Quaraun stopped and stared at the Pixie. Pixies were stupid and trying to explain anything to them was pointless. "Close enough. I suppose a more appropriate question would be, how do you think someone would go about paying a Necromancer?"

"Uhm. . .kind of like, I don't know, you keep mentioning souls, so I suppose a selling your soul type of deal, maybe."

"Ah! So you do know something! Not totally and completely stupid. Marvellous!"

Quaraun suddenly sounded quite pleased. He leapt up from the throne and swooped back over to the shelves of odds and ends and once again began taking things down.

"You want something from me, I need something of value from you. Your soul will do nicely. But you must remember you are losing a piece of yourself. Forever. Sell your soul to the great beyond. Never to have it back. Are you willing to do that?"

Kelim backed towards to door, this suddenly felt wrong.

"Can I think about it?" Kelim asked.

Quaraun turned to look at the Pixie. "Second thoughts?"

"Well, uhm, maybe. . . maybe you were right, the whole, you know, maybe I just want to. . . and but my soul, kind of. . . uhm.. I can't get that back once I lose it, can I?"

Quaraun shook his head, and silently mouthed the word: "No."

"Never?"

"Never?"

The Elf shook his head again.

"Are you sure?"

"Quite sure."

"Can you sell half a soul?"

"Yes. You can. But I don't recommend it."

"Why not?"

"You need both halves of your soul."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I know."

"How would you know something like that?"

"I'm missing half of mine. I was in love once. I sold my soul for love. But I was young and foolish and didn't know what I was really doing."

"You sold your soul?"

"Yes. I wanted to love him forever. I wanted him to love me forever. And the spell worked. It did exactly what it was told to do. I love him forever."

"And so how is that bad?"

"I'll never stop loving him. And I'll never know peace. Or joy. Or happiness."

"Why?"

"Because he's dead."

"Oh yeah. You said that already. I forgot."

"We still love each other. We always will. But his soul wanders the Valley of Death and mine the world of the living and I long for death, that we may again be together, but he was evil, so evil. I didn't know. I didn't want to know. I didn't want to believe. His soul burns for eternity of torment. And I am not yet evil enough for my soul to go to the same place his did. I long for death to be with him again, but if I die now we'll be separated forever. I must become as evil as he was, in order to go to the same place he is, when I die."

"Was he evil?"

"He was very evil. So evil, not even Hell will let him in."

"Than why do you love him?"

"He wasn't evil for the sake of being evil. He had a hard life. Abused. Abandoned as a child. His own mother left him to die. He got bullied and abused, most of his life. It made him mean. He started retaliating. He did a lot of things, he should not have done."

"So, why do love him?"

"He was kind to me. When I had no one else. I was wounded. Dying. Abandoned by my own family. I think he saw himself in me and didn't want me to become what he had become, so he took care of me. Nursed me back to help. He was there for me when no else was."

"It sounds more like you pity him, than love him."

"Perhaps I did."

"So, why aren't you two together? Wasn't that what you wished for?"

"No. Being together, that wording was not in the wish. I wished for us to love each other forever."

"How is that different?"

"I wasn't careful with what I wished for, Boy. I wanted us to love each other forever. And we do. Oh we do. But now he's a Lich. He has no physical body. We can not consummate our love. I lust for his physical touch. The warmth of the flesh that he no longer has. I must correct this. I misworded my wish. I got exactly what I wished for and wishes once granted can't be undone. I became a Necromancer, just for that reason. To resurrect my BoomFuzzy. Bring him back, that we may share our beds again."

"Wait. You bed with other men?"

"Yes."

"But aren't you. . ."

"Also male? Yes."

"Why would you do that?"

"I don't like women, Boy. That's just the way I am."

"But how. . . how. . ." The thought of two men having sex, confused and baffled Kelim who had never considered such a possibility before. "How can you. . . with.. I don't understand. . . how?"

"You've already determined I look and dress like a woman. I liked being fucked like one too."

