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Liber Nominum Universalia
Chapter 14: Neither Within, Nor Without

Chapter 14: Neither Within, Nor Without

Ayumu lay on his back, staring blankly at the ceiling. While he had been telling people that he was fine and that the lethargy was gone, the first thing he did after returning to his room after dinner was collapse into his bed. Granted, he didn’t believe that it was because of physical exhaustion, but...

As for Tomos, he had left him alone to do… something outside. He briefly considered just letting him stay inside his shadow, since it was easy to forget that he was there while he was out of sight, but Ayumu was certain that it would be harder to relax for him. After all, he would know in the back of his mind that the cat was still there, able to observe him in some way.

For now, he just basked in the sense of solitude, letting the tension in his mind and body ebb away. A part of him sneered at how pathetic that sounded even without being said aloud, but he silenced that voice and pushed it away. He couldn’t help the exhaustion which came with not being alone, so it was pointless feeling sorry or derisive of himself. If only could stop berating himself for his other traits too.

Now that his brain didn’t feel full of errant anxieties, Ayumu had the chance to really investigate this newly-discovered aspect of his body. Ayumu closed his eyes, trying to pinpoint what felt ‘off’ about his... ‘Subtle Body’, as Tomos called it.

It wasn’t as easy as he had hoped. He was already bad at pinpointing anything not obviously wrong with his actual body, but trying to detect what was wrong with a part of him he was barely aware of felt almost impossible.

Ayumu recalled Tomos instructing him in a sort of exercise before leaving, saying that it helped with getting a better understanding of one’s Subtle Body and how it differed from the physical body. It might be the best time to try it, considering his relatively clear headspace. Not to mention, he didn’t have the motivation to do anything else.

He placed the palms of his hand on top of one another with his dominant hand directly on top of his chest. He made sure he could feel his heartbeats on his palm before closing his eyes.

He took a deep breath and held the air inside his lungs for a few seconds, trying to relax as much as possible, and then slowly exhaled. He repeated this process while keeping track of the number of times he exhaled after an inhale, and emptied his head of any errant thoughts.

The latter was easier said than done. Ayumu had a very noisy mind and he didn’t remember whether he had ever been able to completely silence his thoughts outside of sleep. But he persevered, and after a few minutes, his mind felt clearer and the chatter of scattered thoughts softened to the point they could be ignored.

He found that keeping his thoughts towards the sound of his breaths helped him in that regard.

When he was confident that he wouldn’t lose concentration, he moved on to the next step- trying to flex all of the muscles he could, ideally starting from his head or his toes and moving down or up in order based on where he started.

He began at his toes and soles of his feet. He tried his best not to lose the thread of the breathing part of the exercise in the process. He slowly moved up, not really understanding what he was looking for and reached his abdomen shortly.

He was almost interrupted when he felt… something. Maybe the feeling was always there, but his desperate attempts to flex the muscles around his abdomen and stomach made the contrasting feeling easier to tell apart. Though It was too subtle to really grasp, but...

He pressed on, not letting the feeling or how awkward he felt fumbling around distract him. The fact that he did feel something was encouraging, so now he wasn’t going to get sidetracked and lose the possibility of progress.

It was hard to really differentiate his stomach and chest, mostly because keeping a steady tempo of breathing and trying to feel around the muscles in those locations wasn’t the easiest task, and he lost the thread and had to start over a few times as a result.

He persevered despite the setbacks, and realized that he could discern something- something that resembled the flowing of liquid streams which pooled into a single reservoir.

The feeling was especially distinct because he was sure it wasn’t supposed to feel this… disturbed? The steady flow of a stream leading to a serene lake was the image that stood out to him when he pictured how it’s ‘supposed to’ feel.

