The others all filter out of the park, albeit reluctantly. Audrey had promised my father to look after me, and she seems to take that very seriously. I wouldn’t be surprised if Audrey, and probably Baylee as well, hover around the edge of the park to catch back up with us as soon as we leave.
Their departure leaves Akari and I alone with General Novak, and for a moment, we all stand in silence in the flowerbed-strewn park, listening to the burbling of the artificial stream and feeling the sunlight warm our skin. Once the others are sufficiently far away, General Novak nods to herself and gestures to a pair of benches placed across from one another. “Come,” she says, her voice having lost some of its authoritative edge, “let’s sit.”
Swallowing nervously, Akari and I make our way over to the indicated benches, with me wincing with every step. I’d gotten out of my hospital bed in a surge of defiance at my situation — at my helplessness. That does not, however, mean that I’m ready to be up and walking around. And yet, there is work to do. Apparently, the fate of Shinara could rest on the growth and skill of my team and me, so I need to recover as quickly as possible.
General Novak sits down across from us, her fastidiously held stern expression dropping away and letting me see what actually lay underneath. The general looks worn and tired — as if she had been doing this for her entire life and would continue until Japan fell. As if she had seen countless friends go out to fight and never return. That worry had drawn lines on her face and put strands of gray in her hair before her years. How many sentinels has she seen die?
I speak before I can even consider my words, perhaps my title stirring me to action. “Ma’am… are you okay?”
General Novak looks up and gives a smile tinged with sadness, “Yes, Serena. I’m okay,” she replies immediately — a reply I immediately peg as a lie.
A moment later, General Novak sits up straight once more, the exhaustion dropping away from her and her authoritative expression reasserting itself. Her entire body language shifts, quickly becoming as crisp and professional as her business suit.
“Ma’am,” Akari starts, a touch tentatively, “why did you ask us to stay behind?”
General Novak seems to assess her words before saying, “To put things simply, your families are attempting to sue the GDF Branch in Shinara.”
Beside me on the bench, Akari reaches down to take my hand in hers and gives me a nervous squeeze. I return it, although my heart rate had quickened, and my free hand had begun to tremble like a leaf blown in a gentle autumn breeze. We had expected this, of course — or at least something similar. But how is my family involved? Dad would never go along with Akari’s wretched uncle, of that I’m certain.
“My family, we expected,” Akari says, her voice clipped and nervous. “Why is Serena’s family suing, and why is the suit against the GDF?”
General Novak sighs deeply at the question. Bending down, she plucks a small blue flower and rolls its stem absently in her hand. She studies it for a moment before she begins to absently strip it, peddle by cerulean peddle. “Serena’s grandfather, from America, has come to sue for her to be transferred to the GDF branch in Miami. Your family has also thrown its weight behind his accusations that we have been grossly mistreating both you and Serena, and you should be transferred from the Japan GDF branches for your own safety,” General Novak explains, the blue peddles drifting to the ground in the artificial breeze of the hub, scattering and waiting to be crushed under heel on the walking path.
I stare at those blue peddles as my vision begins to blur. The nerves swirling in my stomach had grown worse and worse as the general spoke until they combined with the burning pain of my injury until they felt like a beast ravaging my insides. My breaths come quick, and I can’t stop staring at those blue peddles — so beautiful… but not for much longer.
This is too much — too much and too soon. Grandpa wants to take me from Japan? Why? Why now? Why is all of this happening at once?
“Surely he can’t win such a suit,” Akari was saying. “The GDF won’t stand for it. Not to mention that Serena’s father would never do anything to endanger his daughter.”
General Novak crushes the remains of the flower in her palm. “For all intents and purposes, in Shinara, I am the GDF. Tokyo will stand with us, of course, but the American branches are both more influential and have more powerful sentinels than we do. This case will come down to a jury; the Americans will make sure of it, and if we can’t convince them that you are not being mistreated, they will ensure the transfer takes place. A sentinel being mistreated is considered a lot like a weapon being misused; they want to come and strip us of that weapon — that being you in this case.”
