After spiraling downwards into the city, we come to a stop somewhere in the middle of one of the extended petals. The doors slide open.

We’ve arrived in a large open plaza. The kind that feels like it should be hosting a daily flea market but is instead hosting hundreds of trauma victims. Lining the plaza are stacks and stacks of ornate buildings, from squat Victorian houses to clock towers, all laden with every manner of advertisement: garish signs, projected holograms, striped awnings, balloons, and one honest-to-god waving inflatable tube man.

I hesitate to leave, only because I have no idea what the hell is going on, but there are dozens of those pre-homo sapiens shunting people outside. In case their authoritative ‘don’t mess with me’ stances aren’t enough to tell me their positions, they’re all wearing the same brown wrestling singlets and wielding weapons that looks a lot like police batons.

“All passengers must exit. Come on, out you go.”

Ron rubs his hands together. “We going?”

“Seems that way,” I answer. “Luci?”

With the back of her hand, she nudges hair from her eyes. Her palms are still wet with blood. “Yeah.”

The moment we hit the plaza, we’re met with another wall of text.

New Quest! NEW HORIZONS

You currently have (1) day on your visitor’s visa. Reconstitution commences in (15) hours and (32) minutes. Upon reconstitution, all 5,850,000 Earth regions will become available. Visit a region and complete its requirements to extend your visa. You may NOT visit regions or party with members from Handor or Loxilil until otherwise stated.

Until then, relax! Explore the city and all of what it has to offer. All establishments take vouchers and/or gips as currency, however some may provide quests as an alternative. Please note that the Five Houses District is only open to veteran participants.

Objectives:

- Visit an apparel shop: In Progress

- Visit a weapon shop: In Progress

- Visit an item and accessory shop: In Progress

- Visit an apothecary: In Progress

- Visit a dining facility: In Progress

Rewards: XP

New Quest! LEARNING THE ROPES

We are pleased to invite you to the official Meet & Greet Orientation. Here, we provide participants with information for this iteration of the Global Initiation. This includes orientation items such as “Planet Grievances,” “Your Visa,” and “Class Choice.” This is also a chance to learn from representatives from the Global Initiation team including system chairmen, your planet’s delegates, game designers, and House ambassadors.

Participant (Helen Gables), your orientation is in the Pinelock Center, Showroom 6, and will begin in (70) minutes. If you cannot make this time, you may file for another appointment at an administrator’s office. Rescheduling may not be feasible, so we recommend you do what you can to make your appointment.

See you then!

Objectives:

- Attend the Meet & Greet Orientation: In Progress

Rewards: (1) Voucher

“So this is really happening,” says Luci. “Like, it’s not over.”

“No, no I think we’re in this for the long haul.” I sigh. “Are you… okay?”

She doesn’t answer. I’m not sure she heard me. I think she might be in shock.

When I turn to regard Ron, he’s just standing there slack-jawed. I can’t tell if he’s in awe or just zoned out. Either way, he seems good. I look around until I catch the eye of a security guard.

Marlap - Pharos Security (Lv 50)

Also Level 50. Huh.

“Hey, what are we…”

“Nope. I’m here to get you off the train and make sure you don’t cause trouble,” she snaps. Then she spots Luci and her tone softens. “Though you might want to find yourselves a nice hotel before they get booked up. You’ll want to be rested for your orientations. Check your map. The Hotel Universal is just a short walk toward the center.”

I don’t have a chance to ask follow-ups before she returns her attention to the tram. Clusters of survivors shuffle past us. Nearby, a guy from that boisterous group is squaring up against someone who seems about one idiot away from snapping.

I shrug. “Well, I guess we’ve got our orders.”

A fight breaks out somewhere on the other side of the square, and a line of security guards rush in to intervene.

Luci leans close. “A hotel?”

“Yeah, we’re going to a hotel. Come on.”

Following the map overlay, we weave through the foreign city toward the hotel. According to the map, we’re in the Novice District which seems to be a commercial sector for newbies. There are dozens of shops that look like they’d work for the “New Horizons” quest. Most of them are quaint little storefronts, from 1950s-style barber shops to 18th century bookstores, though now and then they’re punctuated by some cheap, mass-produced stuff. You’ve got your sad strip mall stores with fading signs. You’ve got your boring concrete blocks with square windows and mannequins that scream H&M.