Now that he was trying to use his body in an unusual way, he realized that the sensation he was describing and the image it conjured was always present as a part of his bodily functions. Just like most people aren’t aware of their breaths, he wasn’t aware of the “streams” and “lakes” either, but now-

Now the streams were spilling water on their banks, and the pool they were destined for raged like the ocean in a storm, threatening to spill its contents as well-

Ayumu stopped trying to analyze these parts of his body as soon as he realized he was beginning to lose the thread again. Not wanting to start over, he hurriedly moved on to his chest, hoping that it wasn’t too late.

To his relief, the goings-on in his chest was the easiest to get a grasp on. Besides the steady heartbeats in his palm, there was another source of subtle pulses from beneath his ribcage. His hands didn’t feel them, nor did his ears hear them, but pulses they were.

And just like with the streams and reservoir, he understood that his Second Heart was not as it should be. The Second Heart had its own beats which did not need to be struck or compelled to reverberate. These beats or pulses or whatever were now the throbbing of an inflamed organ.

The soundless echoes issued were unnatural and clashed with his heartbeats, making him feel vaguely sick the more he concentrated on the dissonance for too long.

...So, Tomos was right. He had injured his Second Heart in some way and now it was in the process of healing itself.

Curiously, maybe because of its injured state, it stood out the clearest out of everything he had felt in his Subtle Body so far.

It was interesting how abstractly he described the feelings associated with the Subtle Body. Streams pooling together, or soundless echoes emanating from something- it wasn’t the way Ayumu usually thought about bodies, but they were the best descriptors he could come up with now that he was trying to put them into words.

Regardless, he carried on, and was rather disappointed to realize that he wasn’t able to feel anything further. He was probably expecting too much of himself, but he didn’t have a frame of reference to judge his performance, which was both frustrating in a strange way but also very reassuring.

It was probably time to talk to Tomos, since he had topics he genuinely felt curious about.

But for the time being, he decided to continue with the exercise to make sure he hadn’t missed anything obvious. Maybe it was an irrational fear, but he didn’t want Tomos to have a lowered opinion of him and his capabilities despite his current apprehension towards these subjects.

Ayumu lost track of the time while he felt around to get a good idea of his Subtle Body, but was starting to make mistakes and fail a lot more after the first success. It was as though his increased confidence was being detrimental to him.

Not to mention, he barely felt anything more than what he had already discerned, which frustrated him and deflated the sense of achievement he had felt.

Ayumu soon realized that he was on the verge of dozing off a number of times, so he stopped and sat up before stretching. Maybe he had already done enough for the day. Trying any more might only discourage him.

“Tomos!” He called, his voice barely louder than his usual conversational volume, which was already very soft. He hoped that the cat’s assurances of being able to feel Ayumu’s summons despite not hearing him were genuine.

He was relieved when a shadow seeped into his room through the windowsill, and the black cat with a white patch on its chest smoothly arose from it, as though rising up from a pool of water.

“I hope you are feeling better.” The cat commented lightly in its distractingly attractive and deep voice. Ayumu nodded in affirmation, conflicted on whether he should tell the cat to return to its previous boyish voice or not.

“Yeah, I am. Thanks.” He said rather lamely, feeling a bit awkward after the previous thought.

“So, um, I tried that exercise you told me about.” Ayumu continued, brushing the feeling off. “And I think I was able to feel parts of my Subtle Body?”

“Ah. Good, good. But- you are working under a misconception.” Tomos said, sounding pleased yet strict, “What you felt was the phenomenon within your Subtle Body, not the Subtle Body itself. It is a liminal existence which toes the lines between physical and metaphysical, so rather than perceive it directly you receive abstract-“

“Alright, alright, geez...” Ayumu cut the cat’s explanation off, frustrated at the cat’s insistence on lecturing him about semantics, “Please let me learn at my own pace- I promise I won’t skip out on learning about everything but for now just... listen to what I have to say.”

“...Alright.” Tomos replied, impassive.

Ayumu sighed and began describing his experience.

