
“Will ye shut up and be on about it!” she yelled, interrupting me. A rat descended swiftly to the floor from out of the shadows, like it was attached to the end of a rope. But when it bounced, I saw her hand come loose of the thing’s jaws. “If it helps me kill rats, then I be over the fuckin’ moon!”
Fair enough. I needed to follow my own advice. Live first. Worry about morals later.
“Alright, then! Hear this and obey!” I yelled, taking a breath to assemble the command in my mind. “My heals give you pleasure, and I know you enjoy it. But before you can be healed, you must be injured. And with injury, there is pain. To earn that pleasure, you must feel pain. Pain is a signal for you. It means there will be pleasure. That meaning will build in you. It makes your heart race! It makes your skin flush! It arouses you! And the more pain you feel, the more anticipation will build for the pleasure to come. Obey!”
I had no idea if that would actually work, but if she was going to use her shadows in combat effectively, she was going to need something like it. Closing my eyes, I began assembling the promised spell, having to drop the other to concentrate.
“The fuck, Donum?” she said, almost laughing despite being nearly blind and heavily injured. “Yer bum’s out the window if yer thinkin’ I can suddennnaah~,” she was cut short as my follow up heal started to take hold. Several clones skipped through the light as she readily embraced the ecstasy coursing through her, using it to gain a moment of breathing room. Maybe her skill was improving, but to my eyes, the shadows seemed to be trying to avoid the jaws of the many rats, and they darted about in confusion as they chased the patches of darkness around, trying to bring them low.
From my vantage in the deep shadows, it looked like an anthill had been kicked over. As they juked this way and that, almost faster than I could keep track of, I realized that there could have been twenty rats in here with us as easily as there were five. They were just too fast. Soon enough though, Jax dove into the middle of them, waving her axe about like a maniac despite the spell being as yet unfinished and clutching her still injured hand to her chest. She was determined to use the confusion to take out as many as she could.
As the first shadow blinked out of existence, I realized her advantage was going to be short lived. I had to keep going. Keep thinking.
Briefly, I debated whether to recast Fortunate Shadows or just enter the fray myself. I did not think I could do both — I was still a bit out of breath from holding it the first time. What is more, the spell had not even helped all that much, and though I would likely get torn to shreds, if I started to fight, at least there would be another warm body out there to help spread the rat’s attention. She had stopped summoning new shadows, after all. Either my command had not worked or it needed some time to build.
As I stood there, wrestling with indecision, it suddenly occurred to me that I had yet to spend my skill point. That was it! A new spell had the potential to turn the tide… but what to pick? It was far too open of a question for me to think about clearly in the here and now.
“Jax! I can buy a spell!” I called out. “What do you need? Don’t think! What do you need right now?”
“Ha!” Jax yelled visciously as she brought her axe down yet again. She was panting roughly, getting slower as the fight drew out. “By Mercy’s Hand, the fuck do I know, Donum?” she retorted, throwing another rat off of her. She moved to finish it, but it was lost to her in the darkness. “Bloody roasted dripping fud! Be fuckin’ nice to see fer once!”
See. See. Right, that was good. It was simple. Basic. And undoubtedly helpful. Without thinking about it further than that, I whispered my prayer, “Lady Bline. Hear me. I need a spell. I need a spell to turn the tide of this battle. I need a spell so that we can live. Please. Give me something good so that we can see our foes!”
Her reply was quick, like she had only been waiting for me to ask.
Unclothe the Darkness
Modifier for [Active Skill: Fortunate Shadows]. May be joined to the spell to add [Light Tracing] to its effect. Raises overall endurance cost to maintain. Effectiveness and cost improve with skill level. May be cast independently by including first Word of base Skill.
I did not bother to read it beyond the name. It was… a bit suggestive, but that was becoming par for the course. I would have to take it on faith that She had not screwed me over with this. “Yes. I’ll take it. Thank you.”
The Words came to my ears quickly this time, almost as if they were anxious for me to hear them, unwilling to spare the time for the usual pageantry. As they settled into my consciousness, I had a moment of panic as their use came to me. In order to activate it, I had to add it to the end of Fortunate Shadows. I was not sure what it would do, but it would essentially be like casting two spells at the same time. And then holding them.
First, though, I had to actually cast the damned thing, and from the unidentifiable Words now tumbling through my brain, it had at least doubled in length. “Alright, Jax. Hold on. I’ve got… a thing,” I called out to warn her, but she and her clones had disappeared into the black somewhere. I could still hear her just fine, though.
“Fuckin’ hurry, whatever yer gonna do!” she shouted. “I’m gettin’ me… Ow! Ye little…” she giggled a bit, “That… that were naughty. I’ll have to punish ye fer that one, ye blighter.”
