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Surviving the Succession (A Transmigration Fantasy)
Book 2 Chapter 15-And Each Man Must Pay His Dues

Book 2 Chapter 15-And Each Man Must Pay His Dues

Character Index

Hu Qing/Liang Hongfei: The younger half-brother of Minister Liang and the rightful heir of the Liang clan, he had his position usurped by his older half-brother while still an infant, and was raised to do the dirty work of the clan and denied a formal education. After growing dissatisfied with the disrespect he faced in his household, he entered Kayla's service after saving her from an assassin, and the two became quick friends in the aftermath.

Sir Zheng: A eunuch who works in the palace.

Jia Fu: An official in the Ministry of Justice and one of the Grand Duke's men. He was successfully fooled by the three-man act of Sun Ruhui, Xiang Daozong, and Zhang Dingyong into leaking information on the Liang clan's deal with the Grand Duke's faction in order to bury Hu Qing's true identity, believing that he could delay the investigation and his own demise by doing so.

Liang Shen: Minister of Justice and one of the Seventh Prince's supporters. He practically raised Hu Qing, convincing the world that his younger half-brother was in fact his illegitimate nephew.

Liang Bailu: Older brother of Liang Shen, he passed away many years prior due to ill health. Due to Hu Qing's lingering gratitude and sentiments towards Liang Shen, Kayla agreed to use Liang Bailu as the scapegoat for Liang Shen's plans.

Housekeeper Li: Formerly known as Matron Li, a loyal female servant who has a strong hatred of the Grand Duke and great affection for Wenyuan, who she watched grow up.

Xianchun: The Seventh Prince, he was manipulated by Kayla's plots into distancing himself from his strategist, and was subsequently drawn into the plot to kill the Grand Duke.

Liu Boyue: The Seventh Prince's childhood friend and loyal strategist. His relationship with the Seventh Prince grew strained when Kayla indirectly revealed that Liu Boyue had been acting behind Xianchun's back. Despite his brilliance, he did not suspect Kayla of doing so on purpose due to Wenyuan having no way of knowing he existed.

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Hu Qing entered the palace, his steps slow but sure on the ground. He was not afraid, though he was careful not to show it. The plan would work out, just as Zhao Wenyuan’s plans always tended to, regardless of what complications or betrayals arose. Perhaps that was more faith than was warranted for his employer, especially since Hu Qing had joined him specifically on account of how pathetic and beleaguered Zhao Wenyuan was at the time, but Hu Qing had never been one to shy away from questionable decisions.

“Sir Hu, we will be arriving at the Empress Dowager’s quarters in a moment, please prepare yourself,” Sir Zheng said quietly over his shoulder. Hu Qing gave him a curious look.

“I’m meeting with the Empress Dowager?”

“Yes, and His Majesty the Emperor will also be present,” Sir Zheng replied.

Hu Qing nodded, thinking back to his first meeting with the Empress Dowager a few months ago.

“Please try to stay calm as much as you can, and watch what you say and do before them. But there’s no need to be overly nervous,” Sir Zheng assured him.

“Thank you for the advice, Sir Zheng,” Hu Qing said politely. Sir Zheng gave him an encouraging smile.

“Here we are now,” Sir Zheng said. The eunuch quickened his steps and entered before Hu Qing, raising his voice to announce their arrival. Only after the eunuch turned his head slightly towards him did Hu Qing step over the threshold.

The Empress Dowager’s quarters looked very different in the light of day, and the air of the entire place seemed to be colder than before. Hu Qing stepped forward to the spot where the eunuch was subtly gesturing to and knelt, careful not to raise his eyes.

“This lowly commoner Hu Qing humbly greets His Majesty the Emperor and Her Highness the Empress Dowager! May His Majesty live for ten thousands of years, may Her Highness live for thousands of years!” Hu Qing said, keeping his voice steady as he bowed his head to the ground.

“Please rise.” The calm, confident voice of the Emperor rang out, and Hu Qing quickly complied. With measured cautiousness, he slowly lifted his eyes to look up at the members of the Imperial family. The Emperor was regarding him with friendly eyes, and the Empress Dowager’s face was completely blank.

“Hu Qing, was it? I recall that you serve my nephew as a guard,” the Emperor said.

Hu Qing nodded. “That’s right, Your Majesty. I am currently employed in Lord Zhao’s service.”

