Meanwhile
June 29, 2075
1900 MDT (Mountain Daylight Time)
Near Colorado Springs, Colorado
On the Peak of Mount Olympus
Drew Howard's Point of View
“Please stay away from my ear,” Commander Zhi says in haste.
“Huh?” Rachel asks in her typical confusion.
“Sigh. One day, Annie thought it would be “romantic” if she licked my ear, and uh, it wasn’t, so now I get paranoid about people being near my ear. It’s my only weakness, so please respect my wishes,” Commander Zhi explains as he gazes across the horizon.
“Understood, Commander Zhi,” Rachel politely complies.
That’s our greatest soldier’s weakness?
“Excuse me for a minute,” Commander Zhi says as he walks away and holds his right ear.
This nation’s government had a hidden military base built into this rocky hill that overlooks the city. Genius! It gives a perfect view of the calm blue skies, you can feel the cool breeze of the wind, there’s enough food and water to last several people for months if rationed correctly, and we have a strategic advantage over potential enemies from up here. The perfect hideout. History books are one thing but witnessing Earth’s wonders with my own eyes just feels more authentic.
“So, as a fellow redhead,” Annie says to Ruby. “You ever looked at a man and said, “Ooh yas, I want you in my bed. Beloved, my love for you is myriad, and if you’d like I can make you a dad,” she rhymes with a big smile. “I know that I lack a motherin’ résumé, but it’s a fact that I just want to have twelve babies with you one day!”
“What kind of fucking drugs are you on?” Ruby asks in disbelief.
“The strongest drug known to mankind, of course!” Annie explains with a crazy smile. “It’s the one that makes you blind, and you hope it doesn’t end in a divorce,” she says with a look of disgust on her face. “It can make you feel like a mighty skyscraper, but both require lots of hard work and labor. It even makes you feel like a pathetic loser when things go south, after ya’ll both play the unsympathetic accuser, regrettin’ the words that left ya’ll’s big ol’ mouths,” she says as she plays with the glass jar where her pet spider resides in. “It’s symbolized by a beautiful white dove. Ruby,” she says with an eye roll. “You ain’t that dense, I’m talkin’ ‘bout love.”
“You’re insane,” Ruby says as she rolls her eyes.
“Insanely lovestruck!” Annie exclaims. “Sigh. The one I love doesn’t seem to love me, though,” she says with a pouty look on her face. “I always throw him constant hints and try to make him jealous, so he’ll pay attention to me, but I honestly don’t know how Jian feels about me.”
“Have you ever asked him?” Rachel asks in curiosity.
“I did, but his answer just left me even more bruised and confused. Sigh. One day I finally gained enough courage to ask him, “Jian, where do your romantic interests lie?” “You won’t buh-leave what that fool said!” Annie says in frustration as she throws her arms in the air. “H-he just stared deeply across the horizon with those whimsical eyes of his, and… and said,” she says as she prepares to mimic Jian’s serious face. “… With justice…,” she says in a deep voice. “I mean the sexy way he said it made me want to rip his shirt off, but…” she says in her normal voice. “his response has left me so discombobulated. I didn’t know what to do after that statement, so I licked his ear, but …” she explains as she pouts again. “he didn’t like that, and now he hates me!”
“How long have ya’ll known each other?” Rachel asks.
“I met him after my debut performance!” Annie answers as she chews on her own hair. “He’s not only my bestest-estest friend in the world, but he’s the one who reduces stress and drives me to success. Jian and General Farrington are the best teachers that I could ever ask for, and I’ll fucking kill anyone who thinks otherwise!”
“Nobody thinks that. You need to calm your tits,” Ruby says as she rolls her eyes.
“Calm your tits!” Annie shouts at Ruby as she points at her.
“Um,” Rachel says as she steps in front of the enraged Ruby. “It sounds like Jian might like you, but he seems to be super focused on something, k?”
“I guess.” Annie pouts.
