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Chapter 21: Quid Pro Quo

The darkness that swallowed Lukas kept him for a long time. There was nothing but silence where he drifted, nothing but endless night. He wasn’t cold. He wasn’t warm. He wasn’t anything. No thought, no dreams…nothing. It was too good to last, as he slowly awoke.

The pain of the burns came first. He felt the scars on his left arm and elbow, and the feel of fresh, frail tissue forming over them. The injuries were mostly healed, but they throbbed with a dull persistence that robbed him of peace. All the other assorted scrapes and bruises and cuts came back to him as well. Lukas felt like a collection of complaints and malfunctions. He ached everywhere.

His memory came next. The fight. The kasha. Quonnan. Kinetomancy. Burning her alive. Being possessed. Solana ordering for his capture. The FIRE—

Lukas sat up with a start.

Groaning, he rubbed his coarse, gummy eyes. Something told him he was supposed to feel pain while he moved his arms and legs, but the sensation was oddly absent.

At least his chest didn’t feel like it was being sat on by a small elephant. It still hurt to breathe, but he was getting used to it. His body was just as naked as he remembered, but at least these parasites had given him a bed this time, which was far better than their prior attempt at hospitality.

Taking a deep breath, he glanced around at the room. It boasted spartan features, with a bed crafted out of pure rock and several layers of thick monster hide on top. There was an earthen jug with water splattered around it, and a door to his south. The walls were stone, with bioluminescent moss growing on them acting as a natural light source.

“Where am I?”

“Your abductors placed you in this room to rest,” Inanna said.

“Without any restraints?”

“Obviously,” the goddess drawled. “Though…I cannot sense anyone close. It is possible this room is just warded against detection.”

“Do you think…” He trailed off, pushing his legs off of the bed. “Maybe I could—”

“Escape? Why bother? Staying costs you nothing, and may fetch us relevant information about this world.”

“Don’t you ever sleep?” he mumbled.

“Sleep is for the weak, and mortals that have a tendency to exhaust themselves needlessly.”

Lukas mockingly flinched back and touched his chest. “So caustic. What’s gotten into you?”

“Merely bewildered at your luck. It is honestly…surprising. One would almost call it a minor miracle.”

“What are you talking about?”

Inanna’s voice turned darker. “Do you not remember what you did?”

“I…I used fire, didn’t I?”

“A crude way of presenting it, but you are an ignorant mortal so it is to be expected.”

Lukas rolled his eyes. “I remember. When the kasha used it. I think it was—”

Soulscape.

SOULSCAPE

NAME

Lukas Aguilar

Type

Base Host

Level

4

Experience

417

Current Threshold

640

Utilized Soul Capacity

1629/2379

ESSENCE

Maximum Lifeforce Output

725

Replenishment Rate

180 / hour

LEY LINE NETWORK

Maximum Mana Output

400

Synthesis Rate

80 / hour

SKILL ATTRIBUTES

SKILL

LEVEL

CONSUMED SOUL CAP

Raw Lifeforce Manipulation

1

50

Momentum Manipulation

1

50

Friction Modulation

1

50

Pressure Modulation

1

50

Kinetomancy (FRAGMENTED)

APEX

1279

Fire Creation

1

50

Fire Manipulation

1

50

Temperature Modulation

1

50

OMPHALOS ATTRIBUTES

Energy Reservoir Capacity

Current Energy Level

722,428,138 units

OMPHALOS FUNCTIONS

Scan

Level 2

Analyze

Level 2

Prophylaxis

Level 2

Soul Siphon

NA

Alpha Condition

Level 1

Evocation

Level 1

Still no rise in Experience. It seemed souls absorbed via Soul Siphon did not add to his Experience. Lukas didn’t know what to think about that. However, he could easily spot the newest additions to the schema. The first was, of course, the Ley Line Network’s activation, with appropriate attributes related to mana synthesis and its capacity. The other was the latest omphalos function sitting snugly at the bottom of it.

FUNCTION

LEVEL

ENERGY COST

Evocation

1

Variable

DESCRIPTION

Allows BASE HOST access to Ley Line Network for Mana Synthesis and Manipulation. Mana Synthesis to be done from Anomalous Energy Reserves.

Lukas briefly recalled something about an omphalos function popping up when Quonnan had taken over and tried to exert her dominance over his body by creating fireballs in either hand.

If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

In hindsight, that was what had led to her being consumed in the first place.

“Something to keep in mind,” Inanna advised. “It was not you that kept her from taking over. It was her own ego that did it.”

