Rene honestly hated that she had enough doubt to question this. Lord Dazuz actually made a good point—and she knew Adelinde wouldn’t take it well if she heard what the Dazuz family was working towards. To her, it would mean that more people than just Aurik were willing to sacrifice anything they needed to so they could live somewhere that didn’t even exist yet.
She didn’t know how Adelinde would react to Rene’s side of things, though—if it would hurt her more, or if she’d actually sympathize with her. She had no way to tell.
Ending things off now would, in all honesty, probably be the safest route. The more trust Adelinde put in her, the more damage it will do if she heard. But every time Rene thought of that, she remembered Adelinde’s offer of staying in the palace.
So long as Lord Dazuz didn’t follow her and force her to say anything, Rene could probably manage to never bring up her role as the creation effort’s first omyn—and she could stay close enough to Matteo to keep him from becoming their second, if he grew up to have that kind of power.
Rene still hasn’t made a decision a week later, but she could tell she was nearing one. She knew what she wanted and had a good chance on pulling it off; nothing would stop her from worrying, but she might as well face the fear now.
She came to that conclusion while making sure she looked fine, fully intending to meet with Adelinde while the rain was light and Matteo could be with them. She forgot about everything when she was with them; in a way, they were her distraction.
She turned to leave before someone knocked on her door. The person spoke before she could ask them anything.
“Lord Dazuz would like you to eat breakfast with them, ma’am.”
She didn’t want to, but she couldn’t avoid it for now. He probably just wanted to give her another task.
“I’ll be there in a few minutes—thank you for letting me know.”
They murmured some agreement and were gone by the time Rene opened the door to leave. She gave greetings to whatever staff members gave her some ‘good mornings’ first on her way to the dining hall. When she made it there, she received half-acknowledgment from the Dazuz family.
They waited for her to get settled before they started eating. Her thoughts wandered during the course of the meal—some to her dilemma, some looking forward to heading out, and some worrying that she might have to cancel her plans. The silence didn’t strike her as odd—their meals weren’t much more than a formality.
Lord Dazuz was the first to say anything, albeit after everyone finished eating and Rene prepared to leave.
“I need you for something else today.” There came the request.
“Can I do it tomorrow?” Rene asked, not expecting anything from it but opting to bring it up anyway.
“It doesn’t have to take long,” Lord Dazuz reasoned. “A family friend—an ally of the cause—invited us all to some party or another. I have meetings scattered during the day, so I thought you could bring Elina and Leo there.”
“They’re perfectly capable of taking a train themselves,” Rene pointed out. Neither of her adopted siblings protested nor agreed; Elina looked most interested, but Leo’s look implied a certain amount of unwillingness.
“It will only take you thirty minutes to get there, thirty minutes to get back,” he maintained. “Your date or whatever else you have planned can wait until then.”
The other three perked up at the emphasized word, but none of them openly commented. Rene sighed, standing up and looking at her adopted siblings.
“Come on,” she said. She would only waste time by arguing. “I’m not waiting for you to change.”
“I guess this is good enough,” Elina mused, standing up as well and pushing some of her hair back. Leo stood and walked behind her without much comment, simply following his sister’s lead.
They trailed behind her, surprisingly, instead of walking in front—she went as quickly as she could just to send them off sooner; they weren’t her preferred company, and if given enough time one or the other would make some comment or another. Unfortunately, Elina barely waited until they left the mansion before she spoke up.
“Father mentioned you have a date?”
She tried to ignore her, if only because Elina took enough after her father that she could tell when Rene’s expressions changed. She didn’t know if she would see that Rene doubted being with the Dazuz family—doubted helping them create a new nation—but Elina would be able to notice that Rene doubted whether or not staying with Adelinde was a good idea. Even if Elina didn’t understand the reason, she would much rather keep it to herself.
Elina carried on regardless, shifting into a sharper tone. She wanted to bother Rene, while Leo remained silent and relatively neutral.
“I heard the queen’s been seen with another woman: blonde, a bit taller than her, a little sloppy. She contrasts nicely with the queen’s red hair, neat appearance, looser clothes. That sounds a bit like you, doesn’t it?”
“If I said it was, would you let it go?”
“It depends.” Elina made a few extra steps so she walked ahead of Rene, then looked back over her shoulder. “Father’s told me a lot about what you need to do, how I can help, that sort of thing. I’m supposed to guide you and Leo down the right path moving forward, should anything happen to Father—and I can see now that you’re straying. May I give some advice?”
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“No.”
Elina smiled as if she accepted.
“I assume you wouldn’t like it if I outright told you to leave the queen,” Elina mused, looking ahead of her again. “I’m not sure how Father would take it either. But, despite that, you have a clear advantage: Aurik Qrian came before you. Learn from his mistakes—you’re already doing better than he did, as far as I can tell. You never talk much about fairytales and legends like he did; you haven’t given any clues on our family’s goals.”
The train station came into view, and Leo silently moved so he stood closer to his sister than Rene. Elina briefly gave her brother a kind look before resuming her earlier tone towards Rene.
