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Quests of the Wanderer
Chapter 15. The Struggle of Newbie World-Traveler

Chapter 15. The Struggle of Newbie World-Traveler

"The farmer is a scary-looking old uncle who has a small house at the entrance. He also had a lot of sheep, cows, and chickens."

Although Ash's stomach gave him a warning to find a toilet as soon as possible, he still managed to hold it back and continue his conversation with James.

"Yes, that is the one. I went to the farm with Grandma many times. Believe me, although that uncle looks scary and doesn't talk nicely, he is a very good man. Every time I went there, he gave me various sweet things to eat, let me play with chickens, etc. Once, he even let me ride his cow. It was a lot of fun," James said with a smile.

Hmm? Seems like that uncle is not a bad person at heart. He just has a dangerous face, a cold personality, and prefers solitude. He is definitely an introverted Tsundere, who doesn't know how to talk with others, it seems trying his job at least once for experience's sake is not a bad idea, After hearing James's words, Ash immediately concluded the farmer's true personality.

"By the way, James," Ash began, embarrassed to ask such a topic of a child who might later spill the beans, "Where do you go to empty your stomach?" Although he knows that asking James about those things carries the risk of becoming a joke, but compared to directly asking Grandma Linda or going into the dangerous forest alone, inquiring about such a matter to an innocent child is still a thousand times better.

"Ohh! Hehehe, you want to do poo-poo? Come with me," James giggled, understanding the natural need, and quickly led Ash to the backside of his house.

Behind Grandma Linda's house stood a small vegetable garden, with various vegetables like cabbage, carrots, potatoes, and pumpkins (half-grown) planted in four neatly square boxes. A small wooden fence protected them from animals and two big barrels around 2 meters tall were placed at the corner of the garden. Surprisingly, in one corner, there was a small square-shaped wooden room resembling a public phone booth, giving Ash an uneasy feeling.

Ash's apprehension soon proved true when James directly took him to a medieval-age toilet and opened the door with a smile. The interior of the toilet was only double the size of a normal phone booth, and there was a small platform of half a meter in height in front. A volleyball-sized hole sat on the platform, probably to avoid seeing some unpleasant things directly.

James walked into the toilet and opened the platform lid in the center where the hole was, there lay a small old-looking wooden basket.

"This is the poor thing in which we dump our poo-poo. Sigh, it has been here for years," James said with mock sentimentality while seeing the old basket which he is using the time he remembers. But he quickly pushed those thoughts out of his head and continued, "Just sit on it, and after finishing, take the basket out, go to the forest, make a hole in a random place, and empty it. But remember to cover the hole back. Because I am too little to go to the forest, Grandma empties it in my turn, but she taught me how in case I need to go outside someday in an emergency.

"Oh, and remember to bring water when you want to use the toilet to clean your ass. The water is in that big barrel you saw at the front of the garden. Also, clean this bucket with water after you finish your job so it doesn't smell. Now, go ahead and 'poo-poo.' I'll wait for you in the house," Giving Ash proper instructions, only a bit inferior to direct demonstration, James, the half-baked life coach, closed the toilet door and ran back to the house merrily, clearly enjoying his part-time guide job.

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"God, what sin have I done to deserve such a horrific punishment? Why have you sent me to such a barbaric world?" Ash cried, his voice choked with emotion, invisible tears welling in his eyes as he gazed at the sky. However, instead of a reply from God, he received a cold warning from his stomach. Steeling himself, Ash bit the bullet and walked toward the large barrel. Beside it lay a 3-liter capacity jar, which he quickly filled. With a heavy heart and an ugly expression, he returned to the medieval-style toilet.

"Will this wooden lid break apart when I sit on it?" Ash wondered with doubt in his mind. He took off his pants slowly, ensuring they wouldn't get dirty, considering he was the only one present and if they got dirty he had to spend the rest of the day in his room. Climbing onto the wooden platform with shaking legs, he adjusted his position on top of the hole. Back on Earth in his previous life, Ash had never used this type of old-fashioned squat toilet seat, which had almost become extinct. Because he was too nervous, he lost his balance, he fell backward like a sumo wrestler.

"Mummy, I want to go back..." A weak cry from a certain world traveler resonated in the small toilet, but sadly no one heard it.

...

"BLARGH!!!"

"Never even in my nightmares, I expected that one day I would have to do such a dirty thing... Blargh..." Ash, who had just disposed of his shit, I mean his poo-poo in a small hole he had dug in the forest behind Linda's house, muttered painfully before vomiting yesterday's food behind a poor bush, the smell was very unpleasant.

"If I continue to vomit at the sight of my own shit, how the f*ck am I going to kill monsters?" Ash slapped himself lightly for encouragement and to dispel nonsense suicidal thoughts coming in his mind while walking back to Linda's house.

"Brother Ash, why did it take you so long? I thought you got kidnapped by goblins. You shouldn't go too far into the forest; it can be very dangerous." James, who was worried about Ash (or perhaps his only playmate and storyteller) who had taken more than an hour just to bury his shit, asked with concern.

"Kiddo, I didn't come to this town out of thin air. I know about those things more clearly than you. Now, hurry up, bring some water, and help me clean my hands. And speaking of needing a clean-up... where do you guys take baths? It feels very uncomfortable; I urgently want to clean myself. I am smelling like shit," Ash complained like a petulant child, making an ugly face.

James rolled his eyes playfully, clearly understanding why Ash behaving in such a way, "You can take a bath here in the garden. Just fill that big bucket from the barrel. I always do it in the open air. Or, if you feel shy like Grandma, you can use the toilet as cover; water will come out under the door, so no need to worry. But I recommend you do it here in the open; it's more fun and comfortable than doing it in that small space," James replied seriously.

"Ugh, why on earth wouldn't your father build a proper bathroom? This outdoor business is ridiculous! Ash grumbled, sounding more like a frustrated toddler than a grown man.

"Well, actually, he did," James explained. "But Grandma's old, and I'm too young to carry water inside the house, we actually never use it. But if you don't have a problem carrying water, the small room under the stars is the bathroom."

Hearing about the bathroom James, who was confused at the beginning, suddenly remembered the small abandoned room that he had never seen anyone using before and replied casually.

"Really? That's great. At least there is a bathroom," Ash's previously dull and listless eyes suddenly lit up upon hearing that there was a bathroom inside the house that never got the chance to showcase its abilities just because there was no one to carry heavy water buckets. He quickly filled the 20-or-so-liter capacity bucket with water excitedly and carried it back inside the house.

"Huh? Wait, where are you taking this water bucket?"