I’ve never understood the whole thing about Christmas in July. Christmas in June makes more sense to me because June is exactly halfway through the year! So, you only got half the time left to wait!

But not understanding the theme of the One Trick Pony’s Monday theme isn’t going to stop me coming. Ever since I quit that diner, I’ve never felt any more freer. Leaving Edelweiss seems closer.

But I can’t.

Me and Evangeline are in line for the women’s room. We’ve been waiting ten minutes but there is no line for the men’s.

I consider going into the men’s room, but Evangeline won’t let me live it down.

She’s also been convincing me to stay. It’s starting to work. I lean back at the wall and pout.

“I don’t know why you’re not supportive of me,” I reply.

“I wanna support you but I don’t wanna see you get hurt. And are you sure you can take your grandma with you?”

“I’ll make it work,” I assure her. “I got money saved. I got phone interviews. It’s happenin’”.

The line slowly inches forward, and we take two steps forward, like a chain gang. It’s a sort of torture of some kind, but the farther into the bathroom we get, the friendlier all the girls get.

“Won’t be the same dear, if you’re not here with me,” Evangeline says.

“Well come with me then!”

“I can’t! Who’s gonna fix the diner? Who’s gonna run it when Dad gets old? No one goes there no more and no one wants to work there either!”

A girl doing her makeup in the mirror turns to us and says, “Well if no one goes why you still here dear? Go with her!”

Another one next to her adds her two cents as well, saying she got a point there, alright.

“Come with me, Evangeline. Come. It won’t be the same if I leave with or without you.”

“What will I do out there anyway? You know you want Annabelle, always have.”

The line moves up again, we take a few steps, and now I am first in line.

Thank God.

“You can find out what you want when we get there,” I say. “Trust me. You’ll always wonder ‘what if’ if you never come.”

The stall to the largest bathroom opens and me and Evangeline dash inside. Someone in the line argues about how she’s cutting in line but all the other women in the restroom laugh at her.

I give a silent prayer while I pee and Evangeline text messages someone or other on her phone while faces away. Some people think it’s weird that we do this, but honestly, it works great at parties and bars.

Evangeline and I didn’t know each other well when we were younger, but as we got older, we became closer and that changed. Charlie was a boy and couldn’t go everywhere with me, and then he went through the weird phase where “all girls are gross”, but thankfully in high school he got over that.

At least I thought I did until I saw him kissing Nick.

Evangeline takes her turn, and we wash our hands. Finally, we do one last check, making sure the other is absolutely, positively, killing it. When we leave the restroom, I’m trying to make my way to the sign up board but Evangeline taps my shoulder.

“Look who it is,” she points.

It’s Nick.

“I don’t care for him. I don’t wanna see him,” I say flatly.

Evangeline gives me a knowing look and we look at each other, silently, making eye contact, the message received.

“You jealous of Nicholas,” Evangeline says. “Why?”

“No. No I’m not. I just gotta tell him goodbye is all. Been avoiding it. Him.”

“You’ve gotta stop avoding your problems Anna. Go.”

I came up with a wonderful excuse.

“It’s a little loud in here,” I say.

“Well take him out there through the side exit. Y’all can talk and you can finally stop being ridiculous,” she laughs. “Charlie loves you.”

“I know,” I said pain in my voice. “He always will.”

I weave through the crowd, lightly pushing people aside to get to Nick who is at the bar, drinking eggnog of all things. He always looks kinda sad until someone talks to him, or he’s writing. It’s like the poor guy is always stuck on something.

But I don’t care no more.

I wanna give him a piece of my mind.

Outside in the alley, when we’re finally alone, I finally crack.

“What do you think of me? Did you like the other night,” I ask him.

The night were we were together. Where I thought we were friends. That he was my hero, a somewhat shy guy who was opening up to me. All along he was a snake.

“Uh yeah, yes. I would love to spend another night with you and get to know you more,” he replies.

I am so confused.

Is he bullying me?

He seems nervous but happy at the idea of hanging out with me again, but I am not gonna fall for it again.

“I bet you’d like that wouldn’t you? I bet you’d like to tell me all sorts of things!”

Nothing but lies. I bet he lied about writing. Bet he lied about his name even.

As I’m about to call him a liar he gets close. Too close. Now I’m nervous. He leans in closer, and I can feel his breath on my ear. This is when I realized that the person, he couldn’t keep his eyes off of last week was not Charlie, but me.

“I would love to be alone and tell you all sorts of things,” Nick whispers in my ear. “I want to do all sorts of things to you.”

My face is warm as he kisses my neck and I feel tingly all over.

I am stupid for being alone in a dark alley with a man I met two weeks ago, but I am also angry. As Nick is kissing me, I come up with an idea. A stupid idea. I’ll date Nick and then break his heart, the way he broke mine when he stuck his tongue down Charlie’s throat.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

The idea seems better and better as Nick gets even more passionate with me. I’m starting to feel embarrassed that it feels a little good because I’m not sure what’s happening anymore. I’ve never done more than let a man touch my chest and suddenly I’m letting Nick rub my butt. I moan and for some reason, down there twitches.

I forget I’m in an alley as I start to think about what he looks like naked.

I forget I’m in an alley when one of his hands goes up my dress and I let him.

I remember I am in an alley when Charlie opens the exit and sees us glued to each other.

“I was looking for you and Evangeline said y’all went out this way,” Charlie said. “Guess I know why.”

Why did she tell him? Was she drunk? Why?

I realized my dress is a little high and I fix it, trying to find a way to escape. I can leave the alley at any time, but I feel like I’ve done something wrong. I didn’t think it would be this bad.

Charlie said he’ll always love me.

I guess Charlie will have to put his money where his mouth is.

“I’m sorry Charlie,” I say. “ I can’t wait on you to make a move. You should have told me you liked me a long time ago.”

Charlie is angry. I thought he’d be sad but instead he looked terrifying. I feel small in front of him and bite the inside of my cheek. Nick looks confused but doesn’t say anything, probably because he started this mess to begin with.

“You’re despicable,” Charlie says. “You know I don’t stand a chance.”

His eyes go red, but he doesn’t cry. He isn’t sad, but so angry it’s the type of anger that makes you shake and want to cry.

“You always talk about leaving here, becoming famous, doing all sorts of things when you leave here Annabelle Lee. Well, leave and never come back,” he says.

“I will leave. I will become a star.”

“There are hundreds upon thousands of singers and ain’t all of them are famous.”

“Don’t you-“

“I’m a better singer than you. I’ll ruin you. I swear it.”

He slams the door shut and leaves Nick and I in the alleyway.

I don’t want Nick to know that I know that he kissed Charlie. Suddenly I don’t want him to hate me. Charlie hates me, and my biggest fear has come true.

Charlie has left me.

I deserve it.

“I think I’m gonna go home Nick. I don’t wanna argue no more tonight.”

“That’s ok. That’s fine. Just promise to call me later?”

“I promise.”

He looks disappointed, worried, and somehow exhausted when he barely said a thing the entire night. I sigh, get in my old lemon of a car, and scream.

“I just act in the moment. Grandma’s right, I just do whatever I feel, I don’t think,” I say out loud to myself.

I remember that Grandma forgets everything. She is the best at keeping secrets. She will tell me what I need to hear and judge me for it, but she won’t remember in a few days anyway.

It’s a very quiet drive home.