The increase in problems lately is getting on my nerves. Why the Hell did I go through the trouble of getting help if I'm stuck solving all of the problems myself, still?
“There. That should do it.” I hand the plans back to the hatchling and leave the workshop.
“Ah!”
“What!” I turn around. Something's off. I can't put my finger on it, but... “Why do I get the feeling you're stalling?” The boy shuts his mouth. His eyes widen. Oh Hell.
“Who.”
“Huh?”
“On whose orders are you making an idiot out of me!” I grab his shirt and pull him in.
“The Council! The current...” He shuts his eyes. I drop him and go back to the Palace. I should have known... It's been days now since I've been constantly requested outside of the Palace... Screams echo through the halls. A roar rings next. Oh no. I run in. Emerald roars in the middle of the Throne Hall. She sways to the sides and swipes.
“What is this!” I call out. The Cat sees me and jumps over, roaring right in my face. Her eyes are in pain... Her body writhes again, the fur stands on its ends.
“Where's the Heir! Where is she!”
“The dungeon!” A maiden answers me from behind. She's out of breath. “The Advisors took her there!” She points out. Emerald jumps out first. I run after her.
“Where!” I grab the woman with me and dive under. I emerge by the entrance. Emerald's closing in.
“Last cell, end of corridor...” The maiden collapses. I set her down, gently.
“You heard her! GO!” I point. Emerald runs past me. “SHADOWS!” A pack of men emerge next to me. I get running again too. “Wanna explain it to me how the Heir ended up in the dungeon alone with the Geezers?”
“We were told you approved!” Someone answers.
“We didn't know they took her there!”
“What's the #1 Rule of the Shadows?” I ask.
“Trust nothing...” A feint mumble…
“DAMN IT!” One of the youngsters picks up speed and runs past me. Screams reach us as we make our way through the stone corridor. What’s that buzzing? Another scream. Higher. Lighter... Zarri! Shattering sound follows suit. I jump a shadow and stand in the broken-down doorway of the cell. What in the... Emerald stands guard over a curled-up Zarri in the middle of a pile of scattered glass... Some sort of a device is placed next to Zarri. Four Robes take refuge in a corner each. The Shadows catch up.
“Finally! Get that Beast under control! Do you not realize how difficult it was to get one of these!”
“Not to mention the price!”
“I know this. It's one of Primerian toys.” A Shadows points to the thing.
“What does it do?” I ask the guard.
“Turning the handles here generates power, something happens here;” he points to a part of the contraption; “and my guess - lighting comes out there.” He points to the opening inside the glass dome...
“Say what now?” I walk over to the device. “You better not have been doing here what I think you have...”
“You don't understand!”
“It's for the sake of Noxanda!”
“Just imagine what we can achieve with a Celestian at our disposal!”
“This is merely to help awaken the power!”
“This is nothing compared to the Cosmic Energy!” I punch the lights out for the nearest Robe and walk over to Zarri. Emerald allows me to take her, although I feel the anger aimed at me. I hear ya...
“I..ra?”
“I gotchya.” I whisper.
“What are you doing!”
“Give us the Heir!” A pair of hands come into my line of sigh. I pull my dagger out.
“Make another move.” I hold my hand straight out. “I'll slit you open where you stand.” I tilt the blade a little. The Robe doesn't say anything. Nor anyone else.
“As of this moment. Nobody will touch this child. Ever. She's not a toy or a tool to be used for your wicked delusions. You are here to serve her. Not the other way round.” I sheath my blade.
“Lock 'em up. There are plenty of cells to choose from. Don't worry. I'll make sure the Queen hears of this. You'll be lucky if she orders you to a blade instead of the rope.” I leave the Shadows to deal with the bastards. Emerald and I take Zarri out of the cell.
“Go and wait for us in her room. I wanna talk to her alone.” I tell the Cat over my shoulder. She blinks once at me. I slip through the shadows. I set Zarri down on the roof as we reappear again. She's a bit out of it... I take the opportunity to compose myself...
