Sans lay on his back, covered in blankets, while Frisk happily snuggled on his chest. Minutes passed in sweet silence.
“that was a hell of a way to spend an afternoon,” Sans said.
Frisk laughed. Truer words were never spoken.
I love you, Sans.
Well, okay, some words may have been more true. Frisk hummed happily.
“Agreed,” they said. “I really hope to do that again sometime.”
“maybe not quite so much abuse of your time powers, though,” he said.
They grinned. That did not sound like a no. In fact, that sounded like agreement. This was a very, very good sign.
“It was a lot of fun, you have to admit,” they said.
“that i do,” he said. “also gotta admit, i feel like a bit of a hypocrite. got on your case, and was hostile towards flowey way back when, over not taking resets seriously. and then, literally as soon as i have access to it myself in any way…”
They laughed and hugged him close. Flowey would have just loved to hear that particular admission, but they weren’t going to tell him.
“You were totally distracted,” they said.
“true,” he said. “and most loops weren’t longer than a couple of minutes. and we weren’t interacting with anyone, so no one else really lost anything.”
Was he really going to just start accepting everything? That’s how Frisk had seen it for ages. It was kind of erasing people if they’d actually done something different in the loop, they understood that, but it didn’t feel like they were messing with the world at large. Only those they interacted with, or affected in any way.
And speaking of the lengths of loops…
“Yeah,” they said in a biting tone. “Some loops were even unreasonably short.”
“seemed pretty reasonable to me,” he said with a grin.
God that had been fun. Still. They poked him and he laughed.
His laugh faded into silence, broken only by the sound of breathing, in that sweet, still moment. Thoughts echoed in Frisk’s mind.
So many things had changed, in these last hours. Sans had accepted them - on some level, anyway. He had shown them how much he cared about them. He was part of the loops, which meant he was forever. Their connection was unbreakable.
Their heart felt stable, now. Like they could trust him not to destroy them in the ways that mattered; like they could speak to him without fear. He would silence them if he needed to, and if he didn’t, he would listen.
They smiled softly. Trust, a depth of trust like this… it was good.
And so they would speak.
“Hey Sans?” they asked quietly.
“yeah?”
“I want to say something, but I’m afraid it’ll come out the wrong way,” they murmured. “You know I don’t want to push you, to make you uncomfortable or anything, right?”
This was a bit of a delicate point.
“i know,” he said with a sigh.
“I haven’t asked about your past, about the things that weigh on you, because I don’t want you to feel pressured,” they said. “I wanted to leave it up to you, how you wanted to handle all of that. But I am curious. I do want to know. And not just out of selfish curiosity - though there is that - but also because I want you to have someone you can talk to about things.”
He closed his eyes, but didn’t ask them to stop. Didn’t push them away.
“I want you to know that I’m available, always, for that,” they said. “I think you knew that already, though. Thing is, what I saw in your soul…”
He exhaled slowly and his face was tight. They hugged him tighter and he seemed to relax a little. They pressed on.
“I don’t know if you can be happy like this,” they whispered. “I don’t want you to feel alone… to feel lost. I… I don’t want to pressure you. To ask you to tell me things. But I do want you to be okay, Sans. I want you to be happy. I want you to heal.”
No orders, no demands, no requirements, not even asking. Just… just letting him know that they wanted to know, that they loved him, that they supported him, that they were here. That they cared. That it was okay.
There was silence for a moment.
“if you’d said that at any other time, i’d have blown you off,” he said, his eyes still closed.
They’d figured as much, and softly smiled at him.
“earlier today, i would have been distracted by all the sex stuff,” he said. That was also not surprising. “before today, i’d have made jokes or whatever. probably been a little angry at you, and then angry at myself for being angry at you.”
They nodded. They knew this was hard for him. Not why, but it clearly was. To completely isolate himself the way he had, to talk to no one, not even Papyrus…
“it’s not easy to talk about that stuff,” he said. “for lots of reasons. it hurts, but also, it’s really goddamned complicated. so i don’t know what to do. the idea of setting aside a few hours to just say everything… that sounds awful. it hurts to even think about, it’s just way too much. but if i try to say stuff without context, it won’t make any goddamned sense.”
That made sense. They’d felt similarly, when he’d asked about why they’d murdered everyone. How could they answer that, without telling him everything?
And yet, on that first day for this Sans, he didn’t trust Frisk. He wouldn’t accept the emotions, the motives, any of it, without that context. But they trusted him. Even without context, they would understand. They would listen.
