The world before me had not changed. It was no bigger than an astroid (and a small one at that) and it was dotted with cute figures and neat little buildings with well drawn, but clumsy art; this world was not yet a cartoon, but close to it. A mix between reality and animation. Like a well-done realistic drawing of a cartoon character that was close to hyper-realism but retained just enough cartoonish qualities to still be recognized as a cartoon-origin. And it was all the same as a moment ago with the exception of one important addition— me.
Floating closer toward the circle— fully two-dimensional, I know realized, in horror, as the third-dimension had been removed— I saw a figure that was me. He was dressed in my formal slacks, something that I always wore to work in order to impress the bosses and ‘look the role I wanted.’ His shirt was clean cut, gray, polo with black and white stripes. Shoes, cozy white. And a nametag just visible hanging on my shirt, something I rarely took off since I worked full time and wore the same clothes day in and out.
Yes, this was me. The only thing that was not me, that was not in my style, was that I was now wearing what appeared to be a zippable hoodie whose color scheme I could not identify. At once it seemed red. Then black. Then white and a dozen other colors at once. If I stared too long at it, it seemed to draw me in and I dared not give myself over to its mysteries. Not yet, anyway. Because now, I noticed that on my head was Felix. Resting in his usual spot.
But . . . looking at the resting figure on my head, I noticed he was fast asleep, with even small little “Zzzzzz” raising up like smoke from his nodding noggin. I needed to wake him and talk about what was happening; but how?! I was this disembodied essence looking down at myself from the cosmos. How could I . . .
And then I noticed it. The hoodie with the odd colors. I felt that this was the way. I stared at it. Lost myself to it. And when I regained myself, I was back in my body.
One victory! And grand though it may have been, it did not prepare me for what my world had become in first person. Lord have mercy, because it was a kick in the nards and a half; I opened my eyes and saw a realm with not three dimensions, but two . . . or two and a half.
No, scratch that. It was a kick in two nards.
~ ~ ~
The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes to this new world was some shop.
But it was before me in a strange way. It lacked that third dimension. It was not, however, exactly two-dimensional, however; because if it were two dimensional, I would only be able to see its edges as a straight line. I would not be able to make out details. Instead, the front of the shoppe was toward me, but leaning toward me at an angle, nearly to the point of looming over me. It was as though the lost third dimension was squeezed into the third at a cheap rate and so I saw the most important details, but the physical properties were lost. Not quite 2D but neither 3D.
I took a belabored step— and I say belabored since I was now at this point truly and well TERRIFIED as it were like the world slung toward me. With the steps I took, the world vibrated; a bit like how in classic cartoons everyone was always jittery; with my steps, the world jittered about, but only for a moment. That vibration seemed to ‘hide,’ the ‘animation,’ so to speak, of me approaching the building in front of me and it becoming larger.
As dynamic as walking seemed, though, when I stopped after a couple of steps and tried to look to either my left or right, I found that I could not bend my head in either direction more than a slight nod: all I could manage was a slight, and I do mean ever so slight, bend to glimpse details.
By now, I was thinking of how I would do other things. Turning around, for example, and sleeping in a bed, how was all of this going to work out? But I found at least raising my hands was easy, though the mechanical way in which I did it was too robotic for my liking. Gently, I patted Felix and urged him awake.
I rubbed and pushed him gently, at first, and then more roughly. I needed the condolences of a friend as I wrestled with this new orientation.
“Wake up, you buttercat, fuck!” I said with passion and a ribbing harder than I intended.
I can’t say that his eyes shot awake, but he definitely woke up. “What the fuck, mortal, I was enjoying a nice little sleep and you can’t even let me have that, eh, you . . . wait, what happened?”
I babbled back a response but it was incoherent. I attempted to tell Felix of the new face of the world, but he seemed nonplussed.
Hate to break the news to you, but the world is not any different. To me, anyway. Felix said, our telepathic link restored.
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Legit, I could not handle this and I snapped, “What the fucking fuck, bro? What the fucking hell do you mean it doesn’t look any different? Everything is like fancy high-def cardboard and color paper. Where is the fucking third-goddamn-dimension?! The shit-eating shit you mean it is not any different?!”
And like a true cat, indifferent to the woes of humanity, Felix began to clean himself. While he was on me.
Felix said, after a vigorous licking of his limbs, that the pact effects everyone differently. And honestly, matey. Count yourself lucky that we survived. So you see the world in a slightly different way. More aesthetic. Less abstract. Or whatever. I have heard of people who endured a far worse pact curse than them seeing existence from another perspective.
“So, you and everyone else who lives in the under-reality, and all of that, have always seen the world like this? Like some kind of weird two-and-a-half dimensional freakscape?” I asked.
