Today’s the day. I’m going to ask the girl of my dreams to be my girlfriend.
It’s safe to say that I’m nervous.
I washed my clothes yesterday and added extra softener for the smell. It smells great, but I managed to burn a small spot on the sleeve while ironing my shirt.
I blame that on my active imagination. I can’t help being happy as my mind decides to play an early screening of the school’s biggest event of the year. It’s the classic rooftop confession, and then, a smile from the distant girl who accepts and embraces the guy she happened to admire in secret.
It’s perfect, so I give compliments to my brain. But having to run another load and keep it a secret from my mom may have been too steep a price.
No matter, I may be sleep-deprived and wearing my second-choice shirt that’s too large but I’m more confident than ever. All because of preparation.
Being unable to sleep is terrible and I don’t wish it on anyone, but I used that time to run over the scenario more times than I care to remember. By now I can recite my confession as if by instinct.
I button my shirt, toss on a tie, and stare into the mirror. “Manami, thank you for meeting me.” Perfect.
“Sure thing, Myo.” I’m doing my best to imitate her voice. As I’ve never heard more than one-word responses from her, I’m taking the liberty of filling in her lines.
They may not be accurate but I’m sure there’s a resemblance. Also, the romantic atmosphere of a boy pulling out every ounce of courage to confess his love is sure to win her over.
“Ahem. Manami, I-I think you’re a fan and I’ve been beautiful since the first day of class!” That wasn’t right. A few more practice runs should settle the butterflies in my stomach.
It’s unlike me. Not to boast, but I consider myself one of the bravest guys in my class. Maybe even the school.
I’ve climbed trees, run from teachers after being caught playing football during study period, and even snuck out a few times at night. Not once did I lose my composure.
But whenever I talk to Manami, or make the attempt at least, I’m nervous. I lose focus, and I find myself anxious for her answer. But I enjoy that feeling. For her to have that effect on me is what draws me in even more.
One more time. “Manami- “
“Myo! You’ll miss the train if you don’t leave now. I’m not taking you to school today.”
One added difficulty to falling asleep late is that it’s almost guaranteed you’ll wake up later than expected. I had done just that, and now, I’ve lost valuable preparation time.
I have a plan B, however. I’ve prepared for this day for so long that it’s natural to have a backup plan. A scene from my favorite romance show Jack of all trades. I’ve watched it enough to memorize the lines but still cry every time.
“Alright.” One final check in the mirror and I’m off for school. There’s no time for breakfast but if I chug enough water, I should make it until lunch.
I walk to school most days. There’s a train station about a five-minute walk from my house. The train ride after is ten minutes with a short walk to school right after.
As I arrive at the station, I see my best friend, Toro, waiting on a bench. I nicknamed him Toro when we were five years old because he’s always been a larger kid. Even now, at the age of 15, he’s a good 190 cm.
Height, good looks, athletic, but timid and lacking in social skills. I have him beat in those two aspects. I’m able to meet and talk to anyone, though most girls are just using me for a pass to him. I don’t mind, the guy deserves some love.
“Yo, Toro, wake up late too?”
“Myo!” Toro stands and provides me with some nice shade. I’m 180 cm tall last I checked but the difference is still jarring. “I’ve been waiting for you, thought you chickened out on your big day.”
“Chickened out? When have you known me to do that?”
“Hahaha, you’re right. I hope things go well for you today.” Toro stands beside me as we wait for the train.
Neither of us are great students as one might notice by our thin backpacks. Toro has a future in sports if he can overcome his timid nature. Though tearing out that root may be impossible, even with my encouragement.
We’re the last two students to take the train at this station. The benefit is that there’ll be some free seats, but we run the risk of being late. I love trains, but they aren’t the most punctual form of transportation.
“Hey Myo, did you burn your shirt?”
“Huh?” I drop my bag and check the sleeve I burnt last night. There it is. A large, brown circle. If I run back home, I’ll miss the train but can grab a taxi.
“Want my shirt?” Toro was already unbuttoning his.
I let out a sigh. Despite the constant bumps at the start of my day, I wouldn’t be the brave Myo if I allowed myself to be fazed by any of it. “It’s fine Toro; I’ll just rely on my boundless charisma. Also, your shirt is way too big for me.”
“Right, sorry.”
I pat him on the back and flash him a smile. “Don’t worry, it’s going to be a great day.”