The aforementioned rat briefly entered my view, sailing across the small band of light to smack against the far wall. Her axe followed it in short order, and I heard a pained squeal as it struck home. I was not sure exactly where that teasing tone had come from, but the extreme violence that followed it made my brain skip a beat. However, when the weapon reformed in her hand, I got a brief glimpse of her. She was fighting tooth and nail but with an odd sort of expression on her face. It seemed caught somewhere between anger, pain, exhaustion, and… something.
Whatever it was, I did not have the time to think about it. Giving my head a quick shake, I prepared myself. I ran the spell through my mind once. Twice. And nodded. Taking a breath, I began. The first part came fairly quickly, but as more Words came, I stumbled. It was like I had been practicing a simple tongue twister and then suddenly been asked to recite it again but backwards on the fly. I grit my teeth. The longer I took to do this, the worse off we would be.
“Ack! Blighted melter!” Wham! Clang! “That… Hmm… That ain’t fer you to be bitin’!” She almost sounded drunk. Perhaps from blood loss?
I blinked a few times, distracted as a Jax shaped shadow and several rats passed by. I quirked an eyebrow as realization came. Maybe that command was doing something, after all. Good. She needed to use those shadows. But I could not think about that. Centering myself, I tried again.
I started quickly, wanting to get to the meat of it, but I stuttered on the third syllable. “Fah! Shitballs,” I swore.
“Any day now, Donum,” Jax said, almost in a teasing tone. “And maybe… Rahha ha ha! Mmmmh! Oh, you fucker!” Jax and one of her clones briefly rolled into the light, taking the time to rip at the offender with her bare claws. She quickly darted away, leaving it there to bleed out, while her shadow went the other way. “Maybe when yer done, I could use another heal. These things are tryin’ to fell me like a tree, they are.”
I frowned, the spell fizzling in my mind. “What do you want first? Light or healing? I can only do one at a time!”
“Uh… Ow!” she sucked in a breath. “Mercy… me nipples be tight’ah~ I…” Clang! “Light, I guess. I can nay see… Mmm, Donum… I can nay see to fight… fer yeee…” She was starting to get a breathy tone to her voice, and it was beginning to do things to my anatomy that was entirely unhelpful in this situation. I shook my head once to get my head back on straight, but one of her shadows breezed past me, gently caressing my cheek. “Do nay fight it, Donum!” she called. “It feeds me. Gives me strength to keep…” she paused, “I… I be sorry, Donum. I were doin’ it again. I got no right…”
“It’s fine, Jax,” I said, quickly interrupting her. The last thing I needed was for her to break down again. “If it keeps your strength up, it’s fine. You have my permission. Just wait until I cast this spell. It’s distracting!”
I did not wait for her reply, though I heard her groan of disappointment. Instead, I closed my eyes in an effort to shut everything out and started again. This time, it was a measured, deliberate affair. Each syllable was delivered with the halted punctuation of a hammer slamming a bent nail into timber. But I did it. The spell was cast. And it settled on me like a sandbag on a jogger running uphill. Weak kneed from the weight of it, I opened my eyes… to a new world.
The shadows had come to life again, struggling to keep Jax within them and deny the rats the same, just like before. However, now there was something else. White lines of light were everywhere, tracing the outlines of everything I could see… and could not. Where the shadows were the deepest, the lines were brighter. It was as if someone had come down and inscribed the world with a phosphorescent pencil just for me. And brightest of all were the rats. And Jax. Every time anything moved, their outlines surged, as if they were constantly having to be redrawn. It drew the eye like a magnet.
Jax reacted to the spell like she had been struck a blow and jumped back, “Donum, what be this? I ain’t never…” Suddenly a rat leapt for her. I could not see a whisker of it in the darkness save for its outline. Jax reacted instantly, snatching it out of the air and disemboweling it with a quick swipe of her claws. She stared at it for a moment as its struggles slowed in her grip, and abruptly realizing what was going on, she smiled malevolently, “Ah… I see ye now, bag draggers.”
The fight took on a completely different tone after that. The rats were much more at home here in these dark tunnels than we were and had been using it to their advantage. Wounded and injured ones had been slinking off to rest as others came to take their place. They would hide in wait for Jax to pass them by and then leap at her when she was least expecting it. Now, though, the rules had changed. Jax could hide in the deepest shadows and wait for them to search her out. With my spell up, if she moved slowly, the darkness would even follow her, maintaining her advantage. And even when the rats managed to avoid her strikes, they could no longer hide.
The battle was over. It was only a matter of time.