“Very nice sword, indeed,” Francis said while wielding Kevin and admiring its edge and details.
WELL, MORTAL, DON’T THINK THAT SOME FLATTERY WILL SAVE YOUR SOUL YET! THIS GREAT KEVIN’S KINDNESS IS UNPARALLELED, BUT IT WILL TAKE WAY MORE TO APPEASE ITS ANGER AFTER YOUR PREVIOUS INSULTS!
Francis carefully gave back the sword to Jacob, giving him a very long glance. Jacob shot back one that said, ‘I know, I know’.
…
After almost an hour of climbing, Jacob made them stop.
Thanks to Kevin, he could now carry much more things around without having to worry about space.
Jacob made a huge piece of parchment materialize in mid-air and carefully arranged it on the ground. He had managed to get some iron dust from a very small hardware store in St. Peter.
He deposited the iron dust and took out a huge vial of blood and a big brush that he had fashioned himself out of the wolves’ fur.
“So, that thing tells us whether there is an iron vein?” Francis looked to the huge piece of parchment, almost as tall as Jacob.
“Nope. It will tell us whether we have some significant portion of mineral ore close that resembles iron. There might be some magic minerals that don’t have any iron in them, and we would be screwed.”
“What? Really? And what are you going to do in that case?” Francis asked, surprised that Jacob would be so unprepared.
“Just take out the other mineral dust samples I have and try with those,” Jacob smiled sneakily, “what, you thought I would come without anything else? What am I, an amateur? Kid, you better learn how to respect your elders.”
“You know,” Francis noted, “when you think about it. The fact that you are actually thousands, or God knows how many years old, makes it way worse. You should be all elderly and wise, instead, you still behave like a child. It’s really surprising. In a way, you might even be more childish than the old Jacob I was used to. Your jokes certainly got worse.”
“Well, the younger, the better. I need to keep myself sharp to avoid getting decrepit, you know. And what’s better than acting like a youngster!”
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“Are you saying ‘youngster’ to appear older, now?” Francis couldn’t help but notice how Jacob was incredible at multi-tasking. While he joked around, his hands moved independently of his mouth on the parchment, creating a complex array of symbols around a central circle that was left empty, probably meant for the dust.
“Are you saying youngster to appear older, now?” Jacob copied Francis’s tone.
Francis gave him a long and meaningful stare before speaking again.
“How you got that Devil with a supermodel body to like—no, love you, will remain the greatest mystery in mankind’s history. You know, I actually admire how you tricked that woman into loving you so much. You are like Loki, the trickster God. That could be your true identity. Irritating, edgy, childish. You can’t deny it quite fits the bill, doesn’t it?”
“Oh, go fuck yourself, Frank,” Jacob grumbled, not pleased by the comparison. “I can be mature whenever I want, I’ll let you know that!”
“So, you do not actually deny you are Loki, the loser trickster? Mh, thought so,” Francis posed in all his fake-wiseness with a hand under his chin.
“I’ll whoop your ass here, and now, I swear,” Jacob said with a satisfied smile toward him. He was still working on the Formation, even without looking at it.
“I’ll tell my mom,” Francis replied with an identical smile.
“I’ll tell my mom,” Jacob copied his tone, “well, it’s elementary school all over again. What now, are we going to discuss the Pokemon problem again?”
“Well, you did not want to trade that Steelix back, Jake. You are a brazen criminal; and if my mother hadn’t intervened, you would have gotten away with it.”
“Once again, my evil designs fooled by a crazy woman,” Jacob snorted, “story of my life.”
“I should probably relay that to Epagogia. She will be pleased to hear it,” Francis got an evil grin on his face.
“Oh, don’t you dare!” Jacob actually stopped working on the Formation, really affected by what Francis had just threatened him with.
“I do dare. Oh, Jake, I dare so much,” Francis rubbed his own hands, “imagine how happy she will be of being called crazy. She’s such a reasonable woman, though. I’m sure she will take it swimmingly.”
“If ‘swimmingly’ means that she will hang me naked from a cliff, sure. She most definitely will take it swimmingly.”
“I’ll tell you what,” Francis said, “if you apologize to me while referring me as master—no, great master Francis, and plead for a bit with some tears in your eyes, I will forgive you. Ah, got yourself a great deal, buddy.”
Jacob looked at Francis deadpanned for a few seconds before raising his arm and shooting a Fireball toward his friend’s crotch.
“OH! OUCH! STOP! WHAT ARE YOU, CRAZY?”
The Fireball had been quite weak, more of a scare than a real threat, but Francis never joked around his family jewels.
“Well, let’s say that if you do tattle, buddy, I will make sure that your parents will not have any grandchildren, how about that, huh?”
Jacob held another Fireball in his hands while smiling cruelly toward Francis.
“Always, the bully, you old geezer! Well, just get back to work then, we have humanity to save, you old goat,” Francis spoke all these words while keeping his hands in front of his crotch, protecting himself from a potential strike.