I never expected that my first camping trip would be inside a classroom to say the least.

We had managed to set up the tents for the night after an early dinner, so other than marshmallows that I had obtained during the test, we pretty much didn’t have much to do.

I had found a rather old gym jacket in my office that I had worn back in my first year. It was quite convenient for me, considering that the rest of the club was also wearing a similar physical education jacket.

While settling in outside our tents, all eyes were on me.

“Did I do something?” I looked around.

“I don’t know” Yuki hugged onto a small teddy bear which she had named Guuma-chan, “Rii-san and Kurumi were looking at you so I did the same”

“C’mon, it’s camping. Let’s not get worried over something unless it’s that important”

Yuki gave a short nod before glancing at the nearby lamp.

“... This has some atmosphere!” Yuki looked over at Kurumi, “What do you want to talk about?”

“Horror stories are a must,” Yuuri mentioned.

“Eh, that might suit the mood, but–”

“Not a chance!” Kurumi leaned forward.

“Are you scared–” I felt a sharp whack over my head, “Ouch”

Kurumi could dish out quite a blow.

“Let’s talk about something cheerful!” Kurumi interrupted, “Like a love story!”

“Ah, I just remembered something pretty scary…” Yuki stared at the mattress.

“What?” Kurumi reached for her shovel.

“Wait! It’s not like that!” Yuki extended her teddy bear towards her.

“Huh?”

“I mean, we’re graduating sooner or later, right?”

“... Yeah?”

“But…” Yuki stared down with a solemn expression, “Will Megu-nee be at school forever?”

“Teachers can’t graduate from school, you know?”

“When I start thinking like that, I just feel sad” Yuki squeezed onto the teddy bear.

“I understand that feeling well, ‘cause she’s a good teacher” Yuuri chimed in.

“Right, this club wouldn’t be around without her” Kurumi rested her shovel.

“True, she’s kind… but her lessons are boring” Yuki gave out a more joyful expression.

“She gives us a lot of homework”.

“And often makes mistakes on the board” Yuuri placed her hand close to her mouth, giving out a smirk.

“Sensei also is a bit pushy, but I don’t mind…”

After a short pause, I slid forward, patting on Yuki’s shoulder out of comfort before whispering to her ear.

“Listen Yuki, Megu-nee doesn’t live in this school for the entirety of her life. She was once a student just like you. One day, when you’re older, you’ll be able to meet Megu-nee. And she will be proud of what you’ve become”

“Thanks, Ryu…” Yuki exchanged smiles with me.

“A bit lovey dovey hm?” Kurumi gave a smug expression at the both of us.

“Are you jealous or something?” I turned over.

“Why would I be?” Kurumi rolled her eyes.

“Nevermind” I stuffed my hands around my pocket, only to pull out a small piece of paper, “Hm?”

It was quite the treasure I had laying around my pockets. Just a picture of me and Hano back in Middle School painting. To be honest, it was probably one of the only pictures I had of me and Hano together. As when she recorded her art sessions, I played as the cameraman.

At that point, I had noticed that my smile in the picture was considerably different than what it is now.

“Oh? What’s that?” Kurumi leaned forward.

“Just an old picture”

“Lemme see!” Yuki butted her head with Kurumi before glancing over, “Wow! Is that your girlfriend?”

“Just an old friend of mine, Hano Aki”

“Ohh! That one girl from middle school?”

“She looks so beautiful compared to how I remembered” Yuuri looked at the picture, nodding.

I had noticed that Kurumi gave a sorrowful expression in the meantime.

“C’mon Kurumi, it’s all in the past” I emitted a smile, “Let’s not ruin our night over it”

“Right” She glanced over at the picture, “Wow… you and her do look like a school couple”

“Heh…” I smiled, “We were probably too young to consider it”

“Of course” Kurumi rolled her eyes again, “Where’d you get that picture?”

“Just an old jacket. I was probably in a rush for something”

“No wonder why it doesn’t fit you. Why would you have a picture in there though?”

“Perhaps I wanted to have it over my scrapbook but forgot about it when she left”

“Where does Hano go now?” Yuki looked at me.

“I don’t know… perhaps Tokyo? Her parents travel a lot to work so I haven’t gotten into contact with her”

“Who knows! Perhaps she could transfer here soon! She couldn’t have just left this place without saying goodbye or missing you!”