And then there’s the alien-inspired shops. My favorite type is the twisting three-story glass tower. It keeps showing up and it looks severely out of place. I’m not even sure how to enter.

In all, it feels like they had seventeen different city planners take screenshots of our planets and then throw some dice to see who decides what. How’s that saying go again? “A camel is a horse designed by committee.” I always liked that one.

Soon, we reach a perfectly normal four-story terracotta building with illuminated marquee letters stating “The Hotel Universal.”

It feels a little shameful to waltz into a hotel in the state that we’re in. I acknowledge that I began today in a bathrobe at a grocery store and that this entire situation was forced on us against our will, but still. I’m reminded of a time, back in college, when my friends and I went white water rafting in Montana. We splurged on a three-star hotel and returned soaked, dirty, and reeking like a swamp to the horror of the absolutely scandalized staff.

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it.

This is worse.

Swallowing whatever dignity I have left, I lead our party inside. Thankfully, unlike that three-star hotel, this lobby is small and unassuming, complete with a humming coffee vending machine and a dusty magazine rack. In the middle is a front desk, and at the front desk is a receptionist. And that receptionist is a bonobo in a suit.

That’s it. That’s the description I’ve got. It’s a four foot tall, black furred primate in a blazer and tie. He looks very dapper.

Phinny - Manager of The Hotel Universal (Lv 50)

“Hi,” I say.

“Hello!” he says back.

Ron gapes. “You’re a monkey!”

“Great ape,” the bonobo replies cheerfully. He sounds like a 1940s Hollywood actor with that pseudo-British Mid-Atlantic accent they all put on. With one arm, he hoists himself onto the counter. His feet are bare and - like the great ape that he is - shaped very much like hands. One of them is casually rolling a coin across his toes. “How can I help? You can call me… Wait, hold on a split. Yeah, you can call me Phinny. You looking for one room or three?”

“Um. Three?” I glance back at my party members. Ron gives an enthusiastic thumbs up. Luci nods. “We have vouchers. They’re in our inventories. I don’t know how…”

“Perfect! I can handle that.” His eyes flick back and forth as though he has a HUD of his own. Now that I think about it, there’s no computer or register. Weird.

Inventory item removed: (1) Hotel Suite Voucher

Inventory item added: (1) Hotel Key #302

“There you are. Check-out is at noon. If you want to continue your stay, you can use another voucher or pay. It’s 50g a night.”

“Cool.”

“This your first day?” he asks.

“Yeah. Isn’t it… I mean, I don’t know how this works. Isn’t it everyone’s first day?”

“For the Earth fellas, yeah. Loxilil’s been here a couple weeks. Handor a little longer than that. You’re Earth then?”

“Um, yeah. We’re from Earth.” Going to add that to a list of things I never thought I’d have to say.

“Gotcha. Sorry, you all look the same. Having all three of you running around at once is a bit of a mindshag. I hear Handor hit their infestation rate a couple centuries back, but the Volese wanted to wait ‘til another couple planets crossed the line. Their planet was not happy about that one. Whole thing was a nuclear wasteland. Barely any participants.”

“The planet?”

“Oh sheesh, you haven’t been to your orientation yet.” He makes a zipping motion across his lips. “Can’t keep my gossip glutton mouth shut, can I? That’s what husband #4 calls me. Bit of a mouthful. Hey, we’ll talk once you’re caught up though, yeah? Stairs are on the right. Enjoy your stay!”

“Uh-huh.”

I try to think of something else to say, but my brain can no longer form a coherent sentence. Ron looks like he’s about to konk out, and Luci is pale and wide-eyed, like a deer caught in the headlights. I almost don’t want to leave her in a room by herself, though maybe it’s a good idea to give her some time alone to decompress.

We head upstairs and separate into our designated units. The hotel room is perfectly standard. It’s got all the accouterments: a queen-sized bed wrapped tightly in sterile white sheets, too many decorative pillows, abstract wall art. There’s even a corded phone, though it isn’t plugged in. There are no outlets. There’s a globe of light just hovering in the corner. I have no idea how to turn it on or off.

There’s a bathroom, thank god, with a normal sink and an almost-normal toilet. It doesn’t flush. I close the lid and whatever I left in there disappears. Did it… did it teleport? Are they using teleportation for toilets? Surely not.

