“Manami… wake up.”

The first thing that comes into view is my little brother smiling at me. I pinched his cheeks as punishment for waking me up so early. “What time is it?”

“9.”

“I should get up then.” I walk into the bathroom and begin brushing my teeth.

For the past two and a half months, I’ve found myself smiling at my reflection.

I owe that to a certain boy who asked me to be his girlfriend. Even while knowing about my condition, he’s helped me become more positive and enjoy what time I have left. For all he has done, I hope I can show him even a small amount of my gratitude.

Just yesterday, he carried me up the mountain on our island. It’s a moment I’ll carry with me forever. But I’m still in disbelief at what I did when we reached the peak. I must have been out of my mind.

“But he liked it I think.” I run my finger across my lips, the sensation still lingering on them.

“Manami.” My mom walks into my bathroom. “We need to hurry; your doctor wanted us to be there early.”

“Ok mom.” I put my toothbrush away and looked for some clothes.

“You fell asleep right away yesterday, how was it?”

“It was amazing. I could never thank him enough.”

My mom picked up the clothes I threw behind me. “Hmmm, I think that kiss may have been enough for him.”

“Huh?! Dad saw that?!” I yelped with embarrassment.

“His friends did too, unfortunately he didn’t get a picture.”

“Ugh, how embarrassing.” After putting on a dress, my mom shows me a picture on a camera.

“He took some really good pictures.”

It’s a picture of me amazed at the view of the mountain. Myo. Always staring at me with sincere fascination. He calls me beautiful or gorgeous every chance he gets. Even after seeing a different, vulnerable me, the way he looked at me never changed.

I can feel it every time. His gaze as he refuses to enjoy anything else. Not in the way other boys look at me. His gaze is comforting. And I hope he can look at me like that for as long as we are together.

“Three weeks.”

I nod as my doctor gives me my results. After many tests and diagnosis, they estimated the time I had left. It was never certain before, but my body had begun to decline at a rapid rate. It wasn’t all that visible from the outside, but I could feel myself losing more energy every day.

“Thank you.” I nod at the doctor.

“If there’s anything you need, I’ll be in my office.” The doctor bows and leaves the room.

My family did their best to keep their composure. Even my little brother, Miko, who was beginning to understand the meaning of death, tried to remain strong.

But I cried. “I’m sorry. Mom, Dad, Miko. For once, I’m sad about dying.” No longer needing to hide their tears, my family embraces me before we leave.

Outside the hospital, someone called my name. “Manami.” Turning around, I noticed the pretty volunteer wave for me to come over.

“I’ll be right back mom.” I wave to my mom as I walk over to the volunteer. “Hi, I don’t think we’ve met before. I’m Manami.”

“Manami, I’m Veronica. Myo’s mother.”

It took a moment to process what she said. After taking a good look, I could see her eyes and nose on Myo. She looks so young that I never suspected the connection. “I’m…”

“I know. Can I talk to you?”

We sit on a bench looking out into the ocean. “Did something happen today?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Well, Myo left in a hurry not too long ago. He’s been so happy for a while, have you two broken up?" She asked in a voice filled with concern.

“No…” I hoped I was wrong, but there is only one thing I could think of that would affect Myo. “He must have heard.”

“Heard what?”

“I have three weeks left.” After taking a moment to process the information, Veronica embraces me.

“I’m so sorry.” I rub her back as she cries. I felt guilty breaking her heart, but when she looked at me, I only saw the warm eyes of a caring mother. “I’m sorry Manami, but I need you to do something for me.”

“What is it?” I asked, though I had little clue as to what I could do for her.

“Myo… I need you to save Myo.”

“Save him? Is he sick?”

She shakes her head. “Myo hasn’t told you about his past, has he?”

He hasn’t. And I’ve been so engrossed in the wonderful days he’s given me that I never returned the kindness. It made my stomach turn at how I’ve been to the guy who treasured me. “No.”

“I knew it. I’ll tell you.”

·

Myo, an eight-year-old boy with short hair and bruises around his body from getting into skirmishes with the other groups of boys, runs into his house before his mom can notice he returned after curfew.