I felt a sort of unease upon hearing Yuki’s response.

“C’mon Yuki-chan, it's quite rare Hano would come back”

“Yea…” Kurumi glanced at me, “It’d be awkward for Ryu especially”

“I wouldn’t mind”

“Did you still keep in contact with her when she left?” Yuuri glanced at the picture again.

“Nope. She wasn’t really an electronics type so it was almost impossible for her to meet after COVID”

“I do remember her struggling to navigate her online meetings” She gave a giggle, “I hope she’s holding up well”

“Well… I did talk with Kurumi-san about this, but uh…” I glanced over to Kurumi, “Could you do me a favor please?”

“Sure”

“I left a book by my office and I’m not exactly the quietest person” I gave a short awkward chuckle, “Perhaps you and Yuki come over and retrieve it?”

“Wait, why can’t you do it?”

“Because if Sakura-sensei finds me, we’d probably be in trouble”

“Fine” Kurumi grabbed her shovel, “Let’s go Yuki”

“Okay” Yuki left Guuma-chan on the floor.

As the door slid closed, I turned over to Yuuri.

“You often met Hano before in art class, right?”

“Yea, I still remember when you once bumped into her and cause a small mess in the art room”

It wasn’t surprising she remembered that.

“Good times…”

“Is she holding up okay now?”

Great…. Now I have to admit it.

“You remember when Hano-chan was bullied during her final year of Middle School?”

“Of course”

“You see, I failed to try and protect her from it since I was too busy… and uh…”

“Hm?”

“She…” I kept on stuttering.

I couldn’t muster up the words to say it towards her.

“Did she… take her own life?” Yuuri interrupted.

My pause only reinforced her assumption.

“How did you know?”

“I once heard you mentioning it… during the incident at the festival”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Wouldn’t it be impolite to make such a guess?”

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“... Of course”

“I’m so sorry for your loss, Ryu” Yuuri rubbed her hand over my shoulder.

“It’s alright” I gave a small smile,

“Do you still think about her?”

“Probably everyday” I leaned back on my chair, “I really wish I could see her smile again. Heck, even play with an imaginary self of her if it means making me remember the good times”

Yuuri stayed silent, unable to say anything.

“Could you please do me a favor Yuuri-san?”

“Always”

“I will mention her from time to time. But could you please work with me and try to divert the conversation about it? I don’t want to talk about it but I can’t simply tell Yuki straight up like you”

Yuuri gave a nod.

“So was that the reason why you’ve always been distant?”

“Of course” I adjusted the lamp, “But I won’t turn back. Not now. Even after we get out of this, I can promise to you that I’ll look out for everyone. Especially Yuki-san”

She gave me a dazed look, before giving a smile in response.

“Thank you…”

We exchanged smiles at each other. Yet my eyes felt heavy for a moment.

I used to tear up over a lot of trivial things. It had exacerbated to a point where I stared into the roof of my office every night sobbing over a regret.

Yet I always questioned myself, did it really matter? A former School President breaking down in front of everyone. It wasn’t as if I would return to school after the apocalypse and people would whisper my name across the hallways.

But for the club’s sake. For Yuki’s sake. I had to press on.

A small shuffling started, followed by the door sliding open.

“Waaah!” Yuki fell through the door, with Kurumi standing beside her watching in amusement, “Oof!”

“Jeez” Kurumi walked in, “Were you trying to peep in on them?”

“How long were you listening?” Yuuri turned over.

“Hehe” Yuki scratched her head, “Perhaps for a minute”

By Yuki’s expression, it seemed that she hadn’t overheard much.

While Yuki and Kurumi started to settle back into the room, I rubbed my eyes.

“Here” Yuki passed the book, “You okay?”

“Of course” I smiled, “Anyways, Kurumi, I told Yuuri about it”

Kurumi gave a nod.

“Are you all hiding something from me?”

“You’ll find out one day”

“Aww” Yuki pouted, before turning over towards the door, “It’s Megu-nee!”

“What?” We all looked over.

We all scrambled towards our tents, with Yuki snatching the lamp and jumping into her bed within a second.

“What should we do?” Kurumi whispered loudly from her tent.

“Ssh” I called out from my tent.

After what felt like a year, I heard the door click open.

“Are there any naughty girls who are still awake?” The flashlight pointed towards the girls’ tent, before switching it over to mine, “I guess not… goodnight”

The door now creaked shut.