If I could act this way and receive the same look of admiration Toro gave me around Manami, then I would be more confident in my words. But the spell she puts me under doesn’t allow it.
The train arrives three minutes late, not bad. We walk inside to find an empty car. In what the train lacked in timekeeping it made up for in cleanliness. The floors and windows sparkled, and the seats were maintained and replaced to always look new.
“Think we’ll make it?”
“At full speed, you can make it with time to spare. But with me on your back, I say we’ll be a minute late at least.”
“Why aren’t you running with me?”
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“Toro.” I grabbed his shoulder. “It wouldn’t do to get sweaty on my big day. I already have to deal with this burn mark.”
“I… guess you’re right.”
I give him a thumbs up. My best friend, always reliable and blessed with the physicality that will bring him great achievements. But for today, he’ll need to use it to get us to class on time.
The train screeches to a stop at our station and Toro bursts through the doors with me on his back. I might as well not exist as he ran with ease for our school.
“You’re doing great Toro!”
On our way there we passed some of Toro’s fans. All of them wave, say hi, or blow kisses his way. I take note of each girl who looks his way, one of them must be a good partner for him.
I do most of the talking when we’re around girls, always making sure to highlight his greatest characteristics. Tall, handsome, athletic. No. You won’t meet a more reliable and kind man than the one rushing to get us to class.
And he does just that. I stand at the gate of our school with time to spare, other students are still arriving as well.
Our school has two floors with the bottom being for the first two years and the upper floor for the remaining two years. The building has wooden planks on some windows, the color on the doors has long since faded away, and the gate doesn’t close anymore. Our sports facilities are top of the line, however.
Toro takes in one big whiff of air and his breathing calms.
“Hey, you’re not on PED’s, are you?”
“Ha of course not, I play three sports throughout the year you know.”
“If you say so.” As I finished, two of Toro’s teammates walked up to us. I saw them standing by the entrance as we arrived so they must have been waiting for us.
“Meet us in the gym after school.” Goon #1 looks up to Toro who shrank to his size at the confrontation.
Toro nods, keeping his head down as if making eye contact would be an act of aggression.
“Hey.” I step in between the two. I see goon #2 clench his fist but I raise my hands. “I thought there was no practice today.”
“There isn’t, but we need to meet. Or does his nanny not allow it?”
Before I can step in to close the gap, Toro grabs my shoulder. “It’s ok, they just want to talk.”
Liar. “Fine.” We walked off to class and I bumped into the goon nearest to me as I passed him.
Our classroom is already filled with students conversing, laughing, and doing their homework before class starts.
As we enter, most girls turn and wave at us. I flash them a smile and wave back only to receive irritated looks and sneers. “Hmph.” I scoff at them as Toro makes his way for his desk.
I have something important to do before I can sit.
Manami sits in the row of desks nearest to the class doors. “Alright.” I whispered after finding her. I walk over, stomach twisting and turning from my nervousness and the fact that I didn’t have breakfast. When I manage to drag myself to her desk, I mutter. “Good morning, Manami.”
She looks up to me. This may have been easier had she kept her face down. “Good morning, Myo.” Her voice like a sweet hum. But that wasn’t all that entranced me. She has black hair tied into a ponytail with bangs that stop just above her almond eyes. Her nose is small, and she has plump lips. While slim, her long legs seem endless and she has a decent bust, “Myo?”
“Oh!” I return to our planet. “Could you… meet me on the roof after school?”
She looks away from me with a quick turn and begins to write, but as she does, she whispers. “Sure.”
As she continued to write, I could see a faint red on her cheeks. Although, this could just be my sleep deprivation working together with the sudden rush of ecstasy to fool me.
“Good luck Myo.” Toro gives me a tap on the back, though his tap is much stronger than mine, and sends me off. But I must admit, the earlier interaction with Toro’s teammates has lingered on my mind the entire day.
Enough to throw me off as I head for my big moment. I got Manami to accept and meet me, I need to focus.
Manami always arrives first to class. Now that I’m at the foot of the stairs that lead to the roof, I’m sure she’ll already be there. Then, I just need to perform. And though I may want to throw up, have weak knees and a burnt shirt, one fact remains: I perform under pressure.
