The girls returned to the dorm almost a full hour later, hair in towels, skin raw from scrubbing but smooth and glowing. It almost felt like they’d lost a whole pound of Semester Stress, and it was beautiful. Kelsey and Hannah helped her physically de-stress, and PumpkinKing messaged her a series of sort-of flirty jokes when he ran out of videos and gifs. Best of all, neither of them actually asked about who she kept talking to during their girl’s day. But based on Hannah’s expression, they’d probably gossip about it later.
Kelsey and Hannah looked a million times better, hangovers long gone. The three of them ate some pre-sliced pizza from the convenience store and watched YouTube videos on meditation, and eventually, they all fall asleep for a quick nap in the middle of their sets of pillows and blankets on the floor.
When Cat woke up, Kelsey’s legs were draped over her, and Hannah was holding her arm like a fluffy teddy bear. She glanced to her phone in her other hand, mid-response to Pumpkin’s latest joke. Her deep breath woke the other girls up; their joints popped as they stretched.
“Man, this was everything I needed,” Kelsey sounded. Her hair was a little kinked from the way she slept against a pillow and a crate that was under Hannah’s bed. “I feel amazing.”
“Right?” Hannah sounded, her eyes still closed. “Man, Cat, you really want to go to a party after all this detoxing?” Cat laughed at her.
“I’m not drinking that much tonight. I just feel like I need to...reset.” She sat up from their pile of fluff to press the auto-play to stop on Hannah’s laptop.
Kelsey laughed. “Only you would find a party a reset.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” She wasn’t offended, but genuinely curious. Was that not how things worked for everyone else? Sure, face masks and freshly-painted nails were fun, but a party was where actual fun was--
“I mean you bust your ass at work, at the library, and at your desk. Of course the only place you can actually ‘reset’ is somewhere you’ve never been.” Hm. That was an interesting thought. Cat hadn’t really considered it that way. For a moment, she thought of what Cam said to her in the beginning of the year, how she never really got a break. She shrugged. If she stopped now, she might not ever get going again. Her mother often said that if you let one part of your life fail, the rest would come tumbling down.
“Well, it will be a good way to end the semester, really,” Cat said. “After that, I’ll do some light studying--there isn’t much I can do right now. And I’ll pack. I think I’m leaving Thursday morning, I think.”
“I’m going to really miss you guys during the break.” Hannah whined. “Are you sure you don’t work at all during the break?” She looked to Cat with puppy-dog eyes.
“I’m sure,” she said, smiling. “I was sure to put in my request right after I found out that Jeffrey was a world traveler. And, I mean, my parents kind of guilted me into it.” They didn’t have to try that hard, though.
“Take lots of pictures. I feel like I know your mom even though I’ve only ever eaten her tamales,” Hannah said through a laugh.
“They’re going to bombard me with questions about you guys.” Cat slowly rose from the floor, a little sore, and twisted around to the alarm clock to check the time. “Alright, I’m going to get ready.”
“So soon?”
“Yeah, I’m going to take my time,” Cat said, nodding. She didn’t need an hour to get ready. Well--she might need a good chunk of that time to fix her hair, which got incredibly knotted and twisted around while she fell asleep on the floor of all places.
“I thought you weren’t into Nate?” her roomie asked as she made her way to the closet.
“I’m not doing any of this for Nate.” She leaned on her desk to stare into her closet. What in the world to wear, when it was freezing outside, but she’d be inside for most of the night, probably warm from a couple beers, but freezing on the walk back to her place? Tights would probably help....
“Oh my God.” Kelsey started laughing, as if she realized something. “Are you giving yourself an evaluation?” Hannah and Cat stared at her, fully confused. “I mean like how you work so hard on presentations and stuff. You put the same effort into it. You’re going to, like, take this time to kind of grade yourself on this semester.”
“That’s stupid,” Cat said without considering it. But damn if it didn’t sound like a satisfying way to put an end to her first college semester.
“Does it not look like that?” she asked Hannah.
“It does, actually” said Cat’s roommate. “I didn’t even think of it that way. I mean, we did just peel off like the first sixty layers of skin, we completely refreshed, and you’re going to a party you don’t even sound like you want to go to so you can ’reset.’” Well. Maybe Cat was using this party as an excuse to evaluate something, but she wasn’t entirely certain if it was as large as the whole semester, so much as just trying to figure out what she felt toward Peter...and maybe what he felt toward her.
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“It just feels like a good way to end the year,” Cat said, shrugging. “It’s the last party I’ll be able to go to where my family won’t be there.”
“Oh, yeah,” Kelsey said, shrugging. “Well, it’s very symbolic.” Maybe it was. This whole confusion started with a party, and it was ending with a party, right? Cat shrugged. She wasn’t even certain if anything was going to change at all. Why would it, just because she now knew about something that happened five months ago?
Cat eventually pulled out a simple, black dress she hadn’t worn that often. She maybe did for one of her presentations, or for a group meeting, or something, but it wasn’t very casual, so she didn’t tend to wear it that much. But as she held it, she frowned.
“That dress sends mixed signals,” Hannah said immediately. “That looks like you’re dressing up for someone.”
