CHAPTER 35

In any sort of fair world I would have been able to lie there until my friends showed up, just in time to see the last of the hazdahem's corpse dissolving. They would have said something like, "Wow, you killed him! You're so amazing, Athos! We're so lucky to know you. Here, let us magically fix all your owies, and then you can have all the bacon. And yes, we're happy to give you belly rubs and ear scritches until you drift off to sleep. You earned it."

Sadly, the world was not fair. I lay there, my owies fully in effect, feeling more and more disgusting as the demonic remains spackled themselves onto my fur. I was sore, and tired, and my everything hurt, and I didn't have any healing or protection or speed-boosting Skill uses left for today. So, obviously, a couple dozen demons showed up.

My one piece of good luck was that they were all spawnlings. I was a lot smaller than I had been ten minutes earlier, only a little larger than the largest of them and a lot smaller than any fully-grown demon I'd encountered thus far, and spawnlings were about the only thing around here that wouldn't necessarily think I looked like a tasty snack. The spawnlings saw me lying there next to the semi-dissolved torso and legs of their commander and they paused, murder-baby heads flopping back and forth as they considered how to react.

I had options. I could fight them and pick up some Attunement...but I was exhausted and hurting. I could puff myself up and growl, hope to scare them off with a little 'I beat your boss and I can beat you too' action...but there were a lot of them and only one of me. I could try to run...but see previous comments about being exhausted.

I climbed to my feet with a sigh and walked up the wall away from them.

o-o-o-o

"Hey, buddy," Marcus said, ruffling my ear with one hand while balancing his spear in the other. The head and crosspieces were slathered in the tarry gunk that demons seemed to leave behind after you killed them and they dissolved. Clearly, he and the others had seen some action.

"You'll feel a little pinch," Estelle said, resting her hand on my shoulder. "On three. One...two..."

Unsurprisingly, she jabbed the Spirit injector into me on two. I floofed back to full size and promptly gave her a 'did you really expect me to fall for that?' look. She laughed and shrugged unapologetically. "Try not to get hurt anymore, okay? If for no other reason than because we've only got two Spirit left in the injectors and it would be great if we could use that for refreshing the mana of the casters."

"Speaking of which," Sergeant Carpenter said. "The fighting's not over. How are you doing?"

"After that injection I'm back to full health and mana," I said via Murray. "But I've used up all my Skills that have daily use limits. The only things left are Spirit Transference and my new one, Surface-defined Gravitic Frame Bending."

"We're out of daily Skills same as you," Estelle said. "Eugene's not going to get to fist any more demons today."

Eugene glared daggers at her.

"Athos, I'm not familiar with this frame bending Skill you mentioned," Sergeant Carpenter said, visibly ignoring Estelle poking at Eugene. "Mind sharing?"

"It lets me walk on walls and ceilings and stuff," I said, keeping it simple. The Spirit injection had patched me up physically but it did nothing for the mental exhaustion I was feeling. This day had been entirely too full of running, fighting, emotional highs and lows, near-death experiences, and in general I thought I deserved a cookie and a nice nap on the heating vent. Hopefully with some of Mom's meditation music playing. I liked 'Waves on the Beach' best, but 'Rainfall' was okay too.

Actually, the heating vent wasn't necessary. I had reunited with my friends back in the kitchen they had been defending and it was soporifically warm. When I arrived I had killed one of the demons that were assaulting the door and the rest had run off, so things were quiet right now. I was sprawled out on the floor and struggling to keep my eyes open while the conversation went on around me.

"Good to know," Sergeant Carpenter said. "Like Estelle said, the rest of us are also out of Skills, and we're more beat up than you."

"We're done with the mission," Eugene said. "We killed the hazdahem. Time—"

"Athos killed the hazdahem," Estelle said.

"That's what I meant. Anyway, mission accomplished. Let's get back to the Bastion, right?"

Annette had been the one to let me in when I scratched at the door; apparently Melos approved of the way I had burned two separate demons to death with literally Spiritual fire and he gave her warning that I was approaching. She had given me an ear-ruffle when I came in, but since then she'd been leaning against the wall with her eyes closed and her arms folded on her chest. Now she opened her eyes.