When it comes down to the last second, to the moment that matters the most, I’ll perform. Always have. I’ll just continue that streak.
|||
Toro is slammed into the gym wall. There was a break for after-school activities this week, so the gym is empty, and most students have gone home. It’s a perfect opportunity for the two students towering above Toro to release their frustration towards him.
“Damn it, Toro! Every time you break under the pressure!” The first guy kicks Toro on the side of the stomach.
“That body is wasted on you!” The second guy grabs Toro by his head.
Toro has tears in his eyes. He wanted to scream for help but knew no one would come. Even if he tried to overpower his teammates, they would only retaliate worse. So, he decided to just let it happen. Hoping that it will end soon.
“Answer us! Because of you, we can’t lose another game or we miss playoffs!” Another kick to the side.
Toro may crumble in important moments, but he is still a valuable player with lots of potential. It’s the reason they didn’t use full force with each hit.
“Hey Toro, you know what’ll happen next time, right?”
Toro looks up at his teammates, now with tears streaming down his face. He can’t make a promise he isn’t sure of. It’s far beyond his ability to keep his composure in stressful moments.
“I-I’m sorry.” Toro mutters.
“Sorry? You think-”
The students turned to look at the gym door that burst open
|||
“Damn!” Regret isn’t something I can live with. And in moments where either choice will leave me with some, I go with the one that makes me look cooler.
It might be overthinking it. I hope I am. But I know Toro better than anyone, so I can tell when he hides something from me.
I pushed through the gym doors and found Toro on the ground with the two teammates from earlier looking down at him.
“What are you doing here?”
I believe that’s what he said. My hearing had dulled as my mind processed the situation.
If there’s anything that I dislike about myself, it’s my short fuse. I like to say it’s genetic given how my father was, but it’s just my nature. I despise it, but in moments like this, I allow it to act free.
Whatever the student said next didn’t matter as my fist cut him off before he finished. Athlete or not, fighting experience gives me the edge in this situation.
“Myo!”
“Stay down Toro! If you get caught fighting, you’ll be kicked off the team!” Although I would have liked for him to join me. The school is empty after all. But I love dramatics, and right now, I was making up for missing out on my big moment.
The first guy isn’t getting up from my blow, but his friend has a decent size advantage over me. Including his reach.
As I move in to get a blow, he hits me with a good shot that almost knocks me off balance. Basketball players have freakish arm lengths.
But it’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before.
He flails at me some more and is winded by his sixth attempt that I dodge with ease. I won’t be able to deal a good blow with our height difference; however, punching isn’t my only tool.
As he walks back to recover, I dash in low and grab him by his hip. He punches my back but soon finds himself rising into the air. Then, stepping and swinging my body forward to gain momentum, I slam him down. He lets out a gasp of air and slumps to his side.
I stare at him until I see his chest move up and down. “Oh, thank god, I didn’t kill him.” Confirming my victory, I helped Toro up and we left the gym.
About halfway to the entrance, Toro mutters a sentence. “Myo, I’m sorry you had to come save me.”
“Don’t ever say that!” Again, short fuse. I turned to look Toro in the eye. “Don’t ever keep something like that from me again ya hear! It doesn’t matter what I’m doing or what is going to happen. I’m your friend dammit.”
Toro nods.
“Now say it!”
Toro smiles. “You looked really cool big bro.”
“Damn right. Now let’s get some ramen.” With a pat on the back, Toro picks his head up.
“What about Manami?”
“Ahhh, she probably left already.”
We make our way to the gate until a voice calls out to us. “Um… excuse me.”
Turning to the voice, we find Manami leaving the main building entrance. “Didn’t you want to meet me on the roof?”
Manami scans both of us but takes a longer glance at me. My clothes are ripped, there’s a burn mark on my sleeve, and I have blood dripping from my mouth. Nothing has gone my way today, and I look like a delinquent who just beat up a guy twice my size, but an opportunity is better than none.
Being as tired as I am, I have no idea what to say. Plan B it is.
“Manami… I’m the type of guy that worries a lot. I do my best every day, but I always find myself asking if I could do more. And today, I want to do just that. I’ve fallen for you; will you be my girlfriend?” A perfect rendition. So much so that it can’t fail.
Manami seemed surprised by the sudden confession, as I expected. Her eyes conveyed more disgust than happiness, however, which set off a few alarms in my head. She shuffles around a bit and then takes a deep breath before answering.
“Sorry, but my answer is no.”