Lina went through Life as if it was a funeral. Every single day she wore a body bag - black dresses and muted tones were unmistakingly the colours of her soul. Of course, to many onlookers, these aesthetic choices might have given the wrong impression. But no, Lina did not consciously seek to create an expensive-looking, classy image - her choices of fashion were merely reflections of the sadness and despair within.

No doubt, she enjoyed the elegance and mystery pertaining to it, however, it was not the reason - merely a very welcome side effect - why life got painted in dark.

Every day was a Void. Breaking dawn dispersed the dark mantles of the night, yet it also brought new struggles. Silence continuously screamed at her whilst Lina climbed towards the top of Life Mountain. Resilient and patient she took knives out of her back - one after the other - and continued climbing.

Good things only ever come through blood, sweat and tears - nothing worth having ever comes easy - Lina was convinced.

Standing alone against the world was a burden. But it was one she chose and was happy to accept. Our heroine was ready to do everything and anything as long as it aligned with her values and beliefs. Her goal - no, her Dream - was simply bigger than her. Greater than anything else. And even though it consumed the very essence of Lina’s being, she climbed her mountain nevertheless.

Every day was her last, and thus there was no place for regrets or could-have beens. Lina only ever knew how to accept - I know this was stupid, yet I’m happy I did it nevertheless. She was someone who preferred to regret silly mistakes in the landscape of her entire Life, rather than wondering what and how it could have been if she had taken her leaps of faith. Or, well, sometimes dived head-first only to wonder if the parachute was included in the package when signing up for the aeroplane jump…

Regrets meant nothing. If anything, they made Lina bolder and even stronger. She walked through her Purgatory of a Life refusing to be trapped in Labyrinths of overthinking, underestimating herself, feeling lonely, upset or pathetic. She was a bulldozer tearing the hedges down and running across the maze - barefoot, laughing, with a healthy dose of craziness in her eyes.

Now, you might wonder how and why a strong - seemingly strong - person like that could have possibly ended up like this?

Fate enjoys a good game of chess. And while many travel through their boards of soldiers and horses whilst clinging to rebellion and hope, the Tower is bound to fall. And inevitably, changes - or demise - will sink in along with the rubble. Seeping in through the cracks. Slithering, slithering…

Fate enjoys chess, but who said it ever played fairly? Fate does not know defeat.

*

The Void sucked her in and as consciousness slipped away, Lina felt relieved. The agony, the screaming silence, the breath painfully leaving her lungs and crushing - what an excruciating pain! - her heart - it all abandoned what was left of Lina.

Was she still here or already there? She felt as if she was Nowhere and Everywhere - a strange, yet familiar omnipotence filled her soul as grievances washed away in the waves of Light and Thunder.

There was no river, no boat - tales of humans crossing to the Afterlife flashed through her mind. It was but a Void - a fine mixture of particles - cold and hot - gushing by in an odd storm and mixing with her being.

Was it bright or was it dark? Or, by any chance, was it colourful? Lina couldn’t tell. Explosions of gas and matter, fractures of something once dear yet bound to be forgotten - Lina couldn’t quite put her finger on it, yet instinctively understood: Life, as she knew, is finally over. But if this is Life no more, what - or where? - is it?

“And what does that make me?” - she heard herself mutter as her voice got swallowed by the hungry abyss.

Sometimes the End is a Beginning. And some Beginnings are those of the End. But what if some beginnings never ended?

I am Nothing, therefore I am Everything. Because I consist of Nothing, I can become Anything. There is Nothing more than Anything.

*

Energies charged and stars exploded. Those who were meant to leave were also meant to return. The Void concentrated all sources of Light and Dark, the sleepwalking soul had been successfully refined. The pain was no more, yet worldly attachments still lingered - bulldozers are known not to let go easily…

Lightning and Thunder came to subside whilst a sensation - long forgotten - steeped into her bones: hard and cold.

Hard and cold, cold and hard - how welcome! - a solid rock was causing discomfort to the ribcage, lower back and heels. Lina wasn’t sure if it was a hallucination or some sort of wishful - or remorseful - thinking, reminding her of the pains - or rather the joys - of Life. Was it haunting her?

“Life is haunting me,” she scoffed at the thought, only to be surprised by the sound of her voice. A voice, not necessarily hers, though she wasn’t - she couldn’t be - sure. A voice. A sound.

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The Void deprived Lina of her own noises. It was but a continuous orchestra of explosions - lightning and thunder… Not a single cry or a scream of despair could leave her constrained body - or being.

The Void was no longer. She was able to escape the oblivion. In some shape or form she was yet alive - how uncalled for, how unexpected… Yet how incredibly precious.

“Is this Life?” she muttered again and words splashed into the air, wrapping around her and penetrating the depths of what - she believed - was lost.

Something warm ran through Lina’s cheeks. A distant memory of emotion - supposedly joy - touched her cold heart as she attempted to feel her limbs and possibly move her hand towards what she expected to be her face. Nothing happened - just the cold stone piercing her from within.