“Hah, nailed it once again.” He says in a triumphant tone.

“And what did we nail?” His mom said as she turned the corner that led from the kitchen into the hallway by the main door of their home. She held a sandal in one hand while the other was free to grab the boy who would attempt to flee.

“I have a good explanation!” He yelled. “I was looking for flowers with Diana and Toro.”

“Really.” She pinches his cheek which receives a big yelp of pain in return. “So, looking for flowers must be quite dangerous by the look of the bruises on your face.”

“Wait! I have a good explanation for that as well.”

His mom released his cheek. And for a moment, they waited for his explanation. But it never came, instead he bolts past his mom who doesn’t react in time to catch him. He was free and bound for his room until his father appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

“Woah there, you know mom doesn’t like running in the house.” The interference was enough for the looming monster behind Myo to catch up and give out due punishment.

Myo crawled into his room. Bottom sore after his mom was done with him. “Meany.” He muttered. The booming response from his mom made him send apologies right after.

After he is done groveling, he sits at his windowsill and looks at the window of the house across from his.

After some time, the light in the room turns on and the window opens. From within, a girl his age with long purple hair, orange eyes, and dirty clothes pops her head out. “Get in trouble?” She asked.

“Yea, my butt’s not doing too well.”

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

“Well, if y’all weren’t so darn worried about looking tough, we wouldn’t be in this mess.” She replied. Keeping her eye contact to a minimum.

“Huh?!” Myo replied, almost jumping into her room. “If I remember correctly, it was you who told them you would never date some weird loser.”

“Who?”

“You, the oh so beautiful Diana.”

“Aw, you think I’m beautiful?”

Myo rubbed his arm. “I’m just repeating what they said.”

Diana seemed disappointed by the answer. “Thanks Myo. For always sticking up for me and Toro.”

“Hmph, I’m just doing it so I can guilt you both into taking care of me when he goes pro, and you become a model.”

“Ohhh, a model.” Myo nodded and Diana continued with a new sense of pride. “You must really think I’m pretty.”

“Huh?! Well, you still need to learn how to eat and stuff.”

“What model’s going around showing off their eating?” She replied in an irritated tone. But her tone became somber next. “Myo, how’s Toshi?”

Myo leans back against the windowsill. “He’s been doing better, I think. I’m visiting tomorrow.”

“That’s why you wanted to look at flowers? Thought you finally got a crush.” She replied.

“Na, I’m not good with girls.”

“Hey!” She threw a pencil at him. “What’s that make me?”

Myo rubbed the impact zone and thought about it. He never gave it thought before. “You’re a girl but I like hanging around you.”

“Oh, I see.” She replied, her smile hidden by the darkness between them.

The next day, Myo returned to pick some flowers for his little brother. Toshi had been sick since he was born. He was in and out of hospitals but had a good streak of health before the start of last month. The sudden decline caught the family by surprise and Myo had only seen him once since then.

I want to do something for him. Myo often thought. But there was little a young boy could do. He hoped that the gesture of flowers would brighten Toshi’s day even if just a little.

“There.” Myo finds Toshi’s favorite flower. Chrysanthemums, bright pink and beautiful. Toshi always grabbed one when they passed this area on a walk.

Myo picks up a handful and heads back home. He finds Toro and Diana on his way back.

“Look what I found.” He holds his flowers in the air like a trophy.

“Woah, good job big bro.” Toro replies. Diana stepped behind Toro and didn’t respond.

“You ok, Diana?” Myo gets close to Diana, but she avoids him by circling around Toro. Hmph, must be mad about what I said yesterday. “Well, I have to go. See you tomorrow.”

He could hear Toro and Diana murmur behind him but was already running late.

After a scolding from his mom, the family departs for the local children’s hospital. His mom and dad didn’t look excited to visit Toshi. Their faces were grim, as if expecting bad news when arriving at the hospital.

Myo didn’t notice, his legs couldn’t stay still knowing that he could see his brother after a long time.