And wasn’t that a humbling thought? The idea had been to use the Alpha Condition function to assert his own dominance, but Lukas had been too weak to even be in any position to exert it. The very moment Quonnan had dived into him, she had wrested control over his body. The only reason he was back in control and she was trapped away as a monster prototype was because she wasn’t a good match for the body.

But if she had been?

A cold pit began to form inside his stomach. He had been lucky this time. But his luck was destined to run out sooner or later. Yes, the reiki had been a weakling, and it had activated the Soul Siphon function, which was also probably why the omphalos system had been so quick to employ it. Imagine if Quonnan had been the first to do this…

Would he—would there even be a “he” left?

Lukas Aguilar would be gone. Deleted. Vanished. With something else in command. An alien entity that saw the world through his eyes.

All because he had been too weak.

Too insignificant.

Too—

“You can always strike a bargain,” Inanna offered.

“Lead me not into temptation,” Lukas sighed. “I’m already facing a property dispute over my own body with my planet’s omphalos. Trying to one-up that by selling my soul away to become your hatchetman gets me further into this mess, not out of it.”

“But you would have nothing to fear. Under my tutelage and blessing, your power shall be great.”

“Yes, yes, I’d have power too great and terrible. And you’d have a greater, more terrible hold over me.”

“Your derision will not unmake the truth. Already you have faced the beings that reside in this world, and already you have suffered their whims. Tell me, mortal, are your morals worth your suffering?”

Lukas sighed again. “You know…just the night before the earthquake, Emma promised to treat me out at a bar. I had been worrying about my exams that were round the corner.” He let out a mirthless chuckle. “Worrying? Hah! More like scared. Trying to balance my editing job while studying for my exams. And then this happened.”

He balled his hands into fists. “I lost everything. My life, dreams, career…friends. I literally have nothing left. My life is gone. My world is gone. Instead, I am in a hellhole with monsters out to eat me. These parasites want to possess me one moment and laud me the next. I don’t know if my body will be my own by the week’s end.”

He let out a harsh breath. “You ask if my morals are worth my suffering. No. They aren’t. I’m not some idealist who’d die to uphold his views. Hell, even I know that it's barely an excuse that keeps getting thinner with every passing day. Maybe it’s just my way of trying to distract myself. To let myself think that the same rules apply. But that's all that I have left. When I use lifeforce, I become a predator. When I unleashed all that fire, I wanted to destroy everything. These…morals are probably what remains of the true Lukas Aguilar. I accept your offer, and I lose them. I’m…just not sure if I’ll survive that.”

Inanna was silent for a few moments.

“Your fears are not unfounded, mortal. The world is not black and white. Parasite or not, you have already absorbed three of them. By the time you are done with this place, countless more will die by your hands.”

Lukas grimaced. “I did that to protect myself. If I start to give in, what difference would there be between me and them?”

“One would be alive, and the other dead.”

“Then let’s hope my luck doesn’t run out any time soon, and that I can train myself to be strong enough.”

“…Fascinating.”

Lukas could feel her smile at him. It wasn’t just a smile. He could literally feel it. Like watching the first rays of the morning sun caress his cheek, Inanna’s emotions coursed through his body. It made him want to walk and run and laugh around without a care for anything in the world.

“Tell me, would you like to know what your bargain entails? About the object, I wish for you to find?”

And just like that, the happiness drained out of him, replaced with an acute wariness. Nothing good ever came out of Inanna's offering to provide him with information without a price. There was always a catch. Especially when she mentioned anything related to the nature of the task.

Still, as they say, curiosity killed the cat.

“…Yes. I would.”

And the world changed.

“She’ll pay.”

The realm itself was trauma incarnate. Sins and desires, the ugly basal instincts that tainted the hearts of men, were the very texture of its environment. Those that hid in the darkness lay in wait, ready to jump and kill and feast upon anything that was even remotely alive. To be in such a place was to be in a lucid dream, one fraught with drunkenness and acute despair.

Upon one of the large, monolithic walls that adorned this realm was a corpse.

The form of a woman.

Naked.

Defiled.

Hacked open.

Insects and worms of the most heinous sort formed hives inside her organs. Pests feasted upon her flesh as parasites fed on the marrow in her bones and lapped up the blood that flowed through her veins. The corpse had already lost track of how long it had been hanging there. For no matter how much time had passed, her body remained eternally fresh, just as it was when it was hung there. Blood would continue to drip from the carcass onto the floor as the body healed itself with extraordinary lifeforce.

The power of a goddess kept her alive.

The power of a goddess prolonged her suffering.