"I think we probably want to get out of here," she said. "And we'll need to take the long way back to the Bastion."

Suddenly, everyone was tense.

"What's going on?" Marcus asked.

"I've been watching through the smoke of the Holy Flame," she said, gesturing towards the bonfire that was roaring in the hearth. That fireplace was designed for cooking entire cows at a time and she had stoked it to capacity and beyond; the flames were shooting up the chimney and the heat came rolling out in waves that made staying in that half of the room more than a little uncomfortable. On the other hand, the smooth green-gray stones of this room were so layered with the scent of wood smoke and meat pies and cabbages and cheese and spices that it drowned out all but the faintest whiff of the city's sulfuric stench. Between that and the heat and the not being in pain and the absent-minded head stroking that I was getting from Estelle, I was barely awake.

"And what did you see through the Sacred Soot?" Eugene asked, grinning.

She glowered at him for a moment but let it go. "The City Council have finally gotten involved. I'm not sure what they've been doing all this time but they're out in force now—or, at least, I'm assuming that's who this is. I can see two hazdahem and a whole lot of flying demons fighting against a half dozen people with wings, carpets, or whatever. The fight is moving this way and there's a lot of collateral damage happening." She paused, looking at the fire in the hearth and chewing her lip for a moment. "We need to torch the neighborhood."

"What?" Corporal Belker said. "Why? If the Council are on their way..."

"This area will be destroyed regardless," Annete said. "It should be done in a way that honors Lord Melos. We set it on fire and let it burn as long as he wishes to sustain it, or until the battle between the demons and the Council gets here and razes the place."

Private Chi smiled. "Looks like all those lessons on proper etiquette paid off."

The rest of the guardsmen except for Sergeant Carpenter laughed. He looked at them disapprovingly.

"What are you talking about?" Eugene demanded.

"It's an old Guardsman joke," Corporal Belker said. "Proper etiquette is to pillage, then burn. Right, Top?" The last words were directed to Sergeant Carpenter.

The sergeant looked around at us, then shook his head. "It's a joke, Belker, not actual life advice. The City Guard is an honorable organization and we don't steal."

"Actually, it's not stealing," Deimos said helpfully. "Stealing is defined as unlawful appropriation of property owned by an tagged resident under circumstances where said resident would have a reasonable expectation of further use of the property. If this neighborhood is about to be destroyed then this would be salvage, not stealing."

Multiple eyebrows went up and Estelle's hand stilled in surprise. I bumped my head against it as a reminder that the experience of surprise and a bit of shock was not a valid excuse for dereliction of duty. She glanced down at me, smiled, and went back to alternating between stroking my head and scritching behind my ear. I sighed happily and lay my head back on my paws.

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"How do you know that?" Eugene demanded.

Deimos shrugged. "I did two years of a law degree at City." He paused. "Actually, I started off in medicine but I couldn't handle the surgical part." He gagged. "The organs shifting around...I wasn't bothered by blood, but having to see the squelchy bits...ew. Anyway, I switched to law for two years and then to the Accordant track at the Scholarium."

"You couldn't handle the disgusting parts of humanity...so you became a lawyer?" Annette asked, grinning. "Not sure you've put enough stones in that light."

He grinned at her. "Hey, I've got stones to go all night. Want to see?"

I leaned over to Estelle; Murray fluttered down to be near her ear. "What are they talking about?" he quietly asked her for me.

She smiled and patted my head. "I'll tell you when you're older."

I gave her a Mom Look, and then paused. "Oh, wait. It's a sex thing, isn't it?" I forgot to speak quietly that time.

The humans all laughed.

"Yes, it's a sex thing," Marcus said, grinning. "He's making a pun between the 'stones', the things that we use as money and as an energy source for magical devices, and 'stones' meaning testicles. He's implying that he is capable of repeatedly having sexual intercourse for an entire night, a thing that human males are not generally capable of." He was grinning at Deimos as he spoke, clearly teasing.

"Not necessarily," Estelle said. "It could be a reference to having enough stones to power a—"

"Aaaand, we're done here," Annette said quickly. "Why don't you lot go loot—I mean salvage as much as you can while I set up the burn? Ten minutes and then we head out. That work for you, Sergeant?"

