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Marsupoly: A Tale of Dice and Wombat
Chapter 25 - Pain in the Wom-butt

Chapter 25 - Pain in the Wom-butt

Will stayed in the North Arena’s spectator are for a while longer. It was the third time he’d been to one of the arenas, and Jeremy was there again. It looked like someone was taking his supposed rivalry with the overly dramatic, and yet somehow completely self-aware, lizard.

And if the arenas were going to throw the two of them at each other, he wanted to know more about what the lizard was capable of. Which, it turned out, was quite a lot. Jeremy, who’d fought Will twice and lost both battles, was a lot better at traversing the obstacle course than Will would have been.

The lizard jumped around from platform to platform, deftly maneuvered every prop and easily climbing wherever climbing was called for. He even managed to avoid all but one of the paint arrows, and used his shield skill to block the one that did hit.

In the end, it didn’t surprise Will at all to see that Jeremy managed to get to first place in the event. And for some reason, Will found himself happy for his strangely friendly rival.

But with the event over, it was time for Will to move. Bidding the event manager farewell, Will went to a private place where he could roll his dice.

Once again, wombat made plans were foiled by a roll of the dice. Will got the precise roll he’d needed to reach the Space just after Sarlisa and Bob’s place, and once again had chosen to take the full move and skip the merchants.

image [https://i.imgur.com/jY5cSF8.jpeg]

Desert Outskirts

On the eastern edge of the Board lies the Great Desert. The outskirts of this harsh, dry location are home to hardy desert dwelling plants and animals, capable of taking advantage of what little water can be found.

Pale brown and yellow sand stretched all around him, dotted here and there by the occasional cactus. The heat was intense, but felt somehow muted after Will’s experiences with the volcano. Or perhaps it was the Resistance part of Passive Defense which helped reduce the effects of the harsh environment.

High above, large birds flew in circling patterns. Vultures looking for their next meal, Will assumed. He hoped he wouldn’t have to hunt those vultures for his quest. They flew far above the range of any of his skills.

Main quest

Slay 10 Enraged Echinopsis.

Reward:

Space rank-up

50 XP

1 skill shard

What the hell is an Enraged Echinopsis? What the hell is a regular Echinopsis, even? It’s not the vultures, I think. It would have just called them vultures, wouldn’t it?

it turned out that Will didn’t have to wait long for the answer to his question. Unfortunately, the answer turned out to be quite a pain in the wom-butt.

Quite literally, in fact, since Will didn’t even notice anything wrong until a flurry of needles made his backside look like a hedgehog.

Echinopsis, I turns out, is a type of cactus. In fact, it’s the type of cactus most people would instantly associate with the term. A thick flanged trunk, about three meters tall and covered in small needles. About halfway up, a horizontal branch split off, going about half a meter sideways before turning back up and growing another half a meter.

There was also, and Will had absolutely no idea how he’d managed to miss that fact, a very angry looing face glaring at him.

Even as Will watched the cactus, the horizontal branch twisted, bringing its upright end down in Will’s direction. Will, having gotten used to how things on the Board worked, immediately understood what was about to happen, and spun around to turn his face away from the oncoming needle spray.

Which, of course, resulted in the further pin-cushioning of his padded rear end.

Fortunately for Will, that end was armored enough, by nature, that the needles barely caused any actual damage.

Except to his dignity.

With the needle spray over, Will turned to face the Enraged Echinopsis again. For the first time since finding himself wombatized and on the Board, Will had no wish to charge at an enemy. He had a feeling that getting a face full of needles would be extremely unpleasant.

He also had a feeling that the cactus’s arm would be more than capable of melee attacks.

Which left Will with his other default attack method. The trusty Thunder Ball. Two casts of Will’s signature skill were enough to take out the Enraged Echinopsis, and with the cactus quite literally planted in the ground, it didn’t even get a chance to avoid the attack.

The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

It did, however, have enough time to fire a third volley of needles at Will, which the wombat tried to dodge.

“Tried” being the operative word here, since the cactus seemed to be perfectly capable of sweeping its arm sideways to follow its target around. That was the only serious wound Will took in the fight, when one of the needles found a chink in his armor and lodged itself in his shoulder.

With the cactus dead, Will could approach safely and Harvest it, getting a Golden Torch Cactus Fruit for his trouble. Of good quality, naturally.

Finished with his first target, Will looked around himself. There were numerous other cacti within sight of him. Assuming that all of those were Enraged Echinopsises, wrapping up the quest wouldn’t take too long.

