And so they began.
Snooze was unsure of how the process was likely to go, as she had no frame of reference for the best way of designing an Afterlife. Sure, she’d forged her own world, and another realm before that she’d seen as something of a tutorial, but this seemed like something unique and perhaps a bit more permanent. . She thought of that experience, and her first infant tiptoes into the reality of godhood. She missed that place so very much. It was her home for a vast sum of years, and even though she had been beyond it for far longer than she lived there, she was sure it was the most favorite of her creations.
Well, perhaps not her most favorite, but, easily in the top two. Her Meatlings were always near and dear to her little heart, and she was happy knowing that they still lived on in Rekvahn. She made a mental note, as protagonists are wont to do, to check in on the necromancer more frequently and make sure he didn’t need anything. Snooze thought it would be a shame if he were to suddenly come down with an undead flu, or slip while using the bathroom and fatally strike his head on the sink.
But, to the task at hand.
The Scroll of Currents was a delightfully precise instructor, weaving information and praise in a way that had the effect of making Snooze feel quite accomplished. She felt that with each passing hour--if you could call them that here-- she was becoming more knowledgeable, and dare she say, refined in her understanding of the process.
They began with Archetype selection. This was a seemingly simple process that had caused Snooze no amount of undue stress. That wasn’t sarcasm, she literally did not fret for a single second, nor weigh her options longer than it took to read them. The Scroll had populated a list, with minor descriptions, and Snooze read them over and decided quickly.
AFTERLIFE ARCHETYPES
YOU WILL BE TASKED WITH SELECTING THE APPROPRIATE MODE FOR YOUR AFTERLIFE. THINK OF THIS AS THE DEFAULT TONE YOU ARE SETTING FOR THE FORTUNATE (OR POOR) SOULS THAT WILL POPULATE THIS SPACE FOR THE LIMIT OF THEIR REMAINING EXISTENCE.
EACH ARCHETYPE HAS THEIR OWN LEVEL OF MAINTENANCE, AND MAY REQUIRE FREQUENT UPKEEP OR INTERACTION, FAILURE TO DO SO MAY DEJECT THE ALIGNMENT OF YOUR GODPATH. FURTHER DELINQUENCY MAY RESULT IN MILD TO MODERATE REPRIMAND.
CAREFULLY LOOK OVER THE CONTENTS OF THESE ARCHETYPES AND MAKE A SELECTION. ONCE YOU HAVE CONFIRMED, YOU MAY NOT CHANGE YOUR MIND. CHOOSE WISELY.
PLEASE NOTE: AT [ LEVEL 8 ] YOU HAVE ACCESS TO ONLY A FEW OPTIONS. MORE WILL BE ACCESSIBLE FURTHER DOWN THE TIMELINE AS YOU GROW AND GAIN MORE DISTINCT ABILITIES.
PLEASE NOTE: WITH [ HUMBLE - LEVEL 2 ] GODPATH, YOU HAVE GAINED ACCESS TO ADDITIONAL OPTIONS FOR AFTERLIFE ARCHETYPE.
BASIC AFTERLIFE ARCHETYPES
HEAVENLY:
THIS IS AN AFTERLIFE TYPIFIED BY SUNSHINE AND PUFFY CLOUDS. HERE, THE SOULS OF THE DEAD WILL FIND ETERNAL HAPPINESS REGARDLESS OF WHAT THEIR STATION IN LIFE WAS. SOULS RECEIVE THE JOY OF EXISTING IN THE SPLENDOR OF THEIR CREATOR, AND THE EXACT SPECIFICATIONS OF THEIR REALITY IS BASED ON THE POSITIVE WHIMS OF THE GOD CREATING THE AFTERLIFE.
PLEASE NOTE: THIS ARCHETYPE REQUIRES A HIGH-LEVEL OF MAINTENANCE AND SUPERVISION. NOT ADVISED FOR LOWER-LEVEL GODS.