Not being mistreated, I think, watching as General Novak drops the crushed blue flower. I remember the fear of being in that incursion, the freezing rain soaking me to the bone. I remember the piece of rebar ripping through my middle, the desperation of stabbing down at the mind flayer, and knowing that if I failed, we would all die. I remember General Novak herself telling us that we would be going into more incursion zones, being trained intensely to be the best of the best. More incursion zones, more injuries, more pain. More trips into hell where everyone present flipped a coin to learn if they would emerge or not. Not being mistreated.
I take a shaky breath, and my mind drifts back to the one time I had met my grandfather in person. I mostly remember hiding behind my father while they argued, but before then, my grandfather had been at least somewhat kind to me. He’d spoken with me gently about what I was doing in school and encouraged me to keep pushing myself to do better. Why would he do something like this? Unless he really does think America would be better for me… safer for me.
My mind is still oddly analytical as my emotions descend further into chaos. My entire body trembles now, and tears drip down to land on the concrete beside the broken peddles of the flower. I stare at those peddles, at the crushed stem — ripped apart piece by piece before being entirely crushed.
This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.
[Serena?] Celeste asks, nuzzling my face from her spot upon my shoulder.
“Celeste… I’m not sure I can keep doing this. Every time I think I have things figured out, they just get worse. I… how am I meant to save Japan? Maybe… maybe Grandpa is right… maybe he’s just trying to pull me from the fire,” I say, although it’s hard to muster the mental energy required to send the words to Celeste.
Akari and the general keep speaking, occasionally throwing glances my way. A surge of embarrassment moves through me. Here I am, crying in front of the general of the GDF. How disgraceful… Yet, right now, it’s hard to bring myself to care. Still, I force myself to pay attention once more.
Akari beside me doesn’t seem much better off than I am, clutching my hand like a lifeline. Her eyes are wide with fear as she listens to General Novak say something I don’t quite catch.
Swallowing, Akari says, “You make it sound like you expect the Americans to win.”
General Novak shrugs at this, “I expect the strongest branches to start poaching sentinels from the weaker ones more and more as the year goes on. They will entice them with safety for themselves and their families, even as they leave millions to die by abandoning their home cities. This lawsuit is just them trying a more forceful hand when they know that enticement might not work.”
“Ma’am…” I start, my voice sounding… broken. “If Japan is set to fall… doesn’t it make sense to start evacuating people to places better set to handle the crisis? Shinara is just a place; if we can save the people… then isn’t that the ultimate goal.”
At this, General Novak nods sharply, “It is, Serena, but you have to understand that there are nearly 20 million people in Shinara and that number again in Tokyo. Sure, we could evacuate some to America in the time we have remaining if they were even willing to take us, but you know who would be the ones getting left behind, don’t you?”
I sigh, thinking back to my trip to my mother’s grave, of the untold millions lost in the underbelly of Shinara. They would be the ones to be left behind. Without its sentinels and military, the city would be overrun in a matter of days, and every single one of them would die.
My eyes fall back to the ground, “I understand,” I say simply.
“Good,” General Novak says before continuing. “Serena, your grandfather wants to pull you, Akari, and your father out of Japan and into America’s stronghold. Honestly, I can’t even blame him for wanting to do so, but I have to put up resistance as you are both part of the team that I believe can save Shinara. Before we go any further, however, I have to ask the question: do you want to go?”
Beside me, Akari responds instantly, “I will stay with Serena, no matter what happens,” she says without hesitation. I give her hand another squeeze, her words warming my heart.
I close my eyes for a long moment, still fighting against the pain and nerves and my own roiling emotions. Finally, though, I look up and meet General Novak’s dark eyes. “You truly believe that we have a chance, that our team can make a difference?” I ask, and the power vested in me by my title flares.
