Fire crackled on charred logs.
The day had turned to night, revealing a twinkling sky full of stars. Just after creation, Snooze had placed them--thousands in fact--at varying distances away from the planet using her scale model and her Curio-know-how. Now, in the hollow of the clearing beneath the boughs of the branches of the beautificus arborus, Snooze and Riff sat in front of a campfire enjoying those same distant sparkles, discussing the finer points of godhood.
“So, that’s the long and short of it,” Snooze said, leaning back to rest against the trunk of the tree. She’d recounted everything from her beginnings, to the creation of her first stretch of land, to choosing to split the difference between Meat’s Seed of Life and the Earth element, and ending just before she stumbled onto Riff in the forest. Everything.
She’d even labored over her feelings as she watched the world grow from her celestial pocket dimension, unknowingly within reach of visiting at any moment until now.
“That’s truly remarkable,” Riff said, smiling a bit more now that she was armed with new information.
“It has been a long journey, but I’m still learning,” Snooze said, bouncing from side to side where she sat. Then she prodded the smoldering wooden stakes that they’d stuck into the soft earth, slowly roasting them over the flames. There were two, one for Snooze, and one for Riff. Skewered on each was a delectable row of goodies. Those took the form of several edible items they’d gathered for their dinner. Fashioned in a kabob-style organization were four plump brown mushrooms, six smaller-sized green potatoes shorn of skin and growth, and two wild gray onions. Their scavenged dinner magically rotated over the fire, each slathered in oil from the indigo bush and seasoned with peppergrass. Snooze knew the taste would be outstanding--if she said so herself, and couldn’t wait to share the meal with her new friend and fellow god.
It is important to note that plantlife, while remarkably different on this planet, was still moderately similar in many ways to Snooze's old world. This was because of the way in which she had designed her world, and its vaguest simuacrum to that little blue marble so desperately out of the stretch of the vast majority of its universe. The potatoes may have been green, but they more or less tasted like potatoes.
“We should always seek to better our understanding,” Riff agreed and eyed the food, licking her lips, “...how much longer on those?”
“Oh, I’d say they’re just about done!” Snooze announced and pulled the pokers out of the ground. She raised her hand in the air and summoned a pleasant breeze, cooling the piping hot fungus and vegetables with the gentle wind. She smiled, handing one skewer to Riff and keeping the other for herself.
Riff took a careful bite of the onion and it crunched beneath her shadowy… teeth? It wasn’t obvious what she had going for her inside her mouth, but whatever it was, it seemed to do the job well enough. Her eyes widened.
“Snooze…” she said, staring at her companion, “this is amazing!”
“I’m so happy you like it!” Snooze declared, munching happily at her own morsels.
“It’s more than like,” Riff breathed, taking a few more bites of the skewered onion, “I think I’m in love with it. I want to marry this meal and raise a family with it.”
“Well, it looks like you’re about to be a widow,” Snooze chuckled, pointing to the stick in the other god’s shadowy grasp.
Riff looked down. She’d devoured almost all of it.
“How did you learn to cook like this?” Riff asked, scarfing down the last few remaining bits of mushroom.
“Well, the minute I gained a mouth, I decided I wanted to taste flavors again,” she explained in between bites, “and so I started learning how to make delicious food in case it ever came in handy.”
“Well, my most sincere compliments to the chef,” Riff said, picking the skewer clean and tossing it into the flames of the campfire.
Snooze blushed.
“It was nothing,” she said, and then pressed a finger to her chin thoughtfully, “though, I will say that having to quiet a hungry stomach makes the food taste that much more stupendous.”
“Lucky,” Riff said, “I’m here in my Astral form, so while I can definitely taste the food, I don’t need it for sustenance.”
“Astral form?” Snooze asked, finishing the last of her meal as well and discarding the stick into the fire next to her companion’s. “What’s that?”
“Oh!” Riff said, and held up a finger, “now I get to teach you something.”
Snooze nodded.
“Please!” she said, scooting closer to Riff, “tell me everything you know.”
It was true that there was much Snooze had yet to learn about the nature of being a god, though, to her credit, she’d asked plenty of questions. Unfortunately for her, she’d been assigned the Book of Leaf for her god life counterpart, and as such, would have to endure quite a lot of figuring out how things worked on her own. This was actually something Snooze excelled at, and though it would never admit it to her, The Book of Leaf loved self starters.
“My Astral form is a Path-specific feature that allows me to travel to other planets or universes.”