The cat listened silently and nodded in satisfaction after he finished, “About what I expected. Though the fact that you identified the pooling of your spiritual energy in your stomach area is interesting...” Tomos fell into a pensive silence for a few moments before speaking again, “Regardless, it is about what I expected someone of your experience level to discern- that exercise aims to let a complete novice detect anomalies within their Subtle Body. It takes some cues from the meditative practices of Zen Buddhist thought, so I expected it to resonate with you more, given your cultural background.”

“I see... Um, my family isn’t really Buddhist but I understand what you’re implying... I think.” Ayumu said slowly, “So does that mean that-“

“A nascent human Subtle Body is identical to the next in every major way...” Tomos said before Ayumu could finish the question, “The specific traditions of a culture, if they stem from very similar beliefs and philosophies, give the Subtle Bodies of said adjacent traditions similar properties and developmental structures and vice-versa. Though, of course, one’s own personal qualities influence the Subtle Body most out of all factors.”

A stretch of silence followed while Ayumu tried to parse the explanation. His effort must have been showing on his face, as Tomos closed his eyes for a second and then spoke again,

“One might liken it to the process of forging a sword- the difference of the techniques common in a culture and the blacksmith’s personal styles as well as the available materials all converge to result in divergent final products.”

“However, one might feel more at home using the styles and techniques common to their surrounding culture simply because they are familiar and easier to comprehend, or those traditions developed to most efficiently utilize the available raw materials- or, perhaps, there are simply more mentors available to receive guidance from. As glorious as forging one’s own road is, a well-trod path is usually the one of least resistance and most efficacy.”

“Outliers, however, do exist, and they need not be discouraged.” Tomos added, and Ayumu wondered if the cat could read minds, or maybe he was just that pathetically predictable, “I believe the saying in your language goes: ‘Ten people, ten colors.’*?”

“Y-yeah, I see. Thanks for explaining.” Ayumu forced himself to smile.

“Now, since I gave the Masaru boy something to protect himself, I should give you something as well.” Tomos said after a curt nod of acknowledgement to his thanks and then summoned one of the caliginous hands from his shadow to hover in front of Ayumu.

Ayumu stared at it blankly, “So you’re giving me the power to make those hands?”

“Not really, no.” Tomos said, “It is not really a feat feasible for normal humans unassisted. Shadows are just a result of a natural phenomenon for humans. For Other, shadows might as well be another limb- an extension of our beings... Though I will admit, I am an exception in my ability to manipulate my shadow to this degree.” The cat’s voice took on a slightly prideful tone as he said the latter part.

“O-okay.” Ayumu said, only vaguely impressed. He didn’t have a point of reference, after all, so it was rather pointless for Tomos to boast, in Ayumu’s humble opinion.

Or maybe Ayumu was being dim.

“Extend the hand you had given me previously.” Tomos instructed, and Ayumu complied wordlessly. The cat used one of its fore-paws to press on the barely visible mark on the back of his hand.

Ayumu didn’t really feel anything, but the shadowy limb which was previously hovering a few inches away from his chest instantly dropped like a rock. It made no sound when it hit his bed but became perfectly flat, looking like an unusually well-defined shadow rather than something solid lying on the bedcovers.

Tomos sighed at the sight, “Please treat it with some respect. It is, after all, a piece of me I have bestowed upon you. You should feel honored.”

“S-sorry.” Ayumu stammered, “I don’t really know how it works yet so-“

“Yes, yes, of course. I was simply informing you about how valuable a gift it is.” Tomos said hurriedly, an uncharacteristic sheepishness creeping into the cat’s voice. “Think of it as a tool- you can practice manipulating it as a way to hone your control over your Subtle Body, and it can be used as an emergency weapon against Others. Though, of course, like all weapons, it is only as effective as the skill it is wielded with.”

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

“Alright, I understand. Thank you, Tomos.” Ayumu said, smiling slightly, “I guess you’ll teach me some other ‘exercises’ to get a better grasp of my Subtle Body?”

“Of course,” Tomos said, beginning to lick the back of his paw casually, “But nothing too strenuous. It is unfortunate, but you still need to recover before we can attempt to test your limits.”