“What? Where?” She wakes up.
“You're ok now. It's just us.” Zarri sits up and hugs her knees.
“Wanna tell me what happened?” She shakes her head.
“Why did you go with them?” Nothing.
“Why didn't you wait for me?” No answer.
“Why didn't you tell us what's going on?” Silence.
“Zarri, please...”
“They said it would help...”
“Help who?”
“Help with my powers... They said I could help a lot of people if I...” She chokes up a little. I give her time...
“They said people would love me if I... They said Mom would be happy... So I...” Oh Hell... I cover my mouth with my hand.
“I just wanted to be useful!” And she bursts into a cry, falls over to the side and grabs onto the fabric of my pants.
“Nobody ever plays with me! Nobody ever lets me do anything I want! Nobody wants to be my friend!” Zarri bawls her eyes out.
“NOBODY wants me!” She cries out.
“NOBODY loves me!” Another shriek... Oh no... Sweetness, no... I freeze up with my hand over her back... Can I? She's not an infant anymore... Is it allowed?
“Dad's dead! Mom's always sick because of me!” It's starting to hurt...
“Emerald never leaves the Stables! You're never there when I!!” Her cries pick up again... The stupid collective guilt of ours drove her into a corner... She did what she thought would be best... My heart aches just listening to her cries... My spirit breaks. My arms embrace the frightened girl and I hold her to me... Little Zarri burrows into my chest. Her cries muffle themselves into my body. Damn it. I am too weak for this... I look up into the sky... Devona, you bitch. This is supposed to be your job... Wykren too! You, bastard! How dare you do this to this creature! Look at her! Frail, weak, scared, lost and confused... Little Zarri cries herself to sleep. I cradle her a minute longer. Maybe an hour... Who knows... I carefully slip through the shadows and emerge again in the Throne Hall. The evening sun casts assassin perfect shadows here. I carry the little one back to her room. Emerald lays in the middle of it. Good. It's about time she returned to us. I lay Zarri down in the bed and lightly tuck her in. I stand guard over her for a little bit longer and slip through the shadows to see the mother. I find the useless woman in her usual spot.
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“What is it now?”
I throw the covers off her. “Get up. Get up right now. I had enough of you.”
“Who are you tell me what to do.” Devona pulls the other blanket on her. I grab her hand.
“The one who just put your crying and scared child to sleep. Do you even know what the idiots been doing with her? Do you!” I glare and growl at her. “You selfish bitch. All you care about is not hurting yourself! You don't even care for the suffering his daughter goes through by herself!”
“What do you know about me!” She struggles. I tighten my grip. “What do you know about love! What do you know about the pain it leaves behind!” She fights me. I don't let go.
“I tried it your way! I can't do it! I'm too weak!”
“AND I'M NOT! Just because you're weak I'm supposed to be strong enough for the three, no, four of us? You, me, Zarri and Wykren! The hell you take me for, woman! I have my limits too you know!”
“For what! You never cared about anyone in your entire life! The way I see it you have enough space in your empty heart!” Her hand slips and scratches the side of my face. I feel the skin sting a little and a slight warm wets it.
“I have no space there. I have no heart. You stole it from me. All I have left is a soul that hurts watching your daughter shed innocent tears of fear, because she thinks she is all alone and unloved in this world. All I have is an empty shell for a body that can shield her... I love her as my own not with my heart, but with my entire existence. I'll raise Hell for her in a heartbeat and not think twice about it. But you.” I look at Devona.
“You - I loved ever since that brutal winter in the mountains. It was you, who got my heart beating again. But before I realized what happened, Wykren had already...” I lean in closer to her. “I've loved you for a lifetime. Suffering alone in my private and personal Hell because of it. I've lived an eternity fighting myself every. single. day. So don't you dare talk to me about love and pain.” I let her hand go.
