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Chapter 20

Wen Reian

2019 years after The Long Night

Huichâng Province

Reian was washing his face in the basin of water, relishing the feeling after traveling through the desert for so many weeks. The woman who maintained the tomb and her husband had been more than accommodating after listening to their story, and the three of them had been allowed to stay for a night or two in their couple’s old farmhouse until they could continue on to Hêi’àn City.

After being certain that A’Jun was peacefully asleep in a guest bedroom, Reian had been shown to his own. After standing there staring at the wall for about fifteen minutes, Wen Reian finally shook himself and tried his best to relax, attempting to remind himself what it was to be safe, and under a roof of all things!

The healer’s hands shook slightly as he dipped the cloth into the lukewarm water and then brought it to his face. He’d managed to mostly heal his shoulder on the way here, but it was still sore, and he wondered how silly it would be of him to ask Songcai to heal it once they were home…

The silence in the room was palpable, and Reian didn’t understand why that was bothering him so much until he recalled almost falling asleep earlier to the sound of Lan Kai-Le’s heartbeat.

Reian had told the hunter to change and whatever else he needed to do before joining him. A small tinge of fear welled up in Reian’s throat as he thought about healing Kai-Le. He really wanted to, he wanted to spend as much time as they both needed, curing him of whatever aches and pains his body possessed, but Reian was nervous it wouldn’t be that easy.

A knock at the door startled him from his thoughts, and since Reian would have been able to sense someone coming, he knew immediately who it was...

“Come in-” Reian’s words were cut off when Lan Kai-Le abruptly pushed inside, the man closing the door with a heavy frown.

Wen Rei swallowed, eyes lowering to where Kai-Le had bandaged his leg. Blood still seeped through. The sight tore at his heart, and more than that, Reian felt his heart physically collapse as the man in front of him came closer and then reached out to touch Reian’s shoulder gently, his frown deepening, almost in anger.

“It’s fine,” Reian said quickly. “I heal fast…”

He looked at Kai-Le’s leg again and decided that even if he didn’t heal him with magic, he could at least dress the wound properly in something other than rags.

“Sit down. Can you pull that up?”

Reian was glad that under the sink he’d already found antiseptics and bandages, but when he saw there were even a few jars of an anti-coagulating herb he almost sighed in relief.

Part of Songcai’s training all those years was helping Reian learn not to rely entirely on his powers…

“Before we had distilled our magic to how it is today, my people were taught how to heal using the earth itself. It’s important to remember the basics, as sometimes they are all we have-“

Wen Reian was smiling to himself as he kneeled on the floor next to where Lan Kai-Le was sitting. Remembering Songcai’s words had him missing home even more, though he was thrilled they would be returning tomorrow.

“Why aren’t you using what you were taught?”

Reian helped Kai-Le take off the old dressing and then roll up his pant leg as he answered him;

“I’m afraid to use my magic on you, since your aura is sealed. It could cause more damage, so we won’t risk it…”

He thought about telling Kai-Le that Songcai might be able to help more, but then decided not to, since the hunter’s soul-repression was so thorough that he worried not even the foremost healer of all time could make a dent in it.

“You fixed my hands,”

Lan Kai-Le didn’t wince or make any sounds or faces as Wen Reian cleaned his wound and applied the medicine. The gashes were on his shin, likely made with the heel of a boot, and Reian got a bit nauseous as he recalled trying to keep those horrible people from hurting the man.

“Yes, well…” Reian tried to think of how to explain as he slowly tied on a new bandage.

How could he say that back then, he didn’t really care if his magic backfired and killed Kai-Le, since at the time, Reian basically despised him.

Recalling how he’d once treated him, remembering how furious he was at Lan Kai-Le and how, for at least a few seconds or maybe even longer, he’d genuinely wanted him to die… it all made the healer light-headed the more he thought about it.

Reian stood after the bandage was set, a lump in his throat that made it hurt to breathe as he tried to figure out what he was supposed to say next. He didn’t think Lan Kai-Le would want to hear thank you, or I’m sorry, but what else was Wen Reian to say?

The hunter had listened to him in a way that he’d allowed no one else to. Kai-Le had understood what Reian said when he told him how his biggest regret was killing someone, and then without thinking less of Reian, had stopped him from making the same mistake again. All while walking away from perhaps his only real chance of revenge against his family’s killer.

What was Reian supposed to say about any of that? About how it made him ache, deep down in his gut when he thought of being seen like that, but because it was Lan Kai-Le, the ache wasn’t entirely… bad?

Reian stood statue still in the center of the room again, gaze lowered to the floor, at a complete loss for words. Eventually, his eyes raised up to see Lan Kai-Le staring at him, his shoulders tensed and clearly holding something inside.