Ayumu didn’t like the sound of that... Well, he would have to push those misgivings to the back of his head for now.

Regardless, he began trying to control the piece of Tomos’ shadow under the cat’s watchful gaze.

It wasn’t hard to get the limb to glide across surfaces, though Ayumu couldn’t control the direction it went in very well. Not to mention how slowly and clumsily it crawled across the surface- quite unlike the fine and smooth movements which Tomos exhibited.

Frustrated, he looked at the silent cat, who had been completely silent until that point.

“Could you give me some tips...?” He asked softly after a few more moments of trying, keeping all traces of frustration out of his voice.

Wasn’t Tomos supposed to be his teacher?

“You are not yet fully aware of your Subtle Body, so it will be hard for you to grasp my instructions. I myself was observing the flow of your spiritual energy to find a way to give you advice you will be able to actually comprehend.” Tomos replied.

“O-okay. So I guess I should keep doing what I was doing?” Ayumu asked him.

“I do have one suggestion- remember that what you’re controlling is supposed to be a shadow. It is not a limb, only assuming the shape of one for the sake of convenience. It is not even a ‘whole’, so to speak. Rather, it can be considered an aggregate entity- a pool of water on a surface, for example.” Tomos explained, “Expanding and changing its shape is too advanced for you, but feel free to attempt anything you can think of.”

Ayumu nodded and really concentrated on the shadow. It still had the shape of a limb, but he now stopped trying to move it as if it were his own hand.

Ayumu considered his new ‘tool’ for a few moments. A shadow moves when the source of light moves- or the object casting the shadow moves. But in the shadow-limb’s case, what was the light source? What was casting it? Where were they?

Well, the answers he assumed were Spiritual Energy and his Spiritual Body, respectively, for the former two questions. If that was the case, then...

Ayumu opened his eyes and concentrated on his breathing, making sure to keep his spine straight. He didn’t flex his muscles, but he could vaguely feel his Second Heart and the pooling of energy without it, now that he had a rough idea what he was looking for.

Both of them were still disturbed, but he could feel...Threads? Veins? Channels? Smaller streams?- which branched out from the base of both quasi-metaphysical organs.

Ayumu screwed up his face, both in concentration and contemplation. It was remarkably difficult to get a grasp on the sensations, but after a few silent minutes of contemplation which felt like cupping water in his hands, he could say for sure that those things were similar to all of those things in some fashion.

A medium- be they for vibrations, lifeblood or life-giving water. The inchoate constructs carrying spiritual energy ran inside the general space where his physical body existed. Neither quite within, nor without, these were definitely a part of his Spiritual Body, he was sure of it.

Wait, “Neither Within, nor Without”? Why did he think of this phrase? He had never encountered it, but it just feels the most accurate descriptor- despite him not knowing what this “Without” and “Within” referred to...

“Neither Without, Nor Within.” Ayumu whispered to himself, and he barely registered Tomos’ ears twitching at the words.

“Excellent,” Tomos said with a nod of approval, “Though your efforts to control your Subtle Body have yet to bear fruit- which is quite expected, I might add- your effort to grasp its nature certainly has. What you put into words is known as the First Aphorism, a fundamental truth of the Subtle Body.”

“I’m not really sure where that came from, to be honest. It was just...” Ayumu trailed off, not quite sure whether to be pleased or not but also very uncomfortable with the seeming praise.

“Understandable. Always remember what I told you- Subtle Bodies are liminal existences, so the ways in which humans interact with them are reflective of that nature. An understanding which employs only Intellect or Intuition inevitably falls to illusions, falling prey to their respective shortcomings.” Tomos said.

“Those who crave absolute surety inevitably fall into zealotry, while those who reject even the possibility of surety fall to either insanity or chaos.” He continued solemnly, sounding very weary and old for the first time since Ayumu had met him. Ayumu wasn’t quite sure whether he understood all of that or not- but he kept a mental note of what he had been told all the same.