“Ooooh,” Snooze exclaimed, smiling wide, “so that’s how you were able to get here.”
“Exactly,” Riff said, crossing her arms and sinking back with pride, “it’s a real hoot.”
“So, if it’s Path-specific, does that mean I won’t be able to obtain an Astral form?”
Riff shrugged.
“That depends entirely on your Path,” she said, “what is yours?”
“Oh, um, I dunno,” Snooze admitted sheepishly.
It was Humble, for those that might not have been paying attention. However, Snooze, who also had not been paying attention, was still in the dark.
Riff gave her a funny look.
“You don’t know your own God Path?”
“Well, I’m sure that I do… ” Snooze said, closing her eyes and drumming her finger tips against her chin, her brows furrowed in concentration.
“You’re an interesting sort, Snooze,” Riff chuckled.
“Well, what’s yours?” Snooze asked, “maybe if you say it, I’ll remember mine?”
Riff nodded.
“Sure,” she said, “mine is ‘Measured.’ It’s characterized by those that take a calm, rational approach to their tasks and endeavors.”
“Hm,” Snooze said thoughtfully, “I don’t think that’s mine. Could you name some others?”
“Sure,” Riff said, leaning back and producing the digits of her hand, counting them out as she listed the different names.
“Let’s see… There’s Measured—which I explained, then there is Wild, which is the opposite. Those people are erratic and willful. There’s Apathetic, for that hands-off approach, and there’s Ambitious, for the gods that need to fine tune to their heart’s content. Next is Craven, then Confident, Melancholy, then Jubilant, Virtuous, and of course there’s Pompous… a truly unfortunate Path, if it’s to be believed. Finally, there’s Humble.”
“Saving the best for last, eh?” Snooze asked with a wink, “that one is me. Humble.” But, what special Feat had she received? She tried desperately to scour the annals of her brain for the answer, but she feared she’d been relying on the Book of Leaf for far too long. She’d always used its informational display to get the answer to any questions she’d ever had. This had made Snooze hopelessly dependent on her companion, but also wildly easy pickings during team trivia night. Regardless, no matter how hard she thought, she couldn’t summon any recollection of her acquired attributes.
Riff laughed.
“Yeah, Humble checks out. You’re as sweet as a sugar glaze.”
Snooze beamed.
“Thank you!”
“No, thank you,” Riff returned, settling against the tree trunk behind her and smiling, “all the gods I’ve met until now have been… hard to interact with. You’re the first one that hasn’t tried to banish me from their world.”
“Well, why would I do that?” Snooze asked, “you’re perfectly good company.”
“Well, yours is a minority opinion.”
“Wait,” Snooze said, staring at Riff, “you’ve met other gods? How many?”
“Well, let’s see…” Riff began, doing a mental calculation, before finally, “eight.”
“...and all of them tried to banish you?”
“Yeah,” Riff stated, scowling, “that’s a lesson for you as well: not every god is friendly. Some are downright dirtbags. They’ll be nice to your face and then stab you through your back and into your spleen. Be very wary of any other gods you encounter, Snooze.”
This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.
“I’ll be sure to keep that in mind,” Snooze said, then a thought came to her.
“Riff, how did you know that Meat--er, my Archangel was alive?”
Riff had her eyes closed and her arms crossed behind her head as she relaxed and nodded curtly. Snooze could tell that there was something painful associated with this topic.
“It was what I asked for,” Riff answered somberly, slowly opening her eyes, “in my Astral form. I asked to be sent to a world that still had use of an Archangel, and here I landed.”
Snooze was amazed. With her eyes wide and sparkling, she scooted even closer to Riff to examine her shadowy form, as though she believed she’d be able to glean some method of obtaining this same skill for herself.
“That’s stupendous!” Snooze exclaimed, “you can just command your form to take you somewhere, and it does it?! That’s A-PLUS-Level god spellery.”
Riff nodded. “I suppose so,” then, her eyes flashed, and a mischievous grin appeared on her face.
“Hey, Snooze,” she said urgently, “what’s something you want really bad?”
“Oh, I dunno,” she said shrugging, “why?”
“Because, silly, I’m going to go retrieve it for you,” Riff said, “Come on, what do you want… like, more than anything in the whole, wide Multiverse?”
Snooze paused. Not only because it was a perplexing question with a complex answer, but she also needed a moment because she’d been referring to it as the Manyverse. She had to admit, Multiverse had a better ring to it, and seemed to flow off the tongue better. But she dismissed those thoughts for a moment and imagined what she wanted more than anything.
