This is hell. I know a lot of people say that. “Ouch, I stubbed my toe. My car got towed. My dog took a crap on the carpet. My life is hell” You have no clue what real hell is. Sorry Karen, but you have no idea until you walk a mile in my shoes… if I had shoes… or could walk… or could move my legs. Maybe I should start at the beginning. When a man and a woman love each other very much… kidding.
A little over three years ago I was driving my parents to see my little sister’s new kid. Stan Greger, not a fan of his, thought it would be an amazing idea to drink three bottles of vodka and drive the wrong way down a highway as fast as he could. One blinding flash of light later, I woke up in a hospital. No mom, no dad and to make matters worse, the damage to my spine removed any control I had to my body. Think of it like someone coming in and unplugging the controller from your game. I can’t speak, I can’t move and have a very limited control over my own freaking eyelids. The men and women in mostly clean white lab coats call it locked in syndrome. The next three-ish years of my life have been spent staring at the walls in whatever room I happen to be in.
It hasn’t been all bad though. I had one nurse who would leave the TV on for me, I miss Betty, and I once had a couple sneak into my room for “fun time.” Hey, some guys have to pay $9.99 a month for that. If only all my days were chocolate and rainbows. My sister signing my life over to the state and cursing at me for letting our parents die was not fun. I wonder if she ever got her kids that puppy? Also one time in band camp and by that I mean the days when Vikkie the FREAK used my arm to practice her stitching. Sadly it took a few months for someone to see the marks. I still shutter at those memories, well if I could shudder that is. Enough backstory for now. I should be depressed or crazy, but I've been there, done that. It gets boring after a while. You know what you need to know.
{Steven Edwards}
This brings us up to date. I’m laying in a bed, feeding tube, five o’ clock shadow, and the same white bare walls. The sun set hours ago and just to add insult to injury, I can't sleep thanks to an itch on my leg. I could hear the sound of someone walking up the hall. Tonight should be Frank and Dave… I think. They don’t tell me anything these days. My door opens and Frank walks in. He’s a large dark man built like a linebacker with almost no hair. His plain brown scrubs look fresh and pressed, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him smile, but I’ve also never seen him angry. He looked around my room. {Sorry bud nothing here for you to steal.} I’ve started to think about people in case I get lucky and find some psychic kid or dog who can hear me. Frank leans over me. {Gods no, Please tell me you aren’t going to kiss me. Frank, I’m flattered, but you’re not my type.}
He unplugged my heart monitor and looked at his watch. {What the hell dude?} I asked. Dave walked in and smiled as he looked around the room.
“I just got the code. We have to wait five minutes before we can bag him,” Dave said, with a chuckle. He is a short white guy with long dirty hair. He looks like your average fat stoner. His scrubs are a bit stained and I hope they were always that shade of green.
{Guys what is going on? Is it my birthday?}
“We have to discharge the AICD at least three times to make it look right.” Frank says calmly. Both men play with the defibrillator for a bit before putting it away. Frank left the room while Dave began to unplug me from everything.
“Man, you’ve made us happy and rich today. Because of you my kiddo will get a new bike and his daddy gets a new car.” he started laughing. Frank came back with a large black bag just as Dave removed my feeding tube. {Is this it guys? Tell Betty she’s the best and tell Vikkie that I hope she finds someone just as messed up as she is and tell little Timmy to stay away from the well and give that poor dog a break.}
“Remember we have to be at the dock in one hour. He’ll have to stay in the bag at the morgue until then. Leave it unzipped so he can breathe. They aren’t going to pay for a dead body.” Frank growled at Dave.
“I know, I know. I won’t screw this up.” Dave said, shaking his head from side to side.
{Selling me is one thing, but Dave you screw up. The least you could do is wash your pits and brush your teeth. What the heck did you even eat?} I should be more concerned by everything, but maybe I’ll get lucky and my nightmare will be over soon. At the very least this is better than just laying here. Dave left to get a gurney as Frank looked down at me, my head poking out of the bag.
“For what it matters, I’m sorry man. I hope you can forgive us.”
