We regrouped back at the town of Rivershire, where we stood in front of the town hall. The mayor greeted us with a cheerful chuckle, wearing a green velvet coat and an elaborate top hat adorned with an enormous handlebar mustache. His face was round and beaming, and his eyes were closed in a perpetual smile. And by that, I mean his eyes were literally closed the entire time like Brock from the Pokemon animation.

“You made it back safe and sound!” he exclaimed, relief washing away the worry that had been etched on his face. “At least we have one victory to be grateful for today. We sent a platoon of men from the guard after the main bulk before you left on your own search."

"Oh dear. I hope the offensive was successful Mayor Roden," Captain Olimar asked. "Reports have indicated the gang has been actively raiding settlements closer toward the border. Rivershire is close to the capital, but our intelligence is murky with how quickly things have been moving."

Mayor Roden nodded grimly. “It’s true. Thank goodness nobody was seriously hurt last night, thanks to the timely arrival of your men, However, our situation is significantly better than other small settlements just beyond in the Greatforest. I heard that some of them were completely wiped out, with all their women and children taken away."

Wait, were we dealing with human traffickers here on top of thieves?

The mayor then turned back toward town hall and began walking, motioning for Olimar, Lori, and I to follow him along with an impatient wave of his hand. We followed him through the front doors of town hall, across the lobby and upstairs into a conference room with large windows that overlooked the street below. After settling in, we began to debrief.

"I trust we've secured everything to satisfaction? What did your men find in the safehouse raid? Anything significant unaccounted for?" Lori inquired immediately, giving Mayor Roden a serious look.

Mayor Roden gave an emphatic shake of his head.

"Nothing of extreme value, but we did find quite a few knick-knacks when we were searching their bases. This is the largest amount of goods they ever took from our city. Typically they only go for small hauls items, such as weapons, armor, jewelry and trinkets, but sometimes they will steal food or tools. We are just fortunate to have most of it back."

He looked me in the eye and made a friendly motion with his hands.

"And you, young lady, did quite the job last night! If that wasn't the fiercest magical thrashing I have seen in my lifetime, then I don't know what was! You are a veritable living hurricane!"

Living hurricane? I was way too hungover to question it.

Whatever. I was just glad we got the job done without really having to fight.

I just wanted to get things over with, and find a way to secure safety and comfort while I figured things out.

Lori smiled politely. "You're welcome. By the way, did anything unusual happen in the aftermath?"

He shifted his weight and tugged at his collar. "Well, nothing major. Some villagers reported seeing a figure wearing a heart mask and a flowing black robe in the distance as our men returned, but the figure disappeared as soon as it appeared. Two people also reported sightings of peculiar monsters near the riverbanks, but thankfully no one got hurt. It seemed like the monsters wanted to attack from their reports, but then they ran off into the night."

Mask and robes? I thought about the man I thought I'd hallucinated in the forest...

"That's peculiar," Lori said, her brow furrowed. "Are you sure it was a heart mask?"

"Peculiar indeed," Olimar continued, before turning to Lori. "My team encountered something similar before we arrived here. Do you have any idea who it might be?"

"Hmmm..." Lori mused seriously. "I may have to get back to you on that Olimar. It's giving me a foreboding feeling."

Olimar scratched his chin dubiously.

"Hey..." Lori tapped her chin thoughtfully. "So what exactly did happen to the rest of the thieves? Olimar and I went after the thieves who'd taken our own belongings, but I know there were other groups that'd scattered in different directions."

"We found their safehouse and recovered the stolen goods, but," the mayor said, his voice trailing into a sigh. "The thieves refused to come quietly. They resisted arrest, and they were trying to escape further into the mountains."

The old mayor turned to Olimar, and his wrinkled face seemed to sag with weariness and anxiety.

"You understand that they wanted to escape arrest and didn't want their identities to be made public. In order to apprehend them, we had to attack their base of operations. We couldn't risk giving them time to regroup. However, ten of the town guards were injured during the pursuit." He shook his head sadly.

"What? Ten men were hurt?" Olimar exclaimed. "The thieves only had eight men remaining when we routed them!"