“I’m not sure that’s true, though,” they said, trying to phrase things gently still. “I mean, the last bit. Telling me your pet glazbeck died and you’re sad about it wouldn’t be hard to understand, even though glazbeck is something I just made up, you know? It’s the heart of things that matters, not the details. I can just trust you that all the pieces do make sense, even if I don’t immediately know how. And I’m pretty sure you come from another world - I get why that would complicate your history.”
His face relaxed a little more and he looked contemplative.
“how did you figure that out, anyway?” he asked.
They chuckled with gleeful satisfaction. They were right, ha!
“Lots of tiny hints,” they said. “You knew what the sun was with absolute confidence, you recognized me as human immediately, and most monsters, Papyrus included, were clueless. You couldn’t figure out how to ‘go back’ to your home, despite having teleportation, which implied it wasn’t in the underground, yet also weren’t interested in going to the surface anymore, because everything felt pointless with the loops, implying your home wasn’t on the surface, either. You and Papyrus ‘just appeared’ one day, according to folks in Snowdin, without any indication of where you came from.
“Your combat skill and knowledge of EXP and LOVE just did not match up with… I don’t know how to put it… the way society was set up down here? Where, how, could you possibly have gotten that good at killing things? Especially since Undyne’s in charge of the Royal Guards, should be in charge of a lot of combat related stuff, and comments she’s made suggest she didn’t have the faintest idea that you were combat capable. And Flowey’s comments about how quick you were to kill him, especially in the earliest days of the loops? You’re too good at killing things, too quick to choose to do so, seemingly accustomed to it, for a society of cinnamon buns. And you have a clear scientific background that, among other things, relates to studying spacetime related stuff. No idea if you’re from the future, or past, or an alternate universe, or what, but it seemed the only thing that matched.”
He seemed amused.
“you weren’t surprised at all when i admitted to having killed before, were you?” he asked.
“Nope,” they said, then realized that wasn’t quite right. “I mean, sort of. I was surprised you told me.”
He chuckled.
Maybe… worth mentioning another thing they’d guessed. Gently, still.
“I… admit I would be surprised to find out you’ve only killed one person,” they said, and he sighed.
“you’re right about that, too,” he said. “i… it’s not easy to talk about that stuff, though, frisk.”
“I get that,” they said. How could they not? “But it’s not easy to live like this, either, is it?”
His face tightened a little and he hugged them close again. They stayed like that for a minute, held in his arms.
“no, it’s not,” he said, in a soft tone.
It hurt to hear that. It wasn’t surprising, but still, it hurt. They wanted him to be happy, and this… he wasn’t, they had to fix this, they had to!
“Then tell me,” they said, their voice rough. “Whenever, however, in whatever sized chunks you want. Please don’t feel alone, Sans.”
Maybe this was pushing too hard - they were telling him to do something, but they… what else could they do?
He sighed and was silent for a time.
“i wasn’t always alone,” he murmured. “it’s probably hard to believe, but i… if i weren’t a moron, i would have been married. or at least engaged.”
It actually worked…? He was…
Frisk froze, suddenly afraid of screwing things up. But no. No, it was okay. They stroked his chest as he spoke, making sure he knew that they were listening, that they cared.
“i thought, even despite the war, i thought we had all the time in the world,” he said, pain clear in his voice.
They did kind of get what he meant about context. What war? With whom? Was he a soldier of some kind - was that where his experience came from?
And… he’d been in love. The right way. He’d had hope for the future. Which was very unlike the Sans of today. Frisk’s heart ached at where this was going.
“i was wrong,” he said, his voice rough. “i never even got to say goodbye.”
Frisk squeezed him tightly. It hurt to hear this, but they were so glad he was saying it.
“today was the first time i’ve… any of this… since then,” he said. “i keep being reminded of her. of us. today, i mean.”
The last time he’d been with someone, it was in that other world. And it had been a thing of love, of hope. And today, by comparison, it was two broken souls colliding.
They swallowed.
When they’d told him they loved him… the pain on his face, his reaction… it made sense, now. He’d lost her. But… the way he lost her, it mattered. They weren’t sure how to ask, but they felt they needed to.
“I… with you being from somewhere else, there’s a few things that could mean,” they said carefully. “Is she okay?”
“she was, last i saw her,” he said, to their relief. “but that was years ago.”
She was one of the reasons he’d wanted to go back, then. He could at least hope that she was okay. Frisk was glad for that hope.
“almost everyone else i knew is dead,” he said, the pain thick in his voice.
God. What could they say…?
Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.
“but i can’t tell papyrus,” he continued, his voice desolate. “he thinks they’re all okay. that we’d all just get back together again, if ever we made it home.”
