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Mania: The Beginning of All
Premonition, Premature? (2)

Premonition, Premature? (2)

I woke up on my bed alone with a note on top of my chest. She seriously wrote a whole letter and put it in an envelope just because she had to go somewhere? I was ready to tear open the envelope, but just as I grabbed at the corner of it, I noticed the pattern of the envelope. It was a light pink with darker pink colored hearts on it. She always kept this envelope on the front of her bed. Every time I walked into her room I would see it just lying there, and the one time I asked her about it all she said was that someone who she loved gave it to her. She used an envelope that was close to her heart for a letter just because she was going somewhere else? What did it mean? Did this letter have something worth a lot in it? Did she write her feelings for me in it? I took a wooden knife that was on the floor in the corner of my room and used it to carefully open the envelope. It wasn't stuck to itself, so as soon as I lifted part of the seal I could lift the rest of it with my hand, and I quickly opened the paper that was neatly folded and placed inside the envelope.

Good morning,

Actually, it might be evening right now. I woke up and the sun wasn't right above me. You were asleep and I didn't want to wake you up, so I just slowly got off you. You made some sort of noise when I started to walk away, I wondered if I had woken you up. I'm wasting space, so anyways, I'm leaving to go get something for us to eat tonight. Chef Lince still owes me for chasing Reynold away from him that one time so I'm going to ask him if he'll make me a fancy meal.

Love you,

Elle

"Love you. Huh."

How long had it been since someone had told me that they loved me? Well, she didn't tell me, she wrote it to me, but that's gotta mean something. Maybe I should ask her to tell me that she loves me when she gets back.

No, that's stupid. That's very stupid. That's the kind of thing that makes people feel unsafe around you, makes them feel like they have to act a certain way. Was she only doing this because she felt bad for me? She heard that some random kid was always getting expelled from schools, bullied, made fun of, and she thought that he needed someone to be with. Was she doing this for me?

What if she was lying?

No, that was also stupid. Why was I thinking about this? Was it because of the kiss? I mean I had hoped that she would come back towards me instead of running away but I didn't expect her to kiss me. She kissed me. Why did she kiss me? She could've hugged me. She could've just walked back into my room and talked with me about how mad she was, talked about how I had abandoned her. Why did she kiss me? I asked myself that question again and again, I couldn't understand why. If our places were switched, would I have kissed her? Would I even be there if I were in her place? Maybe I would've run away to the forest and she wouldn't be able to catch me.

Maybe if she were in my place, she wouldn't lock me out of her room for a month. Maybe in her nightmare I would survive and run away, and she wouldn't feel guilty.

I don't know. I don't know anything. I don't know what I've done to deserve her feeling this way about me. I don't know why she came back to my door every day. I don't know why she cared. I don't know why she's using a favor from Chef Lince to get us a nice meal when she could probably feed herself for a week, maybe a month. I don't know why she used an envelope from someone who once loved her just to say that she loved me.

I don't get it. I don't think I can get it.

Does she think that I've done something for her that means as much as what she's doing for me? What, talking with her every day in class? Helping her with work, eating lunch with her, and spending time with her. Do all of these things mean the same as telling someone that you love them? Do all of them have something to do with love?

She was right, it was evening. The people at the orphanage were going around to each room making sure that we were back in time for curfew, and just as they opened her door I heard her voice from the hallways.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

"I'm here! I'm not late! I had to do something but I'm here!"

I heard her running down the hallway and I saw her slip past the adults at the orphanage and place the things she was holding down on her bed. I saw the other people back away as Miss Larche walked into her room. She was holding her right wrist in her left hand, but she turned her back to me as she was talking to Elle.

"Might I ask what you have brought with you to this orphanage?"

"I have brought offerings for Phrosus."

Miss Larche paused a second. She didn't sound actually interested in what Elle had, more like she was just saying things. I don't know, it seemed like she was reading something out loud, like someone was telling her what to say.

"You've been praying quite often lately. Have you received whatever you have given so much to ask for?"

"I have, Miss Larche. I wanted to offer this to him as thanks for all he has done for me."

Miss Larche turned around and looked at me for a few seconds. Her eyes were half closed, and she just stood there silently watching me. I wasn't moving at all. We both stood there. Sat there? Sat and stood there for a few seconds just looking at each other before she slowly turned around again to look at Elle.

"Well, I'm sure Phrosus is very appreciative of your penance."

She turned away again and walked down the hallway back to her room. Elle looked at me for a second before beginning to grin as she opened up the bag she had with her. How did she even get that much food? She said she would only get a meal from him but that looked like enough to feed everyone at a banquet. It looked like the kind of food Reynold would bring with him for lunch, but there was so much more than I thought there would be. The other adults came by and closed our doors. After they had closed mine I went and got the candle from underneath my bed.

The two rocks. Where were the two rocks? Every time I wanted to light a candle they were right there in the corner of my room. Did the adults come and take them? When? They were there for the whole month that I had shut myself in here. Who could have come and taken them? Did they come while I was asleep? How was I going to eat with Elle? Where would she keep the food if we couldn't see well enough to enjoy it? I couldn't just find rocks like those anywhere.

I was searching around the floor with my arms and legs everywhere that I could without making any noise. Eventually, I gave up and lied back down on my bed. I'd have to tell Elle that we would need to find some other way. Maybe I would have to tell her that she should give the food back to Chef Lince. I'm an idiot. All I had to do was keep the things that were in my room the entire time that I was locking myself in here close by and I couldn't even do that. What would she think? She went out and used a favor of hers just so we could eat together and now we wouldn't even be able to do that. What would she think? Would we start out whatever this is with her unhappy, with her thinking about how I let her down?

I heard my door slowly creak open and just as I prepared to mumble to her that I couldn't find the two stones I heard the sound that they made coming from where she was. She closed the door behind her and I just sat there for a few seconds before talking.

"You had them the whole time? I thought I lost them!"

I whispered as loud as I could without being heard.

"I wanted to get them out of your room because the door was open. The other people told me that they saw us on your bed together, so if the door was closed they'd probably open it and find them."

"I didn't know you were that smart."

"I brought you food and saved your rocks, you really want to tease me right now?"

"I'm sorry, I just- I'm sorry."

She picked the candle up off my bed and I opened the window so she could go outside. She ran with the candle and rocks far away into the field and I heard the rocks bang together. She walked back slowly with the rocks and candle and handed me the candle while she climbed back in through the open window. I got off the bed and placed the candle on the floor in front of it.

I was waiting for her to take the food out of the bag while I was sitting on the floor, but she just stood there and stared at me. After a few seconds of just staring at each other, she walked towards me and knelt down as she wiped her finger across my cheek.

"Hey, it's alright. I'm not mad at you for teasing me."

"What are you doing? I know that."

"Celio, you're crying."

I was? I couldn't tell before, but now I felt tears rolling down my face. Why was I crying? Was I upset because I thought I had lost the rocks? No. She had them, it wasn't an issue. Why was I crying?

I couldn't get it. She did all of this for me, she lied to Ms. Larche, she defended me to Reynold, and she got food from Chef Lince. Why was she doing this for me? What had I done for her? Why am I able to sit here and enjoy a meal that nobles get?

I couldn't take it anymore, and I started crying uncontrollably. She leaned against the wall with her arms open, and I held her tightly again with my face on her shoulder. I felt the tears leave my face and drop onto her clothes. I had to get up, I couldn't be doing one more thing to hurt her. I tried to move but she wouldn't let me. She was pulling me closer to her, and my arms were already wrapped around her.

I sat there in an odd position and cried until I couldn't make any more tears, and she sat there in an odd position with me.

What have I done in my life to deserve this?