The next room had another rutstabaga in the center. This one was pinker than the one in the first room, and its leaves had a darker green, slightly rotten look. There was also a slight vinegar scent in the air.

Seeing the flying vegetable, Will prepared himself for another long session of dodging the dive-bombing vegetable and tearing off its flight leaves.

The fight was going a lot better than his first rutstabaga fight, but after the first couple of passes, Will got stabbed in the back by a potanto, which must have been hiding in a crate. The distraction of the potanto attack also meant that Will failed to dodge the rustabaga and received yet another nasty wound on his back.

Fortunately for Will, the rustabaga was slow to climb by that point, having already lost some leaves, and Will had time to savage the potanto before he needed to worry about another aerial attack. The potanto still got another hit in when Will was busy dodging the flying vegetable, but was dead before it got a chance to attack for the third time.

After that, finishing off the rutstabaga was easy. Will took the time to heal and harvest the bodies before moving on, and noticed that the drops were slightly different from the previous ones.

1 pickled potanto tuber (average)

1 pickled rutstabaga root (average)

The fourth room looked just as empty as the second, but the smell of vinegar was even stronger than in the previous room.

Will, however, was aware of the fact that the potantoes liked to hide in the crates, and was careful not to turn his back on them for longer than absolutely necessary.

A precaution which turned out to be very much justified, since there were not one, but two potantoes in the room, each one hiding in a different crate.

Without the benefit of a surprise attack, or the greater threat of a rutstabaga, dealing with potantoes wasn’t much of a problem, and Will managed to get out of the fight without adding any more wounds to his collection.

He did notice that the potantoes were paler than the first one he’d seen. And the loot was, once again, pickled.

The fifth room had two rutstabagas.

Or, to be more precise, one completely pickled rutstabaga and one brass clockwork contraption that looked a little bit like a rutstabaga.

It even had one leaf that would have passed for a real leaf, as evidence of the increasing camouflage abilities of the crankscouts.

Fighting two rutstabagas was, somehow, even easier than fighting just the one. The two didn’t seem to have any coordination between them, which led to them trying to attack Will at the same time, resulting in the leaves of the real rutstabaga hitting the metallic rotor of the crankscout.

Which shredded the leaves of the first, and tangled the rotor of the second. And once both enemies have been grounded, Will had very little problem finishing them off.

I really hope I don’t have to fight a series of rooms with three enemies in each next, Will grumbled, before harvesting the rutstabaga and searching the remains of the crankscout for anything useful. No shard on this one. But I guess that makes sense. It didn’t seem to have a special attack like the last one.

The sixth room was different.

For one, there was a staircase leading up instead of a door on the opposite wall. For another, the crates lining the walls weren’t empty. Instead, they were filled with piles of root vegetables in what Will’s nose told him were various stages of composting.

Finally, there was a large head of garlic floating in the middle of the room. Half a meter in diameter, each of its cloves were the size of a two-liter bottle, and yet shrunken and looking soft with age, the skin covering them yellowed and blochy.

The smell of rot and vinegar filled the room. The smell was an almost physical barrier blocking Will from entering the room. But the way back was still blocked, and the stairs ahead promised the only chance at an exit Will had seen since he’d entered the dungeon.

The door slammed closed behind him as soon as he’d gotten far enough away from it.

“Ssssoooo,” came a dry, crackling voice. It was the voice of dry leaves being crumbled, and yet somehow it was perfectly understandable. “You are the one who hassss been killing my precioussss picklessss.”

The garlic, which Will guessed was the room’s resident enemy, was floating too high for Will to reach, leaving him with no choice except to listen.

Please tell me you aren’t going to monologue!

“For ninety daysssss I have fermented! For sssseven more dayssss I have spread vinegar, sssslowly pickling the root vegetablessss, and just assss I wassss ready, you came and dessstroyed them! You will regret raisssssing the wrath of Valkosssssipuli, The Black Garlich!”

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

The Black Garlich? Really?

Undeterred by Will’s disdain, the garlich finished its monologue and descended, until it was hovering barely half a meter above the ground. Will started to charge, but a circle of black vines materialized to the side of his enemy, and a stream of green liquid shot out at him, forcing him to abort his charge and dodge.

The stream lasted for a few seconds before the black circle vanished, cutting it off.

Will charged again, and this time he managed to hit the garlich. The garlich’s cloves were soft and squishy, but the thing was completely immovable. It was the first time that Unstoppable Force didn’t bowl over his target, and the surprised wombat stayed in place next to the giant vegetable for just a second too long.

A stream of green liquid struck Will’s face, releasing the sharp smell of vinegar and causing him an intense, burning pain.

Screaming in pain, Will staggered back and away from the garlich, trying to wipe away the burning liquid. A third stream of vinegary acid launched at him, and Will barely jumped away in time.

Standing as far away from his enemy as possible, Will used his healing skill. The pain instantly lessened, but was still far from gone.