{Ah, Frank. I didn’t know you cared.}
Both men lifted my frail body in its new fun travel case on to my new ride. {weeeee.} I inwardly screamed as we moved down the halls. {coming into first place Steven Edwards. (the sound of a cheering crowd here) Hope no one has a blue turtle shell.} My chauffeur, the all stinky Lord Dave the third, pushed me down the hall as good boy Frank was walking beside us. Both men seemed quiet as I started to sing some song in my head. Suddenly a thought came to me. {Gods, I hope I don’t fart in this thing.} The lights moved past the slit in the bag as we made our way through the hospital. Far too soon, I saw the double door of a dark cold room. {Ping, You have arrived at your destination.} I thought in a mocking feminine voice. Dave and Frank left me in the cold room after uncovering my face. {Now the fun part, counting the tiles. Just as I thought, seventeen. At least of the ones I can see and if I take a wild guess, twenty-eight. That is far more tiles than my old room had. I wonder how many my new one will have?} Finally the pair came back to me. {About time guys.} We moved down another passageway, my face covered back up. {I’m going on a car ride. I’m going on a car ride.} I chant as lights move past the crack again. A door buzzes and a security guard looks over at me. He’s very overweight, bald and missing a lot of teeth. His uniform looks like he pulled it off the floor where several cats he takes care of took turns on it. I’m very grateful he doesn’t lean in for a look.
“Another nighttime med waste shipment?”
{You get like fifteen dollars an hour dude. The least you can do is see that the bag is open or maybe, just maybe talk like a normal person. Also I’m calling you Fred from this point on.}
“Yep all we have is this one.” Frank said and I can hear the sound of paper rustling in the wind. Then it hits me. {Great, it’s freaking cold out here and no one put my socks on.} Must be winter. I hear a vehicle drive up to what I think is the dock and doors open and close. Fred said something to the driver and my body was lifted into a pad in the back. The doors close and I’m left in darkness once more.
{Good-bye Frank, I hope you have a good one. Good-bye Dave I hope you rot in hell. Good-bye Fred, I hope you get a new brain soon, and with that I end my turn} The driver got back in and started the van. At least I think I’m in a van given how much leg room I have. He drove for a short while and stopped in a dark area. I wished I could look out the window. I feel the van shake as his steps draw closer. {Please don’t be a death cult. I don’t want to die sacrificed to a dark lord. Oh also no sex cult. Please no sex cult} I begged. He unzipped my bag and smiled at me.
“Hi there Mr Edwards. I’ll try not to make a twilight joke about your name. Call me Travis.”
{Ho, I like you Travis. Please call me Steven.} I look at the thin kid standing over me. He has to be in his mid-twenties with short red hair and thick glasses. A warm smile lights his face, the smell of some kind of body spray clings to him. He wore a gray jumpsuit that more than likely had some BS logo on the back.
“We have to change vans in like ten-ish minutes so while we wait, do you want to listen to music or we could just talk?”
{Dealer’s choice. I’m just happy to have someone else in the room. You are the kindest cultist I’ve ever met.}
This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.
“I left the van running so it should be comfortable for you in here, but just in case here is a blanket. That should keep you warm until we can get you to your new home.” Travis said, putting a thick blanket over me.
{Travis you are a doll. I hope some young lady snatches you up soon.} he started to unzip his jumpsuit and I got a little worried. {Hay, Travis. Dude sorry but I don’t swing that way.} luckily he just pulls the suit off revealing a freaking Godzilla shirt. {Man you are a freaking nerd. High five… mind five... Good job.}
“So just a heads up we have about an hour drive to your new home, but until then we can just relax. I hope you can actually hear me in there. According to your file, you’re aware of your surroundings. God, I’m so pumped for our new project. Man, I can't wait. There is so much I want to tell you, but I can’t until things actually happen. Doc says we can't talk about this stuff outside.”
{Dude Decaf. Slow down. From the sounds of things I may not be a sex cult’s fleshlight any time soon. Lucky me.}
“And the best part is we are working on the cutting edge of…” he stopped and looked down at me with a smile on his face. “I can't talk about it.” he laughed and looked out the window. “Crap she’s here. Be right back buddy.” he patted my shoulder and opened the door. Cold air rushed in and I wish I could⁷ shiver. A woman’s voice came through the open door.