As Reian looked at the coins and beads in the man’s hair, all he could think of was how quickly Lan Kai-Le had destroyed one of the last pieces of his heritage by shattering it on the floor, and then picked a shattered Reian up off the very same floor.

At last, growing weary of the silence, Reian moved to the sink again, thinking maybe he could keep washing and Lan Kai-Le would take that as a sign to leave…

As Reian reached out for the towel, suddenly there was movement behind him and then his eyes locked with the hunter’s golden ones in the mirror.

“You-”

Silenced by the fierce look in the man’s eyes, Reian held still as Kai-Le took the cloth from him, turning Reian around and then coming so close that the healer could see all the fine, exotic details of his face.

Like that, Lan Kai-Le began to press the towel across Wen Reian’s brow, his cheeks and chin, so lightly and slowly that Reian had more than enough time to study every little thing about the man. His beautifully shaped emerald and honey colored eyes, his high cheekbones and angular nose. Even the way his ears stuck out a little. What drew Reian’s gaze the most, was the tattooed line down Kai-Le’s chin and bottom lip...

Reian had once found it strange, as shocking as the rest of him. But, what used to be a face that confused and scared him, had become the face of someone he felt oddly attached to.

Lan Kai-Le was, very odd. But he had protected Reian, and Reian had protected him. He’d almost died with him. And truly, if he thought about it, maybe it was Wen Reian himself who was the odd one; having the judgements he did against Kai-Le just because he looked, acted, and spoke a bit different.

Feeling the man’s gentle touch across his face, Kai-Le still frowning darkly with his lips pushed into an adorable, but frustrated pout, Wen Reian hardly knew his own mind anymore as he reached up-

Will he push me away? Does he even understand...

He carefully grabbed the back of Lan Kai-Le’s neck with one hand, standing up on his toes and slowly drawing the man down to him. For some reason, he didn’t know why, Reian kept his eyes open as he pressed his lips against Kai-Le’s.

Feeling the tension rising in the man’s body suddenly, his pupils widening and the little jerk of his head as if he couldn’t believe what was happening, Wen Reian let him go immediately.

Strange, he thought, feeling no embarrassment or anxiety, though it had been more than ten years since he’d done that. I didn’t… hate it… with someone else-

But Lan Kai-Le was staring at Reian so pitifully now, clearly confused, eyes wide and dark with the faintest of blushes brightening his cheeks.

Reian blinked, saying; “People do that sometimes, kiss? You know, to show…” he searched for the proper word. “Affection-”

Once again, Reian was interrupted. But Lan Kai-Le didn’t respond. He didn’t reach out for Reian, or even give so much as an acknowledging little ‘mmn’ before the man was up and gone.

Wen Reian watched, questions and answers dying on his tongue as the hunter abruptly left, the door swinging back into place behind him with a thunderous creak.

Standing there, not thinking for some time, it was the sky darkening outside that finally brought Reian back into his body.

Swallowing back the gathering tightness in his throat, the healer mindlessly dressed for bed, pulling the blankets up and settling beneath them as he blew the candle out and tried to close his eyes.

There were too many things in his head to sleep, yet at the same time he felt as if someone had come into his mind, cleared out every useful thing, and in its place left only one recurring thought.

Was that his first kiss? Did I… just steal Lan Kai-Le’s first kiss?! I didn’t mean to… I wasn’t… thinking-

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The uncomfortable knot in his throat only grew as the hours passed, Reian recalling Kai-Le’s abrupt entrance and his wordless caring as he more or less traced the contours of his face, Reian as always, never quite knowing what the man was trying to say.

I shouldn’t have done that! Was I taking advantage of him?! It’s not that I necessarily want him in that way I just, hang on... want him in what way? Wen Reian! Get a hold of yourself-

Reian was dizzy, musing back and forth over every little thing, every look of Kai-Le’s that might have meant something he was supposed to understand. What ended up really sticking in his mind however, as the time drifted away into the very late hours of the night, was only this; it’s been so many weeks now. Falling asleep beside him, listening to his breathing... I’m not sure I can sleep alone anymore-

Blinking tiredly as he once again tossed around in bed, Reian guiltily recalled that inappropriate dream he’d had only a few nights ago, wondering if his stolen kiss was simply due to being curious. Still, I should never have just-

“...”

Reian’s momentary terror at seeing the door hanging open was replaced with the most unbelievable feeling of safety, his eyes traveling over Lan Kai-Le’s shadowed form as the man slowly came inside.

Upon seeing that Reian was awake, Kai-Le’s whole demeanor changed. Clearly no longer trying to be quiet, he relaxed with an audible sigh, kicking his boots off and then removing the harness that held his weapons in place.