Yeah. Commonplace. It is the core of reality, really. No fluff. Just the actuality of truth. Speaking of which . . . you are going to find that a lot more than perspective has changed since you’ve made the pact. But I won’t lay it on you now. Slowly integrate it and whatnot.
Hanging my head in exhaustion, I found Felix’s words utterly hopeless— just how much of my old life was still there?! The monk members of the organization said that everything I knew would still be here, like friends and family and my job, but I was having some doubts. Contemplating these things, I didn’t even realize that I was staring at my strange hoodie. And from that instant too bold of mindlessly looking at my hoodie, I realized my mistake too late, and I was catapulted back out into the cosmic planet viewer perspective.
~ ~ ~
Ugh! If I had a body to puke, I would have vomited profusely after that stomach-churning experience.
Wait. A sensation . . .
It was a second-and-you-miss-it moment, but my body back on the little 2D planetoid did, in fact, puke; a brief green animation fell out of his (my) mouth and to the ground.
What’s with the puking, mate?! Oh, yeah. Vertigo.
“Felix? Where are you? Felix?!” I said, although I do not know if I spoke it, thought it, or willed it.
Uh, I am still on your head. Where I have been since pretty much we met.
I swelled with relief. Thank the light that Felix was still with me.
“Sorry, mate, but I am not in my body. I am, like . . . out of my body, staring at the world, thingy,” I said.
Felix asked me to explain what I meant since it sounded like I was under the influence of something. Or crazy. And I tried my best to inform him about looking at this world from its early form as a black dot, to this later form where I could see the whole tiny-ass planet. Flat. Two-dimensional. And with buildings obtusely jutting out from the brown circle that was supposed to represent the earth.
Oh, really?! That is how you perceive the whole reality, huh? Trippy. But that is, as I said a moment ago, just aesthetic. Entering into a pact, bruh, changes you. Messes with your head.Let’s you see the core reality. The whole reality; it effects everyone differently. I think how one sees the world, though, after a pact, is based partly on their own psychology?
“So, just so that I have this straight: the two-dimensional shit . . . that is what everyone in the under-reality sees all the time. But the way in which I see it, in this case, the world being like this collage made from sharp and smart construction paper and random shit, is just my own articulation of that two-and-a-bit-more dimension?”
Yes. More or less. But be guarded. Because, bro . . . it will likely get weirder. Felix replied with a level of uncertainty in his voice that did not reassure me.
“Riddle me this, then,” I asked. “what is with the planet-viewer perspective? It is like I am a god playing a video game of Earth and all of the planet and peoples have been condensed into macro-representational allegories of themselves, like this planet is the world map or some shit!”
Hey, buddy, you said it . . . not me. Felix said weirdly cooly. And coyly.
“Context, please?”
Silence. Classic. Just like the last night. Felix doesn’t have an answer so he— hey, I am just thinking, mate. And besides, I am not always an answer sheet. I am just a humble Catticus. But, ummm . . . this time, yeah, I am not really sure why you are able to take in a whole view of the world. Like, you are able to see the world? The whole world? Since there is not really a third dimension, you are seeing the world on its side, correct?
I said that I did. Felix was again silent for a moment. Then, he said, Huh. My best guess is that because your Frequency is different, somehow, I am still not quite sure how it is different, maybe that Frequency became super-charged during the pact and connected to, like . . . a satellite or powerful deity that is just hanging around in outer space? Unlikely. More likely, what it is is that your Frequency just connected to Chaos-Blankness. And because Chaos-Blankness surrounds reality, both upper and lower, then maybe you are able to see the whole world as this simplified representation?
I didn’t know about duck-fuck any of that, but I sure as shit hoped that I wasn’t connected to some asshole space demon; that would blow chodes, for sure. For my own sake, I decided to go with the whole ‘connected to chaos-whatever’ bullshit that although I am sure Felix was pulling out of his ass, at least gave me some comfort; it made some kind of sense, assuming any of what he was talking about actually existed— it does!— and it was by far the least terrible explanation for why I could see the world like a simple world map. A two-dimensional one, at that.
So, you just sort of suddenly became disoriented. That means you can switch perspectives? Like, you were doing fine when I woke up. Then you freaked out. And like a switch, you started to talk about space and seeing the world.
“Yeah,” I said, trying my best to take deep breaths and slowly exhale. “I can switch between first person and this second -person perspective by staring into my hoodie. Weird, right?”
Oh, that is what that is: your full-time organization uniform. Blends into everyday life well enough. Strange power. It is incredible and rare, Marcus, for any kind of garments to be infused with magickal energy.
Wait— fucking wait!
“MAGIC?!”