The Emperor gave a small smile at the mention of his favorite nephew. “Hu Qing, do you know why you’ve been summoned here today?”

Hu Qing hesitated, gulping nervously. “I heard that it was related to the lock down at the Ministry of Justice and…the…the rumors spreading in the city.”

The Emperor nodded for him to go on.

“About my…parentage,” Hu Qing said tentatively.

“And do you think there is any truth to those rumors?” The Empress Dowager asked, her voice silkily soft.

She’s testing my involvement, Hu Qing noted. No, more likely, she’s testing Wenyuan’s involvement.

“I don’t know,” Hu Qing said, lacing his voice with sincerity. “I was told that my mother was a courtesan who was taken in as an outside mistress. She died soon after I was born, so my uncle took me under his care. Whatever happened in the previous generation, I know nothing of it.”

“The current rumors are very damaging to the Liang clan, as well as to the reputation of the Ministry of Justice. If they cannot be verified, then it will account to slander against Minister Liang,” the Empress Dowager continued.

Hu Qing nodded in agreement. “My uncle is a righteous man, this must be the plot of shameless, small-minded men who wish to disarm him as the bearer of justice! Please do not believe in their false accusations, Your Highness!”

The Empress Dowager’s eyes narrowed slightly at his vehement defense of Liang Shen.

“How unusual. You do realize that the rumors place you as the rightful heir of the Liang clan? And yet you defend your uncle without a second thought?” She asked. The Emperor remained quiet, taking in Hu Qing’s reaction.

Yeah? Who’s the expert at reading expressions here? Hu Qing gave her a slightly wounded look.

“My uncle practically raised me as one of his own, even though I was born of such a lowly background. How could I possibly stand by any attempt to smear his name?” Hu Qing said.

He didn’t need to either. The rumors had spread far and wide thanks to Jia Fu, and the frenzied lock down that Minister Liang had tripped into face-first only hammered the nails into the coffin. The palace had to investigate, and they had to come to the right conclusion. The people of the capital would cry foul play otherwise.

And the evidence is already there, at the top of the pile. Who cares if it’s too lucky to be a coincidence? It’s still true.

“You are a generous-minded man,” the Emperor said. “This is a serious matter, and the palace is also obligated to inquire into its truthfulness. We examined the documents present at the Ministry of Justice in order to examine the rumors that Liang Shen had usurped your position with the help of the late Grand Duke Zhao, and found it to be false.”

Hu Qing brightened up, relief painted over his face.

“However, some parts of the rumor were true. You are indeed the son of the late Lord Liang, and your mother was his wife. Liang Hongfei, you are the rightful heir of the Liang clan,” the Emperor declared.

Hu Qing froze in shock, glancing between the Emperor and Empress Dowager in bewilderment. He looked to Sir Zheng for help, but the eunuch carefully avoided his gaze.

“What? B-but–my mother, she was a courtesan, wasn’t she? How could she possibly be a formal wife?” Hu Qing asked. He didn’t bother feigning ignorance on the late Lord Liang being his father–the Empress Dowager had already picked up on that in their first meeting, it would be foolish to double back on that now.

“Your mother was indeed a courtesan, but your father had raised her status prior to their marriage,” the Empress Dowager said, her eyes scanning Hu Qing’s face for any hint of deception. “You were lied to.”

Hu Qing paled, rearing back as though he had been physically struck.

“Th-then…” he said weakly.

“You are the rightful Lord of the Liang clan,” the Empress Dowager confirmed. “Your brother Liang Shen has deceived you. The deal with the Grand Duke did indeed take place, and though it was not by his hand, but rather that of Liang Bailu, he was complicit in keeping you in the dark.”

This is bait. She wants to see if I’ll try to bite at him, and then she can needle at me until this is revealed to be Wenyuan’s plot, Hu Qing thought. Like hell I’m going to fall for that. Not to mention, I was the one who changed the culprit from him to Bailu, why would I screw him over now?

“B-but even if that’s the case, I’m sure he had no choice in the matter,” Hu Qing said weakly.

“How so? You do realize that he bears responsibility in a crime, of which you are the victim?” The Empress Dowager asked, prodding at him further.

