The night after my potion-brewing lesson was a very calm one. Ukalata and me spent the rest of the day kissing each other, going over the new curves on my body and giving each other headpats. It was after about four to five hours later that Ukalata seemingly remembered something as she facepalmed with her robot hand, which seemed to not hurt her in the slightest.
“I FORGOT TO GIVE YOU A FAMILIAR DANGIT.” she screamed out, shaking me in her arms as if to shake whatever she was looking for out of me.
“You forgot to give me what?” I looked at her as she continued to rattle me akin to somebody trying to shake snacks out of a vending machine.
“Okay so usually when we become patrons to a mortal, we goddesses are supposed to gift our patrons with a familiar, little animal buddies that are supposed to help you with small things in your day to day witchcrafting lives…. But you are the first patron I ever got, so I am not entirely sure on what to do other than I AM FUCKING IT UPPPPPPPPPP.” Ukalata stopped shaking me, my whole body feeling like stirred up jello as she seemed to look for a solution to this otherworldly obligation that she had to fulfill. Her eyes suddenly lit up as she heard Janice meow at us, demanding that we give her more nourishment that is not dry.
“We could build a familiar together! I get to show you the ropes on how the heckies technomancy works and we get to do something cute and gay together!” she said as her face was as bright as the gosh dang sun. If I hadn’t fallen in love with her back when we first met in the palace of the gods I would have done so now. Gosh this girl is melting my heart.
“Sure~” was all I was able to get out of my mouth, grinning like an idiot as she dragged me away to our PC table turned makeshift witchcraft station.
Ukalata dumped a bunch of electronic parts onto the table, sorting them in a way that I didn’t quite understand.
“So the basis of technomancy is honestly very simple. We flex on Victor Frankenstein. It’s basically giving life to mechanical parts. And unlike him using lightning, we just ask nature for a favor, and then the machines move like living things.” She picked up one of the motors and a gear. “It’s also great for reducing the mountains of electronic waste that are lying around the world, as we are able to make them work again in the things we are breathing a ‘soul’ into.” She put the bits she was holding down and giggled a bit. ”Of course, the idea of souls is very vague, and even the different gods of dead and death have no clue how it works. We’re basically necromancers, but with wires and chips and metal instead of bones and meat and junk.”
I raised an eyebrow as I picked up one of the fried wires she wanted to use in whatever it was that she wanted to build, but this is both my girlfriend and a goddess so she definitely knew what she was doing.
“But what exactly do we do with this now? I have never really built anything with electronics before so this whole mess of adult lego pieces leaves me a bit stumped.” I asked her, watching her hands very carefully. She let out a loud snort, taking the wire I had out of my hand before placing it somewhere on top of the motor, the both of them changing shape and coloration into much smaller bits that looked brand new.
“It’s all in your mind. You don’t really need to know anything about this stuff, as long as you will it to make it working again. Do you honestly think that a necromancer knows anything about the human body? Hell no, they just know how to resurrect it, and it's going to probably be the same deal for you. How do you think the Bone Spider got invented?”
I wanted to raise my hand in comment to that but I didn’t really know how to refute that, Ukalata taking that moment to give me a kiss on the cheek as we started to tinker.
It took me a while to fully figure out how to exert power over the parts but I got the hang of it... Somehow. Ukalata’s Idea was to build a little robotic cat, which was such an adorable idea. We were just about done with what should be the internals.
“Do you know what you want to name her?” she inquired, looking at me as she kneaded two pieces of pink plastic together as if they were clay.
“ Felicity. That sounds like a cute name for a smol teeny tiny pink cat.” I replied, giving her a peck on the cheek
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“ Why do I feel like i heard that name before...” Ukalata mumbled before going back to kneading. “Do you mind if I tell you some ye old gods bullshit while we work on this? I love being with you and this has been pretty nice so far but it is getting really boring when both of us are being shy cuties and don’t talk a lot.” She threw the bit of plastic on the desk, as if to get the air out. “Plus it’s awkward to vent about them up top. You never know when Thanatos might be around the corner as you call him an edgy fucker.”
“Sure my love. I am curious to hear what the gods are even doing up there. Must be a lot of weird stuff happening that mortals like me never hear of.” I say, which made Ukalata groan a bit as she started to talk.