“Your rhymes were spectacular! What made you do that?” Rachel ponders.
“Rachel, patrollin’ is necessary, but can be extremely wearyin’!” Annie explains as she licks a small rock. “I just felt like tryin’ something new while we’re stuck in this brief intermission of our lives, awaitin’ the next chapter. Ooh, I bet there’ll be a lot of action. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to deliver this rock to Jian,” she explains as she playfully skips away.
What? Why would you do that?
“Don’t underestimate those two,” Scarlett warns as she approaches her sister.
“I can take em’,” Ruby boasts. “This kingdom ain’t big enough for more than one redhead anyway.”
“I also exist, Ruby,” Scarlett says as she rolls her eyes. “Anyway, Jian is the strongest soldier for a reason. He has over 12000 confirmed zombie kills along with more than 250 completed missions and expeditions.”
“Ok and? But can he whoop me?” Ruby says in disbelief. “Scoff. I don’t think so. Besides, I heard about those expeditions. One time they went all the way to Canada, and the only thing they came back with was a shit ton of candy from a warehouse. Teresa ended up winning and hoarding most of the candy to further enlarge her head, so woopity-doo for expeditions!”
“Annie is the most unpredictable soldier we have, however, her talents come with a troubled past,” Scarlett says. “Long ago, Olympus entered a war with a group of cannibals after they pillaged several of our settlements. Their leader wielded powerful Halos, making him virtually unapproachable to our troops. Olympus pushed through and managed to corner their army into their headquarters, which was a warehouse that resembled a human cattle/sex trafficking facility. “Red Riding Hood” Annie O’Carroll, her entire family, and village were victims and lived in horrible conditions as they awaited their turn. But by the time Olympus reached the factory, they only saw the dismembered limbs of the enemy and victims alike. They found the leader dead, his Halos nowhere to be found, but they did discover one sole survivor. General Farrington found a little girl with a scythe-shaped Halo, a string necklace with an ear, nose, eyeball, tongue, tooth, and bottom lip attached to it, and a black widow spider on her forehead. This girl was happily eating the leg of the leader and just smiled before offering General Farrington a piece until she tried a sneak attack with her scythe only to collapse from her wounds. She was wearing a red hoodie covered in the blood and guts of everyone in the facility, and it didn’t take long for the soldiers to figure out that she single-handedly slaughtered everyone inside the facility. General Farrington assured her that she was safe now, but her response was, “No. Not until I kill Medusa.” as she hummed herself to sleep. This little girl became to be known as “Red Riding Hood” Annie O’Carroll for the red hoodie she wears in battle.”
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“Zombies to our twelve!” A soldier announces.
“We got this,” Jian says as he and Annie rush into battle to deal with the zombies traversing up the mountain.
“Ruby, who do you think you stand a better shot against?” I ask.
“Well, Drew, Annie gets on my nerves the most, so of course I have to kick her ass first,” Ruby chuckles.
“Don’t forget to take notes, kids!” Annie yells out to us as she takes out a small cylinder-like device from her waist, and presses a button, revealing a fierce-looking scythe. “Yeet!” Annie shouts as she throws the scythe at a zombie.
A clean impalement.
“Yas! My 2021st kill!” Annie exclaims as the scythe… somehow returns to her hand from thin air.
Or wait, is that a metal string? And those gloves on her hand? That faint blue ominous glow. Could it be?
“Ok, so I can’t beat her yet,” Ruby finally admits. “But Jian has punk written all over him, so I bet I could knock his ass out.”
“HAH!” Jian yells as he delivers a killer roundhouse kick to the zombie, knocking its head right off.
“While most people prefer weapons,” Scarlett explains. “Jian prefers “beatin’ the shit out of zombies with his bare hands and feet,” she says in air quotes.
“That’s quite a sight,” a familiar woman’s voice states in a calm tone.
“Sonya!” Rachel yells as she hugs Sonya.