Hu Qing shook his head with a devastated expression. “He raised me with great care and affection, one would not do that to someone for whom they had no love. My uncle–my brother Bailu died soon after my birth, the deal must have already been cemented by then. Is it not a brotherly duty to preserve the reputation of one’s siblings after their passing? My brother–Minister Liang…he must have been at a loss of what to do with such a burdensome choice foisted upon him, and yet he bore the weight alone for all these years,” Hu Qing said pitifully, sounding for all intents and purposes like a wounded woodland animal. “He…he must have had no other choice.”

“What remarkable loyalty to one's kin,” the Emperor remarked. “The Liang clan’s cohesiveness continues to impress me. There is no need to fear. Your brother is a dutiful official who has served me well, and I would be remiss to punish him if I could help it.”

Hu Qing perked up at the words, eyes lighting up with hopefulness.

“I also believe that he was caught in a difficult situation, unable to go either left or right, and made a regrettable decision as a result. Revoking his Lordship is punishment enough,” the Emperor said. “As for you, it is time that you were reinstated to your birthright.”

“Your Majesty, I am grateful beyond words for your benevolence, but I am unworthy of such a title! I did not take a formal education and am unqualified for a position of Lordship,” Hu Qing protested.

“Your brother was misguided in denying you a proper education,” the Emperor remarked disapprovingly. Hu Qing was almost certain now that Liang Shen was indeed present somewhere in the room.

“However, you have demonstrated great loyalty and strength of character in your service of the Liang clan, as well as in your service of Zhao Wenyuan. I trust that you have the virtue to bear this title,” the Emperor said firmly.

“Y-your Majesty,” Hu Qing said weakly.

“Do not protest what you were intended for,” the Emperor said, not unkindly. “You will be Lord with my blessings, and your brother will support you to make up for his past misdeeds.” The final sentence was uttered more as a command than a suggestion.

It’s just as Wenyuan said, the Emperor wants to strengthen the neutral faction no matter the cost. Even if it comes at the price of the Seventh Prince’s influence, the Emperor will prioritize the position of the ones who actually answer to him.

“I dare not refuse Your Majesty’s orders,” Hu Qing said, bowing his head. “This lowly subject humbly accepts.”

“Very good,” the Emperor said approvingly. “I look forward to your future accomplishments.”

“I will do my best to meet your expectations!” Hu Qing said, lowering his head further.

“Excellent,” the Empress Dowager cut in. Her voice was gentle, but Hu Qing instinctively felt the urge to tense up. “Then we will proceed with the formal arrangements, and you will soon return to the Liang household as its Lord. On that note, perhaps you should discuss the details with Minister Liang.”

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

The Emperor’s eyes flickered with displeasure, but he did not interfere. The Empress Dowager swept her fingers in a graceful gesture, and Liang Shen was led out by a eunuch from where he had been standing behind a folding screen.

I knew it, Hu Qing thought in irritation. On the surface, however, he kept up his act.

“Uncl–Brother,” Hu Qing called out, his voice weakening as he switched terms of address. Wincing slightly at the ill-fitting phrase, he awkwardly switched his wording. “Minister.”

“My lord,” Liang Shen said, his voice hoarse with exhaustion. The man looked significantly worse for the wear.

“We will let the two of you speak,” the Empress Dowager said graciously.

“Then we will humbly take our leave, Your Majesty, Your Highness,” Hu Qing said cautiously, kneeling again to bow his head to the ground again, Minister Liang following suit.

The Emperor dismissed them, and the two half-brothers followed Sir Zheng out of the building in stilted silence.

“You may speak here if you wish,” Sir Zheng said, thoughtfully leading them into a quiet courtyard a short distance away. The conversation was certain to be a difficult one, and having it in the Liang household would be a disaster. Having it in the Zhao household would be a catastrophe.

“Thank you, Sir Zheng.” Hu Qing bobbed his head in gratitude.

“Not at all, I will be waiting outside, please call me when you are done,” Sir Zheng replied before leaving them alone. Hu Qing was sure that they were being observed, but they weren’t being listened in on. He stepped into the shade of a tree, politely gesturing for Liang Shen to join him. In that particular spot, they would only be partially visible without seeming suspicious.

“Well, brother, here we are,” Hu Qing said, letting out his breath in a short huff. He glanced at Liang Shen. “It must’ve been quite a fright for you, but it didn’t turn out too terrible now, did it?”