When they arrive, he gathers his flowers and rushes to his brother’s room. His mom yelled at him to slow down.

Toshi’s room was on the second floor. “Take a right then second door on the left.” Myo repeated as he climbed the stairs. After knocking on the door, he steps inside. “Toshi?”

Toshi was sitting up on his bed as he stared out into the ocean. “Hmm? Oh, Myo!” His face lit up. But not as much as Toshi would have liked, he struggled to show a smile.

“Look.” Myo handed him the flowers.

“I love these.” Toshi takes a big whiff of the flowers. “Thank you.”

“How are you feeling?” Myo pulls a chair and sits.

“Tired… could you tell me stories again?”

“Sure.” Their parents walk in as Myo tells Toshi stories about his adventures on the island. There were fights, games with his closest friends, and even close calls with the local police.

Toshi was immersed in his brother’s tales that were his only escape to the outside world. Even when he wasn’t stuck in a hospital bed, his body was too weak for him to venture outside often like his older brother did. But his brother never failed to describe the wonderful things Toshi sometimes saw through windows.

“When you get out of here, we’ll go to the beach.”

“I’d like that.” Toshi responds. Afterwards, their parents walk over and talk with Toshi.

Once again, their faces were grim.

Myo left for a bathroom break. He muttered to himself as he washed his hands. “Why’s everyone so sad?” As he looked in the mirror, he heard a voice behind him. He couldn’t make out what they said, but they sounded distant as if taking their leave. When he turned to check, no one was behind him.

When exiting the bathroom, a nurse runs by Myo and into Toshi’s room. The squeal of a heart monitor flatlining could be heard down the hallway.

Myo was oblivious to what that meant.

As he walks over, his mom stumbles backwards out of the room. She covered her mouth with her hands. Myo stepped behind her and noticed the doctor over Toshi pushing his chest in and out as if pumping air.

“Hey!” Myo yelled, concerned that his brother might get hurt from the force the doctor was using.

His mom turns and pulls Myo into her chest, restricting his view of what was going on inside the room.

“Mom… Toshi.” Is all that Myo could muster in between breaths as his mom suffocated him.

“Don’t look.” She muttered.

Myo felt hot drips of water fall down his back. “Mom, are you crying? What’s wrong?” He tapped her back to console her, but still didn’t understand what was going on.

After some time, he heard a heart wrenching yell from his dad as the doctor began saying the date and some other things that Myo didn’t catch.

“Mom, what’s wrong?”

She grabs his shoulders and musters the strength to speak through her tears. “Myo I’m so sorry. Toshi is dead.”

“…Dead?” He muttered.

The drive home was silent. Myo didn’t whimper like his parents. He didn’t understand what death meant. Did he just get sick again? When will I see him again?

His parents went into the living room and embraced each other after they arrived home. While his mom was able to put on a brave face, his dad seemed inconsolable.

For the next few days, his parents were somber. His mom did her best to greet him with some cheer, but his dad was silent with red, puffy eyes.

Since it was summer break, Myo and Toro spent most of their day walking around the island and playing games. “Diana’s coming back today, right?”

“Yea… I think she wants to talk to you.” Toro replied as they looked up at the sky while sitting under the shade of a tree.

“Then why does she always avoid me? Hmph, girls.” Myo said in a frustrated tone. Not at Diana, but a lingering feeling inside that bothered him. It continued to grow every day that passed since the hospital visit. But his parents were evasive whenever he brought the topic up.

“Just give her a chance later.” Toro replied. “Hey, isn’t that your dad?”

Myo looks up to find his dad walking away from their home. “Where’s he going?”

“Hmmm, in that direction there’s the children’s hospital, the mountain… maybe the bridge? Want to go after him?”

Myo looks over as his dad disappears behind some buildings. “Na, he hasn’t been talking to me lately. Should probably leave him alone for now.”

The frustration continued through the evening. He stared at his roof until he heard tapping on his window.

“What do you want?” He joked as he opened his window to find the culprit.

“Well, I thought you might want to see me. The beautiful model who just got back from a shoot. Consider yourself lucky.” She raised her shoulders and expected him to agree.

