I stepped outside and into blackness. Absolute, impenetrable darkness stretched in every direction. No parking lot, no street lamps, no sky. Just... nothing.

I stumbled backward, my breath coming in ragged gasps. This wasn't possible. It couldn't be real.

"Okay, Stanley," I said, running trembling hands through my hair. "Think. Use that big brain of yours. There's gotta be a logical explanation."

Gas leak? No, I'd be unconscious or dead by now.

Mass hallucination? From what? And how was I the only one unaffected?

Alien abduction?

I let out a hysterical laugh. Great. I was losing it.

"Is this some kind of sick joke?" I called out to the void. "Did I piss off some YouTube prankster? Is Ashton Kutcher gonna pop out and tell me I've been Punk'd?"

Silence. Always that goddamn silence.

I spun around, ready to retreat into the familiar confines of Zap's Electronics. But where the storefront should have been, there was only more darkness. My stomach lurched. The neon sign, the automatic doors, the tacky window displays—all gone.

"No. No, no, no."

My fingers clawed at the empty air, searching for something, anything solid. But there was nothing to grab onto. Just an endless void.

A bead of sweat trickled down my spine. The darkness pressed in, thick and oppressive. It felt alive, hungry. I swallowed hard, trying to push down the rising tide of panic.

Then I saw it. A pinprick of light in the distance.

At first, I thought I was imagining things. A hallucination brought on by stress and fear. But it was there, growing larger by the second.

"Hello?" My voice sounded small and pathetic in the vast emptiness. "Is somebody there?"

The light expanded, racing towards me at an impossible speed. It went from a distant star to a approaching headlight to a roaring inferno in a matter of heartbeats.

"Shit!"

I threw my arms up, shielding my face. The light engulfed me, searing through my closed eyelids. It was everywhere, all-consuming.

Then, as quickly as it appeared, it vanished.

The sudden absence of light left me reeling. I blinked rapidly, trying to clear the spots from my vision. As my eyes adjusted, I became aware of a new set of sensations.

The air was damp and cool against my skin. A musty, earthy smell filled my nostrils. My sneakers crunched on uneven ground.

I lowered my arms slowly, almost afraid of what I might see.

Gone was the endless void. Instead, I found myself in a dimly lit cavern. Rough stone walls stretched upward, disappearing into shadows. Stalagmites jutted from the floor like jagged teeth.

"What the hell?"

My voice echoed off the cave walls, bouncing back at me in a disorienting chorus. I stumbled backward, nearly losing my footing on the uneven ground. This couldn't be real. One minute I'm in an electronics store, the next I'm in some kind of subterranean hellscape? It didn't make any sense.

I pinched myself hard, wincing at the sharp pain. Okay, so not dreaming. Unless it was one of those dreams where you think you've woken up but you're still asleep. But then, why did everything feel so... real?

The cave air was thick with moisture, making each breath feel heavy in my lungs. Droplets of water fell from unseen stalactites, their steady plinking creating an eerie rhythm in the silence.

I fumbled for my phone, nearly sobbing with relief when the screen lit up. The "No Service" message mocked me, but at least I had a light source.

I swept the beam around, taking in my surroundings. The cavern stretched out in multiple directions, dark passages branching off like some demented underground maze.

"Hello?" I called out again, my voice cracking. "Is anyone there?"

Only my own echo answered, each repetition more mocking than the last.

I sank to the ground, my back pressed against a damp cave wall. The rough stone dug into my spine, but I barely noticed. My mind raced, trying to make sense of the impossible.

How did I get here? Where even was "here"? And more importantly, how the hell was I going to get back?

I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Just like that meditation app I'd downloaded and never used.

"Okay, Stanley," I muttered. "You're in a cave. Somehow. Step one, don't panic. Step two..."

I opened my eyes, scanning the cavern again.

"Figure out what the fuck is going on."

I pushed myself to my feet, legs shaky but holding. I had to move. Sitting here wallowing in confusion and self-pity wouldn't get me anywhere.

"Eeny, meeny, miny, moe," I muttered, pointing my phone's light at each branching path. "Catch a tiger by the toe..."

My finger landed on a passage to my left. As good a direction as any, I supposed. I took a deep breath and started walking, the beam of my phone cutting through the darkness ahead.

The tunnel was narrow, forcing me to turn sideways in some spots to squeeze through. The rough stone walls scraped against my arms, leaving angry red welts. Each step echoed ominously, the sound bouncing off the walls and coming back distorted.

"If I make it out of here alive," I grumbled, ducking under a low-hanging stalactite, "I'm definitely canceling my gym membership. This is all the cardio I need for a lifetime."

As I rounded a bend, something glinted in the light of my phone. I froze, heart pounding. But it wasn't moving. Slowly, I crept forward.