“You spared me,” Liang Shen said disbelievingly. “You know that–”

“That you were the one who plotted everything? Yes, I know,” Hu Qing said casually.

“Was it Zhao Wenyuan’s idea to gain leverage over me?” Liang Shen demanded.

“No, it was mine. I never planned to destroy you,” Hu Qing replied. “Not even once. That was…well, it was never something I was interested in.”

Liang Shen’s eyes shone with unshed tears as he looked at Hu Qing as though seeing him for the first time.

“I meant what I said,” Hu Qing said gently. “I’m grateful.”

Liang Shen let his breath out in a shuddering sigh.

“Hu Qing,” he said shakily, wearily shaking his head. “I mean…Hongfei…”

He trailed off, unable to bring himself to either thank or accuse his brother. The blade cut either way, no matter how it was wielded. What was even left between them now? Mercy? That they had both given. Resentment? There was no real way to measure what they had done and would do to each other. They would both regret sparing each other in due time.

Liang Shen felt like he was floundering, unable to stay afloat in a shallow pool of water. Hu Qing, on the other hand, had a surety to him that Liang Shen had never seen before.

“It’s alright, brother,” Hu Qing said in a reassuring tone. “I’m grateful, and that’s why I’m sparing you. But this is the extent of my gratitude. I won’t give you any more than I already have, it’s your turn to pay up.”

Liang Shen’s brow crinkled in uneasy anticipation. “What do you want?” He asked after a moment.

Hu Qing shook his head slightly, and Liang Shen was struck by how similar the movement looked to Zhao Wenyuan’s.

Of course, no wonder he’s confident. Liang Shen’s realization dawned upon him belatedly. The answer was the same even though the question was different.

Given his education, Hu Qing should have been woefully unprepared for his new change in status, a poor imitation of Minister Liang at best. The younger man had never gotten the chance to shadow his elders in formal settings or witness the intricacies of social interactions among the elite in the Liang household, but it seemed that had changed within the last few months.

Zhao Wenyuan. The name weighed down his thoughts like a rock on a bed of feathers. How long has he been planning this?

“You don’t need to be so worried, brother. It’s a clear road ahead of you. The palace has reinstated me, there’s no going back from that. If you want to protect the Liang clan and preserve your own reputation, then you’ll support me. People will speak well of you for it, and you’ll retain most of your influence. If you choose to work against me, well…” Hu Qing shrugged slightly. “News of that will spread pretty quickly, and I won’t stop anyone who wants to take advantage of the chance to smear your name. It’s not really a difficult choice, is it?”

Liang Shen looked at him in surprise.

“Pretty generous deal, isn’t it?” Hu Qing added.

“You want me to support you,” Liang Shen said in disbelief.

Hu Qing nodded. Liang Shen stared at him, a little unsure of what he was hearing. If Hu Qing wanted to solidify his power in the Liang clan, the best way to do that was to isolate and marginalize Liang Shen’s position and claims to legitimacy. Asking for Liang Shen’s support meant allowing him to retain enough influence to be of sway–it felt like a trap.

“I already spared you on one front, why would I only do so halfway? We both appear more legitimate if we present a united front,” Hu Qing said, sensing Liang Shen’s confusion.

“You’re not worried that I would sabotage you?” Liang Shen asked, trying to grasp at Hu Qing’s true intentions.

Hu Qing smiled. “If you do, you’re the one who’s done for. I don’t need to worry about that.”

That was not reassuring at all.

There is always a price for a buy-in. Either it’s already been paid, or it will be. Liang Shen wasn’t sure which would be worse.

Hu Qing patted him on the shoulder, wearing a small smile that was all too reminiscent of Zhao Wenyuan.

“I look forward to working together with you, brother,” he said sincerely.

Liang Shen took a deep breath, knowing that he didn’t really have an option.

“Of course.”

“Then let’s talk this over some more as we move forward with the process,” Hu Qing said with finality. “I’ll return to the Zhao household tonight, but I’ll be coming home properly tomorrow. Is that enough time for you?”

Liang Shen nodded mechanically.

“Good. Let’s go,” Hu Qing said. He went over to the gate and called for Sir Zheng, Liang Shen trailing mutely behind him, still mired in unease.

