Violence, death and cruelty were all I knew on that red Savannah.

It was during Simbi’s rise as a criminal that I got my name.

Eshu.

Given to me by a Hound who found the morality behind child soldiers fascinating.

We were children, yes but we had also aided in atrocities.

Did we retain youthful innocence by the fact that we were ignorant to the evil at hand and had no choice in any of it?

Or were we just as damned as the men who held us captive?

He thought we were somewhere in the middle.

Neither good nor evil.

And so he named all of us Eshu after the god who represented the delicate balance between all things.

I adopted this idea of balance very early on and tried my hardest to do as I was told without standing out to much, lest I become the target of abuse.

For years I slaughtered and pillaged under Simbi but what rises must ultimately fall.

His fall came at the hands of mercenaries who wanted the large bounty on his head and I still struggle to find the reason why I was spared by one of the shadows as they killed their way through Simbi’s encampment.

Was it pity?

Did the shadow pity me?

I wasn’t sure.

All I could do was cower in the bushes until the night of Downfall ended.

The following day arrived just as the shadows departed and, after scavenging for supplies in the ruined remnants of Simbi’s camp, I wondered into the red in search of… something.

Armed with a single rifle and a bag full of whatever I could carry, I walked.

But what hope did my small body ever have agaisnt the elements?

I was eventually found my a patrol team of UN soldiers who disarmed me and the bunch took me back to their base where I was kept as a kind of pet.

They didn’t know what to do with me since there were no refugee sites for hundreds of kilometers.

I spent a few months with them, serving as junior janitor of sorts and although they treated me quiet harshly, it was nowhere near as bad as life beneath the Jackals.

I also understood why some of them hated me.

My kind, Pups all, were instruments of war.

We were used as bait to get soldiers to lower their guards before ultimately betraying them.

These soldiers had probably lost countless of their battle brothers to their altruism.

I also didn’t complain since I was fed twice a day.

More months passed and as I grew, I was made to attend harder tasks.

But, just as I got comfortable in my routine, the soldiers were called further north and so they disassembled their base and made their way Northward to the nearest city while allowing me to tag along.

We drove for so long that the sands turned a color that I didn’t recognize at the time.

It was brown, damp and dull of life.

I would later learn that the reason why the sand where I came from was red was because the land had been contaminated by a chemical agent which made it virtually impossible for plant life to grow.

No one knew who exactly put it there but a popular conspiracy was that the UN contaminated the land to starve the Jackals but this also starved the indigenous people.

This meant that the UN needed to drop those people supplies.

Supplies which would ultimately be taken by the Jackals.

We eventually reached the city and the soldiers dropped me off at a local barracks.

The UN soldiers had told me time and time again that using children in war was the most despicable thing anyone could do.

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So I was a bit surprised when, upon arriving at the barracks where soldiers of the local government were stationed, I saw several soldiers who looked no older than my fourteen year old self.

Regardless, I was made to join their ranks and I quickly learnt that very little separated them from the Jackals.

The first village we were sent to protect and watch over was subjected to cruelty that matched that of the Jackals.

The soldiers raped, tortured and stole whatever they pleased while their superiors watched or participated.

But that wasn’t what bothered me.

No, my concern was my own life.

That which had, for the longest been pulled and tugged back and forth by hands other other my own.

And so, after five years of service, I joined a Private Military Company since they offered far more pay for the horrors I had to endure and commit.

My plan was to gather a substantial amount of wealth before becoming an independent mercenary.

And so I killed even more people.

Men, women and children.

I didn’t matter who my target was, I executed them without question because my life was far more important than theirs.

That’s what I thought at the time, at least.

I eventually accomplished my goal and, after parting ways with the PMC, moved to the capital where I planned to live under my own terms.

Work as an independent contractor was scarce and often required months if not years of work but it sustained me.

Although at some point it stopped being about the money.

I… I don’t even know why I kept accepting jobs but eventually I caught the attention of a government agent who was determined to see me dead.

A woman with fiery red hair and bright blue eyes.

I had killed her father, a government official, a few years earlier and she wanted revenge.

I tried killing her a few times but she was always heavily armed and tightly protected so I never got a clear opportunity.