He considered it for a moment. "You're sure that this area is going to be demolished?"

"They're headed this way and there's a lot of houses being flattened in the process. Listen."

Everyone went quiet and strained their ears.

I didn't bother. I'd been listening to the fighting for twenty minutes now. It was at least a mile away and unlikely to threaten us in the immediate future.

"Can you guys go do whatever you want, but please do it quietly?" I asked hesitantly. "I'd really like to get a nap before we go anywhere else. All the shrinking and growing is exhausting. And so was the almost dying."

Everyone smiled at that. "Of course," Master Hethok said. "Nap well, my large friend. Lady Annette, I have no wish to interfere between yourself and your god but do you suppose he would object to me attending upon you as you make your preparations? As an elder salamander I find myself positively inclined towards any fire god, and yours has shown himself both puissant and unusually wide-reaching in his powers. I should like very much to learn more of him. And of you."

She raised an eyebrow but smiled. "Sure. Grab that cask of oil and let's go." She hoisted a five-gallon wooden cask onto her shoulder and ducked through the door into the alley. Master Hethok lassoed a second cask with his tongue and followed her out.

Everyone watched them go in silence. After a moment, Private Smith said, "Did the giant lizard just put the moves on her?"

Consideration was given by the crowd at large, with Deimos looking particularly grumpy.

"Love is where you find it?" Private Garcia finally offered.

"Seriously fucked up, if you ask me," Eugene said. "Whatever. Let's see what we can find in this place and then get gone."

o-o-o-o

There was apparently a fair amount to find in a rich person's house at the base of Scarf Knob. People came back carrying pillowcases, backpacks, and carrybags full of things that clinked. I couldn't bring myself to care, instead choosing to lumber to my feet with a tired groan. All I wanted was a much longer nap. Well, and a bath to get the disgusting tar of dead demon out of my fur; apparently resetting my body by way of Spirit donation/injection did not in fact double as a bath. Oh, and I also wanted some food. Ideally with mint because I was feeling a little queasy. Some bacon was always nice although right now that was more pro forma than anything; what I really wanted was sleep. And a nice ear-ruffling while lounging on Dad's lap in front of the noisybox.

I pushed all that aside with a sigh and headed outside, then walked up the wall to look around at what was happening.

The center of the demons vs (probably) Council fight was half a mile away, between us and the Bastion. The outer edge of the battle was ill-defined and everyone involved shifted around a lot and very quickly, but it wasn't close enough to be immediately worrisome.

I recognized the winged snake from earlier. Zeth was fighting with elemental attacks, sending out tongues of flame, jets of wind compressed so tight as to be visible, vertical columns of water that appeared from nowhere and lasted only long enough to smash a demon, and chunks of stone that blasted themselves out of the earth as though shot from a cannon, smashing whatever was in front of them and then soaring off into the distance in a way that was probably going to smoosh some random people on the far end of the arc.

Beside zeth was a human...ish person. Take one of those Ken dolls that Cassie's friend Kayla liked so much and melt the lower half together into a smooth blob of iridescent blue, add angel wings large enough to wrap completely around the creature as a shield from attack, and you would have this. They (I couldn't really say 'he', given the lack of appropriate bits) used pairs of portals as their primary weapon. Attacks that were fired at them vanished into one portal and appeared immediately in front of an enemy's head. Moving enemies would find a portal appearing in front of them; the portal would vanish when they were halfway through it and the victim's severed body would plummet to the ground.

Half a dozen more and stranger-looking people fought beside them. Working together they were slowly carving their way through the enemy, although as Annette had said there was a lot of collateral damage going on. My team and I hadn't encountered them, but apparently the demons had been holding spellcasters in reserve. Tornadoes of fire, rains of acid, darts of light-absorbing destruction, and more inventive weapons struck out at the Council. As I watched, one of the Council members (a floating donut made out of blood with a pair of eyes hovering in the center) got torn apart by what I guessed was a pair of opposed gravity columns, one pointing up and one pointing down. The fight continued unabated, the Council shifting their formation to cover the gap.

"What do you see?" Estelle called up from the ground below, trying to keep her voice down as much as she could.