“You don’t even know what bullshit happens.For example, Hera STILL misgenders Dionysus despite her constantly correcting her.” She shook her head, before sighing deeply. “Hurbenos, the dude that was going around back in egypt, trying to steal the souls of kids, turn them into his obedient puppets and all that jazz. Hasn’t tried to get with the times any bit other than trying to wear that cheap suit of his and stalk the woods now because he thinks that's easier then just… making a regular contract with someone with their consent?” Ukalata began rolling out the plastic. “He still uses the shtick he did 2000 years ago and complains so fucking much that it doesn’t work out for him.” She took a piece and formed an ear. “And every single time I tried to tell him that he had to adapt with the new world, and then some twink he mistook for a kid comes around, tells him about suits and now he is just fucking lurking in the dark forest with his gucci 3 piece with his oh so menacing no face routine and it got so boring so long ago and its just URGH.” she threw her hands up in defeat. “ And don’t even get me started about when I came out of the closet. All these smug idiots going ‘oh so it’s like when I transform into a bull to go to earth and seduce a mortal lady’ that isn’t the fucking same, Zeus, I’m doing this to be myself, not because I want to cheat on my jealous wife!” She made a second ear. “The only ones who hi-fived me were Dio, the sweet girl, and Athena. Loki was busy pranking folks to visit, but they sent me a card later.” She snorted. “Artemis was neck deep in girls so she just gave me a thumbs up. Aphrodite was in that pile of girls, so.”
“Girls.” I said in response
“Girls.” Ukalata replied, both of us swooning. “And there were two other girls who I have really big crushes on and talk to from time to time. They are so so so cute! Both of them are minor goddesses, one of them for cats, the other for foxes. The kitty goddess is called Pat’Me, she is an adorable tiny girl with calico fur and the others name is Vulpely who looks like a snowfox and melts as quickly as the snow.” Her face got as red as cherries, as she groaned in that specific way gay girls do in certain situations. You know the sound. “They’re both just so tiny and cute and I wanna pick them both up and cuddle them a lot! Pat’Me’s a little bit of a butt at times, but a cutiebutt nonetheless. And Vulpely, gosh, Vulpely spends more time as a blushy puddle than as a snowfox. They’re so so good.”
“Gosh with how your gushing about them I definitely want to meet them sometime. Wanna set up a date with them?”
“Will do so as soon as I can.” she said, not even looking up as she finished the eyes of the kitten. Of course it was kawaii anime eyes, what else did I expect from her? “But to get back on ranting about stupid idiot gods. These idiots really didn’t know what to do when Florene and Pevelies decided that they wanted to transition as well.” She began molding some of the scrap metal into something resembling bones. “They all knew that trans people existed, heck they even had their own deity in La’Shay, but she was not often with the other people and wanted none of the drama going on in the Olymp. But Florene and Pevelies were the gods of War and torture, they were hypermasculine manly men who honestly tried their hardest to seem manly. And for some odd reason murder was assigned to be something men did. It doesn’t make any sense at all if you think about it for even a few seconds but that was just how they tried to cope with their confusion about their gender identity.” She shook her head, before giggling again. “Nicer memories, though, just to balance stuff out. I just remembered how Dionysus cosplayed Dio when JoJo was a thing. And then part 3 happened. She made this special wine that let her just yell out Za Warudo and we’d freeze! I think she still has some of it stashed away.”
I tried not to laugh out loud from that, snickering as Ukalata finally put every single part together. She did most of the work by accident as I was too focused on listening to her.
She booped the little cat on the nose, its eyes lighting up as it started to boot up.
“Hewwo.” the tiny cat said, in an accent I wasn’t really able to place.
“Ah shit. I made Robo-Pat’Me by accident.” Ukalata said, as if she had an epiphany. Janice seemed confused by my new familiar, looking across from the other table. Felicity looked around, her first steps so shaky that she fell from the table and into my hands.
“Owies.” she shook her head, looking up to me. “Hewwo owo.” How did she even pronounce that? This is going to be my familiar now. I gave her a few headpats, which made her purr. It didn’t feel like a fake purr, it felt as if I was petting Janice just now, who decided that it was a good time to jump over to us and demand pets herself. We took them both to bed, both of us busy petting a cat as we cuddled close to each other. The time really flew by today. There was something I wanted to do today, but after a long day of being gay with my goddess girlfriend and creating our own cat I didn’t have the mana left worry about it. Tomorrow me could deal with it.