I wake up feeling well rested and ready to face the day with a smile. Immediately I check the cheese situation and can't help but grin.

Dairy has laid another “egg” – this one larger and much goopier than the last. I blame all the swimming Dairy did yesterday. Too much water! Can’t be good for smol slimes. The slime himself is not down here – disappeared to do whatever he does during the day – but that’s fine. I think I slept in anyways.

My prize is the size of my fist if it were squished and made of cheese. I nibble a bit and nod appreciatively. This will be a good start to my amazing day.

Checking the market, I navigate to its sad produce selection and buy some more sandy bread. It doesn’t taste the best but it make for a great base.

Wouldn’t it be mortifying if turned out this wasn’t bread?

I shiver. Happy thoughts. This is bread.

Slicing myself off two pieces I carefully place my cheese in-between the slices and squeeze out some of the juice. There we go. Would be good with some vegetables but my peas aren’t ready yet and I haven’t planted more regular produce. So much I have to do still.

You know what? I think this bread is growing on me. I drowned it out in cheese and it's not bad at all. Filling. Healthy tasting.

Gnawing on my sandwich, I start to wander my property noting how familiar and yet new everything still feels. You know. I could probably sell this cheese – I’ll have to if I get sick of it – but for now it’s the only part of my diet I’m not buying. I’m sure Dairy would prefer I appreciate it than gift it away anyways.

Maybe if production increases?

Yo, this would taste even better if I could grill it. Like grilled cheese. Oh! Next time I’ll try that. Make a little campfire and pretend I’m camping.

Dairy is hiding in the lake. I pretend I can’t see him stalking fishes and continue on my patrol of the property. Nothing out of the ordinary. Even my fallen tree from last night seems less sad in the morning. I think yesterday was just one of those days you know?

I return to the store and begin hunting for chocolate.

Checking through I find there is even less snacks and deserts than there is food.

Like if this is a corner store, then in this store there’s a literal corner with a single cardboard box filled with muffins and chips.

There is something that looks a lot like chocolate but it’s called ‘sweetened charcoal’ which…well it just sounds like sugar and burnt wood doesn’t it?

…it looks like chocolate so I’m going to buy it. There we go, 17 monies down the drain.

Unpeeling my self-treat, I take a single solitary bite before noticing the third party. My space has been breached! My sanctum invaded. Sound the alarm!

Across from me – sitting on the corner of my status sign and looking at me with bloodshot eyes is what I can only call a garden gnome.

…he looks rabid.

I carefully take a bite – only now tasting the slightly nutty flavour as it spreads across my tongue. This “sweetened charcoal” is ever so slightly caramel tinted ever so slightly chocolate spiked, ever so slightly sawdust textured. Its not chocolate but It will do.

The gnome licks his lips and stays back.

Carefully I bite off a tiny chunk and place it in my hands.

This is a dumb idea, isn’t it? How did they get here? Shouldn’t I be safe from anything weaker than a dragon? No, the goddess mentioned something about keeping “them” out. Is this one of them? I’m going to move forward assuming it is. She seemed to think they are harmless.

I carefully give the gnome the tiny chunk of my precious treat and watch as he scarfs it down in less than a second.

“Shu Shu shu,” the gnome begins to giggle his pupils dilating. Oh no! I recognize those eyes. A predator! A predator for my sweetened charcoal!

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…maybe if I give him more he’ll leave me alone? Carefully I bite off a second chunk and slide it over to the creature – suddenly realizing I left a smear on my nice clean iPad screen.

What am I doing?

It’s too late, the gnome has already eaten the second bite and has just begun to lick every trace of the smeared sweet off my screen. That can’t be sanitary.

“shu shu shu, Sugar!” the gnome giggles to himself in a high pitched tone.

He then taps my screen a bunch seeming disappointed nothing is happening for him.

Realizing he can’t use the screen, the gnome loses interest immediately and turns to look at me.

“Sugar sugar sugar?” the gnome speaks – his eyes no longer bloodshot just incredibly dilated.

I really don’t know how much sugar is even in this bar… it's not very sweet. Should I see about buying real sugar?

…this is a bad idea isn’t it? Someone tell me no…three two one okay I’m doing it! You can’t stop me now mwahaha!

Carefully I navigate to the normal store and find bulk produce – they do in fact sell sugar by the 0.23kgs.

Buying a sack, I pull it out of the inventory noticing how the gnome looks like he wants to jump me.