HELLISH:
A PLACE OF PENITENCE AND TORMENT, THIS ARCHETYPE EXISTS TO PUNISH THOSE SOULS WHO WIND UP IN THIS REALM. THE EXACT SPECIFICATIONS OF THEIR REALITY IS BASED ON THE WHIMS OF THE GOD CREATING THE AFTERLIFE.
PLEASE NOTE: THIS ARCHETYPE REQUIRES A HIGH-LEVEL OF MAINTENANCE AND SUPERVISION. NOT ADVISED FOR LOWER-LEVEL GODS.
GRAY:
A WAITING PLACE FOR SOULS. THE GRAY IS SOMETHING OF A LIMBO, DESIGNED TO ALLOW THOSE WHO HAVE NOT BEEN VIRTUOUS (OR MET SOME OTHER REQUIREMENT) TO DWELL AND REFLECT.
PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A LOW-MAINTENANCE AFTERLIFE, HOWEVER, THERE COULD BE NEGATIVE EFFECTS TO THE GOD WHO UTILIZES THIS MANNER OF AFTERLIFE.
[ GODPATH HUMBLE - LEVEL 2 UNLOCKED ARCHETYPE(S) ]
WANDERING:
GHOSTS AND RESTLESS SPIRITS MAKE GREAT COMPANY IN THE BEYOND. AN AFTERLIFE DESIGNED TO ALLOW THE SOULS TO MOVE AS THEY WISH THROUGH THE VEIL OF THEIR FORMER LIFE. NEITHER A WEIGH-STATION, NOR A STIRRING REWARD OR PUNISHMENT, THIS IS CONSIDERED A HIGHLY NEUTRAL ZONE.
PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A LOW-MAINTENANCE AFTERLIFE, HOWEVER, THERE COULD BE NEGATIVE EFFECTS TO THE GOD WHO UTILIZES THIS MANNER OF AFTERLIFE.
DIVIDED:
THIS IS AN AFTERLIFE CLEARLY BISECTED BETWEEN TWO FORMS. THE EXACT PERIMETERS, ARCHETYPES, AND QUALIFIERS ARE DECIDED UPON BY THE GOD CREATING THE AFTERLIFE.
PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A MODIFIER AFTERLIFE, AND REQUIRES THE UPKEEP SPECIFIED BY EACH ARCHETYPE CONTAINED THEREIN. WHILE THIS IS LIMITED IN SCOPE AT LOWER LEVELS, AT HIGHER LEVELS (WITH MORE ACCESS TO ARCHETYPES) THIS BECOMES A POWERHOUSE ARCHETYPE, AND A GOD CAN GLEAN ADDITIONAL BOONS FOR PROVIDING VARIATION TO THE SOULS.
Snooze smiled.
“Wandering,” she said confidently.
“You’re more of the intuitive sort, I take it?” Scroll asked.
Snooze nodded.
“It seems the most fun.”
Grotto chuckled.
“You don’t say? Snooze, I do enjoy the mind inside of that godly dome of yourse,” the QUACK said, shaking her head in admiration. “You sure you want to go with that? It does require some specific components.”
“Yeah, I’m sure,” Snooze said. “It’s just…”
Grotto looked concerned.
“Oh, don’t worry, the components are fairly easy to create, you’ll do just fine.”
“No…” Snooze corrected. “It’s not that. I… I was wondering about reincarnation?”
Grotto seemed to relax, shooting Snooze an award-winning smile and theatrically wiping her brow.
“Oh, is that all? I thought you were going to throw me something wild like saying you wanted a super hell,” she shrugged her shoulders, then seemed to talk more to herself. “I mean, that’s technically a thing, but I don’t think we want to go down that road just yet. It gets a bit into the weeds on what is theoretically manageable…”
“Super hell?” Snooze laughed. “Sounds… super.”
“She’s not wrong,” Scroll piped up. “It’s a fearsome Archetype, available only to very specific God Paths. A mite of pure sunshine like yerself wouldn’t abide no benefit from piloting a place of that pernicious caliber.”
