We froze, our heads snapping towards the source of the interruption. The Slime sat there, its body now a shimmering blue, with two googly eyes blinking up at us. But that wasn't the strangest part.
The voice had come from the Slime.
"I don't mean to interrupt," the creature continued, its voice high-pitched and bubbly, "but I think there's been a bit of a misunderstanding here."
My jaw dropped. I turned to Effie, whose expression mirrored my own shock. "Effie," I whispered, "please tell me that Slime isn't talking."
The fairy's wings buzzed erratically. "I think it is."
The Slime bobbed in what could have been a nod. Its eyes widened, a comical sight on its gelatinous face. "Oh wow, I can think now! This is neat!"
Effie's glow flared, her tiny face contorting with frustration. "Stanley, you numbskull! Do you have any idea what you've done?"
I blinked, still trying to process the talking blob of goo. "Uh, made a new friend?"
"You gave it intelligence!" Effie zipped around my head, leaving a trail of agitated sparkles. "Buffs are meant for you, not your enemies! Now we've got a Slime with the brains of a toddler!"
The Slime wiggled, its newly acquired intellect clearly a source of excitement. "I'm smart now! But... also hungry. Very hungry."
I felt a pang of sympathy. How many times had I been stuck at work, stomach growling, because the store was too busy to take a break?
"Aw, come on, Effie. He's not trying to hurt us. He's just hungry."
Effie's wings buzzed in annoyance. "It's a monster, Stanley. You can't befriend every-"
But I was already reaching into my inventory. The Shimmerfruit materialized in my hand, its purple skin gleaming in the dappled forest light.
The Slime's eyes grew impossibly larger. "Ooh, pretty! Is that food?"
I tossed the fruit towards the creature. It caught the Shimmerfruit with a wet 'plop', absorbing it into its body. The fruit's shape was visible for a moment before dissolving.
"Mmm!" The Slime wiggled with joy. "Yummy! Thank you, nice tall person!"
I couldn't help but grin. "You're welcome, little guy."
Effie groaned, burying her face in her tiny hands. "This is not how monster encounters are supposed to go."
I shrugged, watching as the Slime bounced happily. "See? He's not bad. He was just hungry."
The fairy shot me a withering look. "Fine. But don't come crying to me when your new 'friend' tries to absorb you in your sleep."
I rolled my eyes, then turned back to the Slime. "So, uh, I guess introductions are in order. I'm Stanley, and this grumpy little pixie is Effie."
"I'm not grumpy!" Effie protested. "I'm justifiably concerned!"
The Slime bobbed excitedly. "Nice to meet you! I'm... um..." It paused, its gelatinous form quivering in concentration. "I don't think I have a name."
"Well, what's the first sound you remember making?" I asked, crouching down to eye level with the creature.
The Slime's eyes scrunched up, deep in thought. Then, with a sudden burst of enthusiasm, it announced, "Plop! That's the first sound I made when I formed!"
I chuckled. "Alright then, Plop it is."
Effie groaned again. "Great. You've named it. Now you'll want to keep it."
Plop bounced happily. "Plop! I'm Plop! Stanley and Effie are my friends!"
I couldn't help but smile at the creature's infectious enthusiasm. It was like watching a puppy discover its tail for the first time.
"Hold on there, buddy," Effie interjected, her tiny arms crossed. "We're not friends. We're temporary acquaintances, at best."
Plop's body drooped slightly, a remarkable feat for a creature without solid form. "But... Stanley gave me food. And a name. Doesn't that make us friends?"
I shot Effie a pointed look. "Come on, don't be mean. He's just a kid! Essentially."
The fairy's wings fluttered in agitation. "That's exactly my point! We can't be responsible for a child Slime! We have quests to complete, skills to level up!"
Plop perked up at this. "Ooh, quests? Can I help? I want to be useful!"
I grinned, an idea forming. "You know, Effie, having a Slime around might come in handy. Think of all the small spaces he could squeeze into."
Effie's glow dimmed slightly as she considered this. "I suppose... No! Absolutely not. We are not adopting a monster!"
But as she ranted, I noticed Plop inching closer to her. The Slime's eyes were wide with admiration, tracking the fairy's every movement.
"Pretty sparkly," Plop murmured, mesmerized by Effie's glowing trail.
Effie paused mid-tirade, glancing down at the awestruck Slime. For a moment, her stern expression softened.
"Well... I suppose he is rather cute, in a gelatinous sort of way."
"So, does this mean Plop can stay?"
Effie sighed, her tiny shoulders slumping in defeat. "Fine. But he's your responsibility, Stanley. I'm not cleaning up any slime trails!"
Plop bounced with joy, his entire body rippling. "Yay! We're all friends now!"
I chuckled, patting the Slime gently. Its surface was cool and slightly sticky, like damp Jell-O.
"So, Plop, got any cool Slime tricks up your... well, I guess you don't have sleeves. But you know what I mean."