It was a sword. An honest-to-God sword, stuck point-first in the cave floor.

"Okay, now I know I'm hallucinating," I said, my voice echoing in the chamber. "What's next, a dragon?"

I blinked hard, rubbing my eyes with the heels of my hands. The sword remained, its metallic surface catching the weak light from my phone. But now, hovering above it like some kind of hologram, was a translucent blue box.

The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

"What the..."

I leaned closer, squinting at the text within the box. It read:

[Rusty Iron Sword]

Damage: 5-8

Durability: 5/20

Required Level: 1

"No. No way." I shook my head violently, hoping the apparition would disappear. But the box stubbornly remained, its soft blue glow illuminating the rough cave walls around it.

I recognized this. It was a stat box, like something straight out of an RPG. The kind of thing I'd seen a million times on a screen, never in real life. Because this wasn't supposed to happen in real life.

"I've finally cracked. The stress has gotten to me, and I've gone full psychotic break. That's the only explanation."

But even as I said it, I couldn't quite believe it. Everything felt too real. The damp chill of the cave air, the rough stone beneath my feet, the weight of exhaustion in my limbs. Could a hallucination be this vivid?

I reached out, half-expecting my hand to pass through the sword like it was a mirage. Instead, my fingers brushed cool metal. The sword was solid, tangible.

The stat box, on the other hand...

I waved my hand through the hovering text. It rippled slightly, like disturbed water, but remained intact. My hand passed right through it, encountering no resistance.

"Okay, so the sword is real, but the magic floating text isn't. That's... progress, I guess?"

I circled the sword, studying it from different angles. It looked old and worn, its blade notched in places. The hilt was wrapped in what might have once been leather, now cracked and peeling. It matched the "Rusty Iron Sword" description perfectly.

I reached for the sword's hilt, hesitating just before my fingers made contact. What if touching it triggered something? In the games, picking up a weapon like this usually started a tutorial or unleashed a horde of monsters.

"Don't be ridiculous," I told myself. "It's just a prop. A very convincing prop, but still..."

I wrapped my hand around the hilt. The leather grip felt rough against my palm, oddly comforting in its solidity. I tugged, expecting resistance.

Instead, the sword slid free with surprising ease, as if it had been waiting for me to claim it.

As soon as the blade cleared the ground, a chime sounded. Not from anywhere in the cave, but seemingly inside my own head. A new notification appeared in my field of vision:

[Item Acquired: Rusty Iron Sword]

[Basic Swordsmanship Skill Unlocked]

"What the actual fuck?" I nearly dropped the sword in shock. The weight of it felt right in my hand, balanced in a way I couldn't explain but instinctively understood.

I swung it experimentally, the blade cutting through the air with a satisfying whoosh. It felt natural. As if I'd been training with swords my entire life, instead of scanning barcodes at a dead-end retail job.

"Okay, Stanley," I said, grip tightening on the hilt. "Let's think this through logically. You're either having the most vivid hallucination in the history of mental breakdowns, or..."

Or what? I was trapped in some kind of real-life video game? The idea was absurd, impossible. And yet, here I stood, holding a sword I somehow knew how to use, with stat boxes and notifications dancing at the edge of my vision.

A low rumble filled the chamber. The floor began to shake, pebbles skittering across the stone.

"Oh, come on!" I shouted at the ceiling. "Seriously?"

The rumbling intensified. Cracks spider-webbed across the floor, spreading rapidly. I backpedaled, nearly tripping over my own feet in my haste to get away.

With a thunderous crack, the floor collapsed. I scrambled for purchase, but there was nothing to grab onto. The sword slipped from my grasp as I plummeted into darkness.

I fell for what felt like an eternity, the wind rushing past my ears. This was it. This was how Stanley NULL Oakes met his end. Not with a whimper, but with a splat at the bottom of some godforsaken cave.

Just as I'd resigned myself to my fate, I hit water. The impact knocked the wind out of me, and I flailed wildly, struggling to orient myself in the pitch-black liquid. The icy water shocked my system, its frigid embrace threatening to drag me under. I thrashed, desperate for air, when a searing pain shot through my chest. A translucent red box materialized before my eyes:

[Critical Hit! -25 HP]

What the hell? Before I could process this new absurdity, a green bar appeared at the edge of my vision, pulsing ominously. It was mostly full, but a significant chunk had vanished, replaced by an angry red void.

My lungs burned, screaming for oxygen. I kicked frantically, propelling myself upward. ust as spots began to dance in my vision, my head broke through. I gasped, sucking in great gulps of air. As I broke the surface, gasping and sputtering, the green bar stabilized. My ribs ached with each ragged breath, the pain all too real.