The power of a goddess kept her sane as her mind and soul were constantly violated.

Such was her misfortune.

Such was her curse.

And yet…

“She’ll pay.”

Her spirit remained unbroken.

“She’ll pay.”

That single thought kept her from giving up, from giving in to the torture. Because deep inside, she knew that the realm would not hold her forever. She would break out, and when she did…

Inanna would have her vengeance.

And it would be glorious.

Lukas’s eyes snapped open.

Cold sweat soaked his entire naked form. His body quivered as he felt hundreds of tiny insects gnawing into his stomach, feeding upon his innards, laying their eggs. It was almost like someone had pushed him in front of a speeding train, only to pull him back when he felt the cold metal of its coach on the tip of his nose.

The unspeakable pain and horror of constantly being eaten alive while trapped inside that purgatory were—

Lukas couldn’t help it. He threw up.

“Weak,” Inanna scoffed.

“What—what the fuck was that?” he asked, his throat burning as he felt another hot feeling rise up in his chest. He’d thought he’d faced suffering before, but that was a daydream compared to this. To be robbed of one’s identity and stuck in a body more dead than alive, bearing the eternal agony of having all those little worms and insects nibbling on his—

Lukas clenched his eyes shut.

“A speck of my past. My present. And until you fulfill your part of the bargain, my future. It is my last true memory as the Supreme Queen of An and Ki. Therein Ereshkigal’s domain, trapped within the Seven Gates, is my true form. My authorities buried, my powers trapped within my form, my divinity acting as a curse that keeps my body alive. Suffering in eternal torment.”

“But…why?”

“My sister Ereshkigal, Empress of the Dead, betrayed me. What you felt is the outcome.”

Lukas frowned. “I don’t get it. If that’s your last true memory, and you call it your present and future, then who are you?”

“A reflection. Starlight that left its origin aeons ago. A speck of myself, sheltered in a relic of my own making. A shrine in a distant realm that was cut off to become a lostbelt. One who would find her way back to my true form.”

“You’re a copy,” he concluded.

“I am as much a copy of the true Inanna as you are of the Lukas Aguilar that lived on Earth. Just as you wish to find a way back home, I too desire to be one with my true self. To rise once again and sentence the vermin who betrayed me to eternal torment. You, my dear mortal, will ensure that vengeance is mine in the end.”

Lukas swallowed. “I…”

“This is what I wish for you to recover, mortal. My true form. You will trespass into Irkalla, the realm of the dead, and shatter the Gates that keep me from my freedom.”

“It sounds like a suicide mission.”

“As you are now, dying will be the least of your worries.”

Lukas wholeheartedly agreed. What Inanna was asking him to do was hilariously stupid. A bad joke. Sure, he’d been able to survive some monsters. Sure, he had unlocked some cool abilities. But a goddess? Lukas had seen what Inanna could do with a casual demonstration of the weakest of her skills. She may as well have asked him to outfight her at the peak of her power and survive.

“An apt comparison,” the goddess replied, answering his thoughts. “In all this time, her power will have grown greatly. But I am not asking you to fight.” Her tone grew sharper. “I am asking you to steal. And I shall aid you every step of the way.”

“And let me guess,” Lukas sighed. “Agreeing to your offer is part of the process?”

“Certainly. You cannot acquire the blessings of a goddess without worshiping her any more than you can feel sunlight on your skin without standing in the sun.”

“You can if you’re using something to reflect it toward you.”

“How very apt,” the goddess replied, amused, “for I am a reflection of my true form in many ways.”

He didn’t have a response to that. But there was one question still buzzing around his head.

“Why show me this? Why now? You’d have been better off keeping me in the dark about it. It’s impossible. Absolutely, hilariously impossible. It’d be way easier to get me to agree to a bargain if I hadn’t seen this.”

“Inanna is many things. But a woman of bad faith she is not. You do not wish to accept my offer, and I can assure you that you cannot accomplish the task otherwise. I showed you what awaits you at the end so you may make an informed decision about it.”

“And it didn’t occur to you that I could just renege on my word?”

“Would you?” she asked. “I would not stop you if you did.”

Silence fell.

“Why not?” Lukas asked quietly.

“You need my blessings to reach the zenith I’ve seen for you, and faith cannot be forced.”

“…this is why you keep offering me bargains, don’t you? To ensure that I bind myself into following you.”