Which, of course, meant that not all of the cacti were valid targets. In fact, barely one in five Echinopsises was of the Enraged variety. The rest were nothing more than ordinary cacti.

Even worse was the fact that Will had absolutely no way of knowing which cactus was Enraged and which was just Echinopsis. Not until they attacked, at least. Which they only did once he had his back turned to them, or once he attacked first.

Which meant that Will had to either get a spray of needles in his hiney at the beginning of each battle or waste a Thunder Ball on each and every cactus he came across.

And then, of course, he had to wait until his mana replenished before moving on to the next cactus.

Still, once he knew what he was actually dealing with, fighting the cacti was more of an annoyance than an actual challenge, and Will spent several annoying hours searching for and killing Enraged Echinopsis plants, even after his actual quest was finished.

He’d also, for a moment, considered killing one of the with his acetomancy wand. But even if the cactus could move with him from Space to Space, he didn’t really think that a stationary minion would do him much good, and he might need the wand’s charges for something else.

And, of course, sprinkled among the cacti were the ubiquitous Crankscouts, two of which ended up as part of Will’s trail of cactus carnage.

In this particular Space, the Crankscouts were tall brass pipes, with the occasional patch of green coating and needles to act the part of camouflage. They had the same “arms” as the real cacti, and attacked in a similar way, spraying brass tacks instead of needles.

At the end of the day, Will had twenty Golden Torch Cactus Fruits, most of good quality, one good quality brass cog and one excellent quality brass cog.

And, of course, a skill shard.

Skill shard: Hide

Tier: Basic

Type: Rogue

Level 1

XP 0/100

User is 20% less likely to be noticed whenever actively trying to hide. Skill cannot be used while moving.

Ready or not, here they come!

What is it with all of those Rogue skill shards? I’ve sold the first one I got, but this one makes three out of the set of four!

Somewhat disappointed, Will moved on to the next Space.

***

image [https://i.imgur.com/IVYtuxV.jpeg]

Dungeon Entrance

Available dungeons:

Kili’s Root Cellar (cleared)

Sarlisa’s Garden

The Iron Mines of Westboardia

Cog-nition Cog-nation Scout Ship

Warning: you may only leave a dungeon from the entrance or exit square!

The second dungeon entrance Will found was…

Well, he wanted to say that it was identical to the first one. But there were enough convoluted stairways leading in every conceivable (and several inconceivable) directions that he really couldn’t actually be sure.

He did know that there was no way he could point to any actual differences between the two. In fact, the layout was so otherworldingly confusing, that he’d probably be unable to point at any differences even if both entrances were standing side by side in front of him.

There were, this time, four stairways which were actually accessible. Two of which were the familiar plain wood, downward-leading stairway that led to Kili’s Root Cellar and the brass stairway, still blocked by a gate made of interlocking cogs, that led upwards, presumably into the Cog-nition Cog-nation scout ship.

Will had a feeling that that stairway would only unlock once he’d finished the first part of that quest chain.

The other stairways Will could access were new. Which should have meant that the second dungeon entrance wasn’t actually identical to the first. But somehow, it didn’t. And just thinking about that discrepancy made Will head start to ache, so he abandoned it and turned instead to examine the two new directions.

The first of the new stairways looked like a small hill, with an entrance set at its side. A stone stairway led downwards, with torches burning every few meters to light the way. Approaching the stone mount caused a message to pop up in front of Will.

Dungeon name:

The Iron Mines of Westboardia

Difficulty: easy

Dungeon open.

Which was precisely what Will had been expecting, based on how the structure looked.

The second new stairway was constructed out of wood, painted a clean uniform white. It looked like a small gazebo, with various types of flowering vines climbing on the wooden beams. The stairway itself, instead of going up or down, went somehow sideways, in a direction Will couldn’t name, and hadn’t even imagined before that precise moment in time.

Once again, a message screen appeared in front of him when he approached.

Dungeon name:

Sarlisa’s Garden

Difficulty: easy

Dungeon open.

Quest available!

If these work the same way as Kili’s Root Cellar, finishing this dungeon should take me to Sarlisa and Bob’s place, right? And I’m assuming the iron mines will lead to Kevin’s? Either way, I should probably take the garden dungeon, since I have an active quest for that one. And since I wanted to get to Bob anyway. I’m sure I’ll get the chance to try the other one sooner or later.

Decision made, Will entered the gazebo, and stepped on the first of the weirdly directioned steps.