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Marsupoly: A Tale of Dice and Wombat
Chapter 27 - Riddles, enigmas and annoyances

Chapter 27 - Riddles, enigmas and annoyances

image [https://i.imgur.com/fedDEVJ.jpeg]

Riddle Shrine

Pick one of the offered quest cards.

Will was standing in the middle of a flat platform on top of a mountain. The platform was obviously artificial, being paved by small square stones arranged in an intricate geometrical platform.

Set in a triangle around the edges of the platform were three altars, each with a large card hovering on top of it, its back facing Will.

Unlike the now familiar quest cards Will had encountered before, these cards had a large, ornate, question mark on their backs.

One of the cards was white, one gray and one black.

Riddle shrine. I suppose that means that the cards will have a riddle on them? And I bet it’s going to be a really stupid riddle. Not much I can do about it though. It won’t let me leave without choosing a card.

As reluctant as he was to see what riddle the cards had in store for him, Will still went and touched the white card, knowing that there wasn’t any point in delaying the ordeal.

The two unchosen cards faded away into nothingness, and the remaining one flipped over, showing its face to Will.

Unlike the quest cards, the riddle card didn’t have any text on it. Just a single large image of a man in a business suit. The suit was completely white, and the only spot of color in the entire image was a bronze-colored briefcase held in the man’s hand.

As Will watched the image, he started to have a feeling that the picture wasn’t as motionless as a picture ought to be. It was also slowly gaining depth, shifting from a two dimensional image to a three dimensional figure. And before Will could consider the meaning of the changes, the man stepped out of the picture and started talking.

“Welcome to my office space

For this meeting face to face

Take a rest from endless race

And I’ll lay for you my case

Traveler from far away

Heed my words upon this day

For a riddle I will say

You or I will have to pay”

OK, I have to say that that’s somewhat less stupid than I’d been expecting. I wouldn’t call it good, but maybe it won’t be absolutely terrible?

“Why didn’t the drop bear get hired?”

I guess I was wrong. This is absolutely as completely terrible as possible. Let’s see if I can tune in to whatever this is. I think I’ve heard of drop bears before. It’s an Australian joke about some sort of dire koala, isn’t it? And if this is as stupid as I think it is, then this will be a pun about koalas and qualifications. So, the obvious answer would be that the drop bear wasn’t koalified. But I’m not sure that’s stupid enough here. A drop bear is supposed to be a bigger version of the koala, and one that drops on people’s heads and attacks them. Which would mean that it just about has to be koalified. But it didn’t get the job.

Which means that the answer has to be that the drop bear was overkoalified for the job.

“You are correct!” The suited man opened his briefcase and took out five silver marks, handing them to Will. As soon as Will took the coins, the man faded away, leaving behind a faint “Good luck on your journey!”

Well. That went better than I’d been expecting. I think this place is starting to get to me. Still, that’s better than failing. I’ve got to admit though, if I could actually decide on where I’m going, I’d be avoiding any more riddle shrines in the future.

This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.

With the riddle asked and answered, Will could roll his dice and move on.

***

image [https://i.imgur.com/hj6Vhax.jpeg]

Cycle finished!

Gain 200 copper bits.

3 new Crankscouts created.

Crankscout camouflage improved.

All wounds improve by one category.

All “per cycle” abilities refreshed.

Only three new Crankscouts this time? Nice. Maybe I’ll actually manage to finish that quest someday. Now, where did I get to this time?

Mysterious Door

Deep in the forest,

A mysterious door stands tall.

What lies beyond it?

Just like the message said, in what even Will could identify as a really bad haiku, there was a large, fancy looking door standing in the middle of a forest clearing. It was made out of brown wood, and carved with plant shapes. It was also standing freely, unsupported by anything. As far as Will could see, the door should have been completely pointless, since he could easily go around it to the other side.

But by the weird logic of the Board, Will expected it to lead somewhere completely different than the other side of the clearing.

Not that there was any way to check. The door was locked, and nothing Will tried could get it to open.

Armor piercing claws slid off it harmlessly. Thunder Balls burst, leaving not even a scorch mark behind. Will even tried out his new Re-vole-ver pistol, but the bullets bounced off the impervious door.

After about fifteen minutes of futile attempts, another message appeared in front of Will.

The Mysterious Door is locked, and cannot be opened yet.

The conditions for opening it are currently unknown.

Progress towards opening the door:

0/8

Well. That’s fairly straightforward. Guess I don’t have anything to do here yet. My curiosity is going to kill me though. I think this is the first Space I’ve gotten to that really had nothing for me to do.

With nothing else to do, Will chose a shaded spot to do his business, and moved on.

***

image [https://i.imgur.com/aFK49Uq.jpeg]

Riddle Shrine

Pick one of the offered quest cards.

Again? What the hell is up with my dice rolls?

Will was standing on a circular stage in the middle of what looked like a Greek temple. Complete with white marble columns and naked statues. Will, however, was not in the mood to admire the building. There were three riddle cards hanging in the air in front of him.

This time the cards were red, orange, and blue.

May as well get this over with. I think I’ll go with the orange.

As usual, the unchosen cards vanished when Will made his choice, leaving behind the orange card to flip over and reveal its face.

This time, the picture on the card was of a woman wearing a white chef uniform, complete with hat. Just like before, the image slowly turned three dimensional and walked out of the card.

And just like before, she spoke in rhymes.

“All are welcome who would eat

Plenty is the space to sit

But before you get the meat

It is time to test your wit

Hungry one, to test your stuff

What I ask will not be rough

But if you are up to snuff

You will get from me a buff”

And just like before, it was cringeworthily bad. And just like before, it was followed by the actual riddle.

“Why did the chef pour stew over the Australian possum?”

This time, Will was completely stumped. He knew next to nothing about Australian possums, and for the life of him couldn’t think of any pun regarding their name and stews. After nearly ten minutes of going around in circles, he had to admit that he had no idea how to answer the riddle.

“He was making cuscus!”

Will considered the answer, but even after hearing it, it just made absolutely no sense. Not that it mattered. As soon as she’d finished speaking, the chef took something out of a pocket and sprinkled it over Will, before vanishing without a word.

Will didn’t feel anything different. He knew that there had to be a penalty for failing to answer the riddle though, so he checked his status screen, and found a new entry under the status effects line.

Status effects:

Extra Delicious – 1 cycle remaining

There was no description he could find for the status effect. Shaking his head at the whole encounter, Will rolled his dice. At least the next move would probably get him to the dwarves’ place. He had a lot of shopping to do.