As the mysterious green orb came closer, the boar immediately turned his head to lock eyes on it. But the boar's disposition softened. The muscles in its back and neck relaxed.

Andy looked more closely at the green light. It had wings.

"Hello," the little green orb said in a surprisingly posh accent. "I'm Perry, and I'm a minor earth elemental. My summoner, a novice sorcerer named Kermit, sent me over here to broker peace between the man and the boar."

Andy continued gasping for breath. The hog had fractured something in his chest, probably a rib, and knocked the wind out of him.

"What seems to be the issue between you two?" the elemental said.

"I really, I don't know… he just… the pig smashed through the wall and started attacking me."

"I see," said Perry. "Now let me get the boar's side of the story."

The elemental floated over to the boar, hovering just above his eyes. The boar watched, transfixed, and gave a few grunts.

"The boar says you aggressed."

"That's just not true," Andy said, "I'm not the one who knocked a wall down and tried to stab someone."

"Well, whatever the case, you both feel justified in your own eyes," Perry said. "You feel that the boar attacked you, and the boar feels that you attacked him. The truth is rather unimportant, what matters is a mutual good will toward one another, and a willingness to work out your differences. That way we can move forward. What do you say we get a fresh start?"

This was bizarre. A fairy was essentially playing the role of a counselor mediating between him and the boar.

The boar grunted.

"The boar will if you will," said Perry. "He doesn't much like the taste of otherworlder meat anyways. He says they are full of microplastics."

"Fine," Andy said.

"You must put away your weapon," said Perry.

"How do I know that the boar won't run me through as soon as I sheathe my sword?"

The boar huffed.

"No, no," Perry said, floating in front of the boar, trying to soothe him, "No, he is not a threat, he is just taking… his… time… putting his sword away."

Andy took the hint. He hoisted his sword back onto his back, with some pain in his ribs.

The boar backed up.

"IT LOOKS LIKE THINGS ARE COOLING DOWN ON THE RED ROUTE," the announcer said.

Kermit emerged from the shadowy corner.

"Hello piggy!" Kermit said.

The boar turned his head toward Kermit.

"Wait," Arlene said, but it was of no use.

"I want to be your friend. Do you want to be my friend?"

The boar approached the child.

"Woah, that is not a good idea," Andy said, instinctively going for the hilt of his sword again.

"Please refrain," said Perry.

Against every fiber of his being, Andy put his hand back down at his side.

This feels stupid. Someone is going to get hurt.

Kermit reached out and touched the boar on the snout, giving him a little rustle.

He's clearly using Befriend Animal, there's no way that boar is letting him get that close otherwise, Andy thought.

"You're a good fella," Kermit said. "What's your name? Perry, can you ask him for me?"

"Certainly," Perry said, dancing back to the pig's eyes. "What are you called?"

The boar grunted.

"He says his name is Pig Large."

"Pig Large?" Kermit said giggling. "That is a really good name. I'm going to call you PL."

"He is going to call you PL," Perry said to the boar.

The boar grunted.

"The boar accepts the name you have given him," Perry said.

"Great!" said Kermit. "I'm Kermit."

Perry relayed the information and the pig let out a gentle squeal.

The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," Perry said. "You are a nice human, the pig says. It's a rare delight."

"Can I sit on your back?" Kermit asked.

Perry repeated the question and the boar immediately lowered himself to the ground.

"Oh boy!" said Kermit.

"Wait," Arlene said again, more fully stepping out of the shadows.

Too late.

Kermit climbed onto the boar's back, and PL stood up and began trotting around the enclosure.

Kermit began giggling and the pig let out contented grunts.

"PL is awesome!" said Kermit.

"Ok, enough fun," Andy said. "Time to come down. Let's keep going."

Kermit either ignored or didn't hear Andy's words.

"Shall I continue with you?" Perry asked. "I have almost exhausted my energy."

"You can go back to your house," Kermit said, smiling. Then he thought for a moment. "Where is your house, Perry?"

"I reside on the Elemental Plane of Earth," Perry said. "I bid you farewell. I am sure I will see you again sometime."

"Bye!" Kermit said as Perry vanished in a puff of green dust.

"Ok, but really," Andy said. "Let's get down off the dangerous pig."

"Oh alright," Kermit said.

He tapped on the PL's head, and the boar seemed to understand, lowering himself to the ground and allowing the child to dismount.

"Thank you, PL," said Kermit. "I'm glad we got to make a friend today!"

The boar hadn't understood Kermit's meaning because Kermit couldn't talk to animals. But nonetheless, PL rested on the ground. He was now familiar with the three of them and no longer hostile. And he also seemed worn out.

Maybe Kermit had just naturally picked up on PL's vibe.

"Maybe we'll see you on the way back!" Kermit said.

The boar gave a long huff of approval as he curled up in the corner.