I turned around and walked down the wall to where they waited, then relayed my findings. Partway through the recitation I was gratified to rediscover that Murray could talk clearly for me even while I was stuck in a jaw-cracking yawn.

"We definitely need to go," Annette said. "Everybody ready?" There was a general chorus of assent so she lifted her torch (really a chunk of chairleg with a rag soaked in cooking oil wrapped around it) to the sky. "Lord Melos, Highest of the High, Watcher Over All, Lord of the Flame of Creation and Destruction, Greatest of the Heterarchy, please accept this humble offering from your most loyal and obedient servant. May it please You and its light in some tiny way remind the world of Your power and glory. In Your light I pray. To Your pleasure I make this offering, O Highest of the High." She tossed the torch down the alley, dropping it on the pile of oily rags that we'd left against the side of the next building. They went up with a loud fwoomp! and the flames quickly spread along two trails of oil to two more carefully-placed piles of fuel that should get the heavy wooden walls burning nicely.

"Her god is one needy bitch," Private Garcia muttered. Corporal Belker slapped him upside the head.

"Come on," Sergeant Carpenter said. "Let's get back to the Bastion."

o-o-o-o

The actual hike back to the Bastion was not nearly as bad as we had expected. More and more of the demons were being pulled into the fight with the Council, leaving mostly spawnlings and random summoned-but-uncontrolled creatures for us to deal with, as well as a trio of human looters. We ran into them six blocks from the start of our venture; we all came around the corner and froze as we saw each other. They were two women and a man, all carrying swords that dripped multi-colored sparkles and backpacks stuffed past the brim with stolen valuables. There were a few seconds of silent study exchanged and then we all nodded and went our separate ways.

"Shouldn't we have stopped them?" I asked Sergeant Carpenter once the looters were out of sight.

He shrugged. "Why? We're the City Guard, not the police. Even if we were the police for this particular neighborhood, I doubt the owners of that stuff have had enough time to post the recovery fee for their property."

"They might have had a retainer in escrow," Private Smith pointed out. "That's what my apartment complex did growing up. Everyone kicked in a few stone a month based on the list of items they wanted recovered in case of a robbery."

The conversation had quickly devolved into a slew of questions about implementation details from Privates Smith and Funter, who thought the idea had merit and wanted to propose it to their own neighbors. I tuned it out and focused on listening for any approaching enemies. I really didn't want to have another big fight.

Fortunately, we didn't have to. We met two more balor who were slinking away from the larger fight. Master Hethok torched them to ash. A swarm of about a hundred spawnlings tried to overrun us; Aerith boxed them in with his walls and Annette tossed a 'Hezman flagon' into the middle, spraying blazing oil everywhere and slowly burning them to death as we walked away; apparently newborn demons were not completely immune to fire. My insides curdled at the sounds; even though they were people-killing evil monsters from beyond this Realm I didn't like hearing them die in agony.

All things considered, it was a tremendous relief when we made it back to the Bastion. We trudged through the door and into the massive marble lobby wherein Watch Commander Selb had set up his command post. He was back behind the counter, making notes as we arrived. The left half of the counter was covered in a large sheet draped over something bumpy, and the right half had papers and maps strewn around that Commander Selb was moving through, reading things here and there and occasionally making notes.

He heard us enter and looked up, a small and satisfied smile on his face as he recognized us. "Welcome back. By the reports, you lot had a bit of an adventure." He moved to his right, down to where the sheet-covered whatever was.

"Excuse me," I said, 'exhausted' and 'hopeful' warring for control of my voice. (Thank you, Murray, for accurately representing me!) "It's been a long day and I was wondering if we could get some—"

As I started talking, Commander Selb whipped the sheet back to reveal a half-dozen metal basins with curved covers over them. I stopped talking when he lifted the lid on the nearest one and a familiar scent wafted out.

"Some bacon?" Commander Selb asked, lips quirked in amusement. "Like I said, I've been getting reports about your little adventures and yes, I think you've earned some cooked pig." He glanced around at the rest of the team. "There's other stuff too, so everybody grab a plate. You can debrief while you eat."

I had been going to say 'sleep', but bacon was good too.