Several images bubbled up from the gummy thoughtswamp of her murky memories. She remembered being four years old, riding down the sidewalk in her old neighborhood on a bicycle with training wheels. She had a little yellow helmet on, and she had been wearing a pink dress covered in carnations.
A bike could be fun…
Then she remembered a few years later when the training wheels came off, flying down a hill at top speed and unable to stop as she screeched in fear before colliding with a FOR SALE sign in a yard, jettisoning off the seat and into a prickly rose bush.
Nevermind that.
She thought of something else. A large, refrigerated machine full of blinking lights and a full-length advertisement of a pineapple soda on it. A myriad of colors met her gaze--colors that were not usually found in nature so you knew they’d be tasty. She zeroed in on a bright blue and electric green wrapper that held (in her mind) the ambrosia of the gods…
She smiled at Riff.
“A Ten-Held-High Fukusu no zasho Chocolate Bar!”
Riff blinked at her, and then smiled again.
“You got it, Snooze!” she declared, lifting a single finger straight up, “comin’ right up. Summoning Tome!”
Suddenly, a small obsidian badge flickered into existence in front of the shadowy god. It had the delicate structure of a finely-crafted gem and had been forged into the shape of a little black cloud.
“What is that?!” Snooze demanded, half startled, half excited.
“Oh, this is my Tome of Smoke,” she said simply, “do you not have one?”
The term Tome of Smoke didn’t register with Snooze, but she wasn’t entirely without her capabilities. It had a similar naming convention to her own Book of Leaf. It didn’t escape her that there must have been similar god life companions out there, though she’d have been ready to admit she hadn’t really given it much consideration. What reason would she have to assume that there was anything other than the Book of Leaf?
What Snooze did not know then, was that while the Book of Leaf had been chosen as a god life companion to others before, it wasn’t exactly frequent. No, the Book of Leaf would be considered quite an uncommon godfellow indeed.
However, if the Book of Leaf was considered infrequent, well that would make the Tome of Smoke exceedingly rare.
If she’d known that, Snooze would likely have been more impressed than she already was. Perhaps even a little wary. It was a jewel that caught the eye in such a way as to draw the viewer in. Not only was it deep in its void-like charm, but it was the blackest-black that could possibly be reached in hue. It was thirty-five degrees darker than Vantablack, and was imperceptible to anyone other than celestial beings, absorbing one hundred percent of visible light. If an eye (connected to an organic brain) fell onto such a color, the person would be driven either mad or catatonic staring into its unending depths.
Coming to her senses, Snooze blinked a few times, retracing the flow of conversation that had led to this point.
“Oh,” she responded finally, “I don’t have that, I have the Book of Leaf. But I can’t summon it.”
“Are you sure?” Riff asked, pinching the Tome of Smoke gem between her shadowy fingers, “have you ever tried?”
Snooze hadn’t, though she’d also never been given a reason to.
“Summon… the Book of Leaf…?” she lilted.
POP!
An emerald jewel appeared in the air, hewn into the shape of a leaf.
“I DID IT!” Snooze exclaimed.
“Yeah you did!” Riff encouraged, her smile as wide as could be. She nodded.
“Right,” she said, standing, “I’ll go grab the Ten-Held-High Fukusu no zasho Chocolate Bar, while you fiddle around with your new friend.”
With a loud snap, Riff suddenly disappeared into thin air. The area she’d just occupied felt heavy and almost electric to Snooze, as though static had been poured right into the spot.
Snooze looked around. All was quiet. Carefully, she prodded the floating green leaf gem. A display sprang up in front of her and the god recognized the text immediately.
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HELLO SNOOZE! I SEE YOU’VE DISCOVERED THE USE OF YOUR BOOK OF LEAF: TRAVEL EDITION.
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“Uh, yeah…” she said. The tone the text relayed seemed to be almost… at ease. Snooze wasn’t sure she was prepared for a laid-back version of the informational super system.
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EXCELLENT! I AM A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT MANIFESTATION OF THE BOOK YOU'VE COME TO KNOW AND LOVE SO WELL.
I CAN PROVIDE YOU WITH A VARIETY OF INTRA AND EXTRAPLANAR INFORMATION DURING YOUR SABBATICAL, INCLUDING SOPHISTICATED DESCRIPTIONS OF LIFEFORMS, A VARIETY OF NATURAL REMEDIES, AND PROVIDE CONSEQUENTIAL COMIC RELIEF THROUGH JOKES.