***

Andy popped a date in his mouth and savored it as best he could as moved to the huge hole in the wall, next to the golden door. He still hadn't perfected the art of enjoying food while multitasking, but he had tuned into the flavor enough to heal his chest.

He hoisted himself over the rubble of the wrecked wall and peered through the hole into the next area. It was partially shaded, with a giant open cage, presumably for holding the boar. He also noticed something behind the golden door: spring-loaded wall of knives, ready to impale anyone who entered.

"Don't take the door," Andy said, throwing his voice behind him. "It's rigged."

The crew scaled the rubble and made their way into the next room.

Arlene looked at the long, sharp blades waiting on the other side of the golden door.

"That could've been bad," she said, eyeing the spring-loaded trap that would've sent the wall of knives into the body of whoever opened the door. "Really bad."

Andy walked to the center of the enclosure. There was the golden door, waiting to receive an unscrupulous combatant with its knife wall, and beside it was the hole in the wall from the boar's grand entrance.

But to the other side, there was something Andy hadn't noticed in the shrine's courtyard: a simple arched doorway, completely uncovered, no lock. Hell, there wasn't even a door there. It was just an archway. He could see straight through to the other side of the shrine, where PL stood curled up in the corner.

"Wait," Andy said. "Arlene, Kermit, did you see that archway on the other side?"

"No," said Kermit.

Arlene shook her head.

Andy couldn't help himself, he had to verify it. He walked over to the archway.

Either this is another trap or it is a magically disguised door, Andy thought as he entered the archway back into the shrine courtyard.

To his amazement, he stepped through, as if nothing were different. But when he turned around, the wall behind him appeared to be stone. He put his hand through it.

"Illusion magic," Andy muttered. He stepped back through and faced Arlene and Kermit. "I guess that was a test for Detect Enchantment."

"Well, at least we're past it," Arlene said. "We managed to survive without too much harm."

"A stuffed date's worth of harm," Andy said.

Aside from the cage stored under partial cover, there was another golden door on the far side of the enclosure.

"Don't they have anything more creative than golden doors?" Andy said.

"They aren't subtle, that's for sure," said Arlene.

The announcer appeared overhead for the first time in a few minutes.

"AND OVER ON THE RED ROUTE, IT LOOKS LIKE OUR NEW ARRIVALS ARE LAGGING BEHIND," the announcer's voice blared from the horns attached to the platform on which he was hovering around. "THE FORTUNE FINDERS ARE ONE FULL ROOM AHEAD. THEY'RE NOW APPROACHING THE FINAL ROOM, SO THEY MAY VERY WELL WIN THIS CHALLENGE."

"We need to pick it up," Arlene said suddenly, springing into motion and approaching the door on the far wall. "I know this very well may be booby trapped. We need to open it anyway and deal with whatever comes. I'm not losing."

"Let us get out of the way first," Andy said, guiding Kermit off to the side with him.

Arlene reached out and grasped the handle. Andy heard it click as she turned it.

Arlene opened the door and quickly dodged out of the way, but nothing came.

Andy slowly made his way toward the door, peering in. It was an exit into the broader arena. He approached and stepped through, making sure it wasn't trapped before signaling to the others that it was safe.

The crowd cheered as the three of them emerged from the red route's last room. Before them, there were three massive poles, each with very small pegs lining the sides for minimal footholds and handholds.

In front of the first pole, there was a statue of a giant warhammer. The third pole had a statue of a flower. The second pole had no statue in front of it at all.

The other group had already arrived. The elepholk and little girl in the pink dress waited by the base of the first pole while the woman in the black cloak climbed it. She was about halfway up.

"They're already here," Arlene said, her face falling. "And it looks like they've already figured out what pole to climb. We're too late. We can't win without fighting them off, and you agreed not to."

"We lose?" Kermit asked.

"We did our best," Arlene said.

"Wait," said Andy. "Are you sure there's no way back from this? What about the other two poles? What's at the top of them?"

"The announcer said we're looking for the emblem of the goddess of the arena," Arlene said. "That's obviously the warhammer, right?"

"Maybe," said Andy. Then he remembered what Gar had said to him before the third round. "Or maybe the warhammer is a symbol for a different god…"

"Yeah, what god would that be?" Arlene asked. "I'd consult the literature, but we've already established, the print is too small to be of any use without being indiscrete."

"May Temmo's cries echo in your own…" Andy said, trailing off.

"What?" Arlene responded.

"It's just something Gar told me," Andy said. "I think the other team has the wrong pole. I think that pole belongs to Temmo, the berserker's god. He carries a warhammer."

"Well, let's say you're right. The correct choice certainly isn't the flower, right?" Arlene said. "But then that would mean we'd need to pick the…"

Could Antoine have been telling the truth this whole time?

"We need to climb the second pole," Andy said.