Plop's eyes crinkled in what I assumed was his version of a smile. "Ooh, I can do this!"
Before our eyes, Plop's body began to shift and stretch. He elongated himself into a thin, noodle-like shape, then compressed into a perfect sphere. Finally, he morphed into a miniature, blobby version of me, complete with a gooey rendition of my tousled hair.
Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.
"Ta-da!" Plop exclaimed in his bubbly voice, his gelatinous 'arms' spread wide.
I whistled, impressed. "Now that's something you don't see every day."
Effie, despite her earlier protests, leaned in for a closer look. "Fascinating. The shapeshifting capabilities of Slimes are rarely observed up close."
Plop, basking in the attention, continued his demonstration. He oozed towards a narrow gap between two rocks, his body stretching and thinning until he slipped through with ease.
"See? I can fit anywhere!" His voice echoed from the other side of the rocks.
As Plop squeezed back through to join us, Effie's brow furrowed. "Stanley, is it just me, or is Plop... glowing?"
I squinted at our slimy friend. Sure enough, a faint, pulsing light seemed to emanate from within his translucent body.
"Huh, would you look at that. Hey Plop, did you know you could glow?"
"I can? Cool!"
"Stanley, why don't you check Plop's stats? That intelligence buff might have unlocked some new abilities."
"How do I do that?"
"Just focus on Plop and think about his stats. That should do it."
I nodded, focusing on Plop and willing his character sheet into existence. A translucent screen materialized before me, filled with information about our new ally.
I squinted at the shimmering screen, trying to make sense of the jumble of numbers and icons. Plop's stat sheet flickered into focus, a bizarre mix of standard RPG attributes and... well, Slime-specific traits.
[Plop - Level 2 Intelligent Slime]
HP: 10/10
MP: 5/5
STR: 2
DEX: 5
INT: 2 (↑1)
WIS: 2
CHA: 2
[Skills]
• Amorphous Form (Passive): Can squeeze through small spaces
• Shapeshifting (Active): Can mimic simple shapes and textures
• Bioluminescence (Passive): Emits a soft glow
• Absorb (Active): Can consume and temporarily gain properties of some absorbed items
[Status Effects]
• Intelligence Boost: INT +1 (Permanent)
"Whoa," I breathed, eyes widening. "Effie, are you seeing this?"
The fairy zipped over, her tiny glasses glinting as she scanned the stats. "Fascinating! I've never seen a monster with such a drastic intelligence boost. And that Absorb skill! It could be quite powerful if used correctly."
Plop wiggled excitedly. "Ooh, what does it all mean? Am I special?"
"You sure are, buddy. Looks like that potion did more than just make you chatty. It unlocked a skill called 'Bioluminescence'."
"Plop, try focusing on that glowing feeling. See if you can control it," Effie said.
Plop's face scrunched up in concentration. Slowly, the glow from his body intensified, casting a soft blue light across the forest clearing.
"I'm doing it!" Plop exclaimed, his voice filled with childlike wonder.
"Great job, buddy," I encouraged. "Now, try changing the color."
Plop's brow furrowed again, and gradually, his glow shifted from blue to a warm yellow, then a vibrant green.
Effie circled Plop, her analytical gaze taking in every detail. "Remarkable. The ability to control both intensity and color could be incredibly useful."
As Plop continued to experiment with his newfound glow, I noticed a look of concern on Effie's tiny face. She flew over to a nearby tree, peering at the sky through a gap in the leaves.
"Stanley, we've got a problem. The sun's going down."
I glanced up, noticing for the first time the long shadows stretching across the forest floor. The once-cheerful birdsong had started fading, replaced by the ominous hoots of nocturnal creatures.
"So?"
"This isn't some newbie-friendly starting zone, Stanley. Night brings out the real monsters. With your level, we'd be toast."
"What kind of monsters are we talking about here?"
"The kind that make that Slime look like a cuddly toy. We need to get back to town. Now."
I nodded, my heart rate picking up. "Alright, Plop, fun's over. Time to head back."
Plop's glow dimmed slightly. "Aw, but I was just getting good at this!"
"You can practice more later, buddy. Right now, we need to-"
A thunderous crash cut me off. The ground shook, leaves raining down around us. Something massive was moving through the canopy above.
"Effie?" I whispered, my voice barely audible over the sound of my pounding heart. "What was that?"
The fairy's glow had dimmed to almost nothing, her tiny form pressed against my shoulder. "Nothing good. We need to run. Now!"
But before we could move, a dark shape plummeted from the trees. It landed with a sickening thud, blocking our path back to town. As it unfolded its legs - all eight of them - I felt my blood run cold.
A spider. But not just any spider. This monstrosity was the size of a Volkswagen, its carapace gleaming like polished obsidian in the fading light. Multiple eyes, each the size of my fist, fixed on us with predatory intent.