“Why do you do that?”

“Do what?” She replied.

“You hide your accent sometimes.”

“…Mom says city folk won’t like my accent.”

Myo tosses her missing pencil at her. “Well, I like it, so don’t hide it from me.”

Diana rubbed her forehead and smiled. “Ok. How’s Toshi?”

Myo sighed and sat on his windowsill. “It was good then everyone started freaking out. Mom said he’s dead.” Myo turned to look at Diana after he heard sniffles coming from her. She was crying. “What’s wrong?”

“Myo… don’t you know what death means?”

“No, what does it mean?”

“It means Toshi is never coming back.”

Myo sat in disbelief for a moment. That wasn’t possible, Toshi was just sick and needed to recover. But then what else could make his parents look so distraught? The more he thought about it, the more the aching feeling inside began to overflow.

He rushed downstairs to find his mom walking back and forth while calling someone on the phone. “Myo!” She yelled when she saw him. “Have you seen your dad?!”

“Dad? I did earlier, saw him walk up the street from the park.”

“Up the street from the park… no.” His mom swings the door open as headlights flash into their driveway.

It was Toro and his parents. Toro jumps out as Myo’s mom takes his seat and yells, “The bridge!” The car’s tires squeal and they speed off for the bridge.

“The bridge?” Toro muttered. “What’s going on?”

“I don’t know, but I’m going to follow them. Stay inside if you want.”

Myo grabbed his bike and peddled as fast as he could. His mind was still filled with the idea that Toshi was gone forever. It was starting to sink, but he denied the possibility. Not until he heard it from his parents.

He arrived at the bridge entrance. He could see Toro’s car pulled over. As he peddled farther, figures standing on the side of the bridge and looking to the rails appeared. Their mothers were talking to someone ahead of them.

It was his dad. Standing on top of the rail.

His mom jumped forward with her hand out.

His dad was gone.

“Dad!” Myo arrived beside his mom. Both parents on the bridge had horrified faces. “Dad!” Myo yelled over the bridge.

Myo is pulled into his mom’s chest, just like at the hospital. He didn’t feel her tears rush down his back or the tightness of her hold. His mind was rushing to process the scene, his body felt heavy, and his breathing became erratic.

“Mom… is dad dead?”

Myo didn’t leave his room for a week. His mom visited him, brought him food, and attempted to start a conversation. But Myo was unresponsive as he sat on the floor.

Death. He repeated in his mind. I’ll never see them again. Each repetition draws more tears from eyes that should have dried out long ago. I want to see them again.

Toro and Diana also visited him as well. Toro would ask him to come play. Diana kneeled beside him and would apologize. Myo didn’t know what for.

As they left, Diana cried into her hands and muttered. “I should have never told him.”

The culmination of his thoughts and newfound emotions led him to a conclusion. He could see them again. Yea. Dad must have missed Toshi. That’s why he did that. I… I want to see them again.

Myo stares off into the vast sea. The same view as his dad a week ago. The wind washing his body was liberating.

As his vision began to blur, he could hear Toshi and his dad in the distance. “I’m on my way.” Myo lets his body fall forward.

Myo is yanked back and slammed onto the floor. His mom picked him up and shook him a few times. “Why?!” She rested her head against his chest as she wailed. “Please don’t leave me! Please don’t leave me! Stay with me Myo! I… I can’t lose you too.” She muttered her last sentence.

·

“I did that.” Veronica cried. “I didn’t say don’t die. I didn’t say you deserve to live, or it’ll get better. No, I just said that… how selfish could I be.”

I also had tears in my eyes. Hearing about Myo’s past was heart wrenching. The boy who did all he could to see my smile. I could never have imagined what he buried inside himself.

Veronica continues. “I made him the way he is now. How he doesn’t show his true emotions anymore, keeping it all inside but one day it’ll destroy him.” She clenched my hand. “So please… please save Myo.”

I pull her head onto my shoulder as she continues to cry. “I’ll do my best, but I’ll need everyone’s help.”