Ayumu nodded curtly and continued to practice, keeping the First Aphorism in the back of his mind all the while.

He made an amount of progress after that, partially thanks to Tomos’ instructions and the newfound awareness of those channels within his Spiritual Body, but ultimately it was limited to him being able to steer the shadow in the cardinal directions accurately. Unfortunately, when he tried to have it crawl up a wall, his control of its orientation and direction of movement diminished drastically, but it was progress nonetheless.

At least Tomos seemed satisfied with him, so Ayumu considered the day’s practice fruitful enough.

*****

The next three days went by unnaturally fast, despite how sometimes the time seemed to drag on in Ayumu’s perspective. He had woken up the day after he was given the shadow in a disoriented state, with a strange numbness in his scalp which tingled unpleasantly coupled with an inability to move his limbs.

The state went away after a while, but the sluggishness in his movements remained for a few hours, and he had to keep himself from lying down, otherwise it would have taken a lot of his willpower to actually get up again.

His mother also had taken the following one or two days off, which Ayumu insisted to her was unnecessary, but he secretly appreciated the gesture.

At least she didn’t pester him to go outside as much because of his ‘sickness’, so there were virtually no downsides.

He also practiced with the shadow a few more times since then, though he hadn’t made much progress. Tomos didn’t seem that disappointed, so Ayumu assumed he wasn’t getting stuck on something trivial, which was good for his motivation.

His friends, on the other hand, checked up on him over the phone, and Ayumu was thankful that they had decided against visiting him. As much as he appreciated his friends, he didn’t feel ready to see any of them- even Masaru. And especially Yuki.

On the fourth day he opened the front door in response to the doorbell ringing and found Haruna standing with a slight smile, wearing the usual airy top and skirt- her preferred summer clothes.

“Oh, hi. Come in.” Ayumu said dully, sounding a lot less enthusiastic than he actually was.

“I see you’re very happy to see me visiting.” Haru said drily as she strode past him into the house, and Ayumu noticed she had a plastic bag with her.

“A melon. Grandma sent some for us and I thought you'd like one.” Haru said matter-of-factly before Ayumu could ask, as though reading his mind.

“O-oh, thanks. That wasn’t necessary.” Ayumu said, closing the door and following his friend.

“It wasn’t, but that doesn’t mean I should have come empty-handed.” Haru said, glancing back at Ayumu.

“Gee, I thought you didn’t like formalities.” Ayumu said lightly, a slight smile on his face.

“This isn’t a formality. I thought you’d like to eat something that’s easy on your stomach. You know, having been sick recently and all.” Haru replied simply, acting as though she missed the joke.

“Fine, fine. Not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth.” Ayumu said, and Haru nodded curtly and left the bag inside the fridge before following him to the living room.

“So,” Haru began as she plopped herself down in the middle of the long sofa once they had reached the living room, “are you positive that you’re feeling well?”

“I am.” Ayumu answered promptly, having taken a seat in the nearby single sofa himself, “I only had a fever for a few hours, why is everyone acting like I’m dying—”

“Ayumu,” Haru said seriously, cutting him off, “You know perfectly well what I’m talking about.”

“I-Well,” Ayumu averted his eyes, feeling like a child caught in wrongdoing.

A few moments of silence followed, and Ayumu knew Haru was waiting for him to come clean on his own. Usually he would do just that, but part of him- the less rational part which had been feeling like a cornered animal since the incident with the Kuchisake Onna- possessed him for a moment.

He sucked in air through his nostrils and blurted out, “And you know perfectly well that I don’t feel ready to talk about that stuff.”

Haru hummed in response, looking rather pensive. The silence simply deepened and became more uncomfortably awkward for Ayumu. Seconds ticked by and it became harder and harder to meet his friend’s pensive gaze.

Ayumu averted his eyes and unconsciously started chewing on the inner part of his lower lip when it became unbearable for him to keep staring back, and as though on cue, Haru began to speak with a sigh.