“I'm through saving you. You're not worth the effort anymore. If this is the best you can do as a mother, then go ahead and rot here. It was nice knowing you.” I dive under and emerge next to Zarri's bed again. Still asleep. Good. I notice my reflection in the mirror. The red streaks on my face... I borrow a towel and clean myself off. I take a health potion and splash some of it on the towel and press it against the skin. The scratches heal up nice and quick. Normally I wouldn't care, but now... I throw the towel in the trash. Better not scare the little one. I go take one last look at the sleeping Treasure. Tiny pearls shine in the corners of her eyes. I catch one with the back of my index. Something aches inside my chest... How painfully obvious it is... I alone am not enough to ease her soul... She might not know what she is missing, but her being feels the absence of something... That something being a damned idiot... I should have died that day... Not him...
“Watch her. Don't leave her side.” Emerald whips her tail to me.
He loves me? I sit in the bed, dazed. But... He's always so cold and... Why... Wait... Did he leave then because of me? Is that what Wykren was talking about? Owning Ira his freedom? Did Wykren know? If he did why didn't he... Wait... Zarri! Something happened to her! I get out the bed, my foot tangles up in the blanket and I fall to my knees. I struggle for a moment to get out and quickly crawl away. Zarri! It takes me a few tries to get back up right. I limp across the corridor to Zarri's bedroom. I open the doors and Emerald's death stare stops me to a halt.
“May I see her, please?” I whisper. She puts her head back on her crossed paws.
“Thank you.” I carefully approach the bed. My daughter's sound asleep... Gently, slowly, I crawl into bed next to her. Her eyes are puffy, the nose has almost a purple tint to it... She must've cried a lot... What I miss? What happened to you, Treasure? I stay with her through the night... Only early next morning does Zarri wake up. After a few tries, she finally tells me what the fools have been trying to do with her. My blood boils. The nerve! I wait for Zarri to fall back asleep, kiss my girl on the forehead and leave her to snooze some more. I pull myself together. How careless have I been! Idiot! Now I've done it! I got comfortable. As long as she was alright, I told myself she won't need me. Moron! I let this happen! I let those fools take advantage of her! Ira was right... About everything... Why didn't I see it sooner? Why did it take for my daughter to get electrocuted to see it!
No. That's not it. I didn't want to see it. I didn't want to understand it. I didn't even try... Now I remember why. I was never interested in myself. Life was dull and boring. I was dull and boring. Nobody ever cared about me, just my use. I was worth something only if I was of some use to someone else... Then Wykren happened. For the first time, someone was interested in me... I liked that feeling. I didn't want to give it up... That's why... That's why I wanted to fight for him. To fight by him... Until... My reason for my strength and power disappeared... Something beats inside of me. I know this feeling. I'm pissed. Just like that time when I had to go see Carniran. He dared to interrupt my misery and I was pissed at him for it. But now. The feeling is stronger. I feel a surge of rage like never before. This is power. This is it. I feel it. I am pissed off. I want blood. I may not care what happens to me, but nobody will hurt my, no, our child. I take a freezing cold shower. I failed to realize it. This isn't about me... Ira was right... It's about her. I have to be strong for her. Wykren's gone. I can't rely on Ira to carry that burden alone anymore. She is my flesh and blood. What a moron I have been. Hope it's not too late to make it right...
“Wykren, sorry for the wait. I’m going now. There are throats that need tearing.” I fix myself up and gather up the Geezers in the Throne Hall. With the four in chains too. I stand tall in front of our desk.
“Priestess! How wonderful it is to see you up and about again!”
“SAVE IT!” I thunder down. “DO YOU TAKE ME FOR A FOOL! HOW DARE YOU TAKE ADVANTAGE OF MY ABSENCE!! WHO GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO ELECTROCUTE MY DAUGHTER!! Lying to her alone is enough of a reason for your imprisonment, but this!! I SHALL HAVE YOUR HEADS FOR THIS!!”
