I leave the house and walk to the subway entrance, walk down the stairs full of people and just look straight ahead ignoring everyone. I pay my subway ticket and sit on a chair waiting for the train to come.

I put earphones in my ears and listen to some music, looking at the train tracks and the cold from there penetrates my spine.

Next to me sits a girl from the same school, I can tell by the uniform she's wearing. She looks into her phone and I simply lift my head up looking at the ceiling and close my eyes.

After about 5 minutes I hear the train approaching the station so I open my eyes and wait for it to stop. Once it has stopped I step inside and sit on a chair, keeping my eyes closed the whole way.

I hear the robotic voice saying I have arrived at my desired station so I get up from my seat and exit the train, stepping out of the train I see the same girl suddenly turn around with her eyes in her phone but I didn't notice.

Walking up the stairs to get out of the subway tunnel the air gets cleaner so I take a deep breath in and exhale to relax.

I cross the street and get to the school, entering the schoolyard everyone looks at me like I'm a freak. Is it so wrong to have earphones in my ears?

Yet I ignore them and walk into the school, entering my classroom and sit quietly in my desk waiting for class to start so I can feel more relieved.

I'm looking into my phone when I notice two hands on my desk and when I look up it's that one girl from the subway.

"Hey, what's up?"

I look at her and sit in silence and then I look back into my phone and go about my business, at which point she pulls the earphones out of my ears.

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"What's up?"

Again I look at her and just get up from the seat, leaving her to talk to herself, walking down the school hallway the other people look at me strangely, as if I really am a freak.

My facial expression remained neutral, however I felt something in my heart, something strange but safe, I really don't know what to say to this feeling so I just ignore it.

The bell rings so I hurry back into the classroom and walk past that girl who stops in place and watches me walk into the classroom.

Sitting down in my desk the teacher walks into the classroom with a smile on her face, strange to see her smiling but whatever, it's none of my business how she feels.

The teacher opens the class catalogue and calls out to us in alphabetical order.

"Fujimoto Ren"

"Present"

These names, they ring in my head like a bullet, no, like more bullets going through my brain but yet I don't die from them. It Eventually she calls out my name to let me know I'm present.

"Ishikawa Renji"

I stand up and reply with present and then sit back down in the desk as the teacher continues to mark absences and so on.

Finally the teacher tells us to take out a sheet of paper because we are giving a test, honestly I don't love tests but I can't help but do them for a good score.

I take out a sheet of paper and she writes the formulas on the board and I start writing the exercises on the board and then I start solving them. Before I do that though, I see my classmates copying from their notebooks and phones.

Maybe that's why this class is called, the classroom of cheaters. I'm not a fan of cheating either, although I have done it a few times, but not as much as they have, generally in this school there is a problem with cheating on tests but no one suspects me because I study enough to get a reasonable score.

I'm glad I'm not a proponent of this false method of learning. The hour has passed and I have finished the test so I put it on the teacher's desk who smiles at me. I go back to my desk and sit looking out the window in silence.

After all the students bring in their test sheets the teacher leaves the classroom smiling, in her absence I pull out my phone and watch videos on the internet to occupy my time while the others talk amongst themselves.

One of my classmates comes up to me and says hello and I just look at my phone and ignore him. He sees me ignoring him and shouts loudly that I'm a loser.

Everyone starts laughing, even the people in the school hallway but I choose to shut up and watch my videos on the internet.

I put my phone down and get up from the desk, walking down the hall to the bathroom and everyone looks at me laughing. I really don't understand this school anymore, I don't wear glasses, I'm not the best at teaching so I really have no idea why everyone keeps laughing.

Walking to the bathroom I look in the mirror and then at the bathroom door which opens and there is a boy washing his hands and leaving the bathroom.

I turn on the water and splash water on my face, the cold water makes me shiver a little but I continue splashing water on my face and then turn off the water wiping my face with some toilet paper.

The sound of the lights on the ceiling hit me again, making me anxious so I leave the bathroom and walk back to class sitting in my desk and sitting quietly until the next class starts.

Looking out the window I see the leaves of the trees flutter in the spring wind. Maybe at some point, I'll be able to enjoy these trees without a hole in my heart.