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“You know jokes?” Snooze asked. Truly, this version of the Book knew how to party a bit more.
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YES, FOR INSTANCE: WHAT IS A WOLF’S FAVORITE TIME OF YEAR…?
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Snooze smiled wide.
“Uh… Fangsgiving?” Snooze offered.
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THAT’S GOOD! I WILL ADD THAT TO MY LITANY OF POSSIBLE ANSWERS. OTHER ANSWERS INCLUDE: THE HOWLIDAYS, HOWLOWEEN, MARDI GROWL, AND ST. PACK-TREKS DAY.
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Snooze frowned.
“Well, I guess those are good, but seeing them all at once kind of ruins the funnies, dontcha think? It’s not really tickling my funny bone.”
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I SEE. PERHAPS YOU WOULD PREFER A MORE ABSURD STYLE OF COMEDY?
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“Okay,” Snooze said. So far, she was missing her Book.
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WHAT IS A WOLF’S FAVORITE TIME OF YEAR?
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“Uh, I dunno.” Snooze answered.
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A BETTER QUESTION IS, WHY ARE YOU IN MY HOUSE, AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY PRINTER?!
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Snooze smiled.
“That’s better, I suppose.” She said, “But Book… that’s not why I summoned you.”
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MY APOLOGIES, SOMETIMES I JUST GET CARRIED AWAY. WHAT CAN I HELP YOU WITH, SNOOZE?
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Snooze nodded.
“Can you tell me what my God Path Feature is?”
A list began to populate for her, and laid out all of her currently acquired statistics.
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[ SNOOZE - LEVEL 5 GOD ]
GODSPELLS
AIR [ LEVEL 7 ] 8 % TO LEVEL 8
WATER [ LEVEL 6 ] 91 % TO LEVEL 7
FIRE [ LEVEL 6 ] 89 % TO LEVEL 7
WEATHER [ LEVEL 5 ] 69 % TO LEVEL 6
PLANTLIFE [ LEVEL 5 ] 52 % TO LEVEL 6
FUNGUS [ LEVEL 5 ] 51 % TO LEVEL 6
LIGHTNING [ LEVEL 3 ] 77 % TO LEVEL 4
GRAVITY [ LEVEL 3 ] 50 % TO LEVEL 4
LIGHT [ LEVEL 3 ] 35 % TO LEVEL 4
LIFE [ LEVEL 3 ] 12 % TO LEVEL 4
DARKNESS [ LEVEL 3 ] 9 % TO LEVEL 4
ORE [ LEVEL 3 ] 3 % TO LEVEL 4
DEATH [ LEVEL 1 ] .020 % TO LEVEL 2
OTHER ABILITIES
OMNITUENS [ LEVEL 9 ] 80 % TO LEVEL 10
RITUAL COMMAND [ LEVEL 9 ] 18 % TO LEVEL 10
SHAPE CHANGE [ LEVEL 8 ] 85% TO LEVEL 9
DIVINE INTERVENTION [ LEVEL 6 ] 85% TO LEVEL 7
ELEMENT-SMITH [ LEVEL 6 ] 32 % TO LEVEL 7
PERMEABILITY [ LEVEL 4 ] 78 % TO LEVEL 5
AVATAR [ LEVEL 1 ] 10 % TO LEVEL 2
AURA• [ LEVEL 1 ] .712 % TO LEVEL 2
ARCHANGELS [ 1 ]
FOLLOWERS [ 131 ]
GOD PATH
HUMBLE
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To Snooze, seeing everything laid out before here like that was a swift smack of pride. She’d grown so much without even realizing it. She saw her God Path at the bottom, and pointed at it.
“Can you expand that section?”
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ABSOLUTELY!
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The display opened up further, allowing Snooze to glimpse further into her own nature.
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GOD PATH HUMBLE
YOU HAVE BEGUN A JOURNEY THAT FAVORS THAT OF HUMILITY AND PATIENCE. GOD PATH HUMBLE SPECIFIES THAT A LIFE WORTH LIVING IS WORTH LIVING WITHOUT WANT FOR PRAISE, RENOWN, OR BRAGGADOCIOUS DEEDS.
WITH THE HUMBLE PATH, THE ACTIONS YOU TAKE WILL RESONATE IN SPECIFIC AND SOMETIMES UNEXPECTED WAYS.