Carefully I take a handful and shove the bag back into my inventory in a single fluid motion.

Not today beast!

The gnome's eyes track me. I hold up a finger and stare. There we go. He’s sitting down cross legged. What a well trained gnome – placing the pile of sugar on the screen – I need to buy an actual table my tablet is not for food – I stand back and watch.

Shrieking with glee as soon as I give the go ahead Mr Gnome leaps forward in a literal blur. In seconds the creature snorts the entire pile of sugar – yes snorts it. He then shakes and falls off the sign giggling wildly – his arms spinning.

Mr gnome lands on the ground head first, his arms sprayed like something from a slapstick movie. I gasp slightly hoping Mr Gnome is okay. The creature rolls over and stares up at the sky. I laugh in relief as soon as I realize he’s fine.

…”what do I do with you?” I ask smiling down at the creature as he roles back and forth his body blurring with each spin.

“Sugar sugar” the gnome giggles sniffing a few times to get the last of the sucrose off his lip.

…I think…I think I’m feeding an addict?

…

I stare down at the coked-up fairy lost as to what to do next.

I don’t really know what led me to feeding him. I really don’t. In the moment it was the only thing I could think of doing – each bit sort of…led into the next or something.

Now that I’ve done it of course I kind of regret it. The amount of sugar I gave him was really not that expensive and I’m sure I’ll be glad to have it when I start being able to cook better – you know instead of just buying takeout every day like a college student.

But I don’t want to be in charge of feeding him constantly you know? I’m not up for owning a little clay man as a pet – oh heck that sounds like slavery. Back up. Back up.

…I promise I’m not thinking of slavery when I bend down and poke the gnome.

“Hey there…can you talk?”

“Shu shu shu, sugar” the gnome nods with glazed eyes wiggling them aggressively at the end.

…it might be creepy if he didn’t look so funny – he wasn’t even staring straight at me. His eyes are drifting through the sky. What do you see little guy?

“Are you…okay?” I ask prodding him once again.

He continues to stare blankly at the sky for a minute before flipping over and standing up. The gnome sways for a bit and then as if being kicked into action starts running about a faint giggle following him around. “Shu shu shu” he laughs disappearing over the horizon and arriving again from a different direction.

He runs faster and faster till he’s basically a streak – He climbs up the sign and licks it once again…he runs off into the forest and comes back swinging a stick…he runs off and comes back wet presumably from the lake…he does some childish things I will not be repeating…he climbs up my leg and jumps off my waist – his little boots softer than you would expect…he tries to build a teepee with my sticks and some grass then gets bored.

Finally he slows down and stands before me looking less confused but more hyper. Closer to how he originally appeared but without the bloodshot eyes and with more…energy? I can see him bouncing on the balls of his feet his face bluring ever so slightly with how fast he’s bobbing.

I really don’t know what to do so I bring my hands together and start clapping.

Is this the correct response? Who knows. Interacting with others is hard okay?

The gnome bows jerking up and down repeatedly. Ha! I'm great at picking the best of options.

Then as if hoping I’ll give him more he twists into a bent over position and stares up at me from between his legs.

“Shu…shuuugaar?” he asks like a schoolboy asking for candy. His relatively big eyes blink up at my like a hopeful puppy dog. His shiny ceramic looking body glints as he fidgets back and forth.

I really have to shut this down before it gets too bad don’t I? But if I just say no…but if I do this….this isn’t slavery this is an employment contract. That’s it. A give and take.

“I can give you more sugar but not for free” I start my office pitch.

The gnomes eyes light up. I’m pretty sure he just heard the “give” and “sugar”.

Reaching out I pull out the bag of sugar then grab a pinch before shoving it back quickly.

The gnome looks normal-ish but his eyes still track my hand almost hypnotically.

I start spinning it around as I talk watching his head role around and around.

“For now if you make sure to water my garden and pick out any weeds you see I’ll give you sugar…twice a day.

The gnome nods enthusiastically. Does he know how much a day is?

“I’ll give you this now to start you off and then I’m going to try and cut up a tree okay? If you want to help me I might be inclined to give you more sugar afterwards.” I say carefully gluing two pieces of grass together and filling it with my pinch of sugar.

It looks like a little bowl the size of a cup in his hands as he holds it licking up all the grains.

…am I a bad person for taking advantage of an addict?

I think…I think this isn’t a fun train of thought so I’m going to stop. Smack. Gone! To ashes! Today is going to be a great day!

Let’s go chop up a pesky tree!