“She’s gone” Yuki whispered from her tent while zipping her tent open, “Are you still awake Ryu?”

“Yea” I responded back.

We all exchanged glances from the tent in awkward silence.

By then, Kurumi had released the urge to laugh.

“Well…” I gave a short yawn, “I think we shouldn’t get caught by Megu-nee again… Goodnight”

“Yea, goodnight Ryu” Yuki closed the tent.

“Night” Kurumi called out from her tent

As I laid down on my mattress, all I felt was that same epiphany I felt before. Even for a moment, I had the urge to laugh again. With the only thing holding me back from doing it was how close I was to falling asleep.

I do wish that these days would never end. The days where I didn’t feel like the serious council president that I had always had to follow.

The next day was marked by Yuuri, Kurumi and I packing the tents up while Yuki rushed to her classes surprisingly early. By the time we were finished, I had started to run late for class.

Despite the short walk to 3-C, my brain hadn’t completely shut itself down, for I still had to contend with the issue of playing along with Yuki’s make believe world.

I had started to get the hang of it, especially thanks to my profiling of every student and borrowing Yuki’s journal which gave me a logbook of her observations.

Yet from what I could tell, what Yuki wrote in her journal could be considered the ‘significant’ parts of her life. So when she mentioned how I ignored a student waving at me yesterday, I started to ponder if there were more incidents that Yuki had only noticed. .

I’ll be honest, I was starting to doubt the need to do this.

Especially since I had started to drain myself to a point where I had brought up quite an appetite, especially in this apocalypse.

Upon entering the room, I noticed Yuki staring at me while at her seat. Her rather odd look gave an indication that I had interrupted class.

“Sorry about that sensei” I walked towards my table, leaning towards Yuki, “What’s Kamiyama-sensei doing?”

“She’s introducing a new student to us”

“Is that so?” I gave a glance at the board, pretending that I had some sort of interest, “What’s her name?”

“Sensei hasn’t told us yet… but she seemed familiar…”

Familiar? Perhaps a family friend? Or someone she knew?

Well, did it really matter? It was just an extra student into the class. Another minor inconvenience I could bypass eventually.

Yuki continued to stare towards the board with a puzzled look as I settled into my table, visualizing this shy female student who probably hadn’t recognised which district she was living in.

It wasn’t the best image I had, but from what I had experienced in the past, that was all I could think of.

“So uh… Yuki-san” I scratched my head in embarrassment, “What was the new student’s name?”

“She’s just staring at the ground while Sensei is just telling us how to treat her” Yuki whispered towards my ear.

“Well isn’t that what most new students would do?”

“Yeah” Yuki leaned over to me with a smug look, “You would do the same, would you?”

“How about you, hm? Wouldn’t you act the same?”

“Nope!”

Even if Yuki was given the chance to say something in front of eight billion people, I couldn’t think of a scenario where she would have stage fright.

Yuki gave a few glances towards the board, before tapping at my shoulder.

“What’s her name?” I turned over.

“Uh… Hano Aki”

My world paused almost instantly.

I didn’t know how to respond.

“Uh…” I continued to stutter, “I…”

“Hm?”

Even if it was a misunderstanding considering that Yuki could’ve possibly overheard the part about I wished to see Hano again, I couldn’t say no or deflect it.

I just couldn’t deny this opportunity for some reason.

“Ryu-kun?” Yuki tugged on my blazer, “Is everything alright?”

“Of course” I gave a smile while whispering, “You do remember Hano, right?”

“Yeah! I was wondering why she seemed so familiar”

Although I had given out my smile, I felt my head aching with more questions coming through.

“Isn’t this perfect?” Yuki’s excited expression continued, “Your middle school friend is here!”

“How about we invite her to the club? We could introduce her to such”

“Of course! Yuuri and Megu-nee would love having another person in the club”

It was silly of me to assume Yuki would’ve known that Hano wouldn’t be interested.

“Oh wait… she probably chose the Art club as her first preference…”

“Oh…” Yuki stared up at the ceiling for a second, “But doesn’t the School Live Club do everything?”

“That’s quite the stretch, Yuki. The club does everything as in everything that requires physical labor. Not leisure. Hence why we help the Horticulture Club”

“Aw…” Yuki rested her face over her table, before giving a light tap at my shoulder, “Kamiyama-sensei is calling you…”

Either sensei wanted me to tour the new kid or just introduce myself to her since I’m the Council President.

