“Why?”
“Excuse me?” Xolt asked.
“Why do I have to stay in this form?”
“A-as I said,” Xolt began, seemingly uncomfortable beyond reasonable belief, “we need you to--”
“So you need me to,” Snooze said, clarifying, “but do I have to?”
Xolt didn’t say anything for a while, he just stood, looking to the side as if trying to decide how best to proceed. A few times he made a noise as if he was preparing to respond, but then seemed to find it was a bad idea. More than anything, Snooze assumed he was likely having an argument with himself. While she waited, she noticed the uncomfortable smell had appeared again, this time lingering. It wasn’t extremely unpleasant, only mildly so. It was familiar, yet...
“We want to see how this plays out,” Xolt finally said. “Get to the bottom of this unique situation, you know? We have never encountered an opportunity like this, and to have a celestial in a capacity to control the outcome… well, that just wouldn’t be suitable in an environment such as this. There are too many variables… and a god of your level shouldn’t be burdened with that much responsibility.”
“I see,” Snooze said carefully. She, in fact, did not see, though, on this particular account, it wasn’t any lack of capacity to understand on her part. No, it was a much more base reason. Snooze thought something was amiss. Something she wasn’t being told. But, in consequently humble fashion, she needed more information.
“So someone… like me, would be unable to navigate such a sticky situation? Is that what you’re saying?” She asked.
“Well, er… yes, I suppose that is what I am getting at,” Xolt said, though to Snooze, it seemed as though her words had given him an “out” from an otherwise more uncomfortable conversation.
Pursue this.
The usual voice in her head--her own thoughts and whims, seemed odd. It was almost as if she hadn’t thought that, but something else had perhaps given her that notion. However, rather than confuse herself further, she decided it was of the utmost importance to continue speaking with Xolt.
“Well, if I may,” Snooze started, moving around the counter to address Xolt more closely. “It seems as though if it is a unique and unheard of situation, then perhaps it’s worth looking into more. Would it be fair to say that we don’t know for sure what the outcome would be if I were to stay? The same could also be said for if I was to return to my plane, right?”
“Yes, that’s fair,” Xolt said, “but it would also create an unfair set of principles for the life that currently dwells here.”
“How so?”
“Well, think about it, Snooze,” Xolt said, “for as long as these forms of life have existed here, they’ve been directionless, and without the influence of a ruling celestial being to interfere in growth. I would be grateful if you’d keep in mind that you’ve been undeclared for their entire manifestation. So, suddenly introducing this new element would be the equivalent of thrusting a aquisileckta out of their cabeabatar nest.”
Snooze blinked.
“Ah, yes, I am sorry,” Xolt said, “old habits from an even older world. To clarify; having that level of change would modify the lifeforms’ existence abruptly and drastically. They may not survive.”
Snooze leaned against the front side of the desk and crossed her arms. She contemplated Xolt’s words very carefully. Something itched at the back of her mind, and she was sure that there was something more to all of this than what she had been told. The book she’d been reading when Xolt arrived had depicted the fight with Perth at the seaside, though she had been strangely absent from the depiction. She did not trust this Xolt for a second. Perhaps it was her innate distrust of systems of governing bodies based on hierarchies and demands, or maybe it was simply that Xolt reminded her of one of the hand-wringing know-it-alls at the transportation office, but she was on her guard.
She decided then to take a calculated risk.
“I’m sorry,” she said, placing a hand on her head, “I have been a bit short during this whole interaction. I’ve just been feeling so weak, and well… I mean, obviously you know why…”
Xolt nodded, blissfully unaware that Snooze did not in fact have any idea as to why she would still be feeling so weakened.
“Yes, I imagine that could be sort of jarring,” Xolt said. “But the process was gradual, you just happened to sleep through it, so it may still be a shock. But don’t be embarrassed, it happens to all of us… well, perhaps not to this magnitude, but it still happens.”
I’m getting somewhere with this gamble, but I don’t really know where.
“Wait, it even happens to you?” Snooze said, “But you’re a much higher level than I am. Shouldn’t you be immune?”
Snooze had the feeling as though stroking the celestial ego of a bureaucrat was a good way to get them to spill the beans.
Xolt smiled wide, obviously pleased by her compliment.
