“Just, what are you trying to do, Zeng Zhiqiang?” said Fang Wei. Barking like a dog whose yard had been trespassed on.

“Eh?... Weren’t you paying attention to that lovely speech, that I and my cohorts gave?... We aim to become the new gods of this world…” laughed Zeng Zhiqiang. The deeply-lined golden-brown skin of his face stretched taut as he cackled madly.

Fang Wei, former High-Elder of the Forest of Life and Death, and current Ancestor of the Tree of Passionate Verdance, glared at the tall and stocky figure of the cat-eared mad man before him. Fang Wei could still remember multiple instances where a younger version of himself had been sent out in disciplinary squads and execution squads, just for the sake of capturing the individual in front of him.

Before now, if asked for his personal opinion on the man named Zeng Zhiqiang, Fang Wei would simply term him a rascal. Zeng Zhiqiang had never been as vile, or wicked-hearted, as some of the other characters that Fang Wei had been ordered to apprehend or slay. Yet, the cat-eared was almost certainly the kind of troublesome person, who couldn’t still while the world knew peace.

Sometimes he’d take something that he shouldn’t take. Sometimes he’d sneak into a space he had no right to enter. Sometimes he’d touch something he shouldn’t touch. Sometimes he’d make advances on someone who was already “taken” so to speak. One-part scammer, one-part schemer, one-part scoundrel, and one-part brute. Zeng Zhiqiang was “that” kind of person.

Zeng Zhiqiang had been the kind of trickster that the common folk might turn into a folk hero and wise man, in one moment, and then turn around and characterize them as a diabolical fiend the next. The kind of figure that would either draw the admiration, or ire, of the various lofty personages of their shattered world. Even, staunch and stodgy, old Fang Wei found himself with mixed feelings about the man, and he couldn’t tell if today’s circumstances were a disappointment, or just Zeng Zhiqiang acting in line with all his other deeds and misdeeds.

“Heh, what is it, old prune? Is my face so handsome that you have to stare like that?” chuckled the cat-eared man.

“Tch…” Fang Wei just clucked his tongue. Then he surged forwards. Trailed by other seniors who had agreed to fight alongside him as part of the vanguard to take Zeng Zhiqiang and his co-conspirators down.

As Fang Wei rushed forwards, Zeng Zhiqiang and his crew of old monsters charged as well. The other elders and ancestors that accompanied Fang Wei in his charge, quickly broke away to engage with Zeng Zhiqiang’s people. Thus Fang Wei and Zeng Zhiqiang became a 1 vs 1 affair.

Fang Wei brought out his core-treasure the “Summer’s Steel Fan”. A massive metal fan colored various shades of orange, red, yellow, green, and blue. All the colors of a summer’s day. A core-treasure with immense magical potential, as well as strong utility as a melee weapon. While in its folded state the Summer’s Steel fan could be used as a sword, or sharpened club because the tough, rectangular, main-body of the fan bore a razor-sharp edge.

In response to Fang Wei bringing out his core-treasure Zeng Zhiqiang laughed and drew on the strength of his core-treasure the Hurricane-Sepulcher Tiger that he’d fused with his body as part of an integration technique. The air around Zeng Zhiqiang grew gloomier as his claws grew more prominent and thick, making his hands look like he was wearing a thick pair of furry gauntlets. Zeng Zhiqiang’s golden-brown physique grew even more robust and muscular. A roar emerged from deep within Zeng Zhiqiang as fur sprouted all over his body, his cat-like ears grew more noticeable, and two long, striped, tails appeared at his back.

“Oh yeah...I haven’t gone all out in quite a while. Let’s get a little crazy now, shall we?!” laughed the old cat-eared man.

“Hmph, you were already not-right in the head, to begin with, no?” snorted Fang Wei. Swinging his fan at Zeng Zhiqiang’s head.

Zeng Zhiqiang just smirked as he leaned out of the way of the oncoming fan and then struck back with his claws. Furiously swiping at Fang Wei’s face, chest, and arms, in an effort to score a crippling blow before his cohorts were overwhelmed, or his own strength began to run out.

Sparks flew as Fang Wei’s fan danced in front of him, the stiff metal fan looked almost noodle-like in its apparent undulation. Zeng Zhiqiang didn't pull back or give up. He just continued attacking harder, and striking faster. Throwing blow, after blow, in an attempt to end the battle more quickly.

Fang Wei broke the dead-lock by opening the fan, revealing a gorgeous half-circle of metal, painted with countless shifting scenes of the rising and setting sun hanging above a verdant landscape and blue sea. The image in Fang Wei’s fan became a pristine blue-green ocean with the light of the sun reflecting on its surface.

Sensing something, Fang Wei decided to do something on a slightly larger scale than he’d have originally dared. With a wave of the Summer’s Steel fan that ocean flowed out as an unending torrent capable of wiping away the entire arena and a solid chunk of the city.

