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121: Ugh, Finally

So, I was sitting having a talk with all the lovely women who for whatever reason decided they wanted to be involved with my weird self. Things had started off normally enough but then the conversation took a turn for the strange and bewildering.

“R-, Really?!” I said with a look of extreme disbelief and mild reluctance.

“Yes…” said Hong Mirae.

“Really…Really…Like you guys are sure about this?” I said. Still not believing what I was hearing.

“Yes,” said Yuval.

“Indeed…I don’t know why you sound so upset. One would think you’d be happy…As an angel I shouldn’t be saying this…but considering you were formerly human, I would have expected you to have a bit more greed,” said Ellison.

“I…I guess I am happy. I just…” I stuttered. Not sure what to make of my feelings about the ridiculous proposition that I’d just been given.

“And…Well, it’s not like you didn’t consider the possibility…Right? Or, did you not consider it?… In which case, which of us were you planning on dumping?” said Kian.

“Uh…”

That’s when the universe froze over, and the cosmic blob of living music that we’d been watching for half a millennia finally hatched?/detonated?opened?...what have you. Whatever you want to call it. I’d say that it happened simultaneously with damn good timing, and completely shit timing, considering I’d been waiting for a little over 500 years.

Before I get into that. In case you’re curious, apparently, my terminally awkward ass somehow managed to bumblefuck my way into a harem-ending for this bizarre cosmic galge game I and the ladies had been playing.

I don’t know “how”, and I was about to ask “why” when the Dark Song Orchestra decided that “now” was the point where they’d move forward with their assault on the Empty-Bell Complex and their incursion against the territories held by the House of Antipodes and the Division of Cosmic Artifice.

“Uh…I should probably…” I said. Leaping up to jump into action.

“Already, done. Now back to talking about us,” said Yuval. Staring into empty air in a way that suggested she’d likely just sent our superiors in the Division a message to let them know that the DSO were on the move.

“Oh…Right…” I said. Reluctantly sitting back down again.

I hope I haven’t given you folks the impression that the Empty-Society was personally going to fight against the DSO on our own, because if so, that was definitely the wrong bloody impression. The Dark Song Orchestra was an organization that was on par with the House of Antipodes in terms of legacy and power. I might be able to fight some of their members but definitely not all of them, and definitely not their heavy hitters.

Of course, we weren’t just going to sit this fight out completely. If the DSO brought an army of immortals around our level, or simply just tried to screw up the Empty-Bell Complex regardless of whether they were losing or winning, the Empty-Society and its allies were still plenty strong enough to defend the multiverses under our control against that.

We just needed to leave actually beating these immortal monsters that were strong enough to make our nigh-omnipotent heavy-hitters look like ephemeral ants to people who were a bit “taller”. The older generation would fight amongst themselves, and us juniors would fight in the little leagues. There’d be none of that shonen manga “youth fighting way above their league”- nonsense happening today.

In fact, we’d already done a fair bit of defensive work in the centuries before. Preparing for this day, for the sake of handling the matter with extreme safety and stability. Building up the Empty-Bell Complex’s defenses, and setting up a system that would essentially halt the flow of time through all 122 multiverses.

If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

The biggest part of our plan involved simply pausing the flow of time within all the multiverses under our control, both 122 that belonged to the Empty-Society, and the multiverses that were held by our allies at the same level. We were pausing the time in those multiverse, because resource-wise it was actually easier to repair the space if we froze the flow of fate and time there, rather than having reverse time if anything too dire happened.

There was also a second measure set in place that would allow our Empty-Society to flee with the spaces that we controlled stored away in our not-so-figurative pocket if things got too hot and heavy.

“So, back to what we were talking about,” said Yuval.

“Uh, alright…Shoot,” I said. Nodding while wearing a face that I could only pray hid the fact that I was kind of freaking out here.

“Are you okay, Jill? You’re looking a bit green there?” said Hong Mirae. Her voice tinged with concern.

“Oh, me? Oh, I’m fine…I must have eaten something a bit off,” I said. Lying lamely.

“Really? I thought you were being of pure nothingness? Doesn’t nothingness swallow everything with no problem?” said Ellison. Giving me her usual innocent angel from planet-Z look and adding a hint of guilt to the feelings of discomfort I was already feeling.

“Uh…Sometimes…And sometimes stuff goes down the wrong way…Er, anyway, we were talking about us?” I said. Blushing at being called out on my clumsy lie. Changing the subject, but not in my favor.

“Oh, alright then…Would you like me to heal you?” said Ellison.

“Er, that’ll be okay,” I said. A little cold sweat ran down my back.

“Well, so long as you’re sure…,” said Hong Mirae. Her sudden transformation into a stuffed felt puppet indicated that the “grownups” had started fighting and reality wasn’t liking it too much. Which made me decide to trigger some of those protective measures, that we’d all set on the Empty-Bell Complex, a little early.

“Anyway, why do I get the sense that you’re less than pleased that we all decided to call it a truce and see if we could all marry you?” said Yuval.

The room we were all sitting in shook and trembled. A voice that sounded like a thousand worlds being destroyed cried something blasphemous and cacophonous. Then I heard what unmistakably the voice of my boss Seren say,

“Oh, yeah! Well,

“Uh…I don’t know…” I said. Because I genuinely didn’t know. I mean, it’s not like I came from a monogamous background like many of the folk in the Sigfrid Union.

“I guess…I guess I just felt six was a bit more than I expected,” I said.

“Really? It’s only two more than the four you intended, isn't it?” said Ellison.

“Well, yes…I do have basic math skills, Ellie..But that’s not that point…Even 1 can be a big addition when we’re talking about people,” I said. Stifling an eye roll, because I’d caught on that sometimes Ellison’s Girl-From-Mars schtick was at least semi-purposeful.

“I don’t really see what the problem is here? You love us…We love you…Jack and Kal have been on board with it from the beginning…” said Yuval. Suddenly transformed into a giant tiger in a top hat.

“What?!....Shit…” I said. Quieting down near the end because I knew my wives well enough to believe Yuval’s words.

“...Plus, we’ve been in a four-way deadlock for the last 500 years and by now the four of us like each other too much to decide who’ll be the one to walk away,” said Hong Mirae.

“Really?” I said.

“Yeah…” said Hong Mirae. Suddenly in the form of some kind of humanoid dolphin.

“Shit…”

“It’s not like you’ve been any help…You could’ve dumped one of us,” said Hong Mirae.

“OOF…Fair point…” I said. With a sigh.

“So, what do you say?” said Yuval. Leaning forwards. The demoness showing an uncharacteristic amount of insecurity.

“Mhn…Fine, okay…” I said. Maybe giving the most unenthusiastic response to a four-way wedding proposal that had ever been given.

“Yay!…I mean…No, wait…Yes, yay…I meant what I said. Yes, ” said Kian. Blushing, and smiling, through her steepled fingers.

“Hm, it looks like they're done fighting,” said Hong Mirae. Who was back to looking human, and now gazed through the wall of the room we were all sitting in, to look at the world outside.

I got up and looked out the window and saw countless star-sized corpses floating in the void. Orbiting around several galaxy and universe-sized corpses. It was actually kind of a problem, this much additional mass could cause havoc on a universe, potentially affecting the flow of entropy within the multiverse, or spreading various forms of physical and metaphysical corruption throughout the realms.

“It's probably best if I clean that up…” I muttered.

With a thought, the corpses were cleaned up. The bodies pulled into my body for processing and consumption. Then with another thought, I put Sigfrid’s universe, and the rest of the Empty-Bell Complex back where they belonged.