“You must seem more…realistic, to the queen. I find it a bit amusing; realistically, your basic motivations are the same as his. You just seem a bit more content to let something go than he was.”
They reached the train station, with Elina moving on to one of the steps leading up to the platform. She turned around on the step, looking down at Rene with the extra height. Leo took a spot next to her, albeit lacking any menacing intention. Elina was good at making malice seem friendly through her smile; to anyone else, it would look like normal sibling banter.
“Aurik Qrian tried to play both sides—he wanted to create a nation and have his chosen partner. Am I wrong to guess you’re doing the same?”
Rene stayed silent. She didn’t want both; if she could have Adelinde and know she wouldn’t mess something up along the way, she would gladly take that. She wasn’t particularly keen on giving Elina more ways to drag on the taunting.
She frowned, but continued nonetheless.
“You’ve been going in and out of the house for over a year now, not even doing what Father asks and outright disobeying him at times,” Elina said. “The sooner you make a choice, the better. Listen, Rene—only one side can give you a purpose. You should know which one that is by now.”
Rene had to actually bite on her tongue to keep from responding. Putting it that way, her answer was clear.
There wasn’t a point in making Elina and Leo relay the message back when she would have to get her things from the mansion anyway. She didn’t need to see Elina off with a look of smug satisfaction.
Elina stepped fully onto the platform. “We can get there on our own. Go ahead and meet with your date.” She gestured for her brother to follow, her tone noticeably calmer. “Come on, Leo.”
Leo nodded, never once giving Rene any acknowledgment. Rene left the general area but ultimately didn’t go to the music district as planned. Her thoughts cycled back to the same process as that morning.
She didn’t…really have a reason to stay, did she? Adelinde offered to give her a place to live; even if they broke up or Adelinde found out about the Dazuz’s involvement in the new nation, she wouldn’t have a hard time finding work so she could live on her own.
All Lord Dazuz needed her for was to bind something so another island can be created—and there was no way to force an omyn to do anything involving their powers. If he ever came to her and asked her to carry through with the plan, she could just decline. Thinking on it, he couldn’t even tell Adelinde about Rene’s supposed role in this without outing the Dazuz family as a part of ‘the cause’ as well; she had no doubt that Adelinde would investigate it after recovering from the truth, if Mark didn’t look into it for her.
She let out a little chuckle no one around her could hear. For once, Elina’s condescending attitude actually encouraged her.
…
Rene spent the day with Adelinde, specifically confirming first thing that living at the palace was still on the table; Adelinde said that it could be done whenever Rene wanted, having gotten Mark’s approval earlier. Should all things go well, she could start distancing herself from the creation effort and—hopefully—if her involvement ever came up, she could confidently say she hadn’t done anything for it recently.
She went back to the Dazuz mansion twice; once to gather up and move her stuff, then again to make it official. She gathered up her storybook pictures—the only thing left on her wall, the rest safely placed in a box waiting in an empty room at the palace—and walked to Lord Dazuz’s study. She waited outside the door when she noticed he was still in a meeting, able to hear some pieces of conversation.
“I still don’t see why we don’t already have our own island. This could’ve been done years ago.”
“She didn’t tell me she could bind things until after Qrian died; even then, it wasn’t directly.”
“Why did you take her in if you were never sure?”
“She has first island blood like the rest of us. If nothing else, the new island would need people to populate it; peasants alongside lords, especially.”
Rene almost smiled. He unwittingly made this slightly easier.
The conversation grew a bit more hushed when a few of the staff passed by, then the visitor left with barely a glance towards Rene.
She entered the study without knocking, earning some kind of expression change from Lord Dazuz—not quite surprise, but he didn’t seem to expect her. Rene walked up to his desk, put down the storybook pictures and papers, then stepped back towards the door.
“What are these for?” Lord Dazuz asked somewhat wearily. He’s likely been arguing about one thing or another for most of the day, if not pouring over information that could be helpful to finding a second omyn.
I’m not creating a nation I would have no place in,” Rene said firmly.
“What makes you think you have no place in it?” He looked and sounded like he was trying to argue with a child: blunt and condescending. She wouldn’t be entirely surprised if he expected her to be acting on impulse.
Rene took a little breath, recalling how much the Sólstaðuric man they met in Eyset scowled when he saw her. Her first island heritage didn’t come by necessity after its fall; not many who believed in creating a nation would think she belonged there, as a result. The first island was not ‘her nation,’ like it might be for those who descended from immigrants.
With that in mind, she responded with her own question. “Would they really want someone like me there, even if I helped create it?”
He couldn’t protest; he knew how they were as much as anyone.
Frowning, he said, “So you think you have something better in Dakari?”
“I do. More than I would have anywhere else.”
“And what will you do if you lose it?”
“I won’t come back here—I know that much. I just thought it’d save some trouble down the line if I told you that.”
Rene turned to leave, hearing Lord Dazuz’s final call as she walked away.
“I haven’t known a single person to fully abandon the cause. You’ll be back.”
He’d best be prepared to see her be the first and be disappointed, then.