“Hah...Looks I’m not the only one who’s gotten a little batty with age, around here!” laughed Zeng Zhiqiang. Swinging his claws at the sky and calling down a squall of violent wind and deathly energy that combated the waters that came from Fang Wei’s fan.

Fang Wei refused to give ground, gritting his teeth and casting a spirit art that would further the strength of his next attack. Then he swung the fan again, this time using a fluttering pattern to create several explosive gusts of hot wind and light, to combat Zeng Zhiqiang’s squall of deathly air.

“Heh, not bad, not bad…Let’s see how you like this!” said Zeng Zhiqiang, wiping a trickle of blood that poured from the corner of his mouth and then roaring as he leaped forward in a spinning dance of wind, dark energy, and claw.

Fang Wei ground his teeth as he had to float like a leaf in the wind, or a piece of light plastic flotsam drifting towards the ground. Catching and redirecting the force that was sent towards him, to keep from getting torn apart by Zeng Zhiqiang’s fierce assault. The plump, and much less robust, Fang Wei grunted as he pivoted on his toes, choosing to retreat by attacking. He closed his fan and a series of suns lined the sides of the Summer’s Steel fan as Fang Wei fed the core-treasure, his spiritual energy, and blood essence.

Sensing danger, Zeng Zhiqiang pulled back and called up a shield of hardened wind, electricity, and spiritual energy. This proved to be the right call when a beam of blazing hot light burst free from the Summer’s Steel Fan and smashed into Zeng Zhiqiang. Sending him flying out of the arena and two-thirds of the way out of the city.

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I observed all this happening and immediately knew that this was a problem.

“Can you handle the rest?” I said. Turning to High-Elders Trefor and Miya.

“Yes, but I’d rather you stayed just in case something unexpected happens,” said Elder Miya.

“Big Sis, he’s asking because something unexpected already has happened...We’re asking because we suspect we’re going to need to move directly pretty soon,” said Jack. Sounding annoyed.

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

“What’s happening?” said Trefor.

I simply pointed. Jack supplied the words.

“Ancestor Fang and the big boss of the party crashers just got into it...Ancestor Fang knocked the Head Party-Crasher halfway across the city which ‘would’ normally be a good thing, but it doesn’t look like it killed the dude, and unless he’s got rocks for brains he’ll definitely be able to see that there’s something wrong with the rest of the city now,” said Jack.

“Is that really that big a deal?” said Trefor.

Before either Jack or I could answer there was a crash, like a glass window being broken. Countless entities began to pour into the illusory space I’d set up, and I could feel an even bigger, even worse, entity approaching from the distance.

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Zeng Zhiqiang smiled, and even he had no clue whether it was an actual smile or just his way of disguising a grimace. He had no clue if Old Fang Wei remembered him but definitely remembered the grim, not-so-jolly, plump sect enforcer. It seemed that they’d both come a long way since they were young men playing cops and robbers together.

“Tch...And that was my wanking arm too,” said Zeng Zhiqiang. Noting the damage he’d weathered while defending against the disagreeable ancestor’s weaponized sunlight.

Zeng Zhiqiang used his one remaining arm to pick out a pill from the storage ring that was equipped on that hand. Then he ate the pill, and his flesh squirmed and his blood boiled, as the pill helped him regrow the lost tissue. Zeng Zhiqiang sighed as he looked at his new arm and the bare fingers on that new arm.

“Shit...I guess I’m not getting those rings back anytime soon,” muttered Zeng Zhiqiang. Trying not to panic about the fact that a fair number of the attribute boosting rings he’d been carrying had been carried on that particular hand. On the one hand, he wasn’t an idiot. He’d known that something like this could happen, and had taken measures to reduce the effects of such a loss. Including looking into the utility of earrings, general piercings, toe rings, and other rings and jewelry. On the other hand, losing those rings this early into the operation definitely stung.

“Fuck it!... I came all the way out here. I might as well go big because there ain’t gonna be any home for me to go if it's not to my future palace in the heavens!” said Zeng Zhiqiang. Forcing himself to laugh. Slapped himself to pep himself up, and willed his core-treasures feral influence over to his new arm. The new limb became a great deal more bestial, toned, and robust.

Zeng Zhiqiang looked around and took a better look at his surroundings. He observed the empty streets and quiet buildings and immediately sensed that something was amiss. Further investigations showed him what was amiss, but before he could give it further thought, Fang Wei was on him again. Summoning up a golden tornado of burning winds that sent Zeng Zhiqiang flying back.

An incensed Zeng Zhiqiang allowed himself to be tossed out of the city, but he got his revenge in the next instant. Firing a great bolt of gloomy gray-green lightning that struck Fang Wei and had the old man tumbling out of the sky.

“How’d you like those apples? Your name might be Fang but only one of us is a tiger!” gloated Zeng Zhiqiang. Preparing another great bolt of death-lightning to finish off his fallen foe.

Just as the gray-green bolt streaked out and was about to hit its target there was an undulation in space. Zeng Zhiqiang found himself suddenly forced to duck away from his own redirected attack.

