A sea at night, stretching as far as the eye could see.

Stars overhead, but not the right ones. Not for here. The familiar stars of home.

And looking down, I saw myself. Long brown hair, barely kept from dullness by ridiculous amounts of conditioner. Round, owlish glasses, magnifying the bags of someone who'd woken early, slept late, and stared at monitors all day. The old suit, so hated, the symbol of meaningless talks over coffee, meetings, meetings, meetings, innuendo at bars and roaming hands to forcefully slap away.

"I'm dreaming."

"Technically."

The voice made me start. Nothing was around me save the sea, but it was close. Low. Sultry. A little mocking. I spun around, trying to find the source of it.

"Over here, sweetling... Right... Over... Here."

Turning toward her as I spoke, she rose from the water, dry as a bone. Long red hair, wavy, emerald eyes, a voluptuous figure... Her eyes, though... Her eyes were old, and staring into them felt almost painful. And she knew it, laughing as I tore my eyes away from hers.

"Who are you?"

She smiled, and I could see fangs. "Why, I'm the Demon Queen, of course. What, were you expecting a spirit, or your old family, or the Goddess?"

She didn't look like a demon, just a toothy woman with ancient eye- No, I felt stupid continuing that train of thought. This is a dream, but not a dream, so what does she-

"What do I want? Oh, it's not to hurt you, sweet little Letty. No, you're strictly off limits for now. I got quite the telling off from that bimbo after my little stunt today." I almost growled. That was her fault? But I knew trying to hit her was futile. Didn't stop me wanting to. And she even tapped her cheek, turning it toward me with a smug look.

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I should have expected she'd be able to read my mind. I thought some pretty vile things about her, just to show her I knew, and she laughed.

"What a foul mind you've got, sweetling! Did you kiss your mother with that mouth? Well, I suppose you've kissed two mothers with it, what a lucky girl you are! But yes, I did that. And I'm just here to tell you some things."

"Things? I'm not going to like them, am I?" She chuckled, and her expression turned sadistic.

"Oh, you won't. I guarantee you won't. But you'll still want to hear them. For example, do you know why that blonde ditz upstairs brought you to this world?" She studied her nails, eyeing me sideways, and I couldn't help but nod.

"Every time she's brought someone from outside, it's for one of her little stories. She fancies herself a writer, you see. And her favourite genre is... Romance."

Romance? I... Okay, so love is in my future, but... I...

"Oh, it'll make sense in just a moment. You and some people are going to be brought together... Indirectly, because she can't directly affect things... And when I say some people, I hear it's a whole seven... See, right now? She's into harem fiction. And you, sweet Letty, are, like it or not, very likely to be the sole owner of a gaggle of cute girls, each with their own needs and wants... More specifically, needing you, and wanting to do things to you..."

I sputtered, and she studied her nails, clearly enjoying my reaction.

"I... I appreciate having a second life and all, but... Seven girls? And I'm destined to be with these girls, regardless of my input, or rather, they're destined to be into me, and..." I backed away, waving my hands, as, without moving, she followed, staying the same distance "...What the hell?!?"

Seven girls? Even accounting for how ridiculous this was, and how angry I was that I was summoned for, effectively, making a fan fiction, that... How could I even handle seven girls? And this was a harem fic, there's always at least one dangerous one who wants to make me her pe-

Oh no.

Oh no, please don't... Her laugh was the answer I was dreading.

"Oh, I'm not technically part of these seven at all. I'm the wild card, the eighth, if you will. And yes, I do want to keep you as a pet, a sweet, needy little pet who's well trained, so obedient, and utterly devoted to me..." My eyes widened, but she continued, her voice turning sad "...But, as I said, you're strictly off limits. Not just because I'm not into small children, but also because She Who Breathes Heavily and I have a little bet going on. Are you going to be wooed by them... Or claimed by me..."

I continued to back away, even though I knew it was pointless "Oh no no no, I'm not doing either, thank you very much, and besides, I'm not something to bet over, I'm-"

"Oh, but you are something to bet over. Sweetling, I'm bored. And she clearly has too much time on her hands as well. Since I can't do anything fun because that ditz screwed up and made people think I'm just a force of nature instead of a Demon Ruler, I take what little pleasure I can in pissing on her parade every chance I get." I jumped as she suddenly appeared right in front of my face, cupping my chin "And you, sweet little Letty, are exactly the kind of plan I've been looking to ruin. It's just a bonus I get to ruin you too."

The waters rose up, and I struggled to keep my head above ground, a futile gesture, as her final words came to me.

"I'll see you at the Academy, sweetling. You won't know it's me... But I'll know it's you. Look forward to it...~"

And, once again, everything went black.