Wen Reian didn’t question the rush of relief he felt, nor wanted to, as Kai-Lei flopped down rather clumsily into bed. Perhaps he was tired. Reian smiled in the darkness, moving over to make room, and as the heat of the man’s body and his closeness gradually reached him, Wen Rei noticed that the tightness in his throat and all his unease had melted away as easily as the snow in springtime...

Lan Kai-Le was doing what he’d done before when he was relaxed and wanted comfort; curling up under the covers and nuzzling his head against Reian’s stomach, which of course caused the healer to laugh.

Knowing Kai-Le didn’t like anyone touching his hair, Reian instead reached out not with his hands but with his aura. It was still risky, Lan Kai-Le’s spirit could lash out at his, even without him meaning to, but right now, Reian didn't care.

Sending gentle little flutters of light into Kai-Le’s heart, wherever it lay beating, Reian enjoyed the thought that perhaps the man might be able to feel at ease and cared for, in whatever small way. Lan Kai-Le had certainly done the same for him...

With no way for me to know what he’s feeling, I suppose I’ll just have to do this the old fashioned way-

Reian softly caught Kai-Le’s shoulders and gently tugged, stifling his grin when the man peaked his head out. It was such a sweet, innocent thing to witness such a guarded and dangerous person do. Beyond humbled to be the one able to see such a side of him, Wen Reian wished he could articulate an answerable question. Something Kai-Le could respond to, to let Reian know even a little bit of what he was feeling now. What came out instead was; “I’m sorry…”

Warm golden eyes blinked up at him, clearly confused, so Reian laughed awkwardly and decided to try again.

“I shouldn’t have… done that without asking. Are you-”

Reian should’ve been used to it by now; never being able to finish a thought. However, he was still fairly awe-struck when Lan Kai-Le interrupted him again. The man moved before he could react, inching his face so close that the healer didn’t even have the space to breathe. Then suddenly, it happened.

“Ah!” Crying out in surprise as Lan Kai-Le leaned in and licked him, Reian tried to pull away. What the-

“Hey, that tickles!”

Before he knew it, Wen Reian was giggling loudly, desperately trying to move away from Lan Kai-Le’s as the man repeatedly drew closer and slid his tongue across Reian’s cheeks and chin, seeming as if he was only taking Wen Rei’s laughter as delight.

The healer was gasping for air, heart racing as he shrieked and tumbled around on the bed like he wasn’t a highly-skilled cultivator in his thirties. At last, he found himself with his hands holding firmly onto Kai-Le’s shoulders, Reian having to physically pin the man down in order to keep him from continuing.

Panting, staring down into those tumultuous eyes, Wen Rei was unable to hide the smile in his voice as he demanded-

“What are you doing?!”

Lan Kai-Le frowned again, tilting his head in that way that reminded Reian of a puppy.

“Affection,” the man answered. “Do you like it?”

Reian had barely stopped laughing as he tried to respond.

“Well, yes but-“

Hold on a minute. Blinking suddenly as if realizing something that should have been far too obvious, Reian stared at the man. It’s almost too perfect…

He finally remembered a few fragments of the rather tipsy conversation he had with Lan Kai-Le, about the years he spent as a child living in the forest. Perhaps, could it be? He raised an eyebrow, heart softening all over again as Kai-Le continued to stare at him, patiently.

“You must have spent more time watching animals than humans,” Reian mused. “When I said kiss, you thought I meant-”

When Lan Kai-Le stuck his chin out and his gaze fell to Reian’s throat, the healer couldn’t help from feeling the most overwhelming heat sizzle through him, reddening his face.

He’s trying his best. Trying to kiss me, the only way he knows how-

Staring down at the man, Wen Rei felt certain that whatever past Kai-Le had, it was definitely far past time for him to unlearn a few things. And maybe discover some new...

Reaching his hand up, Reian gently took the man’s chin between his thumb and forefinger. Tracing over the tattooed line, it was mere seconds later that he was bending down and whispering softly into Kai-Le’s ear.

“I want to kiss you, do you want to kiss me too?”

It had been so long. So long since Reian had felt anything even similar to desire. What he felt now for Lan Kai-Le was… close? Different in that he couldn’t feel what the man was feeling, and it was strange to not have another’s sensations in the mix. Reian didn’t want to do anything against his will. That knowledge, that there was a barrier between them, made Reian take his time.

Slow down...

As Lan Kai-Le took a second to nod in response, Reian leaned away and met his eyes. There, he saw a swirling curiosity, as well as the man’s clear uncertainty, combined of course with that same fierceness that was indicative of loyalty and trust. Such a complex range of emotions, and Reian was enjoying seeing every single one.

“It’s like this,” he explained again, pressing their mouths together gently. “Your lips and my lips, as if they’re saying hello.”