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“Well, I will admit, it hasn’t happened in a long time, but that is wonderfully unimportant. Losing Followers is a natural part of a celestial existence, and it will be repaired in time. Though, you’ll have to look forward to hard work on your part since it’s more difficult to start from square one again.”
My followers! Snooze thought, of course! It’s been years, apparently. Anyone who would have worshipped me would have died out by now, and if my own life was any sort of indicator, a lot of those familial beliefs die out after a generation or two.
She had tricked Xolt into showing their hand, and felt a little accomplished--though, she wasn’t done. She had another question to ask.
“I see,” Snooze said, feigning a bit of what she hoped looked like hopeful determination. “I suppose I will just have to do my best to find a way to reintroduce myself to the denizens. I only wish I had access to the Book of Leaf, but I mean, obviously… it’s so far away?”
She felt less confident about this go around. She was never one for deception. What she wouldn’t give to have Riff’s help right now.
Xolt’s narrowed their dog brows.
“That’s a curious thing to say, Snooze.”
Snooze chuckled nervously, feeling as though the bottom had fallen off the building.
“Is it?” she asked, “I was just making conversation.”
“An odd point to touch upon, I would be inclined to mention,” Xolt said, the expression on the dog’s face never changing from its suspicion. Snooze too, began to become suspicious, and even a bit nervous. She did not appreciate the glare that was starting to form in the twinkle of Xolt’s eye, and even worse was that constant stench of--
Sulfur!
Snooze knew it was a familiar scent. She thought briefly as to the awful storm that had scattered sulfur all those thousands of years ago on her planet, and she knew there were only a few spots where they’d likely still remain on her world. She figured she’d been moved after her slip into slumber, though how and why, she didn’t know. She didn’t imagine she’d have been taken across any particularly wide stretches of water as it didn’t seem practical, so in all likelihood, she was still on the same continent she’d been on when she dramatically fainted. That left a very narrow selection of locations that the Village of Gens could be found from her old-world frame of reference, and it was a start. Something close to a plan had been brewing inside her mind, and now a few of the smaller features were beginning to tie together into a marvelously auspicious tapestry of her own divining.
“In any case, Snooze,” Xolt said, “it is with great regret that I must inform you that our time together here is fleeting. I have an infinitely unyielding schedule to adhere to, and I do not wish to be late. So, I’ll lay it all out for you. If you choose to remain here, in your current form and allow the… Upper Echelon to see how this plays out, we can ensure that you will be bequeathed an additional Archangel to confer with. We will also give you access to another reference tool, not dissimilar from your own Book of Leaf, for access at your convenience. Finally, we will give you something most valuable… we will return to you the use of your Elemental Earth Curio.”
Xolt smiled at that last part, yes, inside the head of the dog was a celestial brain that was positively gloating as to the wonderfully crafted and well-thought out visceral snare of logic that had bubbled out of it and forged this uniquely unassailable deal. Xolt knew that with the agreement struck today with Snooze, the Powers That Be would be quite overjoyed, perhaps even... jubilant? Though, knowing the temperament they were typically prone to, that seemed unlikely, but maybe they’d inject a bit of good cheer into the tones of their voiceless voices?
“I see,” Snooze said, standing up straight.
She had to admit that being able to control Earth again was a novel idea, though it felt a bit… cheap to her and would feel like something of a loophole. She’d sacrificed the element in order to save her friend, and to reacquire the use of the thing would mean she’d be required to make another--possibly more unsettling--sacrifice. Didn’t the use of her Godspells require a degree of Followers within the confines of her world? Wasn’t that the danger of staying behind? What good would it be to have access to a former ally if she wouldn’t be able to utilize it?
No, stick to the plan. It’s a good plan. It was sincerely bothersome how unlike herself her own inner monologue sounded.
There are times in a life--yes, even in godly life, even in humble godly life, where uncomfortable situations are presented. But, to be humble is not to be demure in the face of adversity. No, instead, to be truly humble, one must eschew that which causes a person--or celestial being-- to react to their ego. A truly humble person, when tested, may not “grin and bear it,” as it were, but instead, fight back against the forces which demand to steamroll them and do what they think is most proper. Not because of pride, but because their worth is that much more important than what is being asked of them. Being humble is not a weakness, and those who might design to misunderstand as such should not confuse it with a lack of worth.
You cannot be humble without understanding your own value.