“How is subject 01?”
“01 is stable, unresponsive, and clear to move to the facility.”
“Nice work Dr. Walker.” her voice was calming, but a bit cold
“Thank you Dr. Winters. I think it would help him if we play music or talk to him.”
{Damn Dr. Winters sounds both hot as hell and cold as hell at the same time. I wonder what she looks like. Also seems fitting for Winters to pick me up in winter.} I inwardly laugh at my own joke.
“Good call. You can ride in the back to keep 01 company”
{Subject 01? Does that really mean I’m number one? I’m the best, yeah.} hands move my body onto a gurney, and from there into the back of an ambulance. Dr. Winters turned out to be a hot blonde with thick glasses. The coat she wore hid her body, but she had a young kind face. She looked thin but not unhealthy. If she put on five or ten pounds it would help her looks. She had to be in her early twenties but the lines on her face showed she laughed as much as she worried. The type of librarian who would read fifty shades of gray between working on a degree and keeping a cat company. {things are looking up for me.} Travis sat in the back with me and helped me out of my travel suit, even put socks on me. {Lucky day. Freaking Socks are the best things ever made.} I felt something roll down my cheek and Travis looked at me slightly worried.
“Dr. Winters,” Travis said. “I think Edwards is crying. Do you think that means he’s happy?”
“I’d like to think so, but soon we’ll know.”
{Shut up Travis you traitor. Don’t tell the sexy librarian that I’m crying. Follow the man code bro.}
“Dr. Winters?”
“Yes Dr. Walker?”
“Since we are working together could we use our first names and call him Steven?”
{Yes, yes, yes. Gods, yes. Please call me Steven.} Something slid down my cheek again. Not my fault. it’s the cold or allergies or just shut up.
“I don’t see why we can’t Travis. Just make sure that we keep it professional in our reports and in meetings.” Dr Winters said and I could hear the smile in her voice.
“Thank you Dr. Winters. I mean Emma. Also he just let another tear out.”
{Really man. Really?}
“Just log anything else that happens with Subject, Steven. Log anything else that happens with Steven so long as it’s important.”
“Can do Doc.” a strange snorting giggle came from the front.
{Best day of my life… Ever.}
“Hey bud, we are about half-way there. I think the Doc is getting excited about everything.” Just then music came over the speakers. It was some party country song and much to my eternal joy Travis began to dance or at least as much as anyone can in the back of a moving ambulance. I wish I could make some snarky comment about her choice of music or Travis liking it but, to be honest, I was just having fun being around others and being treated like a human for the first time in years. After several songs and far too much bad dancing from Travis, we slowed and finally stopped. I had a new hospital gown, socks and blanket when the doors opened again. They rolled my bed out and through a number of hallways and into a dimly lit room. I was lifted onto what happened to be the softest bed I’ve ever been on and my body was moved into a sitting position. Computers lined the tan walls and a large screen was in the center facing my bed. People came in and began to check my vitals.
{I must be the new VIP. Now that we have all gathered together. Let's talk about the elephant in the room. Travis, I’m sorry, but you can't dance.}
“Dr. Winters, Dr Walker, anything to report?” a stern older woman said. She looked like the ruler across the knuckles type. Her black hair was up in a bun and more than likely stayed that way all the time. Her slightly heavier build was in a lab coat that covered all I could see. If Emma was the librarian, then this woman was the English teacher.
“Subject 01 shed several tears during the trip, but seems in good health.” Travis replied
{Come on man. You have to tell every woman in this place that I cried. I’m never getting laid.} I mentally said with an inward chuckle.
“Good, after the check up we can begin Phase One.”
“Really. On day one. Isn’t that moving a bit fast?” Emma asked.
“Dr. Winters, we have everyone here. We have all the equipment. I’m ready to light this fire. Do you really want to wait to open your Christmas gifts?”