Lan Kai-Le blinked up at him. Reian swallowed, deciding to wait for some response.

If he leaves again, then I’ll know. It wasn’t meant to-

“Wah!”

Reian got the breath knocked out of him as Lan Kai-Le grabbed the healer and practically pounced on him! Only having a few seconds to get his bearings, Wen Reian ended up with his hands clutching tightly at the man’s shirt while Kai-Le bent and crushed their lips together.

It wasn’t a kiss, not really. Lan Kai-Le pressed almost as hard as he could, and for far too long. When he finally sat up, Reian was bright red and gasping for air.

“Hello,” the man above him said.

Of course, Kai-Le had to go and make Reian laugh again, further prolonging Reian’s lungs suffering. Smiling widely, the healer reached up and wrapped his hands around the man’s neck once more. Shaking his head and clicking his tongue mischievously, Reian noticed how fast Lan Kai-Le was breathing, that knowledge only urging him on.

“It’s a good start-” he chuckled, and then everything fell apart.

Fell apart? Fell into place? Who knows, who cares-

Wen Reian was flying, convinced that it couldn’t just be his lack of practice over the past few years that was making Lan Kai-Le seem as if he was already picking it up, and was rather proficient! No, some natural talent was involved here, to be sure.

It was… beyond! It was beyond imagining, the things that this man could do. Reian had thought he’d forgotten what it felt like to really, truly want somebody. To crave their soft breaths and their pleasure. To feel like he would do just about anything for one more kiss-

He tastes exactly like I thought he would in that dream, mint leaves and fire; such a unique combination, so intense…

Lan Kai-Le was currently just a few forceful kisses from causing Reian to start stripping their clothes, but he knew if that happened he would never be able to pull away again. Kai-Le’s nearness was like a blanket he wanted to be wrapped in all the time. It wasn’t something he could part with easily.

But god, if he hasn’t shattered all ideas I had about being celibate by choice-

Groaning loudly as he pushed the man away, Reian opened his eyes to quite a thing…

The hunter’s eyes were gleaming, black diamonds in the night, and Reian watched as Kai-Le immediately caught sight of the silver string of saliva still connecting their lips. The man had kissed Reian unlike anything he’d ever experienced, the healer at times growing shy because of how hungry Kai-Le seemed. This, of course, only prompted the man to delve his tongue even deeper into Reian’s mouth, trading gasps and hums of appreciation as their fevers grew.

Kai-Le kissed as if he’d been withheld from doing so his whole life, like a ban had been suddenly lifted and he wanted to make up for lost time. And Reian couldn’t complain.

Now, Kai-Le moved once again. This time however, it was to press a very soft peck upon Wen Rei’s mouth. A gentle hello…

With dawn slowly breaking outside, it was obvious both of them were exhausted and needed to sleep at the very least a few hours. Having laid down on their sides, face to face, both of their eyes were flickering closed between even breaths.

For several minutes, Reian explored Kai-Le’s face again, this time with his lips. He kissed the tip of the man’s nose, both his cheeks, his temples and his forehead and of course both black dots under each eye. Reian pressed his lips up and down Kai-Le’s chin, rubbing softly, just feeling the man’s sweet exhales as he did. His lips were chapped by the time he was done, and Reian had the stray thought that he really could lay here and side by side with Kai-Le and be satisfied for the rest of his life.

Eyes closed, arms pulled tight against his chest as the hunter hugged him, Reian drifted off with his own chin resting comfortably upon the man’s collarbone, his lips against Kai-Le’s neck.

As he dreamed, Reian had the sense that Lan Kai-Le was there too. A glimmer of the man’s hidden aura perhaps, showing itself to Reian finally in such a place, as if it was the only time it felt safe…

Reian laughed and danced and gently stroked the light that fluttered around him. He greeted it with kisses, and welcomed it out into the open, unsure if it was all a fantasy but knowing in his heart that it didn’t matter, as long as Lan Kai-Le was here.

To his astonishment and also joy, Reian realized that Kai-Le’s own soul was greeting him too! The light, like sunshine filtering through trees, dappled and beautiful and oh-so-gentle… it reached out and touched Reian, softly at first, and then with more confidence.

Pretty soon, both of their auras were flying together, swirling and combining as one. To Wen Reian, it felt as if all the pieces he’d been aware he was missing for so long, were suddenly slotting back into place. It was safe, it was complete… and everything was finally, miraculously good.

It’ll be okay, I don’t know how, but it will. There’s this assurance I have suddenly, which is odd when I still have so many questions…

The only thing Reian did know, as everything inside him centered and sang in harmony, was how impossibly good it felt to finally recognize his own soul, after being strangers with his reflection for so long.