Snooze found Xolt’s request to be… odd. It didn’t make sense to her, nor did it seem kind. One thing a humble god cannot abide is a particularly unhealthy lack of kindness.
“How about no?” Snooze said.
Xolt had been smiling, eyes closed, ready to accept the resignation of the one called Snooze, and this new input was so surprising that the dog in a hat’s eyes shot open, almost bulging clear out of the canine skull, and the being began to quiver.
“W-what?” Xolt asked. Infinite dread had begun to set into the god’s very essence. It was not a feeling that Xolt found particularly comforting.
“I said, no,” Snooze said again, and then pointed a finger at the dog, who cowered back.
“No, no, no, no.” With each soft, musical uttering of the words, Snooze bounced her little Stonie-inspired finger around as if conducting an orchestral ensemble. To Xolt, it was infuriating.
“What do you mean, ‘no?!’” Xolt demanded, still unmoving from the protective position they’d taken in the center of the guild hall. “I’ve been more than generous in what I have offered, and you have no other choice. You won’t be able to return to your plane on your own, so why don’t you just think about it for a moment and calm down, and we can look at this rationally.”
Snooze squared her shoulders and lowered her brows in a shape that was truly unique to her face in this form. It was the deepest of scowls, and she was aiming all of its scrunched-up fury at Xolt. The doggod took a tentative step backward, trying desperately to smile, but failing to look like anything other than a half-happy, half-terrified gremlin.
“Alright, alright,” Xolt said quickly, puppy dog eyes darting around the room nervously, “how about if I ask the Upper Crust to throw in a little more? Wouldn’t that be amenable?”
Snooze felt a familiar sensation that blossomed from within her and began coursing along her body, radiating from her like a shimmering beam of gamma energy. She’d not even attempted to summon it, but in that moment of unbridled annoyance, she had done so anyway, and it had a curious amendment to its usual effect.
The waves of magical light washed over the floor, billowing out from Snooze’s tiny avatar, and spilled over Xolt’s quivering mass, and as it touched the dog in the hat, Snooze stood up as tall as she could, the irritation melting away from her visage, and suddenly, she was the picture of perfect zen-like calm. With hardly any emphasis or emotion in her voice, Snooze parted her lips.
“Go.”
It was as soft as words come, but the power behind the utterance was so great, that to Xolt it was as though a shockwave exploded. Ripples of force cascaded over the dog in the hat and Xolt was forced to back away, unable to withstand the immensity of the command that had seeped deep into every fiber in the being’s body. Xolt felt the puppy paws shift, and almost immediately, the dog in the hat had put the paw-tel to the metal, and was gone from the guild hall in a flash.
Oh, I’m sorry, are puns not allowed? Well, guess where an individual’s contempt for puns can be rammed…?
Nevermind, back to Snooze.
Snooze breathed a heavy sigh of relief as the insufferable dolt named Xolt made an expedient bolt from her presence. (Take that!) The ominous-yet-pathetic sound of ‘you’ll regret this!’ echoing from beyond the doorway, while at the same time, the world seemed to return to normal. The flying creature continued on past the window, the hum and drum of the village returned, and not too distantly, Snooze heard the sound of a heavy object hitting the dirt with an anguished, ‘oof!’
She turned around quickly. She knew she had to move fast, but the next phase of her plan was moving along, and she needed it to go smoothly. Without a further thought, she snatched Mediator Viz’s book from the counter, and raced out of the door herself.
I have to find Hal, she thought. She’ll be my best bet for this next part.
----
With a quiet patter, Mediator Viz emerged from the back room, two heaping plates of some delicious-looking, cake-like baked goods in her hands.
“I thought you’d like to try this since there’s plenty to go around! And don’t worry, it’s on the h-- oh.”
Viz looked around the empty chamber, and slowly set the plates down with a quiet clatter. Her head drooped a little as she stared out at the open doorway into the village, then let out a big sigh.
“Oh well, I suppose I did take two minutes,” she admitted, “and some people aren’t willing to wait around for something like that. I hope she didn’t think I abandoned her?”
Mediator Viz shrugged.
“Oh well, back to my book, and the--”
She saw that in addition to the woman, her tome now also seemed to be missing. Viz’s eyes grew wide and she scowled.
“NO!” she bellowed, “MY SPELL WAS IN THERE! THIEF!"
"THIEEEEEEEEEEF!”