Snooze absolutely adored the way that the Scroll of Currents spoke, and vowed to adopt some of its more colorful slangs into her everyday lexicon. She shook her head.
“No, but, like I said…” she continued, rolling her eyes. “Reincarnation. That’s a thing, I know for a fact it’s a thing since, well, since that’s how I, and I assume, we, all got here.”
“It’s part true,” Scroll explained, and the blue orb buzzed over to where Snooze was staring out at the void before her. “Reincarnation is a possibility, but not at the moment for you. It’s an Archetype to be sure, but it takes a substantial and ornery cuss to get to the level required to implement it.”
This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.
“I have been led to believe that I am both substantial and ornery,” Snooze said with a smile.
“You are decidedly so,” Scroll said with a tut. “You got moxie to be feared, rest assured, little godling. But, it would take a miserable, long while to attain such storied heights in level as to acquire reincarnation.”
“So, if I understand correctly,” Snooze said. “Where I am originally from, the god there is very high level, then?”
“It ain’t exactly that simple,” Scroll explained. “To muddy the waters a bit more on this talk, there’s two types of reincarnation. The Archetype variety, and the more singular type that you happened to hang over your celestial mantle.”
“Ah,” Snooze said. “So, if I’m connecting the dots properly--and sometimes I don’t, so please feel free to correct me--there’s the Archetype version, where a group will automatically be reincarnated, and a more special kind? So, I was the exception, and not the rule?”
“Boy howdy, I done knew you were sharp, but that’s an awe-inspiring amount of deduction, little lady,” Scroll extolled. “You hear that, Grotto? Snooze is a whip, to be sure.”
Snooze beamed at the little blue orb.
“Thanks, I’m very advanced.”
Grotto sidled up to the two and nudged Snooze.
“We can get into the specifics of reincarnation later, assuming I’m still around when you get to the point that you can utilize it,” she said with a wink. “But, if you do have any questions about your particular brand of rebirth, I don’t know if I’m qualified to answer.”
The thought of losing Grotto as her QUACK made Snooze extra sad. Their time together was limited, an so far, the awkward, goofy, wonderful Chief Administrator was the closest thing she’d had to a full-fledged mentor in this life. The Book of Leaf was decent, but was more interested in allowing her the opportunities to figure things out on her own--not that she wasn’t appreciative of such a bearing-- she just liked having someone with a bit of… zest, to ruminate over things.
Grotto’s second statement finally registered with Snooze, and she gave the QUACK a curious look.
“My brand? So, the special cases aren’t so cut and dry?”
“That is correct,” Grotto explained, producing an apple from nothing and biting into it. “Eben somma da Ubber Cust don’ know da ‘zact mefod i’ ‘abbens.”
Her munching had distorted her words, but Snooze thought that she mostly understood it. Fortunately, she’d at one time dreamed of being a dentist in her former life, and though she found herself woefully overwhelmed by the amount of schooling involved in such a pursuit, she had scored full marks in “obstructed conversation,” a class at the college of dentistry that exists, but is never talked about. How else do you think Teeth Wizards (as they refer to themselves) learn to carry on long conversations with their fingers and tools practically scraping one’s uvula?
“Ah, there’s a bit of mystery!” Snooze exclaimed excitedly. “That’s cool. Honestly, if I knew the perimeters under which I was selected--if I was selected-- it would probably ruin the intrigue.
Unfortunately, Snooze was correct. The particular methodology behind her ascent to her godly position was something that would indeed spoil the mystery for her, and reveal some uncomfortable complications. Double unfortunately, she would eventually learn these things, to disastrous results. But, let’s not focus on that now.
“So, now that you’ve selected which manner of Archetype you’re hankerin’ to wrangle, we can begin,” Scroll said, floating away from the two women and into the stretch of void that they had established as their Contour for the Afterlife.
“Snooze, in order to utilize this particular Afterlife, you will need to decide if’n you’d like to use a fabricated location just for this occasion, or whether it might be a grain less mean to your sense to stick them restless waywards onto the planet you’ve already hewn.”