“Of course”

I got up from my seat, staring straight towards the board. I had visualized the brown haired shy girl that I remembered, yet this time in High School clothing and grown by a few inches.

Yet, that same conscience that had urged me to play make believe with Yuki’s delusions begged me to be mature. To stop this silliness of a coping mechanism.

I was merely serving a nostalgic time. A time where I should’ve looked back with a smile rather than regret and kept on moving. Yet even if I knew I was meant to move on, it was impossible for me to simply ignore.

Besides, if Yuki knew Hano-chan, perhaps I wouldn't need to concern myself with playing this make-believe world on my own. If I wandered around my office pretending to be discussing with Hano-chan on my own, I’d start to realize that it was stupid.

Yet with Yuki, it could feel as if we were in our own world. Even if it was just the two of us.

I’m probably a bit insane, but I don’t mind.

“My name is Ryu Tanaka, I am Megurigaoka High School’s Council President, and… it is nice to see you again”

I could already imagine the surprised chatter around the classroom if it was in a normal school context. Hano wasn’t exactly well known across the middle school I went to, but someone that would make others give out that ‘I think I know you’ look in public.

The problem is, Yuki’s view of the world around her was skewed. Hence why everybody would treat Hano as just another random person.

Hence why I had to control Yuki’s world.

In order to not only play the game Yuki had thrown at me, but to also test if I’m willing to go down this unfamiliar trail of being like Yuki. Not only to latch onto something I treasured, but as a test.

Yuki gave a small wave while I sat down.

“So, Hano-chan… I didn’t know you were back in Megurigaoka…”

I could already visualize her response. How she spoke, her facial expressions, her inability to even confidently talk with anyone else beyond her family and me.

After a few seconds, what I thought of her response sounded almost legitimate to the real one.

“Is that so? How nice!” I glanced at Yuki, noticing her rather perplexed look as if she had realized she was the third wheel, “Yuki, you do remember Hano-chan, right?”

“Of course!” Yuki gave a nod, “You used to draw a lot of puppies before, right?”

“It was a group project for a competition” I corrected, “Hano-chan and I once drew a Shiba Inu puppy and almost won”

Hano was quite surprised at how we got second place out of ten other projects. Yet during the rare moments where we were asked about it at lunch, she often claimed it was luck.

“Ah don’t worry about it Hano-chan” I rested my head over my fist, “Just remember it wasn’t luck”

“Of course” Yuki nodded, “Your drawing of the puppy was impressive!” She turned towards the table.

For once in perhaps quite a long time, I had managed to align my dialogue straight into Yuki’s play. And by doing that, I could already tell through her smile that it was worth all the effort remembering Hano.

Ironically, it didn’t require much of an effort compared to the other students.

“Anyways Hano-chan, would you like me to tour you around the school during recess?”

“Sensei told you to tour her around when you got the time”

A bit too convenient… Yet it was also an issue for me…

“I could come with you if you want”

“I wish, but I don’t want you to feel like the third wheel”

“A third wheel?”

Even if I didn’t socialize much, I couldn’t grasp the fact that Yuki didn’t know what a third wheel was.

“As in someone who’s just an outlier of a group of three because the other two have a good relationship”

“Ah, so you like Hano-chan, don’t you?” Yuki gave a smug look.

“No no!” I felt my face turning red the moment I responded, “Not like that”

“Your face says it all”

“You know what” I stood up, “Let’s go Hano. I’ll introduce you to the school”

“Huh? Wait up!” Yuki got up from her seat.

Ever since that day, I had felt as if my world had finally changed to something bittersweet.

Yuki’s perception of Hano had allowed me to almost play along with her to such an extent, I had started to visualize her standing in front of me. Every simple movement or response to something was living proof that I still treasured her.

It sounded weird, but I think you get the point.

Sometimes during my entries, I had almost admitted to falling into Yuki’s delusions, as I started to acknowledge Hano, even though she wasn’t there. Yet reality had only started to strike when I realized it was getting silly.

It was like an addiction. When you’re doing it, all you can feel is the pleasure. But after you’re done with it, regret replaces the pleasure that you felt.

But even though I wrote this entry after playing with Yuki’s delusions, I still wish to continue. Even if I’ve had doubts over it.