It took a while for the girl to realize what happened. She knew she needed to apologize for hurting the boy. In fact, she did it three times to make sure he would forgive her, but, even then, the moment she turned around, he wasn't there anymore.

Why does he run away from her? The girl didn't understand. It wasn't like this before, when they first met. He was the one who wanted to be with her, so why now is he trying to escape her?

Something was rising in her chest, a weird sensation she felt strange and heavy to move. It wasn't like that other sensation she felt. It made her feel weaker than how she already is.

Still, she didn't give up. The girl didn't want to give up.

As long as she could move, she wouldn't stop. The girl knew where the boy was, just like she did it before. He was running away from her every with all his strength, altho, for her, that distance shouldn't matter. Rather, it wouldn't matter. She was weak, struggling to stand on her trembling feet. Run like before wasn't possible.

But, even then, the girl made one step at a time, walking against the wall to not her fall. Before she did even notice, she was already running towards him.

[][][][][]

And there he was, right on her grasp. Just a bit closer and she could embrace him again, but the fate wasn't in her favor. She slipped down, falling on the staircase with her face.

She thought at that moment:

(Oh, it's over...)

She was on the ground not longer than a couple of seconds, but it allowed him to increase the distance between them. Today was her only chance to talk with him alone and the girl almost got that chance, if not by that tiny and insignificant poodle placed by destiny.

But, the moment she looked up, the girl couldn't believe it.

The boy...was there. Staring at her. Worrying about her. Caring for her. His gaze sprouted something inside her. It was similar to what the girl felt when they kissed but better than before.

That sight made all of her worries blow away like it was nothing. With a smile on her face, the girl crawled up the stairs. All of her body was weird and hard to move, but even then she climbed up to him.

There was still a chance, she didn't lose yet, she could finally get her happiness!

And then...

He turned his back to her again.

It was as if the world was moving slow. In her eyes, the boy made another expression on his face and started to move away from her.

What was happening to her body at that moment? The girl felt as if she was empty, yet heavier than ever before. She couldn't feel anything, yet there was one thing bothering her.

She didn't know. She didn't know but wanted to know.

(Why does he run? Why does he run? Why does he run? Why does he run? Why does he run? Why does he run? Why does he run? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?)

Yet, she felt like she didn't want to know.

It was impossible to move as if something was pulling her from behind. She could feel it, someone is behind her. Someone is grabbing her. Someone is stopping her. Someone is making her lose again.

But looking back, there was no one. It was just her alone in the stairs.

(...Chris!)

She was paused for far too long. Even like that, the girl climbed up. It didn't matter what she felt. It didn't matter who was stopping her. All that matter was Chris.

Struggling, the girl made it to the top. The only thing she looked for was him, who was walking on a snowy floor up ahead.

The girl forces herself stand up and drags her feet as she goes towards him, but the white floor was too hard for her. With her balanced shattered, the girl falls down and laid on the ground.

There was almost no stamina left inside of her. Her eyes didn't have focus because of her exhaustion and she struggles to see ahead, trying not to lose Chris from her sight.

Without much strength, she crawls again, dragging her body through the snow to his direction, but Chris was already too far ahead. The girl was too slow to catch up with him now.

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There was no option left but to plead.

-No...wait...

But her voice was too weak to reach him.

-Wait...please...

But he did not stop. Something was happening in her chest. Something there was beating fast and faster as she watches him go away.

-Please, wait!

Her voice grew stronger, shouting to get his attention.

-Wait, please! Please!

She didn't know what she was feeling, but the girl had more strength at that moment. Even using only her arms to move her body, the girl pulls herself towards him.

-Please! Don't leave me alone!

With all her forces, the girl tries to get up.

-I don't want to be alone!

Even without balance, the girl throws herself towards him and-

-Please...wait...for...me...

Falls to the ground.

The boy already escaped the snowfield and ran away from her. Even then, her arm was stretched as if trying to reach him, but she could feel. He was already too far away for her now.

It was her loss.

Game Over.

-...No... - She said with a fragile voice

Slowly, the girl sits on her knees, dirtied with snow and mud.

-This...can't be happening...

She looks at her hands, the hands that felt harm for the first time when she embraced him.

-Please...not like this...

She closes the hand, trying to find the same feeling as before, but it already has gone away, and it would never come back. Tears falling down from her eyes as she weeps from her defeat.

-............Unfair...

Softly, she hits the ground with her fist.

-Unfair...so unfair...so much unfair...why is this so unfair...why...I want to know...tell me...why...WHY THIS IS SO UNFAIR?!

She shouts as her fists meet the ground.

-Why am I the only one?! Why am I the only one who needs to suffer?!

The girl that knew everything. She was created to know but not know to create.

-Even though I didn't have a choice like they did! Even though I envied them so much! Even though I wanted this so much!

She would see them together, talking together, having fun together, ending together.

-Why do they get it and not me?!

She was always watching as other had something she was made to never have. Over, and over, and over, and over.

-I just wanted to have something like they did! Smile like they did! Laugh like they did! Be happy like they did!

She was always alone and would always end alone. That was the history gave to her.

-But I thought! I thought that with you would be different!

Yet, there was one time she was surprised. One of many others went to her, searched for her and her alone.

-I thought! If you were with me, I could have it!

For the first time, the girl thought she was chosen. That she would finally get a chance to be like them. A chance for her own happy ending.

-But why! Why do you also leave me?!

She shouts with all her strength.

-And this! What is this?!

The girl touches her chest as if trying to dig something out like a wild animal.

-Get out of me! Get out! Get out! Get out!

She never felt this before. It was like something was trying to get out of her chest but never would leave.

-I hate this! Why am I feeling this?!

Feeling? This is a feeling? Like your heart would break at any moment?

(...Pain...)

The girl remembered. She saw it once when it happened to them.

-I don't like this! Make it stop!

She beats her chest, expecting it to go away the harder she hits it.

-Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop!

But she couldn't bear the pain, leaving her without strength and falling with her head on the ground.

Even then, the girl didn't stop hitting the origin of her suffering.

-Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it...stop it...stop...it...stop...it...please...

Finally, her stamina reaches its end. The girl couldn't move anymore. Her body laid in the cold snow and her breaths being the only thing reminding her she was alive.

There was nothing more to be done.

She wondered if this was the sensation that she had brought to others.

The despair when they realized nothing could be done

The sadness they felt knowing there is nothing to be done.

The regret when they remembered what they could have done.

The fear when they thought what would be done.

The desperation to struggle for something to be done.

The pain when they realized it was too late for anything to be done.

As she tried to stay conscious, the girl finally could felt and learn what others passed by her hands.

But it was no use. Her eyelids were heavy, her breathing was rough, her body was so cold. There was no reason to stay awake anymore. Slowly, the girl left herself fall asleep, thinking about the mistakes she made.

...

...

...

...

...

And then, when she was almost giving in to her slumber, the girl noticed something. She didn't have any strength left in her to see it, but it was coming to her.

When it was near enough, it stopped. It waited to see some reaction from the girl, but she couldn't see straight from the fatigue.

Realizing there was no movement coming from the girl, it approached her even more. Their distance now was no longer than one step away from each other.

At first, she could only see its legs from the angle her head has turned. But, she remembered who they belonged, altho she couldn't believe her own eyes.

Desperate, the girl struggled to look up and then she could confirm it. Even with her face dirtied, with watery eyes, without having any strength left, she saw who came to her.

Using any lasting energy she had, the girl managed to say his name.

-C...h...ris...