Two new figures surrounded Fang Wei. One was a tall young man, with dark hair, dark skin, and darker eyes. The other was a woman, with pale coffee-colored skin, snow-white hair, black rams horns, a set of three black tails that ended in spades, and glowing gray-blue eyes.

“Huh...Going by that spatial-shield I’m guessing one of you is responsible for this illusory world I’ve unexpectedly found myself in,” said Zeng Zhiqiang.

Instead of answering, the young man disappeared. Appearing behind Zeng Zhiqiang with such suddenness. That the old man was unable to react in time. Zeng Zhiqiang growled and gasped as the air was knocked out of him, by a blow that could flatten cities. Just as he prepared to retaliate against the young man, a massive pair of black limbs in the shadowy limbs emerged from the ground, grabbed Zeng Zhiqiang by the head, and slammed him into the ground within enough force that he had to hop out of a small twenty-foot deep pit to get street side again.

“S-, Sonovabitch!…You know what? Stop taking your time and get them!” said Zeng Zhiqiang.

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Jack and I wondered who he was talking to, then we quickly realized he was talking to the army of fur-covered demonic entities that he’d summoned and had his cohorts summon, a while back. Right after he’d realized where he was. The bad news was that suddenly we were all thoroughly outnumbered. The good news was that Jack, and several other elders present at this battle, had a solid countermeasure for being outnumbered like this.

In Jack’s case, all she needed to do was summon as much as she could and gather it in the palm of one hand and the fingers of the other hand. Then she drove her fingers of shadow through the palm of shadow, and a massive black finger emerged from the sky and proceeded to crush the army of bestial demons, and anything else that happened to be in the fingers' way, like a drawing on a chalkboard. Leaving naught but flattened rubble, and compacted earth, in its wake.

“Hehe, the fuck is that? Seriously...Here I was ready to mix it up with the old generation, and the new generation's already brought their own set of new monsters...Fuck, fine! FINE! Have it your way. Ancient of the Lost Jungle and Broken Wood! I call on you!” said Zeng Zhiqiang.

“What?! No, please don’t do this! You’ll kill us all!” I cried. Hoping to appeal to the man’s sense of self-preservation, which maybe wasn’t the best tactic, because he just smiled at me and said,

“Junior...I was already dying...If this doesn’t work, I’ve no reason to give a shit.”

Then...it didn’t work. I wasn’t lying when I said his actions would kill us all. The creature Zeng Zhiqiang and his people were trying to summon was far outside their means to control. Zeng Zhiqiang used his own body as a bridge point to bring the creature from its home in the space between the worlds, into our reality.

He got as far as speaking the creature’s true name, and the first syllables, which I suspect was supposed to be a length control spell, to allow him and his group to actually be able to control the beast that they’d called out. Then Zeng Zhiqiang promptly ceased to exist, his body disappearing into a puff of aerosolized blood, and his soul getting broken and shattered, as he used his tiny body to allow a thing that was technically larger than our universe to enter the shattered world.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit...Okay, okay, this isn’t that bad…We have a plan for this” I said. Doing my best not to panic as I watched a thing that could only be described as what you’d get if all the cats that ever were, and ever could be, be they fictional, or real, spat a near-infinite number of hairballs that fused together, came to life, and then began to feed on countless worlds.

“No...We have a few meh beginnings of a plan because we were too busy trying to keep innocents from being swept up in that colossal cat-ears asshole’s plans...and neither of them was all that good,” said Jack. Sounding upset.

“So, you’re saying we should go with plan B then?” I said. Finding myself feeling calm, my desire to keep Jack from freaking out, helping me stay grounded.

“What?! No...Plan C. Always Plan C. Plan A and B put you at too much risk, and saving the middle-realm frankly isn’t worth losing you for me,” said Jack. Furrowing her brow, crossing her arms, and looking annoyed but much calmer.

I laughed and gave my wife a kiss.

“I love you too...and wherever we end up, I think we’ll be fine,” I said.

Jack snorted and returned my kiss. Resting her head against my chest.

“Tch, of course, we'll be fine we're Jacqueline and Jilbert fucking Calloway... Now just do this thing before that big-ass monster-hairball kills us all,” said Jack.

“Okay,” I said. Pulling on the corners of the illusory world I’d created flinging out everyone inside except Jack, myself, and the monster-hairball. I worked my magic and pulled on the logic that ran the world. Crumpling the entire dimension like a paper ball. Squeezing the ball, tighter, and tighter, and tighter, until it was just small enough for me to figuratively pick up toss into a conveniently placed singularity, that I’d marked for this occasion.

Then Jack and I hid inside our private dimension while the mechanisms of the cosmos chewed and ground the illusory world. My main task was playing a high-stakes rhythm game with the cosmos as my opponent, making countless minute adjustments and alterations to the disintegrating space, to keep Jack and me from getting chewed up as well.