“Guys!” Duy yells out in excitement.
“And we’ve brought friends. Old and new ones,” Sonya explains. “Our new ones are waiting for us, while the old one is already here.”
Old one?
“Heh. Did ya’ll miss me?” Teresa says as a soldier pushes her in her wheelchair.
Teresa…
“Teresa!” Ruby cries in tears as the two exchange hugs.
“It looks like you finally turned me into a jailbird, Ruby,” Teresa says in tears.
“You don’t know how much I’ve missed you and your big head,” Ruby laughs.
“We’ll have to cut this reunion short,” Sonya interrupts. “General Farrington has been arrested, and Angela Blackwood is heading this way as we speak. Thankfully, we’ll be traveling to Athens with two Athenians who will be escorting us. The fastest way to Athens is to cut through the Gulf of Mexico, but the waters are far too dangerous to risk a trip with this many people. We barely made it back here ourselves.”
“So, The Mighty Squad Zeus will be going rogue as they take their chances in The New World,” Commander Zhi says in a calm tone.
“You got a problem with that?” Duy asks.
“No problem at all, seeing as to how you guys managed to escape from us,” Commander Zhi says with a soft grin.
“Thank you, Commander,” Duy says.
“But beware!” Annie exclaims. “The New World ain’t nothing like the undead forest or Winner, South Dakota. Like love, it’s a giant, swirly cesspool of mayhem! You must stay on your p’s and q’s at all times if you want to survive, but sometimes that’s not even enough! Sometimes, you just get fuuuuucked by life, and die like “bleh” no matter what you do! The New World is brimming with tons and tons of dangers such as millions, billions and kajillion zombies, powerful mutated, The Suicide Gates, The Deadliest Kingdom, mercenaries, The Seven Sharks, The gorgon sisters, the Seven Wonderful Wonders, the meanie Royals, The King of Scorpius, but the most important dangerous foe is… eh, it don’t matter,” she says as she rambles to her pet spider. “Ya’ll won’t even get that far because Squad Zeus is a rookie squad filled with babies who poop their pants! And, and STAY SAFE YA’LL! I love all of you equally, but I love Ruby the most! X-O…x…o,” she explains as she slowly curls herself into a ball and passes out.
Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it. You really are wise, Teresa.
“One more thing,” Sonya says with a grin as she glances down the hill. “You can come out now!”
I can’t believe it. How?!
“Hello, Drew,” Jaliyah says as she rushes to hug me.
Jaliyah?!
“What the hell are you doing here?” I say as I hug her back.
“Ooh. Just because you’re eighteen doesn’t mean you can swear. If I can’t swear, then you can’t either,” Jaliyah says with a chuckle. “It’s not just me, by the way. Everyone’s parents are here!” She says with a big smile. “The soldiers brought us here so we can send off you vile miscreants as you transition into a life of crime!”
You shouldn’t be so enthusiastic about this.
“Well, Ruby,” Scarlett says in a slightly proud tone. “You always wanted to live outside the law,” she says as she gives Ruby a hug. “Do your best to stay safe. Mom will be watching over you, so make sure you “kick ass,” she says in tears.
“Scarlett, ya crybaby!” Ruby says with a voice crack as she returns the hug. “If you start crying then I’ll start to…,” Ruby says as she cries.
“I know. I know. You’re my baby sister for a reason,” Scarlett says with a laugh as she wipes off her sister’s tears.
“Scarlett, I’m… I’m sorry for breaking your glasses all those years ago,” Ruby says as the two end the hug. “I never apologized for it, k? I was being a major brat, and I just wanted to apologize, before Evil on Tour begins its world tour,” Ruby says in a heartfelt tone.
“I’m sorry for socking you in the mouth and abandoning you,” Scarlett apologizes. “I was just so sad. I should’ve been there for you when you needed someone the most. I’m the worst sister in the world.”
