...no.

No no no no no.

Caaaaalm down, Brigitte. Calm down.

You know better than to be taking what she said at face value... this isn't the first time you've been through this. Or even the second.

When rescued from a shitty situation, a person's gratitude is more often than not directly proportional to the shittiness of the situation they were saved from. And this gratitude is generally displayed by offering whatever it is that they find most valuable.

Save the life of a merchant who values money over all things? They might offer unspeakable riches.

Save the life of a princess who's been raised to be used as a pawn in a political marriage? She might end up offering her hand in marriage.

And since Yahanaseara obviously treasured her family more than anything else, the best way she can think of to thank the one who saved her is to give them a family of their own.

To give me a family.

But again, I've been through this before.

Which is why I'm fully aware of how overwhelming gratitude is easily mistakable as that, even by the person experiencing said emotion.

Especially by the person experiencing said emotion.

And that's why I'm not going to give in to my urge to jump out the fucking window right now because I know in my logical mind that she isn't actually trying to proposition me or propose to me or any of that it's just that as the one who saved her from slowly starving to death in torturous solitude she's latched onto me and is desperate to repay me for saving her life so yeah even though she's somehow mastered the art of making me feel more uncomfortable than I've ever been in my entire life that's just because I'm an antisocial friendless loner who left all my social skills behind in the womb for my sisters to pick up later

........

Deep breaths, Brigitte.

Deeeep breaths.

Almost lost it there.

Right now, it's time to take all that awkwardness and embarrassment and that weird unfamiliar feeling that I don't know how to describe and shove them all in the back of my mind where they belong.

Because there are Things to Do.

"Brigitte?"

"Uhhhhhhh..."

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO FUCKING DO

"Did I offend you in some way?"

"N- no, sorry-"

I'm trying to put the words together in my head, but everything just turns into illegible baby scribbles.

"I'm just, uh-"

Why am I like this.

Front foot, heel.

Back foot, toes.

180-degree pivot.

"...okay."

Great.

Now that I'm not looking at her, I can actually think straight.

"Yahanaseara."

I look up at the ceiling.

"I don't help people with the expectation of getting anything in return."

Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.

Not counting Guild stuff of course, but that's basically my job.

"I get that you feel grateful to me and all that, but I still don't want you thinking that you need to do anything to pay me back."

"...but I do."

A soft voice, barely above a whisper.

"There is no way I can possibly repay you in full for what you have done for me, but my pride demands that I at least try. That I at least give you something."

A single footstep.

"It is currently impossible since you are a woman, but if you become the same as I am-"

"Fine," I sigh. "I guess I'd be willing to at least give your idea a shot."

"You will!?" An excited voice chirps from behind me.

Way too excited.

"But only if you're sure it won't be too much of a drain on you," I add.

"The energy expenditure on my part is negligible," she replies, "so you will have nothing to worry about."

Is... is she giggling?

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh

"Aaand in the event that this actually works the way you think it will," my stupid voice cracks, "we'll be more than even."

"Eh?"

Trepidation.

"But what about-"

"'Being free of the limits of human mortality' is way more valuable than you think it is," I interject.

That's it, me. Just brush the topic aside for Future Brigitte to deal with later.

"So how exactly are we gonna be doing this?"

"Er... yes..."

A heavy sigh resounds from behind me.

"...just take off your upper clothing and take a seat wherever you find to be most comfortable," Yahanaseara says. "I will handle it from there."

"Gotcha."

Crisis averted.

If not for the fact that now I have to strip down in front of her, I'd actually feel relieved!

though now that I think about it this won't even be my first time doing that and it's actually less bad than yesterday since its only my top instead of everything

"Hahaha..."

Fuck it, let's just get this over with.

Upper robe, off.

Shirt, off.

Br-

"Ah, that is enough."

Oh thank God, I was two seconds away from unhooking it.

Holding onto that tiny sliver of relief for dear life, I make my way over to the bed and take a seat on its edge. And almost immediately, I can feel the depression in the mattress and hear the creaking of the springs as a certain lightning girl crawls atop it from the side opposite where I'm sitting and slowly approaches me from behind.

"!!!"

tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap

In rapid succession, ten tiny fingertips press against the bottom of my ribcage and then slide on up my back.

and underneath the strap

"...hm."

I can feel her breath against my neck and it makes me want to jump out of my body but instead I'm frozen in place

"What exactly is this?" Yahanaseara asks.

"What is what?" I croak back.

"This thing."

tug

Suddenly I feel a bit more pressure up front.

"Y- you mean my bra?"

I want to die.

"Ah, so that is what it is called. What is it for?"

"Modesty? And, uh... support?"

Not that I need much of the latter.

"Hm."

A small pause.

"It is pretty."

"...thanks?"

Just as I'm starting to wish for the sweet release of death to deliver me from this unbearable embarrassment, her hands start shifting around again until both palms are firmly pressed against my back, equidistant from my spine.

"This may feel somewhat uncomfortable, but please bear with it."

"Mm," I nod in acknowledgement.

There's a weird tingling sensation emanating from the pair of tiny hands pressing against my back.

Starting at those two contact points, warmth is spreading throughout my abdomen.

It feels kind of like standing over a hot stove while cooking, or walking into the bathroom right after someone else took a hot shower... as if every breath I take is warming my chest from the inside out.

From my chest

to my head

through my arms and legs

all the way to my fingers and toes

And then, right as that warmth fills every last inch of the container known as Brigitte, it's suddenly joined by a sense of pressure. Soft and snug, like a hug from my mother... but in reverse?

It actually feels kind of nice...

...up until it doesn't.

"Nngh..."

"Just a little more," a soft voice murmurs from behind me. "Your medium is now filled to its current limit, and now I am pushing past that."

I can't even bring myself to force out a response though, this sense of Wrongness is just that overpowering. It's like my lungs are being forcibly overfilled with air so I reflexively exhale but that's not actually what's happening so all I succeed in doing is making myself need to gasp for more air that just ends up making the pressure feel even worse

"I am almost finished..."

slide

"...there."

The removal of Yahanaseara's warm hands causes the comparatively chilly room-temperature air to prickle my back.

And while that warmth is now nowhere to be found, the pressure still remains.

"Ugh, it feels like I took too deep a breath and now I can't exhale it..."

I lean forward and take a couple of deep breaths, but it doesn't help at all.

"Brigitte?"

"Bwuh?"

I look up, and find a certain lightning girl who I naively allowed to play around with my soul now standing in front of me.

"Are you feeling faint?"

"No," I shake my head. "Just... really weird."

"Hm."

Yahanaseara extends a hand, which I graciously accept.

"I understand that it may feel painful at first," she says while helping me to my feet, "but it should get easier with time."

It's a good thing I'm too mentally spent to entertain any innuendos, because that statement could easily be taken the wrong way.

"Also, you should probably refrain from using any magic until your soul fully 'digests' what I just gave it."

"Uh... how long is that gonna take?"

Because magic is kind of my entire thing.

"Taking into account that this was your first time, as well as the conversion from my Lightning to your Water-affinity... no more than an hour?"

"...I guess that's acceptable," I mumble.

I really hope that doesn't mean that I'll also be stuck putting up with this feeling for an entire freaking hour, though.