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Kayla poured out another cup of wine for Hu Qing and then for herself, raising the bottle with a grin. The two had settled in for a small celebration after Hu Qing's triumphant return from the palace. She would've liked to throw him a small party of sorts, but openly celebrating wouldn't reflect well on them.

“Once again, congratulations,” she said warmly. “To your reinstatement.”

“Thanks,” Hu Qing raised his cup slightly and downed it, tilting the empty cup towards Kayla. She rolled her eyes and refilled it.

“Slow down a little, would you?” Kayla remarked.

“And you’re one to talk? You’re drinking straight from the bottle,” Hu Qing shot back.

“I’m just glad that things worked out for you,” she said. “It wasn’t too difficult, was it?”

“Not at all, it was ridiculously easy. You all but put the Lordship right in my hands,” Hu Qing said in amusement.

“Good. Getting to my current spot was a shitty ride for me, but it shouldn’t be for you,” Kayla replied. “Here, have some more.”

Hu Qing held his cup out obediently.

“Are you worried about what comes next?” Kayla asked him.

“Not really. I know what I’m in for,” Hu Qing replied. “But I guess this means no more running around on rooftops and jumping through your windows.”

“A lot of things are going to change,” Kayla agreed. “But some things don’t have to. You can always relax and act however you like around me and the guys.”

Hu Qing nodded. “On that note, are you going to change the name you call me?”

“Do you want me to?” Kayla asked.

“No. The Liang clan’s going to keep reminding me that no matter how high I climb, I’m still the lowly Hu Qing who’s only a little better off than a servant. I want someone to remind me that there were good parts to it as well,” Hu Qing said.

Kayla blinked in surprise at the unexpected sincerity in his voice. “Gladly,” she replied.

Hu Qing finished the snacks on his plate and reached over to keep eating from Kayla’s, a small smile on his face.

“Speaking of, I’ll have someone modify your robes to prevent people from screwing with you,” Kayla said to Hu Qing. “I had Housekeeper Li do mine as soon as I became the Lord. Nothing fancy, you just need to sew a few protection spells into the seams and the insides. I’ll cover the cost and the hush money, so don’t argue with me on this. Don’t go around thinking that you’ll be fine just because you can fight, you never know what can happen.”

Hu Qing nodded. “Alright. Isn’t there any way that I can hide a few knives in there as well?”

“Sure, but you have to remember to take them out before you go to formal events, or you might get arrested on the spot. But if you have some relatively innocuous objects that can double as weapons, I’m sure you have plenty of ways to stash them.”

“I have a few ideas,” Hu Qing said, a hint of malicious glee creeping into his voice.

The two continued drinking, chatting aimlessly as they made their way through the bottle, Hu Qing ignoring that Kayla was taking swigs from it directly. They were steadily getting past tipsiness and into drunken territory. It was the first time Kayla had willingly drank this much since coming to this world, and she was determined to enjoy it.

“It’s not going to be easy, will it?” Hu Qing suddenly asked.

Kayla stopped the bottle halfway to her mouth. “No,” she admitted.

“But it’ll be worth it,” Hu Qing pressed.

Kayla gave a noncommittal shrug. “I want to say yes, but it really depends on you. This is a never ending struggle and the only reward is your participation. There’s nothing I can say to paint that in a better light. But so is everything else. I mean, look at history. No matter how much the people in each dynasty struggle to keep it afloat, it’s still going to end sooner or later. We all say stuff about ‘may the dynasty last for tens of thousands of years’, but we’ll probably get another few centuries out of it at most. There’s probably still at least a thousand years between us and the last dynasty to emerge.”

Hu Qing gave her a bleary look of confusion as he set down his emptied cup. “So? We live in this dynasty, don’t we? What’s the next few got to do with us now?”

Kayla paused, her drunken brain stuttering to a stop as it tried, for some reason, to translate the words into Spanish.

“Can’t argue with that,” Kayla poured out two more cups for each of them, raising her glass to Hu Qing before downing it.

“I don’t think my brother is very happy with me. At least I seem to have left a good impression with the Emperor, though I suspect that’s simply because I work for you,” Hu Qing said. “But the Empress Dowager was rather suspicious, just as you predicted.”

Kayla scoffed, shaking her head. Her anger surged up and spilled out from her lips, aided on by her lowered inhibitions.