“Look, I’m sorry. I told Yuki and Masaru to give you some space. I came by myself because I wanted to talk to you, but I guess I was a bit too early.” She said, looking apologetic. “I’m especially sorry if you feel like I’m using you as a chance to play Sherlock Holmes.”

“I didn’t-“ Ayumu started, turning towards his friend in an instant, “I didn’t even say anything like that.”

“You didn’t, yeah.” Haru said simply, “But I still wanted to make sure. I’ve made that mistake a few times already and don’t want to repeat it. Well, not intentionally, at least.”

“I- thanks.” Ayumu said softly.

Ayumu looked at his lap and closed his eyes for a few seconds. “Sorry about snapping at you.” He said glumly after a few moments, genuinely remorseful.

Haru gave a long-suffering sigh- and if Ayumu didn’t know any better he’d be infuriated by how condescending it looked on surface level, “Ayumu, I sometimes worry that your mind lives in a parallel dimension.”

“I have heard, yes.” Ayumu shot back dryly, “I’ve already told you, my mind can’t travel between dimensions. I swear, I wish I could send my mind to a different world where I was taller and looked like a supermodel without trying.” He said, half-joking and half-serious.

Haru gave Ayumu a look. Ayumu recognized the look and was glad she had the tact to not state what she was thinking. Instead she joked, “I know you’re not cruel enough to stay in a hypothetical world where Yuki is definitely dead. There’s no way any Yuki could survive such a dashing Ayumu.”

Ayumu opened his mouth and snapped it shut instantly. He had heard nothing- the last few seconds did not exist in his mind.

Ayumu was glad she didn’t press the point and changed subjects on her own accord.

“You know- it feels like fate has thrown some kind of crap at most of my friends this summer.” Haru started matter-of-factly, “Makes me feel a bit left out.”

Ayumu looked at her incredulously, “…So you want to have some issue randomly fall into your lap during summer vacation?” He exclaimed.

“No, not really.” Haru said, pulling up her legs up onto the sofa to sit in a more comfortable position. Ayumu made sure to keep his gaze focused somewhere else while she straightened up her skirt, “I’m perfectly happy with my mundane life. Researching cold cases and other weird stuff with Chio-chan is enough spice to keep me satisfied.”

Ayumu shifted in his seat uncomfortably. If her amateur sleuthing with Shimoyama really was enough ‘spice in her life’ then maybe…

“But I guess... It feels like I just watch from the sidelines most of the time?” She continued, exhaling the words in an almost-sigh, and Ayumu pushed the thought to the back of his mind, “You know what, never mind. Sounds like I’m just pitying myself for having it easy. It’s kinda gross—”

“It’s fine.” Ayumu said hurriedly, understanding what she’s trying to say, “It’s hard to relate to every problem, after all. I’m an only child too so most of the sibling stuff goes over my head as well.”

“Not really what I was talking about.” Haru said thoughtfully and then hummed lightly, “Anyway, I hope you’ll talk to Masaru about what he’s hiding. I know you noticed back then, but I wanted to remind you anyway. Never know what a tired brain might lose track of, after all”

Ayumu was taken aback with the sudden change in topic, but took it in stride, “Yeah, I know.”

“I’ll ask him the next time I get the chance.” Ayumu said, nodding to himself. “I’m sure he’ll try to change subjects if I don’t ask him in person…” He trailed off thoughtfully.

Haru hummed and said, “I’m not sure that’s the whole picture. Part of the reason might be that Yuki and I were there, so he didn’t want to spill parts of your secret with his explanation… Or something like that.”

“Oh- I… didn’t consider that.” Ayumu mentally berated himself for not considering something so obvious, “There really is no hiding from you, is there?” Ayumu said, genuinely admiring and envious of his friend.

“Considering I haven’t figured out the issue you’re hesitating to tell us… You and Masaru dropped a lot of hints without meaning to, you know.” Haru said, and then added in a more serious tone, “And as much as I like your faith in my abilities, I’m not some genius detective.”

