I could not recollect the word ‘recollection’. Life was a blur and I was the condensation on an elder’s spectacles.

If I was to describe my delirium as a state... I would call it purgatory. A realm of neither agonising pain, nor ejaculating joy. A realm that merely went past with little memory of it ever existing the previous second.

In rare moments, that were impossible to space out, I remembered seeing colours, hearing noises, smelling smells, and the touching touch of dryness on my phantom tongue.

I eventually began to notice that this sensations grew in quantity and intensity. Until I finally woke up that is  –

                                                                                 ************

I awoke to soft comfort under my beside, and a sluggish toll on my body. My first experience back in physical world was pain. A pain caused by a powerful invasion directly in front of my face. The pain only lasted a mere pica of a second, my eyes squinted themselves with a speed and efficiency I did not notice or realise at the time.

Like most people that wake up in a strange place, I quickly attempted to arise from my position. This caused a swarm of invisible fire ants to invade every inch of long dormant limbs.

- I’m going to fast forward a bit here, as It happened, I passed out a couple times, and I’m pretty the whole ordeal lasted like an hour. Don’t wanna bore you with too much detail about a dude trying to stand up. I’d describe it even less if I could draw. Stupid comic book artists and their demon magic. One day I’ll learn how to draw ripped dudes –

I eventually got out of what I had now confirmed to be a bed. My legs spasmed at an intensity that only the most oldest of washing machines could match. I stood still for about a minute, allowing my legs a bit of time to adjust themselves to their new upright position.

I took my first step... Or at least tired to. Half way through the process I felt an immediate tug on my ting-tong tally-wacker.  I quickly inspected the area and found a long plastic tube lodge in the ‘no lodge zone’. And like any sane young man, my first course of action was to scream - shortly followed by the violently yanking out the none-sentient intruder in my pee-pee hole.

That was a big mistake...

“You’re awake!” A familiar feminine voice screeched out of nowhere.

I turned to source of the squawk and was met with the sight of my rosy mother, clad in an apron and wet rubber gloves.

“H-hey mum...” I croaked, barely audible from the lack of practice and moisture in my mouth.

The woman darted towards my body that was now sprawled across the floor. A normal person might have felt shame at being found on the floor naked, with a tube beside them, slowing dribbling out their old urine. But not Mr David Wimble – Who is I. I was at least thankful my mother didn’t comment on it and just helped me up.

I watched her clasp my body and aid in it’s ascent. I was confused to see that my mother’s brawny hand that was wrapped around my left arm was actually wrapped around it. Her whole hand had managed to meet itself in full circle, around my wondrously mediocre bicep. Where is all my fat gone?! I remembered thinking to myself.

I finally arose to my full height, with my legs shaking slightly less than previously, and was again confused. My mother, a short woman that I was only an eyebrow taller than, was now craning her neck to meet my eyes.

“Did you get ye’r shins sawed off while I asleep – or something’, mum?” I asked, half joking, half not.

“Don’t be daft David! You’ve had a bit of a growth spurt in the month you’ve been out, you ‘ave. Hell, you barley look like the same boy!”

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“Growth spurt huh...” I mumbled to myself, very much liking the sound of that.

“Stop grinning to yourself, you daft sod. Get back in bed ‘n’ get some rest. I’ll go get ya some clothes for you to put on.”

I normally relished in the idea of idea of getting into bed, and looked for any excuse to cuddle with my best friend, but for some reason, even with legs that threatened to crumble at any second, I wanted to do anything but. Instead I just draped my body in my blanket and waited for clothes to appear.

It didn’t take long for my mother to get me some clothes, as we were in my bedroom, I briefly wondered why I wasn’t in a hospital. She passed me some clothes and turned her back on me, allowing me a smidge of privacy. Both the T-shirt and tracksuit bottoms I now wore were horrifically baggy. The shirt exposed my bellybutton; the trousers were only able to stay around my waist with the aid of my hands. This without a doubt confirmed that I grown in height and shrunk in width. Unless of course my mother was playing an extraordinarily elaborate prank.

“I’m done” I informed her.

“My lord... puberty really is one strange thing... One minute your my lil’ chubby boy, with my brown eyes and yo’r father’s wavy brown ‘air. Now yo’r an ‘ead taller, legs like a supermodel, hands bigger than me head, ‘airs all long and always wet for some reason. Your eyes are even now a yellowy green, never heard of that happenin’ before, I ‘aven’t. Oh and why the ‘ell are you always so greasy now? I swear I’ve given you more baths this past month, than I did when you were a babe, not to mention your skin is now softer than your one year old arse ever was. And why is your acne now gone – even though you’re greasier than a donor kebab?

After hearing this, I ran immediately as fast as my crippled legs would allow to large mirror fixed on my bedroom wardrobe. Everything my mother said was true. I was now lanky, incredible so. A moment ago I was more torso than man. Stubby arms, stubby legs, big head, huge stomach. Now it was the opposite. All or my appendages had done most of the growing, while my middle had gone little growing. I had also lost an astonishing amounts of weight; even a small amount of colour complexion. These combined together gave me a slight  skeletal look. My now straight dark hair that nearly reached my shoulders upgraded me from skeleton to heavy metal enthusiast.

“What happened..?” I asked my mother behind me, as I slowly molested myself in the mirror. My mother was right, my skin was so soft, kinda like velvet.

“I’m not sure, luv. One minute I’m ‘avin a swim, the next I hear you screamin’ for your life, with an octopus wrapped around you. You passed at just before I got to you. Me and a young couple tried to pull the thing off you, but it wouldn’t budge. Just before the lifeguard got there, the creature goes and  jumps of you like nothing had happened and disappears into the sea. Took you to ‘ospital. You were there for a week before we got you ‘ome. You’ve been in a coma for over a month ‘n’ a half, David.” My mother told me in a sombre tone. A tone I hadn’t heard since she told me my cat had been hit by a bicycle when I was sixteen.

“I see...” Was all that I could muster in response. Fatigued suddenly swarmed my senses.

“Get some sleep luv. I’ll go phone the nurse and tell her that your awake. When you’re up again, they’ll  be a giant meal waiting for ya. Don’t be gonna back in no coma though, luv.” She said, sensing my sudden exhaustion.

I did as I was bade and headed to my bed. I fell asleep before my mum had even left the room. It’s amazing how the desire to sleep can override the realisation that your life has changed forever.