"Fuck... this... cave," I panted, treading water.

As my eyes adjusted, I realized I wasn't in complete darkness. A faint, bluish glow emanated from the water itself, casting eerie shadows on the cavern walls. I paddled in a slow circle, searching for any sign of land. There, about twenty feet away, I spotted a rocky shore.

With a groan, I started swimming. My clothes, heavy with water, tried to drag me down. But the alternative was drowning, so I pushed on. Finally, my feet touched the bottom. I stumbled onto the shore, collapsing onto the rough stone. For a long moment, I just lay there, chest heaving, listening to the water drip from my clothes.

I pushed myself up to a sitting position, wringing water from my shirt. As I did, something caught my eye. There, lying on the shore just a few feet away, was the sword.

"You've got to be kidding me. What are you, some kind of boomerang blade?"

I reached for it hesitantly, half-expecting another disaster to strike. But nothing happened as my fingers closed around the hilt. I lifted it, water droplets cascading off the metal.

"Alright, sword," I said. "I don't know what your deal is, but right now, you're the closest thing I have to an ally in this place. So... truce?"

The sword, unsurprisingly, didn't respond. But as I stood, gripping it tightly, I felt a little less alone in the vast, unknown cavern.

I stumbled along the shoreline, the sword clutched in one hand, my waterlogged shoes squelching with each step. The eerie blue glow from the water cast dancing shadows on the cave walls, making it hard to distinguish real features from tricks of the light.

"If this is some elaborate prank," I called out to the empty cavern, "you've made your point. Ha ha, very funny. Can I go home now?"

Only my echo answered.

As I rounded a bend in the shoreline, something caught my eye. A flicker of movement in the water, just at the edge of my vision. I froze, grip tightening on the sword.

"Hello?"

The water's surface rippled, concentric circles spreading outward from a point about ten feet from shore. I took an involuntary step back, heart pounding.

Suddenly, a head broke the surface. Not human. Not even close. Scales glistened in the blue light, and curved horns jutted from its skull. Yellow eyes, slitted like a cat's, fixed on me.

"Holy shit.”

The creature regarded me for a long moment, tilting its head in a way that seemed almost curious. Then, without warning, it lunged.

I stumbled backward, nearly losing my footing on the slick rocks. The sword came up instinctively, a barrier between me and the thing from the water. But the attack never came. Instead, the creature stopped short, hovering at the water's edge. Its eyes were locked on the sword, a low hiss escaping its throat.

"You don't like this, huh?" I said, waving the sword slightly. The creature flinched back. "Good. Because I don't like you. So how about we just go our separate ways?"

For a tense moment, neither of us moved. Then, with a flick of its tail, the creature dove back beneath the water's surface. I watched the ripples spread, my breath coming in short gasps.

"Right," I muttered. "Lizard monsters. Because why not?"

I turned away from the water, scanning the cavern walls. There had to be a way out of here.

There. About twenty feet up the sheer rock face, an opening. It wasn't ideal, but it beat staying down here with whatever that thing in the water was.

I approached the wall, running my free hand over the rough stone. It was damp and slippery, but there were enough handholds to make climbing possible. Barely.

"Okay, Stanley," I said, psyching myself up. "You can do this. It's just like that rock climbing wall at the company picnic. Except, you know, real. And dangerous. And there's no safety harness. But other than that, totally the same."

I wedged the sword awkwardly through my belt, wincing as the cold metal pressed against my skin. Then, taking a deep breath, I began to climb.

It was slow going. Each movement was a battle against gravity and my own fear. My fingers ached, scraping against the sharp stone as I searched for purchase. More than once, my foot slipped, leaving me dangling by my fingertips.

"Don't look down, don't look down, don't look—"

I looked down. The ground seemed impossibly far away, the blue glow of the water hypnotic. My head swam, vertigo threatening to overwhelm me.

"Shit," I gasped, pressing my forehead against the cool stone. "Come on, Stanley. You can do this. Just a little further."

With a herculean effort, I forced myself to keep climbing. Hand over hand, foot over foot. The opening grew closer, a promise of... well, not safety, exactly. But at least somewhere that wasn't here.

Finally, my hand grasped the edge of the opening. With a grunt of effort, I hauled myself up and over, collapsing onto the floor of a new tunnel. For a long moment, I just lay there, panting. My entire body ached, muscles trembling from the exertion.

"I take it back," I wheezed. "I'm keeping that gym membership. Clearly, I need it."

Slowly, I pushed myself to a sitting position, taking stock of my new surroundings. The tunnel stretched out before me, sloping gently upward. Unlike the natural cavern below, this passage seemed... deliberate. The walls were smoother, almost polished in places.

And at the very end of it, a light.