A notification popped up in my peripheral vision:
[Encountered: Nightweaver Arachnid (Level 20)]
[Warning: Enemy far exceeds your current level!]
"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," I said, taking an involuntary step back.
Effie's voice was a terrified squeak. "Stanley, we can't fight that thing. We need to find another way around!"
But as I turned to look for an escape route, I saw with horror that the Nightweaver had been busy. Gossamer strands of webbing, nearly invisible in the twilight, crisscrossed our retreat. We were trapped.
The spider advanced, its mandibles clicking ominously. I fumbled for my inventory, searching for anything that might help. My fingers closed around the remaining potion vial - the gurgling green one Effie had mentioned earlier.
A cheerful chime cut through the tension, completely at odds with our dire situation. A new notification appeared:
[New Party Member Joined: Plop]
[Party Status: Stanley (Leader), Plop]
"What the- Plop? Now's not the time for-"
But Plop was already in motion. His gelatinous body began to pulse with light, slowly at first, then building to a rapid, strobing effect. The clearing was bathed in a dizzying array of colors - neon green, electric blue, blinding white.
The Nightweaver recoiled, its many eyes blinking rapidly in confusion. It swayed on its massive legs, momentarily disoriented by Plop's impromptu light show.
"Stanley!" Effie's shout snapped me back to reality. "The potion! Use it now!"
I didn't need to be told twice. With a silent prayer to whatever digital deity might be listening, I hurled the vial at the spider's face.
The potion arced through the air. It shattered against the Nightweaver's carapace, sizzling green liquid splashing across its eyes and mandibles. The spider reared back, emitting a bone-chilling screech that set my teeth on edge.
[Critical Hit! Nightweaver Arachnid HP -25%]
For a moment, hope surged through me. We might actually survive this!
But the Nightweaver wasn't finished. With terrifying speed, it whipped around, its abdomen aimed squarely at me. Before I could react, a stream of sticky webbing shot out, enveloping me from chest to ankles.
[Status Effect: Paralyzed]
[Duration: 30 seconds]
[Warning: You are vulnerable to attack!]
I toppled over, my limbs frozen in place. Panic clawed at my throat as I watched the Nightweaver approach, its mandibles dripping with venom.
"Effie! Plop! Do something!"
But Effie was nowhere to be seen, likely having phased through a nearby tree in terror. And Plop... wait, where was Plop?
A low, rumbling growl filled the clearing. It started soft, building to a thunderous roar that shook the very ground beneath me. The Nightweaver paused, its many eyes darting around in search of this new threat.
From the shadows emerged... a bear? No, not quite. It was Plop, but he had shapeshifted into a monstrous hybrid of bear and slime. Towering over even the Nightweaver, this new form rippled with gelatinous muscles. Bioluminescent patches pulsed along its flanks, and a maw filled with glowing, needle-sharp teeth gaped wide.
The Nightweaver, faced with this terrifying new predator, didn't hesitate. It turned tail and fled, crashing through its own web in its haste to escape. Within seconds, the spider had vanished into the darkening forest, leaving only tattered strands of silk in its wake.
As the sounds of the Nightweaver's retreat faded, Plop's bear-slime form began to shrink and lose definition. Soon, he was back to his familiar blob shape, though noticeably larger than before.
[Quest Complete: Survive the Nightweaver!]
[XP Gained: 500]
[Plop has leveled up! Plot is now Level 2]
"That... was... AWESOME!" Plop bounced excitedly, his body still faintly glowing. "Did you see me, Stanley? I was all growly and big and scary!"
I laughed, a slightly hysterical edge to my voice as the paralysis began to wear off. "You were amazing, buddy. You saved our butts back there."
Effie reappeared, looking sheepish. "I, uh, went to get help. But it seems Plop had it under control. Stanley, are you alright?"
I nodded, finally able to sit up as the webbing dissolved. "Yeah, thanks to our new party member here. Plop, I don't suppose that Absorb skill of yours works on spider silk? Because I could really use a change of clothes."
Plop's eyes widened. "Ooh, I didn't even think of that! Let me try!"
As Plop began to experiment with the discarded webbing, Effie hovered close, her expression a mix of relief and lingering concern.
"We really need to get back to town, Stanley. That Nightweaver won't stay away forever, and who knows what else is out here."
I nodded, climbing to my feet on shaky legs. "Yeah, I think I've had enough forest adventure for one day. What do you say we find a nice, safe inn and figure out our next move?"
Effie's glow brightened in agreement. "Now that's the smartest thing you've said all day. Come on, Plop! Leave the spider silk alone. We're heading back to civilization."
As we set off towards the comforting lights of Millhaven, I couldn't help but marvel at how quickly my life had changed. From dealing with angry customers to battling giant spiders alongside a fairy and a sentient slime. One thing was certain - my days of being a returns and exchanges specialist were well and truly behind me.