"It was a horrendous, violent encounter, and we'd grossly underestimated how many members had taken to the field," the mayor answered, "but one of Fals's lieutenants was taken into custody."

"What became of the officer you captured?" Lori asked.

"He goes by the name of Sartorious Boscelli," the mayor started. "Word has it he originally worked for Lord Bercouli. Betraying his employer and joining up with the Picarosos was his idea of making a quick crown and becoming popular. His list of crimes include larceny, homicide, kidnapping, trafficking, and deception."

"That guy sounds like a winner!" Lori laughed. "Too bad he landed himself in prison instead of becoming famous."

I shot Lori a cold look but kept quiet. She was starting to annoy me.

"At least he won't be able to do those things again," the mayor declared. "I'll make sure he spends the rest of his days behind bars."

"Very sensible," Olimar gave an approving nod.

Mayor Roden stood up in front of us, his face grim with focused determination. "We discovered an abundance of misappropriated goods, narcotics, and alcoholic beverages in the Picaro's hideout. And it would appear that their ringleader, Fals Lapine, has resorted to violence, coercion, and intimidation to recruit some of their victims. Furthermore, they have been illegally manufacturing and marketing weapons and armor. It's likely they have been involved in other illicit activities."

"Criminy.." I muttered tiredly. That sounded serious.

"This is getting worse every day," Olimar lamented. "Alas, I wish His Majesty would take action on them sooner rather than later."

"Well, we can't let these criminals free," Lori firmly insisted. "They're probably planning something big."

She turned towards me, her expression stern before she pointed at me with a happy, go-lucky grin. "I'm counting on you to stop them."

"Me?" I squeaked. "Why me?!"

Lori beamed proudly. "Because you're a great fighter!"

"Great fighters don't embarrass themselves like I do," I grumbled. "Did you see how I just got vertigo and fell right on my face today?

"Of course I did! You were amazing, though! Just look at what you managed to accomplish even then!"

"...yeah...thanks..." I mumbled awkwardly.

"Besides, you've already defeated the Picaroso Gang once, remember?" Olimar added encouragingly. "I can pull strings and get another Rank B job filed right away. We'll get the funds deposited for this job to Lori's account at the Adventurer's Guild the moment we reach the Royal Capital."

God. Fucking. Dammit. I don't even know how I did that! I was blackout drunk!

"Good point," Lori smiled brightly. "Come on, we should go file that paperwork first. Then we can discuss things further."

I groaned loudly and slumped onto the ground.

My hangover was starting to fade, but I was still feeling miserable. Even thinking about doing something made me feel sicker.

"Are you okay?" Lori asked worriedly.

I shook my head, "I...I think I'm going to hurl again.

Please give this job to someone else."

Lori sighed with exasperation. "Fine."

She stood up and walked off.

After she left, Olimar approached me warily. "Alice, are you alright? Are you feeling ill?"

"Nnngh...yes..." I moaned weakly. I put on my best Oscar face, hoping he would buy it. "I'm fine. Really. It's just...a little bit of nausea...and dizziness...nothing to worry about..."

"Okay, good." He patted my shoulder reassuringly. "It will pass, Alice."

I forced myself to smile and nod.

We finished settling our business with the mayor, and then we departed from Rivershire Crossing with Captain Olimar's men in tow. It felt awkward to be surrounded by two dozen soldiers, but apparently Lori and I were part of the nobility, albeit minor, and they saw it as their duty to see us to the capital safely. We traveled on a cart drawn by those struthid birds, and Olimar's men escorted us on a combination of spotted zebra-like horses and struthids of their own.

Although I'd played it up... the hangover was definitely awful, and the carts we were on traveled at breakneck speeds. If I had to approximate the speed, it felt like we were going at around forty miles an hour without windshields. There's no way that should have physically worked - I should've been tossed right off or splattered!

The bumps and jumps on the road were nauseating and annoying, and all I had was a bagful of inscrutable scrolls to keep me company. I dug through my bags again, and stopped for a second when I looked at the bottom of her bag. It seemed like a good number of rings, earrings, and gemstones had gone missing from the bag. Furrowing my brows with annoyance, I searched around the rest of her travel bag's pockets with no success. Those thieves must have made off with a small fortune in Alice's items.