Flowey’s words about how much he’d lied to Papyrus echoed in their mind. Frisk had said he had reasons, and they were right. Maybe not good reasons, but they understood.
“he thinks that because that’s what i told him,” he said, sounding as though it were a deathbed confession, his soul pouring out onto them. They continued to touch him gently. “i lied to him, over and over, practically his entire life. one day, he’s gonna figure out what death is, figure out what probably happened. i keep lying, keep misdirecting him, keep putting it off, but-”
His words broke off. Not like he trailed off, but like his throat closed and he couldn’t speak. They continued to touch him, unsure of what else to do.
This situation wasn’t a good one. And unlike the loss of his would-be-fiance, the situation with Papyrus wasn’t resolved… that wouldn’t end well.
Still. He cared. And even if he was making some wrong choices, he was doing it because he wanted things to be okay. Frisk knew that feeling.
“I understand,” Frisk whispered.
He squeezed them tightly to his chest and their heart ached with a blend of joy and pain. This was real. Not a thing of comforting them, or just doing what he felt needed to be done, or checking off a box. In this moment, it was a connection more… human, they supposed, than the magic they’d played with earlier. Mortal, maybe? Regardless, there were no walls between them now. They’d come back, Frisk was sure, but now?
They smiled as they embraced him back. There was silence, for a time. A simple sharing of connection, of pain, of unspoken love.
But… they couldn’t just fix things, but maybe they should try to acknowledge the mess he was in? In a supportive and helpful way? A low pressure, full acceptance, whatever-he-wants kind of support?
“Alphys couldn’t handle things until she had support,” Frisk said, after thinking about how to phrase it. “Papyrus understood that. You saw how gentle and accepting he was. Something’s going to happen with this situation eventually, but maybe there’s some time. Maybe you can talk things through with me, try to get everything to hurt less, and make a plan for how you want things to go? I don’t want the fear of that ticking time bomb to hold you. But whatever you want to do, I’m… I’m here for you, Sans.”
He let out another slow breath, seeming thoughtful for a moment, and then gave them a tight hug again.
“i know,” he said. “it’s been an insane mess to get us in this situation, where you’re here for me like this, but i can’t help but appreciate it.”
It had been an insane mess, their journey to this point.
“Yeah,” Frisk laughed softly.
Some of that journey had been better than others. The first of the sex loops, and the hesitation on Sans’ face, how he didn’t want to forget having sex with them for the first time.
Or… or the very first Sans…
Guilt tore at them at the memory of that last goodbye and they sighed.
“I’m so glad you remember now,” they said. “I still feel guilty about what I’d done to the first Sans, when I refused to try to get him to remember, after coming up with the genocide idea. There are so many things I wish you remembered.”
“hey, don’t worry about it,” he said. “this is probably the only way things could’ve worked out. can you imagine any way at all that first sans could have done what we just did?”
Frisk blinked.
They hadn’t thought of that. They hadn’t thought about that at all.
That first Sans… he’d been so gentle with them. After that little stalking prank, anyway. Lighthearted jokes, playful stuff. The harshest thing he’d ever said was the thing about how he’d have killed them if it weren’t for his promise, and that felt like he’d only said it because he’d cracked a little under his own pressures and anxieties.
This Sans had deliberately pushed them, twisted the knife, from the day they met. But it was because he knew what they’d done, had a better sense of what they could handle. That first Sans… he’d have never hurt them. Not because he couldn’t, but because he cared about Frisk, and that first Frisk couldn’t have handled it.
Hell, this Sans struggled to hurt them, even knowing their history, even knowing they wanted him to kill them. That admission was one of the first things they’d ever told him. During those trials, they saw the discomfort on his face, the regret. He’d mentioned the feeling of guilt from burning out their heart.
Was there any way at all that first Frisk, that first Sans, could have ever ended up doing this?
There really wasn’t.
If they’d tried, they’d have failed. And maybe concluded it was impossible.
So… the choice they made… was this the only way…?
“I… guess not,” they said, feeling kind of overwhelmed by the realization.
Sans chuckled.
“i’m glad we did all that,” he said. “so, while it’s been a whole mess… i’m glad for it all. you don’t have to be alone anymore, barring flowey. i don’t have to feel like things are pointless because of the resets thing.”
More hammer blows, of the best kind. On their mind, their heart, their everything.
And… and did that mean…
“You… you think I made the right choice, to go and kill everyone?” they asked.