“So, I can make a completely new Afterlife, or let them roam on Savvy?” Snooze asked.
“You can’t tell, but I’m winking at you with pride, little lady,” Scroll said. “That’s exactly what your options are.”
“Well, I mean, I would love to make one, if that’s possible?” She bit her lower lip in thought.
Grotto patted her on the shoulder, having finished her meal and gave Snooze an appraising look.
“You alright, Snoozie-Q? You look like you have another question.”
Snooze nodded slowly, then looked into Grotto’s eyes.
“So, I don’t have access to my Earth godspell anymore, is that going to be a problem?”
Grotto’s concern turned into another wide smile and she released a peal of laughter.
“Oh, of course not!” she exclaimed, wriggling her body in a strange fashion. To Snooze it looked like a very bad, or uncoordinated dance routine. Grotto shifted from one foot to the next, and then spun in place.
“What… are you doing?” Snooze asked. “Is that some sort of rain dance, but for like, the Afterlife?”
Grotto chuckled.
“Nope,” she said simply. “Just vibing.”
“I love it,” Snooze said, and without further prompting, she began a careful pantomime of the steps that Grotto was engaging in. After a few moments (for they were quite simple maneuvers) the two of them were twirling around the blank stretch of nothing. Snooze noticed that somewhere, though she wasn’t sure from where, she could hear music beginning to play. An upbeat-tempo song that matched the pace of their movements.
Always time to drop the narrative for a focus on awkwardly-placed dancing, wouldn’t you say? At the very least, they were having fun.
Eventually the two women caught one another’s eye and suddenly erupted in laughter.
“Doesn’t that feel better?” Grotto asked, coming to a stop and placing her hands on her hips.
“I don’t think I’ve done any dancing since… well, before.”
“Oh, Snooze,” Grotto said. “You’ve got to do it more often than never. By the Powers That Be, it’s quite freeing. You can have a heap of responsibilities piling up as a celestial, and sometimes, you just need to stop what you’re in the middle of and do something nonsensical. It’s cathartic.”
Snooze nodded. It had been enjoyable, to be sure. There was something extremely liberating about just throwing godly propriety out of the plane and acting foolish with your friends.
After a few more moments of general tomfoolery, the three of them set out to continue, with the Scroll of Currents acting as point-man as it surveyed the area. Snooze wasn’t sure what it was doing, but it made a lot of “hmm”ing sounds and seemed to be calculating something.
That was exactly what the Scroll of Currents was doing. It had begun taking measurements of the space, zooming out beyond their unenhanced sight and returning after a few minutes. Snooze wondered why the Scroll hadn’t been doing that while they were dancing, but then chided herself. Could she expect the creature to do the work during a time when she, herself, was not doing anything other than flailing to a mysterious tune? No, she thought, that wouldn’t be fair.
Work at your own pace, little cowboy.
In the meantime, she noticed Grotto hadn’t taken any proactive approaches to their task, so assumed she was waiting for the Scroll of Currents to finish up with the numerical scan. So Snooze delighted herself by picking up the strand of conversation where they left off.
“So you said that not having access to my Earth spell won’t be an issue, correct?” Snooze asked.
“That’s right, Snooze,” Grotto said. “Especially considering you will be utilizing the Seed of Life for the formation.”
Snooze paused.
“The Seed of Life?”
“Yes,” Grotto said. “You should have received an extra one as a way of saying sorry, right?”
“Oh, yeah!” She suddenly remembered. “The one that was given as a gift to me when Odd arrived!”
“That’s the one,” Grotto said, nodding. “Do you have it handy?”
Snooze held a finger in the air, looking around for her second Archangel. She couldn’t see Odd anywhere, but it didn’t matter. The creature had a curious affinity for arriving when its name was mentioned.
“Odd,” she said quietly.
“I’M ODD!” a tiny voice ejected. Suddenly, in the distance, the miniscule form of her Archangel came barreling along, huffing as it did so. After a few long moments, it slid to a stop next to Snooze’s foot and doubled over, gasping for air.