That was just nasty. But it looks like I’ve got a few seconds between each shot. I can probably use it to attack, but I’ll need to be quick.

Will waited until the next stream of acid, and charged in to attack. More prepared this time, he didn’t linger. Instead, he swiped at the garlich with his claws, and then immediately back away, dodging another stream of acid.

Will could see where his claws pierced the garlich’s skin, and the black flesh of the cloves inside, and he charged back in for another attack.

Once again, Will backed away after a couple of claw swipes, ready to dodge another stream of vinegar. This time, however, the black circle was noticeably larger, appeared above the garlich, and it sprayed the vinegar directly upwards. Within seconds, drop of the acidic liquid were falling all over the room, including on Will’s back.

The acid rain was over within seconds, but the pain lingered.

Goddamn it! Will cursed, staying away from the garlich. He tried using his healing skill again, but the wound was marked as Minor, and beyond the skill’s ability to heal. I really can’t afford to get hit by that thing!

Five seconds after the acid rain ended, the garlich launched another stream of acid directly at Will, which the wombat easily avoided. Still cautious, Will circled the garlich, far enough away to dodge the acid streams.

He counted four more streams of acid before another large circle appeared above the garlich. Will had enough time to run under the stairs before the acid rain started again, and managed to completely avoid it.

Five streams and then rain again? Does this thing have a set attack pattern?

A quick check showed Will that he was down to forty health, and the wombat chose to stay away and avoid the attacks, to see if the pattern really held.

Five streams and one rain later, Will was sure that he was right.

So I charge and attack between the streams, and then run to the stairs when it’s the rain attack.

Knowing the garlich’s attack pattern, it became almost trivial to charge in, attack with his claws, and move back away before the next attack, and Will managed to avoid the monster’s attacks for two whole rotations, while dealing minor seaming damage to the garlich.

Halfway through the third pattern, things changed.

“Enough!” The garlich shouted, and hovered up above Will’s reach. “You may have sssslain my precioussss picklessss, but my armiessss of the Unpresssserved are endlessss!”

Four of the garlich’s cloves fell away from the head, each one dropping into a different crate of composting vegetables, fading into black mist and soaking into the piles.

Two half rotten rutstabagas rose up from two of the crates, and hovered up to either side of the garlich.

And I bet there are potantoes waiting in the other two, waiting for me to be distracted.

Will backed away to the corner of the room, waiting for the flying undead vegetables to attack.

I really wish I had a fireball skill, or something. Anything that I can use at range.

Predictably, the unpreserved rutstabagas dive bombed him together.

And predictably, their rotor leaves got entangled, and they fell to the ground, letting Will charge and attack them.

And just as predictably, as soon as he was busy with the rutstabagas, Will noticed the potantoes creeping up against the wall.

Choosing to abandon the rutstabagas, Will changed direction and charged at one of the potantoes.

He’d run out of stamina during the first part of the fight, so Unstoppable Force (and Slow) didn’t activate. But the unpreserved potanto was slower than the fresh ones, and Will had no trouble hitting it. It was also more fragile than its living brethren, and Will managed to dispatch it before the other potanto could reach him.

“Aaargh!” Green, vine shaped lightning shot from the re-dead potanto, striking the garlich, exactly where one of its missing cloves should have been, causing the hovering monster to shout in pain.

By that point, however, the rutstabagas had managed to get separated and were once again hovering upwards to prepare for another attack.

Will dashed back to his corner, and repeated the whole process, killing the second potanto, and then again for the rutstabagas.

With each unpreserved death, the garlich was hit by another green vine-lightning, each one striking at a different missing clove.

“Nooooo!” Shouted the garlich when the last of the rutstabagas was down. “I will not be defeated!”

The garlich descended to the ground again, and Will returned to his corner, waiting to see what the next phase of the fight would bring.

He didn’t have to wait long before another clove detached itself from the monster, this one launched in an arc aimed at Will. The wombat managed to avoid a direct hit, but the clove burst into black mist, which Will wasn’t fast enough to completely avoid.

The smell of garlic and vinegar surrounded Will, burning his eyes, nose and throat. He managed to stumble out of the cloud, coughing violently, just in time for another clove to attack. Rather than try to dodge again, Will charged at the garlich itself, leaving the black mist cloud behind him.

He’d managed to land some more claw swipes on the garlich, and even completely destroy another clove, before one of the remaining cloves exploded into the black mist, forcing him to retreat, coughing and choking.

By the time he could see properly again, the mist was gone, and another of the cloves was taking off, leaving the garlich with a mere six more.

Once again, Will charged in, managing to avoid the mist cloud and destroy another clove. He was still caught in the next detonation and stumbled away from the garlich.

By the third repetition, the garlich was down to its last clove, and Will managed to dart in one last time, striking at the monster, only to collapse in exhaustion as soon as he saw the message that his enemy was dead.