Did I become a vegetable? - thoughts started rushing through Lina’s mind. Did someone have the audacity to save me? Was I - am I - in a coma? - at this point, Lina was starting to panic as her body - it was her body, wasn’t it? - refused to budge.

Did I die and get reincarnated into a bloody Puntukas? - the ridiculous thought of becoming an enormous stone was ironic, yet scary enough to raise proper panic. Why can’t I see anything? - she thought. Where is this? - a waterfall of emotions washed over Lina.

“If you are to pull through this, I would strongly recommend calming down,” - a shock wave ran through her body. “If you can’t calm yourself down, you are bound to have a heart attack and die - in vain, I must add - once again at this rate,” a warm, yet unmistakenly demanding male voice commanded me as something - I would guess a palm of their hand - landed on my forehead.

“Pabusk,” an unknown tongue was spoken upon me whilst a mixture of warm joy and boiling panic ran through my existence - or what was remaining of it. And somehow I knew the voice invited me to awaken, called upon me, and brought back some sort of Light, Life and Meaning.

“...so mote it be,” upon the last breath of his words - never-ending chants and comforting warmth gently caressing this stone-cold existence and wrapping around it, nourishing, elevating - it all suddenly made sense.

I found my eyes.

*

Lina woke up to an endless sky of stars. In the maze of shadows and unknown surroundings, she found herself blinded by the platinum moonlight. I’ve missed that - she thought to herself whilst greedily inhaling fresh pines and late summer airs. The bones still seemed cold and she barely felt her legs, hands or any of the fingertips. Gazing at the Void of her sky was the most she could do, but it was enough to feel grateful.

At this point, she had completely lost track of time, yet was conscious of her existence that did not end - or for whatever reason could not end. This - whatever it is - is another form of being - she thought to herself.

“Let’s cherish the moment,” Lina said out loud.

“I’m glad to hear that,” an almost familiar voice responded making Lina jump - as much as someone stone-paralysed could attempt. Her puzzled face came down to a realisation that a strange force or body - possibly the palm of someone’s hand - was still leisurely - was it? - resting on her forehead.

A pale face with ocean blue eyes came into her field of vision as long silky hair - threads of gold - cascaded over the shoulders of what seemed to be a young man, possibly in his thirties. The moon adorned his transcendent beauty and it was close to impossible to gaze elsewhere. I sure hope he is naive enough to believe I’m too stiff to turn away and not just idiotically staring whilst completely mesmerised - she thought.

To Lina’s horror, her cheeks turned red and she felt a warm sensation running up her neck, reaching the face and tingling the earlobes. This is too embarrassing, I need to get the hell away from him - desperation ran a whole marathon through her mind.

Seconds later, Lina found herself flying - no, falling off! - some sort of an unstable platform and digging her nose into the cold grass sprinkled with fresh fresh dew.

This further embarrassment kicked her to the bones and Lina immediately found the axis of a body once forgotten. As Lina - almost gracefully - jumped up to straighten her back, she took in whatever surroundings could be captured in this moonlight forest - or what it seemed to be.

An amused face - almost familiar - stared at her. Hot flushes - of adoration and repeated embarrassment - rushed through her as blue eyes pierced into her heart. Or soul. Or whatever she had now.

The godly being snickered as his gaze - obviously entertained - continued to evaluate. She chose to take a moment and observe the environment, yet could barely look away from this tall figure, clothed in odd long robes and adorned by gorgeous belts and knots. Even whilst sat, he seemed awfully tall and despite emitting warm calmness - somehow dangerous.

As her eyes finally adjusted to the night, the cold stone this man sat upon - and she miserably threw herself off just seconds ago - came into vision. And what hell of a stone it was!.. Not even close. As Lina felt the panic once again rushing to her temples, her blood boiled and froze simultaneously. Her heart - oh, poor heart! - sank to the feet as the stone, no, unmistakenly, an Altar, revealed itself.

Still amused, he continued observing Lina’s behaviours. How adorably human - he thought to himself. Every panicky glance and hot flush made him giggle. Before he knew it, his lips curled into a naughty grin. Not malicious, no, but the type of a grin a parent has when their cute newborn discovers the fluffy tail of a cat and seconds later grabs it - only to be smacked and hissed at. Unexpected, with no harm, yet pure confusion and curiosity mixed with cautiousness. He found it adorable and cute. And most of all, he found it entertaining. In his book, “entertaining” was quite something.

Whilst contemplating if to indulge further in this little play or if mercy should be shown, he realised the soul had already drifted from the Altar. She was wandering around the surrounding pillars, curiously exploring - possibly accepting? - and taking in all the rich surroundings.

This is going to be a lot of fun - he thought to himself gracefully slipping off the Altar and following in her confused footsteps.

“Welcome to Hiraeth, Deidre,” she suddenly heard from behind her.

As her perplexed eyes met his gaze, further words echoed through the night air, “From now on, you are Deidre Oleander. I welcome you to Hiraeth”.