“The Empress Dowager gets all suspicious because she mistakes survival for ambition, but she seems to be confusing her own past with mine. I just want to live. Does she even realize how hard that is to do? I just wanted to exist without hurting anyone,” Kayla said, her thoughts flitting to Wenyuan’s miserable existence that trudged on unhappily even after his death. “I think he did too,” she muttered softly.

“The friend you made a plaque for?” Hu Qing asked. She glanced at him, a little surprised at how sharp his eyes were despite their inebriated state only seconds before.

He sure made the connection quickly enough.

“Yes,” Kayla replied. “But we don’t always get to choose these things. I’ve gone so far from what I used to be that I wonder if I actually had it in me all along, or if the position makes the man.”

“You don’t like being a Lord?” Hu Qing gave her a look of bewildered confusion.

“Of course I do. I much prefer being a Lord to being a powerless heir. In case you’ve forgotten, I killed quite a few people to get here. I had you kill quite a few people to get me here, and that doesn’t even include the assassins that Wei Guang ended up silencing,” Kayla replied. She set down the empty bottle with a thunk. “Since I’ve made it this far, I’m not going to stop. I don’t care why I was brought into existence or what they thought they could accomplish by doing so, but this world is either going to have to kill me or bend to my will.”

Hu Qing let out a chuckle and nodded in amusement.

“That’s the spirit,” he said supportively.

“I know you’re going to have a lot of new bullshit to deal with, but I’m here to back you up,,” Kayla said, slapping a hand on Hu Qing’s shoulder with a bit more force than she meant to.

“That’s what I’m counting on. I wouldn’t have bothered becoming a Lord if I didn’t think that was the case,” Hu Qing replied, patting the back of her hand. “You should probably get some sleep, you’ll be feeling that wine in the morning.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me,” Kayla groaned. “You could use some rest as well, there will be a bunch of paperwork and procedures for you to deal with tomorrow. Housekeeper Li will help you through it, and the Liang clan will have to send someone to assist you as well, but it’s still going to be a huge pain.”

“I’m actually going to be kicking my brother out of his study, I’d say that’s a fun time,” Hu Qing said cheerfully before bidding her goodnight.

Kayla tiredly gave him a thumbs up, switching into a wave as Hu Qing left, taking the door for once. She got up from the couch to move onto the bed while she was still able to walk in a semi-straight line.

I’m gonna regret this tomorrow morning, Kayla lamented. She flopped down, feeling strangely hollowed out now that the matter was done with. The moment of introspection didn't last long as the communication device buzzed inside her robes. Kayla pulled it out, frowning at it in consternation. She shuffled into a sitting position, her tipsiness fleeing as she read the message.

It was from Xianchun, the words short and to the point.

“I accept the new Lord Liang. Meet me in the Western Garden of the Outer Palace tomorrow evening. We need to talk.”

“Damn,” Kayla muttered in surprise. She set the communication device down, blanking on a response for the larger part of a minute before sending a polite message of acceptance.

“There’s no way he would accept this without a fight,” Kayla said to herself quizzically, still staring at the communication device. After a moment of confusion, the answer dawned upon her.

“So Liu Boyue’s back in favor after all. Damn.”

Kayla sighed and curled up on the bed, her good mood gone for the night.

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Cultural Notes

草民/Man of the grass: Though this term literally translates into "grass commoner", it essentially means to come from a grassroots background, i.e. to be a commoner without noble lineage.

万岁万岁万万岁/Ten thousand years: The phrase "May the Emperor live for ten thousand years, ten thousand years, tens of thousands of years" is popularly associated with the default greeting for Emperors thanks to its prolific usage in period dramas, but this in fact varied by time period. Popular legend associates it with Wu Zetian, attributing its origins to an official who wished to praise her.

千岁千岁千千岁/Thousand years: The corresponding phrase for Empresses and the Empress Dowager is to said "May the {Empress/Empress Dowager} live for thousand years, thousand years, thousands of years". Since the Emperor is the highest entity, it then follows that others would have a lower count even when given such honors.

为人正直/Character is honorable and just: An Ancient Chinese proverb meaning that someone is righteous.

无耻小人/Shameless small-minded men: An Ancient Chinese proverb used in a derogatory fashion towards petty people who engage in tasteless schemes and have no moral boundaries.

左右为难/Difficult to go either right or left: An Ancient Chinese proverb that is the equivalent of "caught between a rock and a hard place."