The shower is equally bizarre. It’s a transparent tube. I step inside, and - I want to say a laser? Maybe? - a laser sort of rolls down over my body and then I’m clean. No more blood. No more monster ichor. It feels nice, but it’s over in five seconds which is far too short for a shower. Honestly, how am I supposed to sit and sob in a shower with lasers in it?

To top off the absolute surrealism of this experience, I dump my tattered leather “armor” into the trash and squish my clothes into something that looks like an opaque microwave labeled “Laundry.” It bings, and my clothes come out not only clean but folded.

I think I hate it. On any other day, I’d love it. It’s bizarre, overly-efficient alien technology. What’s not to love? But after everything I’ve experienced today, I just want one, just one, completely normal thing. Give me something mundane. Something tediously average. Preferably with alcohol.

When I return downstairs, Luci is already waiting. She looks a little rejuvenated, though it could just be the lack of bloodstains. On the way up, Ron mentioned his orientation doesn’t start for another couple of hours, so he’s taking a nap. Luci’s orientation starts ten minutes before mine, though she’s in a different conference room. Same building though, apparently. According to the invite, we need to head to a convention center in the Recreation District, which is on the island to the left of ours.

There are three ways to get there: walking, rail, or boat. The rail is the same as the tram only it’s underground. Phinny says the boat is really just a matter of style. There are canals running through each of the petals, so if you feel like being waterbound, then there you go.

There’s also an unavailable fourth mode of transport, and that’s teleportation. However it’s only an option for higher-level individuals, meaning seasoned participants and people like Phinny.

Luci and I choose the rail. We have to walk to the station, but the rail drops us off right outside the convention center. Inside the city, we can pin a destination on the overlay, and it works a lot like Google Maps - which is fantastic because as a city specifically designed for traumatized people who have no idea where they’re going, this place is convoluted as hell.

The underground station looks like something out of a 1970s sci-fi flick. The ceiling is arched and patterned like a waffle iron. When we settle into a railcar, we each get an alert.

Inventory item removed: 5g

Wallet: 895g

Again, it’s impossible to sense when we’re moving. I pull up the map, and it’s changed to reveal the rail stations. Each stop is named after a district with wonderfully helpful suffixes like “1” and “2.” Judging by our little dot on the map, the underground rail is much slower than the tram. I don’t mind. Everything has been moving too fast as it is.

In lieu of muffled announcements, the upcoming stops pop up in our heads, which I do not appreciate.

Next Station: Novice District 2

I nudge Luci. “Two more stops.”

“Okay,” she says softly. She stares at her lap. She’s digging her fingernails into her arm, leaving a pattern in her skin of little crescent moons.

“Look. Luci.” I take a deep breath. God, this feels awkward. “Your uncle is going to be fine, you know. They have laser showers. They can make him better.”

“I know.”

“Is it… is it your mom and dad? If they’re in a different city, we can look them up tomorrow. And your brother, Liam, right? I think he’ll end up in the children’s center. He can file for a city transfer. I bet you can even see him.”

“Yeah.” She straightens her back and looks up at me, resolute. “It’s okay. Really. You don’t have to worry about me. My mom says I’m a rubber ball. I’m good at bouncing back. You know, when your little brother has leukemia, you get used to taking care of yourself. I just need a breather, and I’ll be back before you know it.”

I pause. “You don’t have to be. You don’t have to be okay if you don’t want to be. This is really fucked up.”

“So’s life, am I right?” She gives me a joyless cheesy grin.

It’s incredibly forced, but I laugh. “Yeah, so it is.”

After a moment, she asks, “Do you have anyone?”

“Oh. Me? Um. No, not really. My dad passed a few years ago. And my mom… We haven’t talked much since. If she even tried to make it to the portal, I’d be shocked.”

“No friends?”

“No. God, no. Not anymore.” Her eyes widen, appalled. Oof, gotta tone that shit down, Helen. “I suppose there are people I hope are doing alright. But no one I need to check up on, if that makes sense. The last few years… Well, it’d be like looking at Instagram and you see someone you know going through some shit, but it’s been so long that it’d be weird to reach out, so instead you’re just sad.”

“Why can’t you message them?”

“You lose touch. You’ll…” I stop. I almost say ‘You’ll get it when you’re older’ which seems a little tone deaf for an apocalypse.

Next Station: Recreation District 1

Luci pouts. “I really wish they’d get out of my head.”