"You. . . like. . . you. . . you. . . you really are insane aren't you?"

"That seems to be the going opinion."

"Do you. . . uhm. . ." Kelim stammered for several moments. "Uhm.. uhm. . ."

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

"I'm not a mind reader, Boy, spit it out."

"You're the one that poster is about, aren't you?"

Quaraun pulled out the wanted poster.

"You mean this one? Yes. That would be me."

"You're a sodomite."

"Yes. I am."

"And a rapist."

"No. That part is wrong. I'm a virgin. I've never fucked any one. I can't. I'm a eunuch. You don't have be scared of me, Boy. I wouldn't do that you even if I could. I never had an interest in fucking anything or anyone, even back when I could."

"Are you castrated?"

"Not entirely, but that's what they were trying to do. I'm damaged. Badly scarred and can't get erect. I get pleasure from being being fucked by other men, not by fucking them."

"Why would you do that?"

"Let other men fuck me?"

"Yeah."

"I'm a wizard of the Di'Jinn order. I took a vow of celibacy. I fuck nothing, but my vows said nothing about letting other men fuck me."

"I don't think I wanted to know that."

"You asked. I answered. Don't ask questions you don't want answers too."

"So the whole love thing people say about you. . ."

"Is about King Gwallmaiic. The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley. Not my wife."

"Oh."

"I'm a Wizard of the Di'Jinn Order, you might do well to learn what that means. You want a Di'Jinn Wizard casting a love spell on you? Ha! I don't think you even know what a Di'Jinn is. What we do. Our spells aren't cheap."

"I said I'd pay. . ."

"I said I'm not talking about money, Boy. Every action has a reaction. Every spell has consequences. Magic's not a game. Not a toy. And neither is love. The price is very high, and you'll get EXACTLY what you wished for, whether what you wished for is what you wanted or not."

"I want her to need me."

"Need you? Not love you? Heh. Yeah. I can make her need you. Just make sure that's how you word it when you drink the potion. One word out of place. . .. I won't be responsible for what happens. And you'll sign a contract to make sure of that. A Cupid Spell is what you are asking for. I'm not sure it's what you actually want, but I'll make it. It'll take time. You come back to me, next week. I'll have your spell. And the contract for your soul. She'll love you forever, whether you love her back or not, and I know love, Boy, and I know, you don't love her, but you're just like the rest. You won't listen to reason. You'll have to learn the hard way, the nature of love. And how long forever really is. But it's your life and you can do what you want with it. Who am I to stop you? You go home. And if next week, you still want the spell, I'll be here with it."

"Are you gonna take my soul?"

"Only if you are willing to give it to me."

"What if I change my mind?"

"You are uncertain what you want. You should not sell your soul if you have any hesitation."

"Are you telling me not to sell my soul?"

"I'm telling you the choice is yours. I'll not make up your mind for you. But once you've done it, it's done. There's no going back. You must be absolutely 100% sure this is what you want."

"How do I know you won't trick me."

"I'll not take advantage of you, Boy. You are even younger then I was when I sold my soul. I'll give you the chance to back out, the chance I wasn't given, the warning no one gave me. If you really want this spell, I will do it, but think about it first, Boy. Don't make a rash decision that'll you'll regret later. I don't regret selling my soul. I regret that I didn't write the wording of the spell more carefully. More specifically. In more detail. With more specifics as to what exactly I wanted to happen."

"But if I want it bad enough, you'll grant my wish, right?"

"If you want it bad enough that you are willing to give me your soul, yes. I'll grant your wish. Just remember: I am a wizard of the DiJinn Order, I'll grant your wish exactly as you word it, so make sure the words you use, mean exactly what you think they mean and can't be used to mean anything else. Think about what are you are asking for. What it'll do to you. No matter why you do it, selling your soul, is something you'll live to regret. Even if you sell your soul for love. I know."

"You sold your soul?"

"Yes, I did."

"When you were a boy like me?"

"Yes."

"How old are you now?"