“No, Scarlett. You’re the big sister for a reason because you’re the best. I couldn’t ask for a better sister. I mean, I wouldn’t have minded a cooler one though,” Ruby says with a soft smile.
“So, the baby finally admits that I’m the best,” Scarlett laughs.
“Yeah, the best at being laaaaame!” Ruby laughs out loud. “Scar, let’s say it. Come on.”
“Sigh. Fine,” Scarlett reluctantly agrees with a grin as she shakes her head.
“The,” Ruby and Scarlett begin to say in unison. “Notorious, Punk Rock, Guitar Playing, Explosively Unpredictable, Unstoppable Redhead, Lead singer of “Evil on Tour; The AMAZING Ruby Redheart! And, The Infamous, Bona Fide, Bass playing, Limitless Intellectual, Fierce Redhead, The Best Sister in The Whole Freakin’ World, The MAGNIFICENT Scarleeeeeeet Redheart!”
“My eldest children have earned a place on the most wanted list!” Rachel and Billy’s Pa yells out in a proud voice.
That’s nothing to be proud of.
“I’m so sad, and yet so proud!” Their Pa says as he gives them a tight hug. “I just want you two to stay safe as best you can and protect your friends! Remember, we Coopers are unstoppable! We’re prepared for all the shit the world will throw at us, and nothing will stop us from reclaiming Brackettville!”
“We’ll make you proud, Pa,” Billy replies.
“As long as I find root beer and bubblegum, then I’ll be able to conquer anything!” Rachel says as she smacks her stale bubblegum.
“Teresa, I have to tell you something,” Duy says as he approaches Teresa.
“Just because I can’t move my legs doesn’t change anything,” Teresa says as she crosses her arms.
“But?” Duy continues to approach.
“No ifs, ands, big butts, or whatchamacallits, Duy,” Teresa denies as she shakes her head. “Oh god, you’re too tall,” she says as Duy kneels to reach eye-level. “Heh,” she chuckles as her face glows red. “I-I think you skipped a few steps.”
“I’ve put you in check, Teresa,” Duy says as he leans forward and kisses her. “I’ll put you in checkmate when I come back,” Duy states after he finishes.
“Y-you better not flirt with any women out there,” Teresa says in embarrassment. “I’m warning you, Duy. Women are more terrifying than zombies when enraged.”
“You fool!” Ruby blurts out. “You gotta give a kiss on the lips,” she says as she grabs me. “Like this!”
Ruby?!
“The hell are you looking at, Drew?!” Ruby yells as she looks at me with a mixture of emotions. “You were never going to make the first move!!!” She says as her face glows red.
“Yay!” Jaliyah yells out as she claps her hands. “I can finally plan out the wedding!”
“Are you sure about this, Ruby?” I ask.
“We are about to march into a shitpool of shit, so it’s only right that yours truly begins her amazing transition into the new, improved, always cool, me.”
“Luke!” Sonya says with a warm smile as she quickly approaches the elevator.
“They briefed me on everything,” Luke says as the two hug.
“Luke Miller!” Ruby yells as she points a finger at Luke. “You have superpowers now, which means we’re unstoppable! The Royals can’t compete with you in a contest of hands anymore!”
“Ruby, you’re forgetting about Veronica,” Luke explains as he holds his head in pain.
“She can get the hands too,” Ruby says as she shrugs.
“No, she’s my guardian. I have to find out where she is, what she did to me, how, and why,” Luke says.
“We already know what she did, silly. She turned you into a badass,” Ruby clarifies in excitement.
“No, I feel like a monster,” Luke says in sadness.
“I think we should come up with a better plan once we reach Athens,” Duy announces.
“Heh. Well, whatever you guys decide to do,” Teresa says. “… just make sure that you kick ass. I’ve already predicted our fate, remember? Defeating Angela Blackwood and the Death Angels is just the first step in our perilous quest for safety and answers. You delinquents better stay safe! And bring back souvenirs!”
*
END OF ACT 3: Minerva