Ayumu opened his mouth and closed it again. After a few moments he said slowly, “Well, it’s not really something you would be able to guess. I think you understand the general idea, but it’s not, umm…” Ayumu trailed off.

“Alright, it’s fine.” Haru said, “As I said, I don’t want to play Sherlock Holmes… Or Freud, for that matter. Tell us everything at your own pace and I’ll keep my speculation to myself.”

“Thanks…” Ayumu said, vaguely guilty. He shook his head, as if trying to physically shake off the guilt which had suddenly surfaced in him and glanced at Haru with a vaguely accusatory look, “Also, don’t you think using the fact that someone changed topics to hide something as a way to change topics yourself is a bit hypocritical?”

“No, it’s not. It’s a perfectly valid tactic.” Haru said unashamedly looking back at him with an amused smile, “Not to mention, I’m pretty sure he’s hiding something more serious than just irrational angst. It’s also obviously about you, so you have a right to ask him.”

Ayumu narrowed his eyes, “Fine, fine, I’ll drop it just this once. But, like… just talk to us about stuff.”

“That’s rich, coming from you.” Haru said dryly, making Ayumu look away uncomfortably, “But alright, I am the reasonable one, after all. I will heed Mother’s words.” She said the last part teasingly.

“Alas, I have to mother our uber-rational Father Dearest too.” Ayumu huffed dramatically, but he had an amused smile on his face the whole time, “Papa is getting old and sentimental.”

Haru snickered alongside Ayumu. The rest of their conversation was more the usual topics, and Ayumu was very glad for it. He didn’t want to obsessively think about this drama so being able to just act like nothing had changed really helped his mood. Haru told him about a few shows she thought he’d like, and he was glad that one of them was a comedy game show mainly built around slapstick humor. He did need some laughs at the moment…

“By the way,” Haru said, looking like she had remembered something, “I never told you which convenience store Yuki and I are working at, right? Do you remember that…”

Ayumu nodded and took a mental note of the location. He was being serious about getting the homework out of the way, since that would be one thing less to worry about during the vacation. He was embarrassed to admit that part of him had really gotten into trying to master the fragment of Tomos’ shadow, so he’d spent the time he’d usually use to finish up his homework to practice instead.

…Now that he thought about it, maybe that wouldn’t be the best habit to fall into. He needed to allocate a separate time for practicing using his Subtle Body. Bad grades would just make his life more of a living hell whenever his father would come to visit them and that’s the last thing he wanted to deal with.

It wasn’t long before he was waving Haru goodbye. As awkward as it felt at first, he was very glad that she had decided to visit. He was feeling a lot more cheerful, despite the bubbling dread in the back of his mind.

“Do you still feel hesitant?” Tomos’ voice spoke from behind him as soon as the door had clicked close and Ayumu jumped slightly in response,

“Please, a bit of warning before randomly popping up?” Ayumu sighed at the cat.

“…My apologies.” Tomos replied, shaking his head in a slightly condescending fashion. Ayumu resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

“You are healing well. I suspect at best two more days before you would be able to confer your Senses to the other two of your friends... Yet, you do not seem enthusiastic about the prospect of finally being honest with them.” Tomos said matter-of-factly, not waiting for a reply from Ayumu.

Ayumu sighed, “I don’t think I’ll ever be “ready” the way you’re expecting me to be, Tomos.”

“…I see.” Tomos said, his tone perfectly neutral.

“I just—” Ayumu started tiredly but stopped when he noticed Tomos’ eyes twitch to the door behind him.

“It seems like you have another guest.” The cat said matter-of-factly, but despite his even tone, Ayumu felt ice run down his spine at how ominous the words sounded. He turned around and put his hand on the doorknob to open it.

With a clenched jaw he swung it open, and he felt his eyes go wide. The Other with unnervingly spindly, black limbs and a bulbous head with tar-like flesh was standing right outside the perimeter wall, looking unblinkingly in his direction with its blank, milky-white orbs.

The Terrorborn.

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