"I don't know. I've lost count. Three hundred. Or was it four hundred? How do you count age, when every time you die, you are reborn back at the beginning and forced to live it again? Am I ten thousand years old? I wasn't yet an adult when I sold my soul. I was only 75 years old."

"Only?"

"I'm an Elf. As long as nothing kills me, I'll live nearly forever. It's why Humans think of us as deity and call us Angels. At 75 I was just an adolescent youth, like you, not yet old enough to marry or raise a family, but old enough to hit puberty and be horny. Except I was horny for girls. I wasn't horny for anything until the night I was raped by the Elf Eater."

"The Elf Eater? You mean the Lich Lord?"

"Yes, but he wasn't a Lich Lord back than. One shouldn't fall in love with a rapist, but I was already attracted to him before that. King Gwallmaiic, Elf Eater of Pepper Valley. BoomFuzzy. I loved him so much. I still do. He was everything to me. I couldn't get enough of him."

"Do you regret selling your soul?"

"I regret a lot of things."

"Can I ask what you sold your soul for?"

"I sold my soul for love."

"Do you ever wish you hadn't?"

"No. I don't regret that. For the short while we were together and we lived in glorious happiness. But it ended so soon."

"Did the spell break?"

"No. He died."

"Oh."

"And his death was my fault."

"Really?"

"Yes. I wished for something. Hastily. Without thinking the implications. I wasn't careful in how I worded my wish. That is my regret."

"I you could make your wish over again. Would you change it?"

"If I had it to do again, I would still sell my soul for his love, but I would be more careful in the wording of the wish, because I got exactly what I wished for. I wished for our love to last forever. And it will. Because now I am immortal, and he is a Lich. He's immortal, but undead and with no corporeal body, but he still loves me. I feel it. I feel his love. But I also feel his pain. His suffering. His torment as he walks through the Valley of Death. Trapped. He's a Lich. I'm an Elf. Our love will last forever, but we'll never get to share it physically with each other."

"I'm sorry."

"You should be."

"Why?"

"If you go forward with this spell, be careful with the wording. You'll get exactly what you wish for and that may not be exactly what you really wanted. Do you really, truly want to sell your soul, for the love of this girl?"

"I. . . I'm not sure. . . I. . ."

With a large open sweep of his arm, Quaraun waved his hand magnanimously towards the front door.

"Than, go."

"Go?"

"Leave. Forget you ever came here. You own me nothing but the time you've wasted, and I shall get that back from you eventually. I always do. Nothing comes for free Kelim, some day you'll learn that. Everything has a price. Better you learn it sooner then later. Be careful in your youth. I wasn't careful in mine. Don't make the same mistakes I did. Life is too precious to waste it."

Kelim turned and ran from the Swamp Hag's hovel, running as fast as he could through the swamp, back out of the forest, and all the way to his house, where he jumped into bed and hid under the covers, terrified that the Necromancer had followed him and would pelt him with sea slugs in his sleep.

"Three months ago, in the dead of winter. . ." Quaraun muttered to himself as he pulled his pink velvet tufted throne out of the tiny beaded pink heart bag that hung from his belt. He sat down on the throne and stared aimlessly at the door through which Kelim had just exited.

Quaraun remembered the night Kelim had mentioned. It was the night Quaraun had first arrived in Kelim's village, and the events he remembered were quite different than Kelim had described them.

"Ha ha! His natural instinct as a man kicked in, and Kelim ran bravely in the direction of the women's frantic voice, his fear completely forgotten. Oh dear. More like his natural instinct as a liar. Ah, but that means there was another witness. He was too far away to see everything, close enough to let his male ego imagination run away with him. I wonder if he really believes he rescued her? Or did he show up after. Hmmmm. Possible. Entirely possible. I did leave. She could have been attacked again. Hum. Maybe he's telling the truth. . . still. . . three months ago, I saw that man, attacking that girl, and it wasn't Kelim who rescued her. It was me. Kelim is lying. Why?"