“You alright, buddy?” Snooze asked.
“YEAH!” Odd said, and took another gasping breath. “I’m *wheeze* always *wheeze* ready!”
Snooze leaned down and scooped the creature up, bringing it to eye level. Odd didn’t see it coming and screamed out.
“UNHAND ME FOUL CREATURE!” It bellowed in it’s high, child-like pitch. “You will rue the day you put your grubby mitts on me! I’M NOT AFRAID TO GO BACK TO JAIL!”
Snooze chuckled. Everything Odd said or did was wildly contrasting to its minute frame. She blinked at it until it realized where it actually was.
“AHA!” Odd exclaimed. “Victorious again!”
“Odd,” Snooze said with a loving sigh.
“That’s me!”
“Yep,” she said. “Do you have the Seed of Life you were supposed to give me as a gift?”
“Yep!” Odd shouted exuberantly. “I almost traded it for a cool pet flea, but the plug never showed up with the goods!”
Snooze raised an eyebrow.
“Really?”
Odd stared at her for a moment.
“MAYBE!”
“Can I have it?”
“YOU GOT IT, BUB!” Odd exclaimed, and dug into its person. From somewhere, perhaps a tiny pocket, it produced the shimmering light of the Seed of Life.
“As you command, my dark lord!”
Snooze just rolled her eyes. It seemed that daily, her official title ranged from something dark and nefarious, to a pillar of shining goodness in Odd’s eyes. She really didn’t think she could ever figure out what was going on behind that single eye.
“Perfect!” Grotto said and reached out before freezing.
“Oh, er, is it okay if I use it?”
“GET YOUR--” Odd started, but Snooze covered its mouth-eye with her hand to silence it, while Odd continued loudly proclaiming its oaths beneath her palm.
“It’s fine,” she offered to Grotto. The QUACK winked at her and snatched up the Seed of Life, tossing it in the air and catching it with a flourish.
“M’lady,” Grotto said to Snooze with a bow. “Allow me to show you something wonderf--”
The QUACK stopped suddenly. Instantly, her eyes flashed to the hand holding the orb of light and a horrified expression painted her face.
“Grotto?” Snooze demanded, fear enveloping her. “Are you pulling a prank or someth--”
Suddenly Grotto screamed, and Snooze shirked back. A column of energy erupted from the orb of light, shooting out into the depths of the void. Then, from its depths, tendrils of slime-and-light burst forth, striking down at Grotto and enveloping the QUACK in its grasp. Snooze dropped Odd from her palm, moving forward and summoning Fire. She hurled a large ball of flame at the thing, but the moment it struck, the fire extinguished with a puff of smoke.
“Grotto!” Snooze yelled, as her mentor became completely encased in the grotesque appendages. Before she could do anything else, the tendrils receded, dragging its quarry into the light they’d emerged from. With a loud pop, the column of light disappeared, leaving only the shimmering orb.
Snooze reached out to it, intending… what, she didn’t know. But as her fingertips grazed its surface, the orb shook and then shot off like a rocket, into the void, faster than could be believed. Then it was gone.
“Grotto!” Snooze called, trying desperately to find any indication of the direction the Seed of Light had gone.
“IT WAS A TRICK!” Odd screamed out, sounding angry. “I’ll stop it!”
The tiny Archangel suddenly lept into the air and fell dramatically back onto the black earth with a sigh and a groan of pain.
“Grotto…” Snooze whispered sadly.
It had all happened so fast, she hadn’t had time to do much other than hurl Fire at it, but that hadn’t affected it at all. Whatever it had been, it was supposed to take her, she was sure of that much. Someone had wanted to get her to use it, and then take her.
Snooze’s brows knit into a deep and angry scowl.
“What do we do?!” Odd exclaimed, sounding fearful.
“Odd,” Snooze said cooly, her voice flat and severe.
“...yes?” the creature asked tentatively.
“Go get Meat,” she commanded. “We are going to get our QUACK back.”