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Quests of the Wanderer
Chapter 29. Urmas, The Great...

Chapter 29. Urmas, The Great...

"Hahaha, you're lucky that I'm free today and don't mind chatting with you while putting some common sense in your little empty head. Let's start with a bit of info about your current situation, Cough..." The dwarf bandit cleared his throat and continued.

"Congratulations, Boyo, you've fallen into the hands of a super elite bandit, who is famous for killing his opponents brutally and eating their heads, after which..." The dwarf bandit paused, moving his face close to Ash's ear, he whispered. "This is all part of a ritual that increases my strength, nothing personal, I'm not a psychopath."

After correcting the misunderstanding to Ash, who was giving him a horrified look as soon as he mentioned eating the heads of his victims as if he had seen a ghost, and continued with a proud looks on his face, back straightened and head held high.

"The one and only Mountain Bandit Kind, The Head Hunter, The Lover (Raper) of a Hundred Women/Girls, The Most Talented Treasure Seeker, Urmas, the Great, Mwahahaha..."

"Now, you dirty slave, tremble under my feet and beg like a b*tch. Maybe I'll let go of your head and generously spare your pitiful life, only to sell you to a slave trader to earn a hefty sum of money from them. Young boys like you are very popular in the market nowadays; those crazy b*tches from rich families wouldn't even blink to empty their pockets to get you under their wet cunts."

The dwarf Bendit suddenly became emotional and spoke with a tone full of longing and regret. "Sigh, if I had a face like yours, I wouldn't hesitate to hand myself over to a beautiful rich woman. Such a simple life; just eating delicious dishes, f*cking a beautiful bombshell b*tch day and night till she begs to let go, and sleeping comfortably on a warm bed holding her soft body in arms, ahh, such a wonderful life. No need to worry about anything... Mother was right, this world is all about having a beautiful face..."

Ash, who was very self-aware of his own handsomeness, could only roll his eyes with disdain. How could there be such a magical thing in the world? He had read and seen enough dark things in his past life on the treasure trove of the internet to know what kind of women would buy sex slaves to satisfy their hunger. Only those who enjoy torturing their men during intimacy or are too ugly, fat, or smelly would do such a thing. Beautiful, elegant, kind, prideful, and a bit arrogant tsundere-type women/girls didn't need those filthy slaves for themselves; they always had a lot of suitors who were willing to do anything just to speak a few words with them.

According to Ahs either this bastard dwarf was messing with him, so he, a naive, stupid guy, could be fooled by him and follow his instruction honestly until he met his doom, or he himself was living in a dream, and reality wasn't free enough to give him a proper slap to wake up.

"To tell the truth, my luck is not as bad as I had thought. Just when I was thinking I lost my prey last night because of that damn ugly monster and had to go back empty-handed, you come knocking on my door, giving me such a great surprise. Now finally, I will be able to buy my second axe and try to get the title of "Double Axe Mad Bull" from Obadolius. That bastard always teases me, saying that my titles are very sissy and I should just cut off my dick and change gender so I can match with my titles," The dwarf bandit, Urmas said while gritting his teeth in hatred and slamming his foot hard on the ground.

Second Axe? Where is the first one? Ash, also felt that guy Obadolius's statement is very accurate, especially if the other party is a one-meter-tall dwarf. What mountain bandit king? What Head Hunter?And the lover of a hundred women, My ass! If even one-third of women sat down on him, he might die from simply their weight alone. And does his dick reach long enough to touch a normal human woman's hymen?

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Ash decided to ignore that shameless bastard who was speaking nonsense and scanned him seriously once again. Finally, he saw a dagger-sized axe behind his back, which according to Urmas's height indeed could be called an axe, but from other people's point of view, it resembles more of a child's toy.

...Ah, not this shit again... F*ck! Why is my luck so bad? Wherever I go, there are always people or monsters waiting to kill me. This f*cking doesn't make any sense. It feels like I am playing the game in hell mode. Even novice quests are difficult as hell, with a frighteningly high death rate. God knows how people of this world survive till their thirties. Also, according to common sense from a novel's perspective, doesn't Lady Luck always behave like a cute, newlywed housewife, kind and fully supportive, doting on the MC to death, making their journey smooth sailing, and opportunities fall into their arms like mosquitoes in rainy season? Why am I getting so different treatment? Ash cried out in his heart as his eyes accidentally fell onto Urmas's crotch area again.

"Now, Boyo, if you don't want to feel more pain and die from blood loss, then cover your face. Oh, and tie yourself with this rope as well," Urmas took out an extremely dirty white cloth, which now was everything but white with suspicious yellow stains on it, from behind his back. It smelled so bad that Ash literally vomited his breakfast if his nose wasn't filled with blood. Then Urmas hurriedly ran toward a certain tree with his short legs and brought a thin but quite strong rope, throwing it on Ash's stomach.

"Don't make such a face. You should be thankful that I am giving you clothes. Otherwise, if someone else were in my place, he might not even bother about it and force you on the tip of his sword to move, no matter how much in pain you are. Now hurry up, I will take you to my base, and tomorrow someone will send you to your new home or your new wife. Ahhh, such a lucky bastard are you," Urmas said with a face full of envy and jealousy.

If not for the fact that Ash didn't want to get beaten, he might have already started cursing Urmas's entire family, saying, "Asshole, if you are so interested in being someone's sex toy, then why don't you sell yourself, you little bastard!" Although Ash also knew very well that with Urmas's handsomeness and little brother height, the chance of any human woman, even the ugliest or craziest sex-addicted kind, liking or buying him for pleasure is the same as an honest and innocent man finding a sincere, kind, pure, big-boobed virgin girl in the hentai world: no chance at all.

Unknown to Ash's inner thoughts, Urmas continued with a sinister smile plastered on his face. "By the way, I am in quite a good mood today, so let me give you a kind piece of advice. Although I have already given you a wonderful makeover, if possible, make yourself as much ugly as possible if you don't want to lose your anal virginity." He stared at Ash, seeing him trembling in fear and subconsciously covering his buttocks after hearing his advice, he nodded his head with satisfaction.

"There are some psychopaths in my base who like to play with young boys like you the most, and believe me, you don't want to fall into their hands. Most boys don't end up well. Last time, I accidentally saw them throwing a poor, half-dead child, around 12 or so years old, into the forest early in the morning. Given his condition, it was a pure miracle that he was still breathing, which, of course, only lasted for a few minutes, as wild dogs soon came smelling his blood and ate him alive. His screams were very loud and horrific," Urmas, stop saying that as if remembering that moment. he couldn't help but shiver and quickly shook his head to rid himself of those dangerous memories.