Eventually, I was briefly snapped out of my hangover when I saw a large city off in the distance as pulled over a hill, the kind that you'd display in a history textbook. The sight was a marvelous one to behold, however, if anything screamed 'Royal Fantasy City' it was this. It...was almost indescribable to me, with many tall, round buildings that looked like they came out of Turkey, with winding boulevards and an enormous armada of ships docked in the harbor.

It wasn't terribly close yet, but the light reflecting off the ocean in the afternoon caused my eyes to widen in marvel. The whole city itself felt like it had come straight out of a fairytale. As much as I'd always hated my experience in this world thus far, the moment we spotted that place I fell in love with it. It seemed so full of color and energy. It felt like it had sprung out from my own head with everything it needed to create the most majestic and vibrant scene. For some reason, this feeling of majesty came with a surprising twang of...nostalgia?

I couldn't describe my impression any other way. I'd just been so taken aback by what was in front of me after a full two days of whirling danger, hunger, filth, and monotony.

It was quite a pleasant change, I had to say. I wished we could stop here and simply admire the city from the outside. The city's design was unlike anything else I'd seen in my world, but it was like blending the Japanese ocean view with English and Ottoman architecture. I could make out snaking paths of water in the city proper that looked like Venetian canals. The sun was beginning to set, and as we approached, lights began to spring up around the city. It seemed like this world had street lighting or something, which caused me to breathe a sigh of relief.

"This is it!" Lori perked up as we pulled closer to the city. "You just can't get away from here, huh little sis?"

I squinted my eyes at her suspiciously, but I couldn't blame her for her excitement. I just wanted to get off the road at this point and off to somewhere warm.

They immediately led us off the main city streets to inquire our purpose. After finding out we had clear business within the gates, no further questions were asked. Once satisfied, the soldiers simply returned to what they were doing before. It wasn't long before we arrived at the city's adventurer's guild branch.

It was located in a corner of a building along the main boulevard leading into the city; a simple and elegant-looking entrance with an arched roof and stone exterior. A bell chime sounded as we entered, indicating that someone was waiting on our arrival inside.

As soon as we passed through the doors, I caught sight of a young man seated behind the reception desk who quickly rose to greet us. His dark skin made his blue eyes look almost purple in comparison, giving him a striking appearance. He had a nice build to match his strong face, which seemed strangely familiar somehow.

He was probably only in his mid twenties but spoke as if he were several years older than that, yet it also felt like he was much more mature and wise about things. He wore fine clothes and was dressed neatly without any traces of grime or dirt on him. Even though this guy must have worked for some noble family or something judging by the clothing he was wearing.

Lori glanced at me sidelong with a smirk upon noticing how my gaze wandered towards the mysterious fellow standing across from us. The receptionist noticed too, I'm sure, although he didn't make me feel embarrassed at all when I looked away awkwardly. We exchanged pleasantries, and were assigned a room to stay in upstairs. Apparently, we wouldn't be able to get the paperwork submitted until morning, so we could rest and recuperate before getting back to work tomorrow.

Feeling the full effects my hangover and travel fatigue kick in, I marched straight into our assigned rooms, and downed one more of Lori's hangover potions before faceplanting into bed. I was out cold before Lori had even finished coming upstairs.

◆◆◆

When I woke up the next day, I felt refreshed and energized for some reason. My hangover had wholly disappeared overnight. Maybe that weirdo's potion really worked. I thanked Lori profusely as soon as I caught sight of her.

"Oh no, I didn't do anything Alice-chan," she protested. "Your body just healed itself naturally."

"Thanks anyway," I replied gratefully.

"Don't mention it," she giggled.

"Hey, you're looking better than yesterday!" Olimar exclaimed at the breakfast table cheerfully. "That potion must have done wonders for your health."

I blushed furiously. "Uh, thanks..."

"So, about that whole 'drunken rampage' thing you pulled the other night..." Lori interjected nervously. "Is there any chance you could tell us what happened? We need to file a formal report to the guild, and I'm afraid it will reflect badly on you if you keep quiet."