I want to know this truth; I want to know what she’s hiding, what makes her vulnerable. Because sometimes, a patient is too far gone to be healed. I will throw my own life away in an attempt to save Japan if required, but if I have a chance to save my father, to save Akari, and all I have to do is let my grandfather have his way? Maybe he could save my entire team? Maybe if I talked to him, he would be willing to bring everyone and their families. Either way, if there is no chance of saving Shinara, not truly, then I have to save who I can.
General Novak looks shaken by the effect of my power-infused words, but eventually, she nods her head. “I do believe that Japan can be saved… something is coming, something I can’t tell you about. But if we can survive the year, we can survive. Of that much, I swear. Japan can be saved.”
Akari and I share a glance before, finally, I nod. “Okay, let’s try and save Shinara.”
Scene Break [https://i.imgur.com/H7S9RSV.png]
Akari supports me as we walk back towards my hospital room, our hands still tightly linked. We hadn’t encountered Baylee or Audrey on our way out of the park, so we simply walk together. The halls of the hospital floor are crowded with people moving between the rooms, a startling number of which are occupied. While many of them are probably injured soldiers, I wonder just how common it is for sentinels to need to be admitted after returning from an incursion. From how Audrey had spoken, the answer is probably more than I’d like.
As we walk, Akari turns to me, and I notice with a start that we are now the same height. I could have sworn she was half an inch shorter than me just last week.
“Serena?” Akari asks, her voice hesitant. “Are you doing alright? I know that meeting can’t have been easy, but…”
I hang my head, knowing what she’s getting at. I’d broken down, my fear had overwhelmed me, and while I hadn’t quite had a panic attack, it was certainly close to it. I take a deep breath, meeting Akari’s brown eyes. “Honestly? No. Not really. But I have to be, so that’s that.”
Akari gives a soft smile, “I believe it was you who said that a mental wound can be just as serious as a physical one. Have you changed your mind, or do you just think that you don’t count?”
I clench my free hand into a fist with frustration, the pain in my stomach burning with agony. “I can’t let myself fall apart, not all the way. If I break… I don’t know if I can put myself back together again.”
We stay silent for a while until we arrive back at my hospital room, where Akari and I sit side by side on the edge of the bed. The room smells newly cleaned, that same lemony scent that always greets me in the GDF lobby in the morning.
Seconds tick by as we sit in silence, hand in hand, as we watch the fading sunlight filter through the window and into the room.
“I get it, you know,” Akari says. “What it feels like to stand on the edge.”
I offer her a sad smile, “I know you do. Perhaps you are the only other one who does.”
Akari huffs a pained laugh, “Give the others a chance, I think. Baylee just got rejected by her family, and she’s living here at the GDF Headquarters now. I don’t really know about Haruto, but Claire has lost her entire family and now her arm. Honestly… I think we all get it.”
I let out a weak laugh as well, “What a sorry bunch we are. I don’t know how we could save a cat from a tree, let alone Shinara,” I say, making a mental note to talk to Baylee more — she hadn’t told me about her family.
Akari nods, and we sit in silence for a moment longer. “We can do it, you know,” Akari says eventually, “be the kind of sentinels that general wants. Maybe even save Shinara.”
“I know,” I respond, my eyes falling. “That’s the part that scares me more than anything else, I think. The fact that we could do it, so if we don’t… all those deaths are on us.”
“That’s not how this works, and you know it,” Akari says firmly. “For a long time, I thought I deserved the things my family did and said to me; I believed I was the demon child they said I was and that it was my fault they had to do those things. Only after you helped me did I truly start to see that what they were doing to me was not because of me. In the same way, if we do fail, it is the Volcora at fault… not us.”
“That’s wise, I suppose,” I say, my eyes still downcast. “I’m lucky I have you. I’m not sure what I’d do if I had to handle this alone.”
Akari smiles, fully and genuinely, “And I’m lucky I have you. I think that… as long as we’re together, we can handle whatever comes. Whether that’s fighting for Shinara or fleeing to America.”
I laugh, but this time, I actually feel it just a little. “Maybe we can.”