It would also ultimately be her who killed me but by that time… I didn’t even know what I was living for.

I was a husk with bloodied hands that called itself human.

I ate and slept because I had to, not because I had any grander or lesser aspirations.

Who even was I?

And did it even matter?

.

..

I blinked a few times, bringing myself back to the present.

I glanced down at my belly and gasped upon seeing that it had grown significantly.

Housed within my Glass womb were two babies and my eyes widened to their limits as I felt their hearts softly beat.

If I were to give a human estimate, they looked about nine months old and ready for birth but I didn’t want to birth them in the dark of the chamber and so I tried standing up but my Pāttiram robe now clung too tightly to my body.

I removed my arms from its sleeves and slid the robe down to my waist, making it a sort of purple skirt before making my way to the lobby of the Temple of Tablets where I sat beneath a pillar of light that fell from the largest, central most tower.

I returned my gaze to my belly and took a deep breath while thinking of how best to birth my children.

I lightly tapped my chin, filling the silence of the temple with clinks as I thought.

A moment passed and I decided it would be best to be as direct as possible and so I positioned my hand above my belly and sunk my hands into my belly.

They passed through without obstruction since I temporarily devolved my skin and other tissues, allowing me to pick up the baby boy.

I then used Gravity Magic to carry the baby girl before tossing aside all of the fluid in my artificial womb and closing my belly.

I gently rested my children atop my lap and finally let out a breath.

However, what ended up leaving my lips was more of a whimper. One which reverberated through the Temple and exited it to fill my entire atmosphere.

I closed my eyes and felt my Uyil Belts shft.

One of them rose and reached out to my children but I stopped it from touching them.

I would hear what they had to say when they gained the ability to speak.

I wondered when that would be.

This led me to wonder just how much time had passed since I got pregnant but just as I thought of shifting my perspective, a plume of black smoke began to gather in the shadows in front of me.

The smoke assumed the form I held before I reincarnated.

Eshu.

[Mmm…] He droned, filling the air with his deep voice.

He still held a bloody hammer in his hands and his eyes still burnt terribly red but something was different.

He seemed… docile.

He sat in a relaxed manner and his head hug low.

[You know… they will all eventually die, right?] He asked in a voice that was both a whisper and a scream.

“I know.” I whispered, trying my best not to wake up my children.

[Mmm… so why- no. I suppose the question I should be asking is what you will do now and what will you do should they choose to turn their spears to you?] Eshu asked while raising his gaze to meet mine.

“I will guide them into the future personally and if they try to harm me… i will defend myself.” I answered but this made Eshu’s eyes narrow.

[Oh?] He sounded while glancing at my children.

He then let out a scoff before standing up.

[Alright but remember, our survival is paramount. Regardless of the cost.] Eshu reminded while walking out of the Temple.

As he did, his figure faded until he completely disappeared.

I allowed a moment to pass before letting out a sigh and returning my gaze to my children who still soundly slept.

I thought about what I would say to each of them when they were able to speak.

They had both lost so much so I would have to start by offering my condolences but what would that do?

I decided to focus on teaching them everything they needed to know to survive although I realized that wouldn’t be much of a problem since they were now Glass entities.

No, the ones who needed more guidance were the rest of the humanoids.

Hatua was in the middle of its biggest conflict yet and tensions in Y’shuah were approaching dangerous levels.

I wanted to help both continents personally but I also wanted to allow the humanoids some level of autonomy and freedom and so I turned to my island and the city I had randomly decided to build.

After introducing myself to the humanoids, I would build two paths from both continents which would allow them to come to my island for guidance and aid.

They would unfortunately see me as a goddess regardless of how hard I could possibly try to convince them otherwise but I was content with playing the part.

I had also played the role once before.

When Ua and her family arrived at the foot of Mount Kupumzika.

Ua...

I thought about all that she had done and accomplished.

All she had destroyed and tarnished.

I could never have foreseen any of this back when I taught her basic language and mathematical skills.

Back when her grief still gnawed on her heart with new and sharp teeth.

Now her heart had been twisted into something that was damned to destroy everything around it just as much as itself.

I wondered how to best approach this situation.

Many things would happen after I revealed myself, however, chose to wait.

I still wanted to spend a bit of time with my babies.