"Uhh..." I paused, unsure of what to say.

"Please, Alice-chan!" Lori urged softly. "There's no need for embarrassment. We're sisters, aren't we?"

"Um, yeah." I nodded reluctantly. "Sorry about that. Well to be honest. I blacked out entirely after one drink so I can't tell you much."

"Really?" Lori looked surprised. She leaned forward eagerly, resting both hands on the table. "Damn girlie! How'd you manage to get so drunk so quickly?! Was it laced with drugs?"

"Erm...no?" I stammered.

Captain Olimar cleared his throat pointedly. "Actually, that might have been exactly what happened. It wouldn't explain her lack of memory of the incident or passing out, but she may have very well been drugged."

"Whaaat?" I gaped incredulously.

"Well, the Picarosos have a reputation for drugging and trafficking young elves and humans. Part of their operating procedure is to get hypnotics into the drinking water of their victims," Olimar explained casually. "It turns out they may have gone in this time with the intention of abduction too. Two things turned out in the peoples' favor though."

I stared at him, speechless.

He continued, "Unfortunately for them, their preferred kidnapping drug, The Glory of Myta is a hypnotic herb that works as normal for most regular folks, but it causes temporary, rampant psychosis in people with high magical potency. The other cog in their plan was well, Lady Lorina. She eliminated most of their heavy hitters for the operation on the road. We found a near-dead beastman on the road and took him in for questioning, which led to our timey arrival at Rivershire."

Seriously? I got roofied by human traffickers on my first fucking day here?! What kind of shitty welcome is that? I couldn't imagine what other horrifying things lurked in the background waiting for me in this world.

"I knew it!" Lori clapped excitedly. "Now that explains everything! That's why you went berserk and started hugging me saying you loved me. Here I was wondering why you were screaming how much you loved me before you suddenly threw off your clothes and charged downstairs!"

I did what?

"No, wait..." I sputtered. "I mean, yes, that's part of it. But I think it's more complicated than that."

Olimar nodded stoically. "I believe that the Picaroso gang has been using a variety of drugs and poisons to control their slaves, including this mysterious herb called the Root of Bayn. This would add up, although I don't think the Myta flower would make you black out entirely...that was likely the alcohol."

"Wait, what?" I blinked. "Slaves? Like...human ones?"

"Yes," he confirmed. "Orcs, beastmen, and goblins too, apparently."

"Eyewitnesses say you went berserk and started levitating and throwing spells around like a girl possessed. All while naked as a newborn babe wreathed in storm, earth, and fire. And then, you passed out in defense of the town as a registered Rank E adventurer driving off the bandits. So technically speaking, you didn't break any laws."

"Wait a minute!" I gasped. "I'm a registered adventurer now?! What does that even mean?!"

"It means that you officially belonged to the Adventurers Guild after we picked up that mission!" Lori explained patiently. "Which is kind of cool, since you get your own membership card and rank insignia!"

"Cool..." I repeated dully. I guess.

"And now that you've proven yourself capable of fighting off an entire strike force of bandits alone, the guild master has decided to immediately promote you to Rank C!" Lori cheered. "You can be paid as a member of the reserve corps now to be called upon any time to defend the Kingdom!"

More opportunities to die horribly.

"As for your reward from the previous mission," Olimar continued, "we received word earlier today that you can expect a sizable deposit to your bank accounts within the week."

"Wow," I exclaimed happily. "Thank goodness for small blessings. There wasn't any nonsense with the magic jewel I take it?"

"Not at all!" Olimar assured me. "The King himself gave us permission to use the royal treasury to purchase the artifact."

Whew. Here I was, expecting the other shoe to drop or something. It seemed like a perfect cliché setup, after all.

Guess things did turn out okay sometimes.

"Congratulations on your promotion," Captain Olimar grinned warmly. "Welcome to the ranks of commissioned adventurers, little Alice-chan. Rank C adventurers are no joke in this world!"

I cringed in response, but I forced myself to smile.

I really, really wanted absolutely zero part of being involved in more dangerous situations.