“Indeed,” said the goddess. “I will not force your faith, but your independence is another thing entirely. However, I have since realized that it will work with you. And as such—”

“As such you’re—you’re—”

“Yes,” she said simply, and suddenly Lukas was overcome with the sensation of a trap closing around him. “I have no need for an unwilling vessel. The task I want you to complete is already a fool’s errand. If I do not have your loyalty or your devotion to this task, I will be setting myself up for abysmal failure. I would rather use a far superior tactic.”

“Which is…”

“The truth,” Inanna said. “I have shown you what I asked you to acquire for me. I have also told you of the tools you would have to assist you on your quest. But I do not wish for you to tread this path out of coercion.” She paused for a second. “If, and I do mean if, you accept this quest, you will do it because you wish to honor the agreement.”

“Not out of coercion.”

“No. No more tricks. No more deception. This simply is.”

Lukas stared at the floor blankly. Just closing his eyes was enough to send him back to that image of Inanna—hanging on the wall, with maggots feasting on her flesh while her body shook in endless torment. He remembered running from the khorkhoi, making a deal with the goddess, and trying to get the best deal out of her. He remembered how he had been inches from losing himself forever because he had been simply too weak to stop the yurei from claiming him.

Inanna had been the one to help him then.

“To fulfill what you’ve once promised, but chosen to forget.”

That was what she had said. She could have bartered something new in return, but she hadn’t. She could twist things in her favor and play him like a fiddle if she wanted. But she hadn’t. Instead, she had chosen to honor their agreement.

And now…

And now—

She was doing it again. It was like she had once told him—

“You remain insouciant despite knowing what I am. You wear your independence with pride knowing that genuflecting in my presence can make your life easier. And now, you choose to bargain with me, after all that we have spoken of, merely to deepen your understanding of yourself?”

And just like that, Lukas understood. He knew what Inanna was doing. Why she had done what she had done just now.

Inanna had shown him her true situation to make perfectly clear what choice he was about to make. Certainly, it might influence his decision, but when a stark-naked truth stares you in the face…shouldn’t it?

He had never known that it was possible to manipulate someone with candor and truth until now.

She was right. Every time he rejected a deal, it told her a little about him. Every single time he made a choice, it shed light on the core tenets of his personality. Inanna had spent her days observing the deepest nature of her Host—him, and only after she had been confident about it all had she come up with this…

This…

What did one even call this?

His fists clenched. There was always a chance of him dying at the hands of some monster inside this anomaly. There was always the chance of the omphalos finding a better alternative for a Base Host than himself. He could grow and learn and maybe even make himself capable enough to survive, but what did that mean in a world where he didn’t even belong to?

Especially when he’d be spending his days and nights with a pendant hanging around his neck and a goddess in his head. When every single second of her presence would remind him that he had made a bargain and he had ditched it out of fear. Somehow, the moral high ground for not accepting her offer suddenly didn’t feel so high anymore.

And just like that, Inanna had him.

For all her claims to the contrary, Lukas didn’t believe for a second that she was truly willing to let him go. Inanna wasn’t the sort of person who’d take a no for an answer. All her talk about not putting him under coercion was simply that—talk. In her mind, it was less about giving him a choice or showing him the truth, and more about saying the things she thought he needed to hear to make him do what she wanted.

That was how people manipulated other people, by telling them what they wanted to hear instead of what they needed.

“I…” he replied, his tone slow and controlled. “I want you to know that I utterly, utterly, despise you for doing this to me.”

A throaty laugh escaped her. It made him hate her even more. But the decision had been made. The die had been cast. He knew it. Inanna knew it. And she knew that he knew it.

“But I won’t give away my independence. My will is still my own. I may have yielded to your task, but only because of my morals and my humanity. I don’t see a reason to lose that now. If I did, I wouldn’t be what you need.”

“What are you trying to say?”

He felt a tinge of pleasure at the annoyance in her tone. “I meant it. I’ll help you in your quest. Not out of coercion, but because my own ideals, my own sense of right and wrong bids me to do so. You want me to grow stronger. You want me to trespass into places that should not be entered and shatter things that probably can’t be shattered. I’ll do those things, but I’ll do it my way. If I want your help, I will ask for it. You will not try to force it upon me.”

“You dare command me, mortal?”

“No. I’m just telling you what I’m gonna do. I’m willing to honor our agreement. But I’ll do it in my own way.”

“You expect me to have faith in a mortal not to break his word.”

Lukas smiled. It was genuine. “I suppose I do.”

“Trust breeds betrayal. I have seen it as a child. I have seen it in Ereshkigal. Your words will not shake me.”

“Probably not,” Lukas replied, still smiling. “But that’s all I have to offer. Do we have an accord?”

The silence that followed his proclamation was too beautiful to ignore.