{Does that mean it really is Christmas? Best Christmas ever.}
“Dr. Rose, I can't argue with you. One you’re my boss and two I don’t want to wait either. Just trying to be the voice of reason here.” Emma said. Dr. Rose just nodded and stood with her hands behind her back. Travis and Emma put on lab coats and joined the others moving around me. My feeding tube went in easily. I could even see a small screen that showed my steady heart rate and blood pressure.
{You guys are pros.} The way they moved implied skill, training and dedication. Emma began to attach a cage of wires on my head with a chin strap. {Even got me a silly hat, best birthday party ever. Do I get a clown too?} The only thing that made this uncomfortable was a slight tickle in my nose. {NO. no no no no no no no nooooooooo. Itch.} My nose itches. {Someone. Anyone please scratch my nose.” Torture. This is the point I fear, a random itch I can’t scratch. I tried to focus on anything, but this is the worst.
“Everyone clear. Begin, now.” Dr. Rose said, looking over at the screen. The blank screen flickered and then showed white letters in bold.
N O S E.
“Nose?” Dr. Rose asked. I looked in amazement at the screen. No way was this real.
I T C H N O SE.
“Does your nose itch?” Dr. Rose looked over at me and asked.
YEEEEESSSSSSS Y E S. Emma removed a glove and leaned over me her hand out.
“Steven.” she looked into my eyes. “What side?”
LEFTLEFTLEFTLEFTLEFTLEFT. NOSE LE FT. One manicured finger reached out and scratched my nose on the left side. HOLLL YY CRR RRRAAAAAPPP PPPPPPPPP. Everyone in the room was still, their eyes moving between me and the screen. Dr. Rose smiled and turned saying as she left.
“Phase One success. We’ll work on refining it from here. Good work everyone. That includes you Mr. Edwards. Welcome to the team.”
(Dr Florence Rose)
Dr. Rose walked to her office and turned on her computer. It began to chime with an incoming video call. She pushed the green button after seeing who it was.
“Dr. Rose. How did things go tonight?” President Martan asked. He was an old man who looked like everyone’s kind grandfather.
“Mr. Martan. Subject 01 and 03 are stable and getting settled. We have tested Phase One on 01 and had a minor success. Strangely enough he requested we scratch his nose.” The man sat forward looking closely at her.
“Amazing Doctor. Please send me the video on that.” Dr. Rose just nodded. “What about the others?” he asked on the edge of his chair.
“02 and 04 were actually brain dead. We had them transferred to a long term care facility. As for 05. He turned out to be fully capable and was trying to hide from legal repercussions by pretending to be locked in. We turned him over to the police when he tried to escape us. Moving forward I would like to refer to Mr. Edwards as 01 and Miss. Winters as 02.”
“How is Miss. Winters? Her file was a bit,” he cleared his throat, “disturbing.”
“Only time will tell. We are showing positive brain activity when we play children’s cartoons for her. The highest being the Little Elf Princess. I’ve also made sure she is only allowed female staff for now.”
“Good call on that one. Good luck and keep me posted.” He ended the call and Dr. Rose leaned back in her chair uncorking a bottle of wine. She looked at her reflection in the monitor for a while, the wine in her hand growing warm. There was a sad smile on her lips as she was lost in thought. It hadn’t occurred to her what it would be like being locked in until this moment. Being trapped and unable to even die. She shuttered and took a sip.
“A freaking itchy nose.” She sighed and drained the glass. “I need to focus. We have a job to do and it won’t get done unless we start.” She knew it wouldn’t be a working night though. Her thoughts were on what her family would think of this project and if her mom would be proud of her choices. This was her chance to do some real science and make this world different and hopefully for the better. “I wonder if Nobel had these same thoughts when he made nitroglycerin?” For the good of humanity or for my own ego? I need more wine.” she looked over and her vision swam for a moment. She was drunk. “When did this happen and why are there two empty bottles on my desk?” She stood and wobbled to a couch in her office. “Sleeping here sounds good.”
She used her coat as a blanket and a throw pillow for her head. Closing her eyes she saw the blank look in Mr. Edward’s eyes as he looked out at them. What was he thinking right now? Would he hate them for treating them like this?