“That someone can’t be me?” Cat asked. But Hannah was right, and she placed it back on the hanger. She wasn’t dressing up for anyone. She wasn’t going to wear anything especially flashy to get any extra attention--that would...taint her data or something. She needed to look as average as possible.
“I don’t think Nate would get a clear message from that.” Hannah was right. “Just wear jeans or something.” Easy for her to say. Cat only had one pair of jeans.
“I don’t even normally wear jeans.” Cat bent to her dresser to pull out her only pair.
“But a dress is like....” Kelsey shrugged. “I don’t know. You look too cute. If you want to tone it down, look less cute.” Cat laughed at her.
“Usually Hannah’s the one flirting with me when I get dressed,” she said lightheartedly. The girls shared a hearty laugh, but eventually they settled Cat into jeans, a red sweater of Hannah’s, and her usual boots.
“Red is so your color,” Kelsey said. She sat on Cat’s bed, her legs swinging back and forth. “What are you doing for makeup?”
“Hardly any, I think,” Cat said. Though going the extra mile would give her a boost of confidence, she had to be practical. “Fill in my brows, some concealer...mascara. I think that’s all.”
“Yeah, don’t want to clog all your pores after all those face masks,” Hannah agreed. “You can use one of my makeup wipes when you get back tonight if you’re worried about it. Then you don’t have to go all the way to the bathroom to wash your face.”
“Thanks.” Cat began to brush out her hair to start her side-braid, and her friends started to pick up their mini-fort off of the floor and throw away any extra wrappers from snacks.
“You actually look really cute,” Hannah started to say when Cat was finished. “I mean, you look comfy, you look rested, your skin looks like you’re pregnant--”
"What?” Kelsey and Cat exploded at the same time.
“In that you’re glowing and fresh, I was going to say!” Hannah continued. “Jesus. Unless you’re worried about that?” Cat shook her head, but frowned.
“Haven’t been with anyone since--well, before Halloween.” Maybe that wasn’t so long ago. “But I’ve had a couple periods since, so I think I’m good.” Periods were her reason for needing concealer at all. Damn menstrual acne.
“The worst relief ever,” Kelsey agreed with a nod. “Alright, you going to get going? I’m gunna head back to my place, maybe grab some ice cream on the way there, and go to bed early.”
“That sounds heavenly,” Hannah said through a sigh. “I might join you later if I can’t sleep.” Cat grabbed her purse and began to empty out any receipts she’d acquired over the period of time since the last party.
“You meeting Cam or going straight there?”
“I’m going straight there. Cam’s got a date.”
“Oh, fancy. Well, you can--” Kelsey started to laugh at her own joke before she even said it. “You can always walk with Peter.” Hannah joined her laughter, but Cat didn’t respond.
“At least you’re wearing red, so no one will see the blood.” More laughter as Cat pulled her black jacket from the closet. “But please don’t get blood on my sweater!”
“No promises,” was Cat’s cheerful response.
----------------------------------------
It was freezing. Kelsey agreed, as they started to walk out together, that it must have been less than thirty degrees outside. Cat shivered violently, but her friend seemed to be more acclimated.
“You’re not a desert girl, are you?”
“I live in a farm town in the north,” Cat confirmed.
“Well, one thing I always like about it here,” Kelsey said as they came across the fork they needed, “is that you can’t predict the weather, so you’ve always got to be prepared! Like, tomorrow it could be sunny. Or it could rain.”
“Most people look at the weather report,” Cat grumbled. Her breath fogged in front of her like she was some sort of steam boat.
“Nah, they’re always wrong anyway. We fucked up the Earth so much, meteorology is a joke to Global Warming.” It sounded like an exaggeration, but Cat agreed with her anyway. “Anyway, text Hannah or me when you get there, just so we know where to send the cops when you get kidnapped!” Kelsey waved at her as she stepped toward her direction, and Cat made a face at her as goodbye when she turned to the sidewalk.
Walking helped warm her up. The campus, though lit up well for security, wasn’t all that populated. She assumed people were studying, or sleeping, or...something. Fraternity Row wasn’t nearly as lively as the last time she’d seen it. The house she was looking for was a couple blocks down, further than she’d ever been on foot. If there weren’t a few groups of random friends shouting loudly and messing about, Cat might have opted to call Hannah just to have someone on the phone while she walked.
But eventually she found the house she looked for, and let her stomach tie into intricate knots. This was possibly the smallest, chillest party she’d ever seen on Frat Row.
Laughter bubbled through the windows of the little house; it was a little run down, in need of fresh paint and a little TLC, but it would be cute enough if they ever got to mowing down the front lawn. Cars hardly fit, parked along the street and even one halfway on the lawn to squeeze in just another parking spot. For whatever reason, this helped Cat decide that she never wanted to live on Fraternity Row. Maybe the dorms were a little congested, but at least she didn’t have to go out of her way to make space for herself. She had her bed, her desk chair...her bathroom locker.... Well, it wasn’t much.
Cat shoved her hands in her jacket pockets and glanced on either side of the street before she skipped across. The pale house had music, but it wasn’t as loud as the other parties Cat heard. The door wasn’t open, and there wasn’t anyone acting as a bouncer to turn away exes or freshman or anyone that wasn’t welcome, so it probably wasn’t very big. Cat braced herself, then knocked on the front door.