“i have no clue,” he said. “all i know is that the choices you made brought us here. this is a good moment, a success i can’t imagine we could have had otherwise, y’know? and however we got here, i’m glad we did.”
He was glad for the choices they made. Maybe what they did wasn’t right, and well… yeah. But he was glad anyway. He was glad for today. He was glad for all of it - for who they were, for what they’d done, for the choices they’d made, for the love they had for him.
At least, that’s what it sounded like. It couldn’t be real, could it?
“You’re happy for today, happy for me being like this, you’re… good with everything?” Frisk asked, their heart trembling. “Really?”
Sans sighed, a heavy sound.
“i don’t know how i’ll feel about things tomorrow,” he said. “but right now? yeah.”
Which meant that, while he might tangle himself up in knots, on some level he really was glad for it all.
Funny, how much the joy of feeling accepted could hurt. Good thing they liked pain! They squeaked happily and nuzzled into his chest.
He seemed maybe less happy, though. He grew more tense, the lines of his face going tight.
“i’m probably going to regret saying this, but whatever,” he said, with an odd, sort of frustrated tone to his voice. “even if i decide that this is all wrong and everything, don’t forget something.”
They looked up at him curiously and he met their gaze. They melted at the way he looked at them. Like he was really seeing them, like they weren’t just some person, or even a friend, but like he was taking in all that they were.
Beyond his words or actions, just in the look on his face, they knew how much they meant to him and their heart flew.
“this matters to me,” he said. “you being there for me like this, it matters. even if i do my usual crap of pushing you away, i don’t actually want you to go.”
And that was it, then. They never had to fear him pushing them away, not really. They could always be available to him. They could always know that on some level, it was welcome.
They smiled and softly stroked at his cheek again, the only way they knew how to “kiss” him.
“I’ll always be here for you, Sans,” they said.
The way his breath caught revealed things in a way his face never could, but even that was overshadowed by the way he crushed them to his chest. He was pulling them close so hard it actually hurt a little, and they couldn’t help but giggle at that.
But their amusement was nothing to their joy. A happy, humming sound emerged from them as they just savored this feeling.
“i know,” he said, and it sounded like faith and certainty in his voice.
His grip grew looser as he relaxed. This was such a good and sweet moment. They felt so happy, laying here like this. His breaths grew deeper and slower.
After a while, they thought he’d fallen asleep. They were kind of curious if he really was.
“Sans?” they whispered, and he didn’t react at all.
They lightly touched his face, and likewise, there was no reaction.
Their heart surged with joy again. They remembered what Flowey had said - that his naps were a lie. Which, naturally, was just Flowey whining, but it meant that Sans didn’t sleep deeply enough to even be killed by a surprise attack, in Flowey’s experience, at least outside of his room. And, even with notable hostility motivating him, and infinite tries, he never managed to catch Sans actually sleeping, not even once.
It wasn’t that Frisk didn’t already know that Sans trusted them more than others, that he was paranoid about issues of his own safety, and all that. And yet, it just… it felt good to have this. To know that Sans really and truly felt safe with them.
It was a good way to be. With another happy hum, Frisk made sure the blankets were well positioned, and snuggled into the odd, semi-real squish of his chest. Naps were nice, and there was nowhere they’d rather be.
----------------------------------------
Their consciousness stuttered into place, with a few odd noises pulling their awareness forward. They blinked blearily and saw Sans stumble for no reason they could see.
“Sans?” they managed to mumble out, trying to wake up. “Are you okay?”
“of course,” he said, sounding completely casual and normal. “why wouldn’t i be?”
Did he really think that would fool them? They couldn’t help but smile at him, despite the exasperation. Hopefully he wouldn’t completely try to disregard what had happened between them.
“gotta lot of things to think about from today,” he went on, still sounding entirely normal. “i don’t know how long we slept. hope you didn’t have any plans that got messed up.”
No matter how normal he pretended things were, Frisk knew better, all the way to their bones. He wouldn’t push them away, even if he tried. It was a giddy feeling.
“I made sure the entire evening was free,” Frisk said, amused. “No rush on my account.”
“good, that’s good,” he said, his casual tone starting to crack away, amusing them further. “me, uh. me, too. no plans, i mean. i think i’ll just drop you off and go home and kinda think about things.”
Just in case he was pressuring himself in a silly way…
“If you don’t want to be alone while you’re thinking, I would be happy to stay with you,” they said, keeping their tone gentle.
He closed his eyes and turned around, his back to them. He just seemed to breathe for a moment. They frowned in concern. Was he okay…?
“i think i need to be alone for a bit,” he said.
Maybe they could reassure him?