“Priestess, please!”
“We meant no harm!”
“Simply wanted to help the child awaken her powers!”
“SPARE ME!” I continue to roar. “I shall only ask this once. Who else, besides them was part of this? If nobody confesses then all of you shall face the consequences together.”
“Just them!”
“The Council has strict orders to stay with our posts. These four were the only ones stationed here!”
“We're not even all of us here. The Council is scattered all over Noxanda...” I hold a hand up. The Robes shut up.
“This makes it easier then. You have less than a minute to convince me to let you keep breathing.”
The Robes drop to their knees. “We only had Noxanda's best interest in mind!”
“It won't happen again!”
“Honest!”
“On that - we can agree. Take them away.” Shadows surround the geezer bunch. “Do with them as you see fit. I will not have morons like these under this roof. Let the public know exactly, what they are being punished for. They will decide your faith.” I watch the blood drain from the faces of the four imbeciles as the reality sinks in.
“Dismissed.” The rest of the Council bow to me quickly and disappear too.
“Priestess.” Ira kneels by the last step. “I was the one to select the four fools. Clearly the system I used is flawed beyond my comprehension. I take full responsibility for what happened because of my failed choice. Please. If you would.”
“NO!” Zarri runs out, but a maiden stops her.
“Mistress, please!”
“It's alright, Mistress.” Ira smiles to my girl. “Mistakes happen. We pay for them.” I understand why he's doing this. He got rid of the old Council and he was the one to put the new one in place. Part of the blame does lie with him. However...
“I was the one who got tricked! I fell for the lie! Punish me too!” Zarri slips past the maiden and hurrily climbs a few steps, tumbling and crawling. “I made a mistake too!” Tiny tears wet her eyes. I wanna hold her... Ira stares at me desperate, begging. I sigh.
“In that case, I should be punished alongside you. I failed to protect you as a mother and a queen. If I had been around more, none of this would have happened in the first place. Yes, Gazarria, you fell for a lie. That was your mistake. However. You are a child still. It is my responsibility as your patent to teach you the ways of life. I failed. That is my mistake. So your mistake lies with me. As a child, you cannot be held responsible for your patents' mistakes. So no. You will not be punished. This time. As for you.” I turn back to Ira. He hasn't blinked once yet.
“You are more valuable to this land and our people alive. I shall overlook this incident. But. Be warned. Make sure nothing like this happens ever again. Or it will be your life at the mercy of the public. Is that understood?”
“Yes, Priestess.”
“If you wish for punishment still, feel free to spend five days in the same cell where the incident took place. Reflect well.”
“Yes, Priestess.” Ira dives under. I return behind the desk and sit down in the only chair... I turn to Zarri again.
“Come here.” I hold my hands out. She hesitates, but does as told and climbs into my lap.
“I understand why you went with it. I know you meant well. I know you wanted to help. You are the first-born Heir to Noxanda.” I stroke her head. “Treasure, remember this, please: you are a Child first and the Heir second, ok?”
“Mh.”
“Good girl. Don't worry. Ira will be fine.”
“Mh.” She hides her face into my robes. I notice Emerald stare at me. All three of us messed up miserably this time... I nod to the Saber. She nods back, walks in and lays down in her regular spot - on the last step.
I stand in the middle of the cell where Zarri was being hammered in with lightning. It makes me wanna puke... It'd skin the fools alive an inch at a time. I'd keep them alive just to prolong the pain. No matter how pissed off I am, I feel relieved Wykren isn't here. He would have raised Hell... Devona's a clever one too. The public will go nuts. This whole “Royal Family” thing is fairly new to them, with Zarri growing up it's even exciting for them. They won't let it slide... Zarri. I smile at that scrambling image of her, trying to take the blame on herself... Brave little one, isn't she? She gets that from you, I bet. I walk around the room, circling the glass shards. Five days. So be it.