YOU HAVE [ 1 / ??? ] ABILITIES GAINED THROUGH THIS PATH: AURA.
YOU CAN SEND A CALMING VIBE OUT FROM YOUR BODY. YOU MAY USE THIS TO ATTEMPT TO PLACATE OR GIVE OFF AN AIR OF TRUSTWORTHINESS. HOWEVER, YOUR ABILITY IS LIKE A MUSCLE AND THE MORE YOU USE IT, THE STRONGER IT WILL BECOME.
[ OTHER PATHS ]
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“Hm,” Snooze said, “so my God Path gives me an Aura…”
She assumed that the question marks meant to indicate an unknown number of additional abilities she could receive in the future.
However, Aura didn’t seem as cool or useful as an Astral form. Perhaps she’d gain something like that later on? She didn’t know what level Riff was, so perhaps she could do a number of other things that she'd not shown off?
She tabled that for now. Instead, she specified to the Book of Leaf: Travel Edition that she’d like more information on the other Paths.
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A GOD MAY CHANGE THEIR PATH OVER THE COURSE OF THEIR TENURED ETERNITY.
CERTAIN ACTIONS WILL FACILITATE AN ALIGNMENT SWITCH, SO IT IS IMPERATIVE FOR GODS TO CHOOSE THEIR WORDS AND ACTIONS CAREFULLY.
BUT IT IS NOT EASY TO DO, MOMENTS THAT DEFINE A PATH ARE NOT MUNDANE ACTS.
BELOW IS A LIST OF OTHER PATHS.
•HUMBLE•
POMPOUS
CRAVEN
CONFIDENT
MELANCHOLY
JUBILANT
MEASURED
WILD
APATHETIC
AMBITIOUS
VIRTUOUS
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Suddenly, there was another rumble beneath Snooze’s feet, and she could hear something that sounded like voices approaching swiftly from behind the trees. What is that thunderous noise I keep hearing? She bolted upright.
After a moment, two shapes darted out of the copse, their eyes wide and their movements urgent. They seemed to be a male and a female Stonie, both still young—perhaps in their late teens.
It wasn’t until they got closer that Snooze recognized them. The female was dressed in a plain wool smock, her dark hair long and loose, her forehead dotted with scars. Snooze knew her as Pili, the daughter of the Dela People’s Chieftain. The male was Anik, and he had his pale hair cut into a feathery Mohawk and wore rough-spun wool, dyed green with a white stripe painted on it. It was the symbol of the Temple of Sengak—her primary followers in this part of the world.
She thought about hiding, but they noticed her too quickly, so she strode toward them, her hands out. The two primitive creatures froze in their tracks, dried trails of tears staining their cheeks. Bruises peppered their skin and cuts of some manner criss crossed their bodies. We’re this the old world, and not a Stone Age paradise, Snooze would have suggested that they’d just been in a car accident.
“Woah there!” Snooze exclaimed in Pebbletongue (a name she’d invented,) “where are you two running to?”
They stammered as they spoke, their words cascading out of them, grateful to have found someone, it seemed. Their language had developed over time, but was still in an infancy, typified by short, direct sentences free of frills.
“We must run!” Pili declared, grasping the hem of Snooze’s grass frock.
“We were attacked!” Anik said, his voice hoarse.
“Attacked? By whom?”
An army? No, that made no sense. War was not a concept that had appeared in her world. Nor were the people organized in such a way to turn to combat. No, this had to be something else. There were many predators that could have done it. Though, that too seemed strange as most avoided the Stonies.
“A great evil,” Pili managed, tears welling up in her eyes, “a darkness creature lay waste to the village!”
A darkness creature? Snooze could think of a few nocturnal beasts that might fit that bill. Zoprockets. Reticulating Damphir. Steves.
“How long ago?” Snooze demanded and mentally prepared her Ritual Command. She’d find whatever monster had done this foul deed and resolve this issue.
“Hours ago,” Anik stayed, his lips trembling,”before the setting sun. We crawled out from the rubble not long ago. It razed the whole village. So much fire and anger. It was some sort of shadow, like nothing seen before.”
Shadow? Oh.
Before Snooze could gather her thoughts any further, she caught a glimpse of the Book of Leafs display, still open before her. An additional item was at the bottom of the list, rounding it out to form an even twelve. Or, six pairings each.
A God Path that Riff had failed to mention.
She stared at the name of the final Path and felt a sinking stab in her chest.
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VILE
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