They got up and shook out their arms, fully waking up as they walked over to him. Weird how comfortable they felt being naked with him, beyond the fact that he couldn’t see. They smiled as they reached him. No reaction, but of course he knew they were there. They put their hands on his shoulders lightly, softly.
“Please don’t feel afraid, or uncertain, or anything like that, about calling on me,” they murmured. “For anything.”
“i know,” he said. “no promises about how i’ll feel, but i know anything like that is completely on my end.”
At least he was being self aware about it all.
“I guess that’s good enough,” they said, laughing wryly.
He took another moment to just stand there and breathe. They wondered what he was thinking. They wondered if it would be bad to ask. It was silent while they struggled to decide what to do, but then he spoke.
“i’m not going to completely fall back into old habits or anything,” he said. “some things have totally changed. i just need to try to wrap my head around everything. it’s, uh, a lot.”
That was a good point. A lot had happened today. For Frisk, mostly what had happened was getting… well, basically everything they wanted. It was the best day of their life by such a wide margin, everything else they’d ever known seemed empty. As though this was the first day of the rest of their life.
For Sans, though… yeah. His morals, his linear existence in time, the way he thought about Frisk… so much had changed. It hopefully wasn’t bad, they certainly didn’t think so, but it was a lot.
“Yeah, it is,” they said. “And… whatever you end up deciding, or feeling about it all… for what it’s worth, I’m so incredibly happy for today. For everything.”
And they really, really hoped they’d do it again. But it wasn’t their choice… it was his to decide if and when they would know that pleasure again.
His hand reached up and rested on theirs, on his shoulder.
“i know,” he said in a low tone. “go ahead and grab your stuff. i’ll take you to your room.”
“Thanks,” they said.
Definitely best to go straight home, with no extra stops along the way, what with the whole naked thing. Straight to their room, too - Toriel should be home by now. They moved over and packed up the extra pie pieces that weren’t used in this timeline, and grabbed their phone, wallet, and keys.
Sans remained standing there, unmoving, as they grabbed everything. Hopefully he just needed a little time.
“I’m ready,” they said.
With an odd sort of slowness, he turned around and looked at them. They froze at the look on his face. Emotions could be hard to make out on his face sometimes - his eyes were expressive, but the lack of other hints, like eyebrows or lips, was not helpful - and yet, something in his gaze burned fiercely. A possessive sort of intensity, as though he were consuming them, as though they were falling into the void of his eyes.
Naked they were before that gaze, in every sense of the word.
He simply stared at them like that for a long moment. He could stare as long as he liked, and they would let him see their love.
Still, as time passed, they began to wonder again if everything was okay.
“Sans?” they asked uncertainly.
“er, uh, yeah, uh, let’s go,” he said abruptly, blinking, and approached them.
A flicker of black brought them to their room.
“yep, so, we’ll talk later. see ya,” he said, and didn’t even wait for their response before teleporting away.
Hmph. He really was having trouble, wasn’t he? They smiled a little to themself.
They wondered exactly what kind of trouble he was having and their grin broadened.
Now that he wasn’t present and dominating their thoughts with focusing on him, thinking about his mental state, and all that…
Oh, these memories…
The memories surged within them, taking them, commanding them, tearing them apart… just like their contents… mmm…
Their hand slid down as they moved into bed, but as they stroked, it was so unsatisfying. It felt so… empty and weak. Their smile faded. Could they even cum like this anymore?
Or were they now so addicted to Sans’ cock, his tongue, his power, that they were helpless, unable to achieve satisfaction any other way, and would have to beg to ever be able to cum again and…
Oh, these thoughts were not helping. They moaned as they tried again, fruitlessly, to feel any measure of satisfaction from their own touch.
“Frisk? Are you home?” Toriel asked, sounding surprised, and Frisk eeped a little.
Right, they’d totally forgotten that they shared this house with someone. It sounded like Toriel had walked over to their door to ask, but hadn’t opened it out of respect for their privacy.
“Yes! Uh! I took a nap!” Frisk called back, and Toriel laughed lightly.
“That is good. You should come out soon,” Toriel said. “I am making dinner. I would love to hear about your day.”
With that, Frisk heard Toriel patter off to the kitchen.
They started giggling at what just happened, and that turned into belly laughter.
Yeah, they were not going to be telling Toriel about their day. It was almost a shame, that the best day of their life, the best moments of their life, had to be a secret. Still. They could remain at a simmer, in case Sans decided he wanted to do something about that - a thought which made their belly clench delightfully - and in the meantime, chat with one of the nicest people in the world.